5 lessons from one of the best books I’ve ever read
Summary
TLDRIn this video, the speaker shares transformative life lessons from Derek Sivers' book, encouraging viewers to explore what they would pursue if not driven by money or attention. Key takeaways include saying 'no' to mediocrity to make room for the extraordinary, embracing a relaxed approach to achieve more with less effort, and recognizing that what's obvious to us can be amazing to others. The speaker also invites viewers to a free alignment workshop and a podcast interview with Sivers for deeper insights.
Takeaways
- 💡 What if you didn't need money or attention? Consider what you would do if you were completely satisfied and didn't seek these external validations.
- 🌟 Explore and journal to find your true interests and desires, moving beyond the default motivations of status, success, money, or security.
- ✋ Learn to say 'no' to mediocrity to make space for opportunities that genuinely excite you, thus empowering your 'yes' with more meaning and impact.
- 🚀 Prioritize quality over quantity in your commitments to focus on what truly matters, leading to more significant achievements and personal satisfaction.
- 🌈 Change your conditions for satisfaction from 'and' to 'or' to appreciate the small wins and feel good about your day, even if not all conditions are met.
- 🚴♂️ Sometimes, less effort can yield similar results, reducing stress and increasing enjoyment in your pursuits.
- 🎨 Recognize that what seems obvious to you might be amazing to others, so don't hold back from sharing your ideas and creations.
- 💭 Be aware that creators often undervalue their own work, so trust that your unique perspective can be valuable to others, even if it feels ordinary to you.
- 📚 Revisit impactful books and lessons to internalize their wisdom and apply them to your life continuously.
- 🔗 Connect with like-minded thinkers and creators, such as Derek Sivers, to gain insights and perspectives that can transform your approach to life and work.
Q & A
What is the main theme of the book discussed in the video?
-The main theme of the book is exploring what one would do if they didn't need money or attention, and how that realization can lead to a more fulfilling and purposeful life.
What does the phrase 'what if you didn't need money or attention' suggest?
-This phrase suggests a thought experiment where one considers their actions and pursuits without the motivations of financial gain or seeking validation from others.
How does the video suggest we approach life if we had 'so much attention and so much praise'?
-The video suggests that if we had an abundance of attention and praise, we might stop doing things for the sake of gaining more and instead focus on what we genuinely want to pursue.
What is the advice given for dealing with the question of what to do with our lives?
-The advice is to do a lot of exploration, try out different things, and use journaling prompts to get away from default motivations like status or success.
What is the significance of the 'Hell yeah' principle mentioned in the video?
-The 'Hell yeah' principle is about saying yes to only those things that genuinely excite and engage you, and saying no to everything else to clear space for what truly matters.
How does the video relate the story of the bike ride to the concept of effort and results?
-The video uses the bike ride story to illustrate that sometimes, putting in less effort and taking a more relaxed approach can yield nearly the same results without the exhaustion.
What is the procrastination hack discussed in the video?
-The procrastination hack is to change the conditions for when you feel it's acceptable to do something from 'and' to 'or', which can lead to more satisfaction and action in life.
Why does the video suggest that creators might feel their ideas are obvious?
-Creators might feel their ideas are obvious because they are so close to their own creations and thoughts that they fail to see the novelty or innovation that others might perceive.
What is the final lesson from the book that the video emphasizes?
-The final lesson is that what may seem obvious to the creator can be amazing to others, encouraging individuals to share their ideas and creations without hesitation.
How does the video suggest we revisit impactful books?
-The video suggests revisiting impactful books to re-engage with lessons that have had a significant impact on us and to recognize that we may still need to internalize those lessons.
Outlines
📚 Lessons from Derek Sivers' Book
The speaker introduces the video by highlighting Derek Sivers as a favorite thinker and shares five key lessons from his book. The lessons focus on the idea of what one would do if not driven by the need for money or attention, prompting viewers to consider their true passions and pursuits once basic needs are met. The speaker emphasizes the importance of exploration and introspection through journaling to discover one's authentic interests beyond societal pressures.
🚫 The Power of Saying No
The speaker discusses the concept of saying 'no' to mediocre opportunities in order to make space for truly exciting and fulfilling ones. By clearing away non-essential commitments, one can focus on what truly matters, leading to more significant achievements. The speaker shares personal anecdotes and advice from successful entrepreneurs about the struggle but necessity of saying no to maintain focus and avoid being overwhelmed by less important tasks.
🚴♂️ Effort vs. Relaxation: A Cycling Analogy
Drawing from personal experience, the speaker contrasts the outcomes of intense, exhausting effort with a more relaxed approach to achieve the same goal. They recount a cycling routine where they realized that by easing up and enjoying the process, they could achieve similar results without the exhaustion, leading to a more sustainable and enjoyable experience. The speaker encourages viewers to reassess their approach to tasks, suggesting that sometimes less effort can yield equally effective results.
🔄 Changing 'And' to 'Or': A Life Satisfaction Hack
The speaker introduces a life hack for increasing satisfaction by changing the mental rules that govern one's sense of accomplishment. By shifting from a mindset that requires multiple conditions to be met ('and') to one that allows for satisfaction when any single condition is met ('or'), individuals can experience more good days and feel more content with their achievements. The speaker illustrates this with a story about organizing a desk and the different ways it can be perceived as orderly or chaotic.
🌟 Sharing the Obvious: Perceptions of Creativity
The speaker reflects on the common experience of creators where their own work seems obvious to them, but can be perceived as brilliant and innovative by others. They discuss the importance of sharing one's ideas and creations without fear of judgment, as what may seem mundane to the creator can be insightful and inspiring to others. The speaker encourages viewers to overcome self-doubt and share their work, drawing from their own experiences with starting a YouTube channel and the impact of Derek Sivers' advice.
Mindmap
Keywords
💡Money
💡Attention
💡Exploration
💡Hell Yeah
💡Saying No
💡Relaxation
💡Effort
💡Procrastination Hack
💡Satisfaction
💡Obvious to You, Amazing to Others
Highlights
The idea of feeling completely satisfied with attention and money and what it might lead you to do differently.
Exploring the question of what you would pursue if you didn't need money or attention.
The importance of doing a lot of exploration and using journaling prompts to discover your true interests.
The concept of saying 'no' to mediocrity to make space for great opportunities.
The power of saying 'no' to make your 'yes' more meaningful and impactful.
The struggle of entrepreneurs in learning to say 'no' to maintain focus on important tasks.
The realization that sometimes less effort can lead to similar results without exhaustion.
The personal experience of biking at a relaxed pace versus full intensity and the surprising outcomes.
The insight that sometimes we mistake unnecessary stress for effort.
The advice to change your conditions for satisfaction from 'and' to 'or' to improve life satisfaction.
The story of changing conditions for satisfaction from a Tony Robbins event.
The idea that what is obvious to you can be amazing to others and the importance of sharing your creations.
The impact of realizing that everyone's ideas seem obvious to them, encouraging creators to share their work.
The advice to revisit impactful books to internalize lessons that may still be needed in your life.
The invitation to join a free quarterly alignment workshop for personal reflection and goal setting.
The suggestion to change the mindset of conditions for satisfaction to improve daily life experience.
Transcripts
hey friends welcome back to the channel
so this is a very very short small book
which I read a few years ago and Derek
cers is one of my favorite people
favorite thinkers in the world and the
advice that he shares has resonated with
me so much over the years and so in this
video I want to share five excerpts Five
Lessons From this book that I am
continuing to revisit again and again
and I hope you enjoy it what if you
didn't need money or attention you know
that feeling you have after a big meal
when you're so full that you don't want
anything more ever wonder what that
would feel like in other parts of your
life we do so many things for the
attention to feel important or praised
but what if you had so much attention
and so much praise that you couldn't
possibly want anymore what would you do
then what would you stop doing we do so
many things for the money whether we
need it or not but what if you had so
much money that you couldn't possibly
want anymore what would you do then what
would you stop doing and then if you
stopped doing all those things you're
doing just for the money or the
attention what would be left who would
you be if you didn't do these things
if you were completely satisfied then
what after an understandable period of
relaxing what would you pursue don't say
sit around and do nothing because that's
still just relaxing I mean after that
when you're ready to be useful to others
again what would you do then if you
didn't need the money and didn't need
the attention yeah this question of what
we want to do with our time what we want
to do with our lives is one of the
central questions that we're all trying
to answer mostly when we're when we get
into our 20s often when we graduate and
we're like H what I do now um it's a
really tricky one and one of the best
things I found for this is to just sort
of do a lot of exploration try out a
bunch of different things and see what
Vibes but also journaling prompts like
this questions like this that encourage
us to get away from like the default
things of status or success or desire
for money or desire for security all
that kind of stuff a question like what
would you actually do if you didn't care
about the money and you didn't care
about the attention next up we have if
you're not feeling saying Hell yeah then
say no most of us have lives filled with
mediocrity we say yes to things that we
felt half-hearted about so we're too
busy to react when opportunities come
our way we miss out on the great because
we're busy with the mediocre the
solution is to say yes to less if you're
not feeling hell yeah that would be
awesome about something say no it's an
easier decision say no to almost
everything this starts to free your time
and your mind then when you find
something you're actually excited about
you'll have the space in your life to
give it your full attention you'll be
able to take Massive Action in a way
that most people can't because you
cleared away your clutter in advance
saying no makes your yes more powerful
though it's good to say yes when you're
starting out wanting any opportunity or
needing variety it's bad to say yes when
you're overwhelmed overcommitted or need
to focus refuse almost everything do
almost nothing but the things you do do
them all the way man this is good this
is a lesson I keep on needing to relearn
and relearn and relearn and relearn and
every entrepreneur that I look up to
also worries also really really really
struggles with this lesson where when
you when you're just starting out you
kind of want to say yes to everything
because you're getting all these
opportunities and you're like you want
to you want to try different things you
want to take advantage of all the things
but then at a certain point you kind of
know what you need to do you know what
the things that you want to focus on
actually are and any deviation or
distraction from those things just
scatters you in a bunch of different
directions and you end up not really
making any meaningful progress but that
requires the ability to say no to stuff
was it there was a famous writer I can't
remember who it was who said that one of
the sad things about one of the
unfortunate side effects of being a
successful writer is that you start
getting all this fan mail and if you
were to respond to the fan mail you
would never have any time to do the
writing and one thing a lot of writers
get into into the into trouble with is
that they're in spending too much time
interacting interacting with the fans
because they view that as a good thing
and they really want to do it they then
lose the focus from their work there's a
phrase in business which is that sevens
kill businesses this is like seven out
of tens 7 out of 10 people 7 out of 10
projects things that you said yes to
because it was like a 7 out of 10
exciting if it's only a 7 out of 10
exciting it's not worth doing and
actually those seven out of 10 like it's
easy to say no to the things that are
three out of 10 or 2 out of 10 or 1 out
of 10 it's easy to say no to the stuff
that you just really don't want to do
but it's a lot harder to to say no to
the stuff where it's like H you know
that's that thing's pretty good but h i
mean maybe it's a 7 out of 10 but I
probably should do it anyway cuz I'm
really lucky to be in this position and
I should take it on and it'll be good
for my CV and it'll help me with this
and this this and that and then before
you know it your calendar and your to-do
list are absolutely rammed and you're
feeling overwhelmed cuz you just have
too much stuff going on and then the
stuff that actually moves the needle cuz
those seven out of 10 things never
really move the needle the stuff that
actually moves the needle Falls by the
wayside oh and by the way if you happen
to be watching this before the 20th of
September 2024 then you might like to
join my completely free quarterly
alignment Workshop this is a totally
free online Workshop I host on Zoom
about every 3 months and the idea is
that we reflect on your last 3 months we
align to your life vision and we set
your goals for the final quarter of the
year I've been hosting these every few
months or year and there's always
thousands of people on the call and they
find them super helpful and it's
completely free so if you want to sign
up and join me facilitating a zoom
session then you can check out the link
in the video description ah I love this
one relax for the same result a few
years ago I lived in Santa Monica
California right on the beach there's a
great bike path that goes along the
ocean for 7 and 1/2 miles on weekday
afternoons it's almost empty it's
perfect for going full speed so a few
times a week I'd get on my bike and go
as fast as I could for the 15m loop I
mean really fullon 100% head down
red-faced sprinting I'd finished
exhausted and look at the time 43
minutes every time after a few months I
noticed I was getting less enthusiastic
about this bike ride I think I'd
mentally linked it with being completely
exhausted so one day I decided I would
do the same ride but just chill take it
easy nice and slow and ah what a nice
ride I was relaxed and smiling and
looking around I was barely giving it
any effort I saw two dolphins in the
water a pelican flew right over me in
Marina del re when I looked up to say
wow he in my mouth I had to laugh
at the novelty of it I'm usually so damn
driven always doing everything as
intensely as I can it was so nice to
take it easy for once I felt I could do
this forever without any exhaustion when
I finished I looked at the time 45
minutes wait what how could that be yep
I double checked 45 minutes as compared
to my usual 43 so apparently all of that
exhausting red-faced full-on push push
push I had been doing had given me only
a 4% boost I could just take it easy and
get 96% of the results and what a
difference in experience to go the same
distance in about the same time but one
way leaves me exhausted and the other
way rejuvenated when I noticed that I'm
all stressed out about something or
driving myself to exhaustion I remember
that bike ride and try dialing back my
effort by 50% it's been amazing how
often everything gets done just as well
and just as fast with what feels like
half the effort which then makes me
realize that half of my effort wasn't
effort at all but just unnecessary
stress that made me feel like I was
doing my best
man love that so good 43 versus 45
minutes I I first I remember I first
came across Derk civer stuff in like
2016 when I listened to an episode of
the Tim Ferris show and then binged
everything he'd written and this was one
of the things that stuck out to me so
much what was that 8 years ago sometimes
just putting in a little bit less effort
just taking it a little bit easier
taking a little bit less seriously
ascribing a little bit less importance
to it it's just the thing to do I talk
about this in the first chapter of feel
good productivity which is about play
play is unlocked when we lower the
stakes when we when we take things a
little bit less seriously when we
approach it with a little bit more
lightness and ease cuz a lot of the
resistance and the push and the
discipline and the drive that we put
into stuff a lot of that doesn't
actually help us move any faster or make
our up more efficient it just makes us
feel bad and if we can find a way to
achieve effectively the same thing with
a little bit less effort trying a little
bit less trying trying a little bit less
hard and kind of more like I don't know
going with the flow of the water rather
than trying to push up against the waves
got that kind of thing yeah 43 minutes
versus 45 minutes good stuff
procrastination hack change and to or my
Unwritten condition for when to exercise
was this when it's a nice day and I
finished my work and I haven't just
eaten and I'm feeling energetic but of
course that rarely happens so I wasn't
exercising enough my coach suggested I
change and to or when it's a nice day or
I finished my work or I haven't just
eaten or I'm feeling energetic now I
exercise quite often do you have a list
of conditions you need to have met
before you do something try changing and
to or I Vibe with this not because it's
a hack for procrastination I Vibe with
this because it's a great hack for being
more satisfied with life I came across
this in a Tony Robbins event actually
there was a story that he told there's a
little girl and she goes to her dad's
office and the girl says to the dad
daddy why is everything always in a
muddle and then the Daddy's like what do
you mean honey what do you mean
everything's all in a muddle and she
says like your desk Daddy have a look at
your desk your desk is a model and so
the dad's like huh so help help me sort
it out like what would it look like if
it wasn't a model and so the girl says
okay well this should go here and this
should go here and this should go here
and the computer should go here and the
thing should go here and then after sort
of meticulously organizing his desk she
says Ah see it's not a muddle anymore
and then he takes the mug of pens or
whatever and moves it there and she's
like no no no it's in audle and she puts
it back then he takes the camera or
whatever on his desk
and he puts it there and she says no no
no it's in a muddle again and puts the
camera back then he takes the coffee cup
the used coffee cup and he puts it there
and she's like no no no it's in a muddle
and she puts it back and so the dad says
oh that's very interesting there are all
sorts of different ways for the desk to
be in a mdle but only one way for the
desk to be acceptable for the desk to be
good back in the day I used to have a
set of rules for myself like Unwritten
rules rules that I hadn't really
acknowledged for when I was allowed to
feel satisfied when I've attended all my
lectures and I had a good night's sleep
and I did some socializing and I
finished one of my essays way ahead of
time and because I had this list of
conditions this list of rules that had
and in in between them I was almost
never satisfied at the end of the day I
always felt like I could have been more
productive I felt like I hadn't done
enough one thing that Derek suggests in
this thing one thing Tony Robbins
recommends is when it comes to the rules
that you have for feeling good change
and to or so it's a good day when I've
gone to all my lectures or I've had a
good night's sleep or I've socialized
with someone or I've made some progress
on my essay and changing and toor in one
simple mindset shift completely
transforms our experience of life it's
just about changing the set of rules
that we have for ourselves if there are
100 different ways for things to be in a
muddle and only one way for things to be
perfect if there's only one way for you
to have a good day but 100 different
ways for for the day to be bad you're
probably going to have a lot of bad days
but if you changed the rules if you
changed the set of rules so that it was
easier for you to have a good day easier
for to be satisfied with what you've
done then you still do the same stuff
it's just that you choose to feel more
satisfied at the end of the day with
what you've done all right final thing
from the book is obvious to you amazing
to others any creator of anything knows
this feeling you experience someone
else's Innovative work it's beautiful
brilliant breathtaking you're stunned
their ideas are unexpected and
surprising but perfect you think I never
would have thought of that how do they
even come up with that it's genius
afterwards you think my ideas are so
obvious I'll never be as inventive as
that I get this feeling often amazing
books music movies or even amazing
conversations I'm in awe at how the
Creator thinks like that I'm humbled but
I continue to do my work I tell my
little Tales I share my point of view
nothing spectacular just my ordinary
thoughts one day someone emailed me and
said I never would have thought of that
how did you even come up with it that's
Genius of course I disagreed and
explained why it was nothing special but
afterwards I realized something
surprisingly profound everybody's ideas
seem obvious to them hit songwriters
often admit that their most successful
hit song was one they thought was just
stupid even not worth recording we're
clearly bad judges of our own Creations
we should just put them out there and
let the world decide are you holding
back something that seems too obvious to
share this was one of the things that
really helped me start my YouTube
channel I think I discovered derk's Serv
was before then or like around around
the time where at a certain point I felt
like ah you know this this advice I'm
giving about getting into med school
this like I don't know study tip I'm sh
ing the stuff around like how I take
notes on my iPad H it's all it's all
obvious then I read this thing what's
obvious to you can be amazing to others
I often like to revisit books that have
had a big impact on me because I like to
revisit the same lessons that had an
impact on me and I realize holy I
still need to I still need to take that
lesson I have not yet like internalized
the lesson that what's obvious to you
can be amazing to others I still hold
myself back from creating stuff from
publishing things posting stuff on my
newsletter Life notes you can subscribe
down below if you want by the way it's a
weekly email that I send weekly-ish with
like notes from books I'm reading
podcast I'm listening to that kind of
stuff I still hold myself back from
putting stuff in there cuz it feels too
obvious I'm like oh everyone's read
hello everyone's read finite and
infinite games everyone's read books by
Daniel pink oh it's not worth putting
the thing in sometimes I I'll send an
issue from the archives one that I wrote
like 5 years ago where I'm like yeah I
discovered this thing 5 years ago but
here it is now and I'll get emails being
like whoa I've never heard of that thing
and to me it's obvious cuz I discovered
it 5 years ago and I've been applying it
to my life but we're getting dozens of
emails from people being like holy
I've never heard this thing before well
it's obvious to you can be amazing to
others you should definitely check out
this book it is I think available for
free on Derrik cers website I'll put a
link down below and also if you like
drik cers and you and you Vibe with his
stuff I'll put a link over here to an
interview I did with Derek on my deep
dive podcast you can check that out
loads of people have said that that
interview really changed their
perspective of life and stuff so I'll
put a link over there thank you so much
for watching and I'll see you next time
bye-bye
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