How To Detach | How To Master Detachment & Let Go Of People & Situations
Summary
TLDRIn this video, Justin J discusses the importance of detachment in personal growth. He emphasizes the need for a self-driven plan and the healthiness of being 'selfish' by prioritizing one's needs and goals. Justin advises viewers to let go of toxic relationships and attachments that hinder their progress, suggesting that success and fulfillment come from within when one is emotionally and mentally independent. He encourages viewers to love themselves, be leaders in their own lives, and focus on personal growth rather than external validation.
Takeaways
- đ Detachment is crucial for personal growth and achieving goals; it means letting go of people and situations that don't serve you.
- đ€ Having a clear plan for oneself is essential to navigate through life and make decisions that align with one's goals, rather than being influenced by others.
- đȘ It's healthy to be 'selfish' in the sense of prioritizing one's needs and desires, as it helps in focusing on personal development.
- đȘ Recognizing when relationships, including family and romantic ones, are no longer beneficial and having the courage to move on is part of self-care.
- đ¶ââïž Detachment becomes easier when you're seeing progress in your life and understand that your journey is about personal growth, not pleasing others.
- đĄ Self-love and confidence are foundational to not being overly attached to external validation or the opinions of others.
- đ Understanding one's identity and purpose helps in making decisions that are in line with personal goals, rather than being swayed by attachments.
- đ« Avoiding the comparison trap and focusing on personal achievements rather than others' success is key to maintaining a healthy mindset.
- đ Not being attached to the outcome of efforts allows for consistent work and eventual success, as the focus shifts to the process rather than the result.
- đ Recognizing and detaching from unhealthy habits or lifestyles, such as drug use, is part of taking control of one's life and making positive changes.
- đ€ Cutting ties with people who do not contribute positively to one's life is necessary for progress, even if they may reappear once success is achieved.
Q & A
What is the main theme of Justin J's video?
-The main theme of Justin J's video is about the importance of detachment from people and situations that do not serve one's personal growth and purpose.
Why does Justin J emphasize the need for a plan?
-Justin J emphasizes the need for a plan because it helps individuals to know where they are going and understand that not everyone can come along with them, thus making detachment easier.
What does Justin J suggest is healthy to be selfish for?
-Justin J suggests that it is healthy to be selfish for one's own needs, desires, and what one wants out of life, as it helps in making better decisions about who to include in one's life.
What does Justin J mean by 'people develop an attachment to others when they don't know who they are'?
-Justin J means that individuals who lack self-awareness and self-identity often become overly attached to others, using them as a crutch for their own sense of self.
What is the right time to walk away from a woman according to Justin J?
-The right time to walk away from a woman, according to Justin J, is when she no longer serves the man's mission or purpose in life and is not contributing positively to it.
Why does Justin J believe that detachment comes easy when one is getting results?
-Justin J believes that detachment comes easy when one is getting results because the focus shifts from the need for external validation to the satisfaction of personal achievements and progress.
What does Justin J suggest is the problem with being attached to the outcome of things?
-Justin J suggests that being attached to the outcome of things can hinder progress because it creates anxiety and prevents individuals from focusing on the consistent effort required to achieve their goals.
What advice does Justin J give regarding dealing with vice such as drugs?
-Justin J advises that individuals should not get caught up in a lifestyle that is not good for them, like drugs, and instead focus on their own path and purpose, making choices that align with their goals.
How does Justin J define the concept of 'detach to attract'?
-Justin J defines 'detach to attract' as the idea that by detaching from unhealthy attachments and focusing on oneself, individuals can attract positive outcomes and opportunities into their lives.
What is Justin J's perspective on the importance of self-love and self-respect?
-Justin J believes that self-love and self-respect are crucial because they form the foundation for a healthy relationship with oneself, which in turn is necessary for being good to others and not getting attached to people who may not reciprocate the same level of care.
What does Justin J suggest as a strategy for not getting emotionally attached to others?
-Justin J suggests developing emotional intelligence, understanding one's feelings, and not acting out of emotions but rather using them to inform decisions and actions.
Why does Justin J compare a leader to someone who detaches from those not contributing to their growth?
-Justin J compares a leader to someone who detaches from non-contributing individuals because a leader must make tough decisions for the betterment of the team or company, just as one should in their personal life to ensure continued growth and success.
What does Justin J mean by 'you are the drug, bottle yourself up and sell it'?
-Justin J uses this phrase to encourage individuals to value their own worth and uniqueness, suggesting that they should focus on self-improvement and self-promotion rather than seeking validation from others.
Outlines
đ Detaching for Personal Growth
In this paragraph, Justin J discusses the importance of detaching from people and situations that do not serve one's personal growth. He emphasizes the need for a plan and self-reliance, stating that being 'selfish' in terms of focusing on one's own needs and desires is healthy. He touches on the idea that people often struggle to detach because they lack a clear direction in life. Justin also addresses the topic of relationships, suggesting that when a woman no longer contributes positively to a man's life mission, it may be time to let go. The paragraph concludes with a call to focus on personal identity and self-love as a foundation for all other attachments.
đĄ Overcoming Attachments and Victim Mentality
This paragraph delves into the reasons why individuals might attach themselves to negative outcomes or lifestyles, such as drugs or toxic relationships. Justin J encourages listeners to break free from a victim mentality and to take control of their lives by making better choices. He stresses the importance of self-advice and listening to one's own inner voice. The speaker also talks about the phenomenon of people returning once one achieves success, highlighting the importance of staying true to one's path and not being swayed by the opinions of others. The paragraph ends with a reflection on the power of detachment and self-focus as a means to attract positive outcomes.
đ Self-Love and Emotional Detachment
Justin J emphasizes the necessity of self-love and a healthy relationship with oneself as a prerequisite for being good to others. He argues against emotional attachment to people who do not reciprocate positive feelings and discusses the importance of being a leader in one's own life, making tough decisions for personal growth. The paragraph also addresses the need for long-term planning and having a vision for the future, which can help one navigate through life's challenges without being derailed by temporary setbacks. Justin encourages viewers to let go of people who do not contribute to their journey and to focus on self-improvement and achieving one's goals.
đ Detachment Leads to Attraction
In the final paragraph, Justin J wraps up his thoughts on detachment by illustrating how letting go of unhealthy attachments can lead to attracting positive experiences and people into one's life. He speaks about the power of success and how achieving small wins can fuel further success, clarifying one's path and purpose. The speaker also touches on the idea of individuality and the importance of not dimming one's light by attaching to others who do not value it. He concludes with a motivational note to be true to oneself, to be the 'drug' that others seek, and to maintain a strong sense of self, which is the key to shining bright in life.
Mindmap
Keywords
đĄDetachment
đĄPlan
đĄSelfishness
đĄIdentity
đĄResults
đĄAttachment
đĄVice
đĄOutcome
đĄEmotions
đĄIndividuality
đĄSuccess
Highlights
The key to detachment is having a plan for yourself and knowing where you're going.
It is healthy to be selfish and prioritize your own needs and desires over others who don't serve your purpose.
Detachment from people becomes easier when you are getting results and focusing on your path and purpose.
Attachments to others often stem from not knowing who you are and what you truly need.
People often get attached to outcomes, but success comes from focusing on the process and putting in consistent work.
A leader must know when it's time to let go of people who are not contributing to the mission.
In life, you always have options, and detachment from toxic situations allows for better choices.
Emotional intelligence is key; understand and manage your emotions rather than being driven by them.
When you detach from societal expectations and focus on your own goals, you start attracting what you truly want.
Success and fulfillment come from following your true path, not from seeking validation or status.
Healthy detachment means understanding that not everyone can come along with you on your journey.
Building a strong relationship with yourself is crucial to avoid unhealthy attachments to others.
Adopt a mindset of detachment to avoid compromising your mission and to attract success.
When you stop being emotionally invested in outcomes, you start achieving consistent results.
Detachment allows you to shine bright as an individual without being dimmed by others who don't add value.
Transcripts
what's good guys it's your boy Justin J
coming to you with another car video
Let's cook boys let's cook all right how
to detach how to master Detachment and
let go of people and situations that
don't serve you you don't owe them
anything I got a request to do this
video I think a week ago and I was
sitting on this video and I was really
thinking about it how what angle I'm
going to attack it from the only option
that I came up with is to be brutally
honest
Okay the reason why people have a hard
time detaching from other people a woman
a toxic family member a friend whoever
right is because you have no plan
because your plan comes before
everything
else this is going to be a big brother
talk when you have a plan for yourself
you know where you're going you
understand that not everybody can come
along with
you when I tell you guys it is healthy
to be selfish it is healthy to worry
about your needs your desires what you
want out of life a lot of people are
outside Lolly gagging and playing games
but your life can be over like this
tomorrow so why do you move around with
people allow people into your space and
vicinity that have no business being
there because you feel like you owe them
something well don't you owe everything
to
yourself some people have kids don't you
want your kids to be proud of who you
are but that's only going to come along
from following your path and purpose
people are going to fall
off let's talk about women too because
the title of this video could have went
a bunch of different ways when's the
right time to walk away from somebody I
got a request for that too we'll get to
that in here as well the right time to
walk away from a woman is when it
doesn't serve you anymore when this
woman is not helping you on the mission
making things easier if she's not
helping she has to
go women are everywhere women are not
the goal your plan your path your
purpose that is the goal see people
develop an attachment to others when
they don't know who they are so you will
be attached to a woman and suddenly she
becomes a part of your identity when she
leaves you don't know what to do with
yourself your whole mission feels like
it's been compromised because now you're
taking a detour but you should have just
stayed on the path that you originally
set for
yourself detaching from people is going
to come easy when you're getting results
and you don't want your results to stop
but see the thing is a lot of people are
on a certain path to get results in this
way I'm going to do this so I can get
more girls I'm going to do this so I can
achieve more status I'm going to do this
so I can get more money as soon as you
get all that stuff what's
left because you're not doing it for a
greater good you're doing it for a bunch
of wants that aren't even
needs what do you need what makes you
wake up and feel alive you pay attention
to that and I guarantee you it's not
women it's not money and it's not
status but when you know who you are and
you're confident and you look in the
mirror you love yourself you're coming
up with new ideas new ways to reinvent
yourself all the time it's
endless you know what path you're
supposed to be on you know it so yeah
does it feel nice to have a chick to you
know lay up next to at night yeah it
feels good but is that what you need to
feel to feel fulfilled no it's
not let's be real with this stuff here's
another thing I want to talk about in
this video too the attachment to
comparing yourselves to others or
feeling like you need to speak on others
that are doing the same thing as you but
you're trying to get ahead no you focus
on your own results if you're a dope ass
dude you have no time to be attaching
yourself to somebody else or a bunch of
somebody else's that you think
are in a higher position than you no do
the work get the
results do the work get the
results a lot of people are attached to
the outcome of things here's the thing
when you're not attached to the outcome
of things you just start doing you start
getting results isn't that strange how
that
works when you say this is going to
happen no matter how it happens the only
thing that needs to be done on my end is
the
consistency putting in the work day in
and day
out it's going to happen the outcome
it's going to happen I don't have to
worry about oh if it's going to happen
this fast or if it's going to happen
this way or that way no no no it's going
to happen all I need to do is put in the
work keep my head down and
grind let's talk about Vice is
drugs people get caught up in a
lifestyle that they know is no good for
for
them they're attaching themselves to
something maybe to fit in maybe to look
cool maybe because they feel as though
that's the only way they know how to
make it out but that's not true in life
we all have
options either you're going to move left
or you're going to move right but that's
up to
you and the reason why people attach
themselves to a a certain type of
outcome is because you don't want to
listen to yourself take your own
advice guys have to get rid of that
victim mentality well this isn't going
to work if I do this and this isn't
going to work no no no no see you're
connecting yourself to the outcome when
the outcome should be I'm going to make
it no matter how it goes if I fall I get
back up if I fall I get back up again
but it's going to happen so if I know
it's going to happen regardless why am I
so attached to if things can go wrong
and what if this person doesn't like me
and blah blah blah blah blah no and
another thing people in your life that
aren't benefiting your life you have to
get rid of you have to get rid of
because those people are not helping you
along your journey in your path but the
funny thing about it is once you make it
they will be right at your
door they will come back
around hoping that you still have that
little attachment to
them but by then you know
better yo Detachment is the game Cher
because this is exactly why I give the
advice that I do because I practice it
in my everyday life when you walk into a
situation you think this person's going
to realize I'm a dope ass person because
I'm a dope ass person I don't have to
convince them of anything and I don't
have to change their mind because I'm
the
opportunity somebody comes to you and
they're trying to show you that they're
worthy okay well they have to show you
you don't just give them all this
validation up front put them on a
pedestal make them feel special for what
you're the
opportunity are they trying to get
attached to you or are you trying to get
attached to them see this is how it
works too when you detach from
everything society's BS what people
think about you when you stop caring and
you worry about what you want for
yourself you seem to start attracting
everything it's crazy how that works I
remember I was busting my ass working
damn near 70 hours I always speak on
that story 70 hours working two jobs had
no time for myself had no time to date
had no time to really do too much of
anything besides work out and do it all
over again it was Groundhog's Day and I
was trying my hardest to get money but
you know when I said I bet there's
something I could do that I'm really
into that I never really viewed as a way
to make money I've been doing this for
free my whole life and I flipped the
script I said all the hours that you
were paying attention to that outcome
yeah you needed to do that at the time
but if you really cared about the
outcome you would still be working those
same hours you would still be grinding
because that was the only way you knew
how remember what I said before we
always have choices so when I said you
know what don't worry about that outcome
because the greater outcome of my life
is going to be something more conducive
it's going to be something better that I
can capitalize off of and look where I'm
at
today
I have choices you have choices if you
think you're stuck in one box here or
you're stuck in a rut no you can always
help yourself there is light in
darkness there's light in darkness in
relationships when a relationship has to
end it has to end one day your life is
going to end it has to
end you know when you're eating a plate
of food and you're like damn that was
good I wish I could have it again if
you're not going to get up and make it
again it's over it's the same thing all
around the board see people are too
invested in their emotions yet they're
not emotionally intelligent because they
go off of emotions it's okay to feel a
certain way understand it write it down
capitalize off of it flip the script use
it to help you but when people use their
emotions to just further sink into a
sunken place it never seems to work out
so what's the opposite of
that detach yourself from the emotions
stand on the other side it's kind of
like having an outer body experience
when you step outside of yourself and
you're literally watching yourself it
feels like you're watching
yourself I've sat back and I've
meditated and I thought about that
different scenarios that I've been in
and different situations that I put
myself in and I sat back and actually
looked at myself I looked like a
fool way too many situations where I let
my emotions take over where I got
attached to somebody that really didn't
even care about me but I was too blind
to see it because I was blind
myself I always sit back and think about
past mistakes or situations I put myself
through and that's what helps me not go
through them
again but see a lot of the things that
guys wish for will end up being mistakes
but they don't see it that way because
they're following a trend they're
following they're following what the
next person is doing thinking that oh
this is the way to go yeah go that way
you're going to quickly see that it's a
mistake and it's only until you make
that mistake and correct it that it
doesn't happen again how do you think
I'm sitting here telling you what I'm
telling you
[Music]
when I say love yourself I don't think
enough people get it man you got to have
a healthy relationship with yourself to
even then be good for other people so
you can never get attached to somebody
else if you're not good for
yourself a woman should never be able to
make you feel bad about yourself I
really want to talk about this because
that's mostly where I got the request
you know for this video the the video
was when is it the right time to walk
away from somebody how do you detach
emotionally from somebody listen if your
life isn't where you want it to be I'm
sorry to tell you but you're using women
to fill a void you're supposed to be a
leader okay one thing about being a
leader is if somebody's not doing their
job if they're not helping the company
grow we have to replace them with
somebody else who's more qualified and
fit to do the job no but the reason why
you don't think that way is because
you're relying on this person to make
you feel good about yourself you're not
being a leader
you're not being a leader a leader has
to show up strong in the situation every
day and direct people give directions
and when it's time for things to end
it's time for things to end it's like a
book when a chapter closes another one
starts it's very simple to understand
you need to see where you're going to be
at in your life a lot of dudes don't
have a one-year plan a 2-year plan a
three-year plan a 4-year plan a 5-year
plan you need to have those plans
because when all else fails you still
have that plan see a bunch of potholes
in the road can come up bumps in the
road problems can you know come up and
arise but here's the thing you already
have a plan 5 years ahead from now 10
years ahead from now so it doesn't
matter when bad things happen the goal
the ultimate goal the end game is to get
to where you have to get and get what
you came to
get it's not about all the other stuff
and all the small stuff and the
peanuts things are going to happen to
you in your life but where are you going
to be at later in your life this is
something that you should already have
planned I'm telling you if a lot of
dudes had a
plan they would understand that all this
other outside noise means nothing it
means nothing A lot of people are so
emotionally invested in things but when
you have your feelings hurt time and
time and time again till you have no
feelings left to be hurt you start to
understand that my feelings should only
matter to me should be able to you know
craft and mold my feelings and my
emotions and be able to understand them
not act out off of it but understand
them because nine times out of 10 nobody
really cares like that your family
members they love you but see people
always want to give themselves to others
so freely no you have to like yourself
and when you start to like yourself I'm
telling you it's going to come from
having your feelings ultimately broken
down and hurt a bunch of times to the
point where you understand that only
what I think matters if things have to
go it's it's time to let them go you
need to adopt that mindset to actually
win in this world because when you're
out of here you can't take a bunch of
this stuff with you you can act you
can't take anything with
you you cannot take anything with you so
what's your plan what's your path what's
your purpose out here what is it because
once that's clear you understand in
order for me to get there a bunch of
people that don't suit me a bunch of
people that are doing nothing for me
they have to fall off the face of the
map they have to leave they have to go
cuz all they're going to do is slow me
down but if you want those people to
stick around and you have an unhealthy
attachment to them chances are you're
not right with yourself and your mission
can be
compromised should never be compromised
when you detach from things you just
attract everything it's like what we say
in this space don't chase women okay
every dude is going to say that
differently but in every dude's
experience the same thing seems to be
true okay that chick who's really in to
me when I don't try
hard she seems to find her way to me she
seems to always hit me up she seems to
come to me she seems to be eager
whenever she hears from me
right the same thing with doing better
in life once you stop beating yourself
up and actually go out there and put in
the work to get the results suddenly the
universe starts rewarding you with
everything you could lose your job today
and say well I don't have any savings I
don't know what I'm going to do instead
ofay paying attention to the outcome of
falling under you pick yourself up you
get another job you get the results and
now the universe is giving you back more
than you
expected you know that friend that
didn't believe in you you know that
friend that was always taking advantage
of you you cut that person off you just
stick to your guns you keep pushing
forward forward forward all of a sudden
now you're gaining success that same
person comes back around and has a new
respect for you or they're trying to
show you how they changed and they're
apologize iing see how that works when
you detach you
attract and you can manifest and attract
whatever you want in your life but the
thing is you have to put in the work day
in and day
out getting attached to things getting
attached to people and situations that
aren't good for you it's never going to
do anything but I'm telling you once you
detach and you start getting wins and
stacking W's as I say and gaining
success and you see your path even
clearer and you understand here the
thing about success in W's once you
start getting them it only fuels you to
go get more it only makes your path and
purpose
clearer and you go out and you solidify
it everything becomes clear when you
detach when you're addicted to yourself
remember when I say you are the drug
bottle yourself up and sell it you are
the CEO the LLC the brand the whole show
you are him they are them that's exactly
what I mean by that you are are attached
to yourself you're not attached to the
outcome you're attached to you being
that dope solid
dude never let anybody dim your light
bro cuz that's what's going to happen
when that's what's going to tend to
happen when you attach yourself to
people that could care less all they're
going to do is dim your light and you
were born to shine bright you were born
to
shine everybody's greatest gift is being
an individual their
individuality the problem is too many
people attach themselves to others and
they lose their
shine don't dim your light detach to
attract hope you guys got a lot out of
this video it's your boy Justin J get
with you boys in the next video like
comment subscribe let's go
boys let's go
Voir Plus de Vidéos Connexes
Masculine Identity | Why Men Must Be Comfortable Being Alone
Desexualizing Your Brain Is A Cheat Code
Self Improvement Tips For Men | How To Improve As A Man
you can be anything, choose wisely
Your Life Experience molds Who you are.
5 STOIC Rules on How To Emotionally DETACH from Someone | Marcus Aurelius Stoicism
5.0 / 5 (0 votes)