Why Women Overlook You & How To Fix It

Summary

In this video, Courtney Ryan shares insightful advice on how men can improve their attractiveness by making subtle, yet impactful changes in their behavior and lifestyle. She discusses seven key areas where many men unknowingly fall short, including settling into unhealthy routines, projecting passive energy, being emotionally one-dimensional, seeking approval, talking more than listening, misreading tension, and having a life on hold. Courtney emphasizes the importance of being intentional, present, dynamic, and grounded to shift how women perceive you, ultimately boosting confidence and connection.

Takeaways

• 😀 Women notice men who put effort into their health, grooming, and style. It's not about being a model but about showing standards and self-care.
• 😀 Passive energy can make you appear indecisive or uninterested. Women are attracted to men who show leadership and confidence, even in subtle ways.
• 😀 Emotional variety is key to building attraction. Show different sides of yourself—humor, vulnerability, playfulness, and seriousness.
• 😀 Seeking a woman's approval can make you seem inauthentic. Focus on connecting with her rather than impressing her.
• 😀 Women want to feel heard and understood. Focus on listening actively and engaging with what she says, rather than dominating the conversation.
• 😀 Tension in interactions can be a good thing. Women appreciate men who can stay calm and confident, even during moments of disagreement or discomfort.
• 😀 Live a life with direction and purpose. Women are drawn to men who have their own goals and passions, not those who rely on her to fix their life.
• 😀 Raising the bar for yourself—through activities like going to the gym and cleaning up your space—makes you more attractive without being perfect.
• 😀 Confidence is about being grounded and decisive. Avoid being overly apologetic or trying to eliminate tension entirely in interactions.
• 😀 Authenticity is crucial. Be yourself and stop trying to perform or present a polished version of yourself to impress women.

Q & A

What is the main reason women might overlook men, according to the script?

The main reason women might overlook men is because they are unintentionally sending the wrong signals. It's often not due to being unattractive, but due to subtle behaviors that may go unnoticed.

What does the speaker suggest about 'normal' behaviors in today’s society?

The speaker suggests that today's version of 'normal' is rather uninspiring, with many men neglecting their health, appearance, and overall well-being. Being 'normal' can actually make a man invisible, so standing out by elevating personal standards is more attractive.

How can a man raise his personal standards according to the speaker?

A man can raise his standards by focusing on his health, dressing intentionally, cleaning up his living space, and taking care of his appearance, such as starting a skincare routine.

Why is being assertive in energy important in attracting women?

Being assertive in energy is important because women want to feel that a man knows what he wants and can take action. Passive behavior can be seen as lacking confidence and leadership, which can make a man less attractive.

What does the speaker mean by being emotionally 'one-dimensional'?

Being emotionally 'one-dimensional' means displaying only one emotion, such as always being serious, sarcastic, or polite. This lack of emotional variety can make it hard for women to feel a connection with a man.

What kind of emotional range do women find attractive?

Women find emotional range attractive because it shows depth and adaptability. A man who can shift between humor, vulnerability, playfulness, and seriousness demonstrates confidence and the ability to match or lead a woman’s energy.

What is the problem with focusing too much on earning a woman’s approval?

Focusing too much on earning a woman's approval can make a man seem overly agreeable, fake, and polished. Women are drawn to authenticity, not to someone constantly trying to impress them.

How does the speaker suggest men can improve their listening skills?

Men can improve their listening skills by genuinely tuning in when a woman speaks, remembering details, asking thoughtful follow-up questions, and showing a true interest in what she’s saying. This makes women feel seen and heard.

What does the speaker say about handling tension in a conversation?

The speaker suggests that tension in a conversation is normal and can be attractive if handled well. Instead of panicking or over-explaining, men should stay calm, hold their frame, and respond confidently. This shows emotional strength and poise.

Why is it important for a man to have his own purpose in life?

Having a purpose and direction in life is crucial because women are attracted to men who have their own goals and passions. When a man is living a fulfilling life, it draws women in because they feel like they’re joining a meaningful journey, not rescuing someone.