He Said She Said Part 2: How Men and Women Communicate Differently

CT Buzz

10 Oct 201604:27

Summary

TLDRIn this insightful discussion, communication expert Steve Rohr delves into the nuances of how men and women communicate differently, both in personal and professional settings. He explains that men tend to approach from the side to avoid confrontation, while women's direct approach can be misinterpreted. Rohr highlights that men rely on mental imagery for memory, often recalling visual details but not specific dates, unlike women who remember comprehensive details. He advises understanding rather than frustration in such situations. Rohr also touches on the fact that men process thoughts internally before speaking, while women often think out loud to reach a decision. The conversation emphasizes the importance of giving men space when they retreat and the need for active listening when women share problems, rather than immediately trying to fix them. For more insights, Steve's book can be found at RealSteveRohr.com.

Takeaways

👥 Men and women communicate differently in various contexts, including the workplace and personal life.
🚶‍♂️ Men typically approach each other from an angle or the side, not head-on, which can be misinterpreted as confrontational by women.
👩‍❤️‍👨 Men remember visual details about significant events, while women tend to remember the exact date and circumstances.
🤔 Men are more likely to forget dates because they focus on mental imagery rather than specific details.
🗣️ Women often speak before they think, using conversation as a way to process their thoughts, unlike men who process internally before speaking.
🧠 Men process conversations internally before expressing them, which can lead to misunderstandings about their level of care or concern.
🏠 When a man needs space or retreats to his 'man cave,' it's important to give him time alone rather than trying to 'fix' the situation.
👂 Listening is crucial when a woman has a problem; men should focus on understanding and empathizing rather than immediately trying to solve the issue.
🔧 Men have a natural tendency to want to fix problems, but women often just need to be heard and validated.
📚 For more insights, Steve Rohr's book can be found on his website, RealSteveRohr.com.

Q & A

How do men and women typically approach each other differently?
-Men usually approach each other from an angle or the side, not head-on, while women tend to approach directly from the front.
Why might a man perceive a woman approaching him from the front as confrontational?
-A man might see a direct frontal approach as confrontational because it is not the typical way men approach each other, which is more often from an angle or the side.
What is the difference in how men and women remember significant dates?
-Men tend to remember the visual imagery and how their partner looked on significant dates, but may not remember the exact date. Women, on the other hand, remember the date, time, and even details like what shoes they wore.
Why might a man forget an anniversary, according to the communication expert?
-A man might forget an anniversary because when in love, men focus on mental visual imagery rather than dates, whereas women engage in memory activity that includes the date.
What does a study suggest about how men can show they care?
-A study suggests that if a man engages in an activity that demonstrates he cares about a woman's emotions, it can be enough to show his concern.
How do men and women differ in their thought processes before speaking?
-Men process their thoughts internally before speaking, often having made a decision by the time they verbalize it. Women, however, often speak to process their thoughts out loud, seeking to figure out what to do.
What should you do when a man needs his own time or retreats to his 'man cave'?
-When a man retreats to his space, it's important to give him time alone. Women should avoid trying to fix the situation, as this can make the man feel more vulnerable.
What is the typical reaction of women when they have a problem?
-Women often want to talk about their problems and seek someone to listen to them. They are not necessarily looking for solutions but rather the act of being heard.
How should men respond when a woman needs to talk about a problem?
-Men should listen attentively without trying to immediately fix the problem. Understanding and acknowledging the woman's feelings is more important than offering solutions.
Where can one find more information or resources from the communication expert mentioned in the script?
-You can find more information and resources from the communication expert at his website, RealSteveRohr.com.

Outlines

00:00

🗣️ Communication Differences Between Men and Women

The paragraph discusses the distinct ways men and women communicate, both in personal and professional settings. It highlights that men tend to communicate by making statements, while women ask questions. The expert, Steve, explains that men approach each other from the side or an angle, not directly, which can be misinterpreted by women as confrontational or evasive. The paragraph also touches on how men remember events through visual imagery, often recalling the visual details but not the exact date, unlike women who remember the entire context. It suggests understanding rather than anger when men forget dates like anniversaries. The importance of recognizing that men show care through actions rather than words is emphasized, and it mentions that men process thoughts internally before speaking, unlike women who often think out loud. The paragraph concludes with advice on giving men space when they need it and the importance of listening to women without the intent to fix their problems.

Mindmap

Keywords

💡Communication

Communication refers to the process of exchanging information, ideas, or feelings through speech, signals, writing, or behavior. In the video, communication is central to understanding the differences in how men and women interact. The script discusses how men and women communicate differently in the workplace and personal life, highlighting the importance of recognizing these differences to improve interpersonal relationships.

💡Approach

An approach in this context refers to the manner in which individuals initiate contact or interaction with others. The video script points out that men typically approach each other from an angle or the side, rather than directly from the front, which can be perceived as confrontational. Women, on the other hand, may approach directly, which can lead to misunderstandings if not understood within the correct cultural or gender-specific communication norms.

💡Memory Activity

Memory activity pertains to the cognitive processes involved in recalling past experiences or events. The script illustrates that men may remember visual details from significant moments, like how their partner looked on a date, but not the exact date itself. Women, in contrast, are shown to engage in more detailed memory recall, remembering not just the date but also specific details like the time and what shoes they wore.

💡Emotional Care

Emotional care is the act of showing concern and attention to another's feelings and emotional well-being. The video emphasizes the importance of men showing that they care about their partner's emotions, which can be enough to convey emotional care. This is a key aspect of communication between men and women, as it can help bridge gaps in understanding and support.

💡Processing

Processing in the context of the video refers to the internal thought processes that individuals go through before speaking or making decisions. Men are described as processing more before they speak, having already considered the conversation in their minds before verbalizing it. Women, conversely, are shown to process out loud, using verbal communication as a tool to work through their thoughts and feelings.

💡Decision-Making Protocol

Decision-making protocol refers to the customary or typical way in which individuals make decisions. The script suggests that men and women have different protocols; men are portrayed as making decisions internally before discussing them, while women may discuss and deliberate out loud with others. Understanding these protocols can help in navigating conversations and expectations in relationships.

💡Man Cave

A 'man cave' is a colloquial term for a private space where a man can relax and engage in activities that interest him, often away from the rest of the household. In the video, it's mentioned that when a man retreats to his 'man cave,' it's important to give him space and not try to 'fix' things, as this can be perceived as intrusive during a time when he needs solitude.

💡Active Listening

Active listening is the practice of fully concentrating, understanding, and responding to a speaker. The video script emphasizes the importance of men listening to women when they have a problem, suggesting that women often just need to be heard and understood, rather than having a problem 'fixed'. This concept is crucial for effective communication and empathy in relationships.

💡Vulnerability

Vulnerability refers to a state of being open to attack or damage, or emotionally exposed. In the context of the video, it's mentioned that men may feel vulnerable when they retreat to their 'man cave,' and it's important for their partners to recognize this vulnerability and give them space. Understanding vulnerability can foster empathy and support in relationships.

💡Real Steve Rohr

Real Steve Rohr appears to be the name of an expert or author mentioned in the video script, who likely specializes in communication and relationships. The script suggests that viewers can find more information or resources on his website, indicating that he is a source of knowledge on the topics discussed in the video.

Highlights

Men and women communicate differently, and understanding these differences is crucial for effective communication.

Men typically approach each other from an angle or the side, not head-on, which can be misinterpreted as confrontational by women.

Women tend to approach men from the front, which they see as a normal way to greet someone, but men might perceive it as confrontational.

Men often remember visual details of significant events but may forget the exact date, unlike women who remember the details extensively.

Men are less likely to remember anniversaries due to their focus on mental imagery rather than specific dates.

A study suggests that showing care through activities is enough for men to express their emotions.

Men process thoughts internally before speaking, unlike women who often speak while thinking.

Women process information out loud, seeking input and discussion, which is a part of their decision-making protocol.

Men need personal space or 'man cave' time to process thoughts and feelings, which should be respected.

Women often want to fix problems and be part of the solution, which can be perceived as intrusive by men in need of space.

When a woman has a problem, men should listen attentively without trying to fix it immediately, as women value being heard.

Men's instinct to fix problems can be counterproductive when women simply need empathy and understanding.

Understanding and respecting these communication differences can lead to better relationships and workplace dynamics.

The expert's book can be found at RealSteveRohr.com for further insights on gender communication.