5 lessons from one of the best books I’ve ever read

Ali Abdaal
3 Sept 202413:48

Summary

TLDRIn this video, the speaker shares transformative life lessons from Derek Sivers' book, encouraging viewers to explore what they would pursue if not driven by money or attention. Key takeaways include saying 'no' to mediocrity to make room for the extraordinary, embracing a relaxed approach to achieve more with less effort, and recognizing that what's obvious to us can be amazing to others. The speaker also invites viewers to a free alignment workshop and a podcast interview with Sivers for deeper insights.

Takeaways

  • 💡 What if you didn't need money or attention? Consider what you would do if you were completely satisfied and didn't seek these external validations.
  • 🌟 Explore and journal to find your true interests and desires, moving beyond the default motivations of status, success, money, or security.
  • ✋ Learn to say 'no' to mediocrity to make space for opportunities that genuinely excite you, thus empowering your 'yes' with more meaning and impact.
  • 🚀 Prioritize quality over quantity in your commitments to focus on what truly matters, leading to more significant achievements and personal satisfaction.
  • 🌈 Change your conditions for satisfaction from 'and' to 'or' to appreciate the small wins and feel good about your day, even if not all conditions are met.
  • 🚴‍♂️ Sometimes, less effort can yield similar results, reducing stress and increasing enjoyment in your pursuits.
  • 🎨 Recognize that what seems obvious to you might be amazing to others, so don't hold back from sharing your ideas and creations.
  • 💭 Be aware that creators often undervalue their own work, so trust that your unique perspective can be valuable to others, even if it feels ordinary to you.
  • 📚 Revisit impactful books and lessons to internalize their wisdom and apply them to your life continuously.
  • 🔗 Connect with like-minded thinkers and creators, such as Derek Sivers, to gain insights and perspectives that can transform your approach to life and work.

Q & A

  • What is the main theme of the book discussed in the video?

    -The main theme of the book is exploring what one would do if they didn't need money or attention, and how that realization can lead to a more fulfilling and purposeful life.

  • What does the phrase 'what if you didn't need money or attention' suggest?

    -This phrase suggests a thought experiment where one considers their actions and pursuits without the motivations of financial gain or seeking validation from others.

  • How does the video suggest we approach life if we had 'so much attention and so much praise'?

    -The video suggests that if we had an abundance of attention and praise, we might stop doing things for the sake of gaining more and instead focus on what we genuinely want to pursue.

  • What is the advice given for dealing with the question of what to do with our lives?

    -The advice is to do a lot of exploration, try out different things, and use journaling prompts to get away from default motivations like status or success.

  • What is the significance of the 'Hell yeah' principle mentioned in the video?

    -The 'Hell yeah' principle is about saying yes to only those things that genuinely excite and engage you, and saying no to everything else to clear space for what truly matters.

  • How does the video relate the story of the bike ride to the concept of effort and results?

    -The video uses the bike ride story to illustrate that sometimes, putting in less effort and taking a more relaxed approach can yield nearly the same results without the exhaustion.

  • What is the procrastination hack discussed in the video?

    -The procrastination hack is to change the conditions for when you feel it's acceptable to do something from 'and' to 'or', which can lead to more satisfaction and action in life.

  • Why does the video suggest that creators might feel their ideas are obvious?

    -Creators might feel their ideas are obvious because they are so close to their own creations and thoughts that they fail to see the novelty or innovation that others might perceive.

  • What is the final lesson from the book that the video emphasizes?

    -The final lesson is that what may seem obvious to the creator can be amazing to others, encouraging individuals to share their ideas and creations without hesitation.

  • How does the video suggest we revisit impactful books?

    -The video suggests revisiting impactful books to re-engage with lessons that have had a significant impact on us and to recognize that we may still need to internalize those lessons.

Outlines

00:00

📚 Lessons from Derek Sivers' Book

The speaker introduces the video by highlighting Derek Sivers as a favorite thinker and shares five key lessons from his book. The lessons focus on the idea of what one would do if not driven by the need for money or attention, prompting viewers to consider their true passions and pursuits once basic needs are met. The speaker emphasizes the importance of exploration and introspection through journaling to discover one's authentic interests beyond societal pressures.

05:00

🚫 The Power of Saying No

The speaker discusses the concept of saying 'no' to mediocre opportunities in order to make space for truly exciting and fulfilling ones. By clearing away non-essential commitments, one can focus on what truly matters, leading to more significant achievements. The speaker shares personal anecdotes and advice from successful entrepreneurs about the struggle but necessity of saying no to maintain focus and avoid being overwhelmed by less important tasks.

10:00

🚴‍♂️ Effort vs. Relaxation: A Cycling Analogy

Drawing from personal experience, the speaker contrasts the outcomes of intense, exhausting effort with a more relaxed approach to achieve the same goal. They recount a cycling routine where they realized that by easing up and enjoying the process, they could achieve similar results without the exhaustion, leading to a more sustainable and enjoyable experience. The speaker encourages viewers to reassess their approach to tasks, suggesting that sometimes less effort can yield equally effective results.

🔄 Changing 'And' to 'Or': A Life Satisfaction Hack

The speaker introduces a life hack for increasing satisfaction by changing the mental rules that govern one's sense of accomplishment. By shifting from a mindset that requires multiple conditions to be met ('and') to one that allows for satisfaction when any single condition is met ('or'), individuals can experience more good days and feel more content with their achievements. The speaker illustrates this with a story about organizing a desk and the different ways it can be perceived as orderly or chaotic.

🌟 Sharing the Obvious: Perceptions of Creativity

The speaker reflects on the common experience of creators where their own work seems obvious to them, but can be perceived as brilliant and innovative by others. They discuss the importance of sharing one's ideas and creations without fear of judgment, as what may seem mundane to the creator can be insightful and inspiring to others. The speaker encourages viewers to overcome self-doubt and share their work, drawing from their own experiences with starting a YouTube channel and the impact of Derek Sivers' advice.

Mindmap

Keywords

💡Money

Money in the context of the video script symbolizes a common motivator for human actions and a measure of success. It's discussed as something people often strive for, but the video challenges viewers to consider what they would do if they didn't need money. This prompts a reflection on intrinsic motivations and the pursuit of activities for their own sake, rather than for external rewards. The script uses the concept of having 'so much money that you couldn't possibly want anymore' to encourage the audience to think about their true passions and what they would do if financial concerns were removed.

💡Attention

Attention, as used in the script, refers to the social validation or recognition that people often seek. It's tied to the idea of feeling important or praised. The video encourages viewers to ponder what they would do if they had 'so much attention and so much praise that you couldn't possibly want anymore.' This concept is used to explore the idea of doing things for their own fulfillment rather than for the approval of others, suggesting that true satisfaction might come from within rather than from external validation.

💡Exploration

Exploration in the video script is about trying out various activities and experiences to discover one's true interests and passions. It's suggested as a method for answering life's central questions, especially during transitional periods such as post-graduation. The script implies that through exploration, one can encounter different 'vibes' and better understand what truly resonates with them, moving beyond the default pursuits of status, success, money, or security.

💡Hell Yeah

The phrase 'Hell Yeah' in the script is used as a criterion for selecting activities or opportunities that genuinely excite and engage the individual. It contrasts with mediocrity and half-hearted commitments. The video suggests saying 'no' to things that don't elicit a 'Hell Yeah' response, which can free up time and mental space for opportunities that truly matter. This concept is about focusing one's energy and resources on what truly brings joy and fulfillment, leading to more meaningful engagement and 'Massive Action' when the right opportunity arises.

💡Saying No

Saying No in the context of the video is about the power of rejection to protect one's time and energy for what truly matters. It's a strategy to avoid being overwhelmed by mediocre opportunities and to create space for the exceptional. The script uses the idea of 'refusing almost everything' to emphasize the importance of focusing on high-impact activities. It also touches on the challenge of saying no to good opportunities ('7 out of 10') to make room for the great ones.

💡Relaxation

Relaxation in the script is presented as a counterintuitive approach to achieving results. It's illustrated through the story of a bike ride where the speaker realizes that a relaxed, easy effort can yield nearly the same outcome as an exhausting, full-on sprint. This concept challenges the notion that more effort always leads to better results, suggesting that sometimes reducing stress and pressure can lead to more sustainable and enjoyable outcomes.

💡Effort

Effort, as discussed in the video, refers to the amount of energy and work one puts into an activity. The script challenges the assumption that maximum effort always yields the best results, suggesting that unnecessary stress and pressure can be detrimental. It encourages finding a balance where tasks can be accomplished effectively with less effort, leading to a more positive and sustainable approach to work and life.

💡Procrastination Hack

The term 'Procrastination Hack' in the script refers to a strategy to overcome the tendency to delay tasks by changing the conditions under which one allows themselves to perform the task. The video gives an example of changing 'and' to 'or' in the conditions for exercising, which makes it easier to find opportunities to exercise. This hack is also suggested as a way to increase life satisfaction by adjusting the personal rules that govern when one feels satisfied or successful.

💡Satisfaction

Satisfaction in the video script is about the feeling of contentment and fulfillment that comes from achieving one's goals or meeting certain conditions. It's discussed in the context of changing personal rules to make it easier to feel satisfied with one's day or achievements. The script suggests that changing the conditions from 'and' to 'or' can lead to more frequent feelings of satisfaction, as it reduces the barriers to feeling good about one's accomplishments.

💡Obvious to You, Amazing to Others

This phrase encapsulates the idea that what may seem ordinary or obvious to the creator can be surprising and inspiring to others. The video uses this concept to encourage creators to share their work without fear of it being too obvious or unoriginal. It suggests that everyone's perspective is unique, and what seems common to one person can offer fresh insights to another, emphasizing the value of sharing one's ideas and creations.

Highlights

The idea of feeling completely satisfied with attention and money and what it might lead you to do differently.

Exploring the question of what you would pursue if you didn't need money or attention.

The importance of doing a lot of exploration and using journaling prompts to discover your true interests.

The concept of saying 'no' to mediocrity to make space for great opportunities.

The power of saying 'no' to make your 'yes' more meaningful and impactful.

The struggle of entrepreneurs in learning to say 'no' to maintain focus on important tasks.

The realization that sometimes less effort can lead to similar results without exhaustion.

The personal experience of biking at a relaxed pace versus full intensity and the surprising outcomes.

The insight that sometimes we mistake unnecessary stress for effort.

The advice to change your conditions for satisfaction from 'and' to 'or' to improve life satisfaction.

The story of changing conditions for satisfaction from a Tony Robbins event.

The idea that what is obvious to you can be amazing to others and the importance of sharing your creations.

The impact of realizing that everyone's ideas seem obvious to them, encouraging creators to share their work.

The advice to revisit impactful books to internalize lessons that may still be needed in your life.

The invitation to join a free quarterly alignment workshop for personal reflection and goal setting.

The suggestion to change the mindset of conditions for satisfaction to improve daily life experience.

Transcripts

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hey friends welcome back to the channel

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so this is a very very short small book

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which I read a few years ago and Derek

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cers is one of my favorite people

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favorite thinkers in the world and the

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advice that he shares has resonated with

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me so much over the years and so in this

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video I want to share five excerpts Five

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Lessons From this book that I am

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continuing to revisit again and again

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and I hope you enjoy it what if you

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didn't need money or attention you know

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that feeling you have after a big meal

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when you're so full that you don't want

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anything more ever wonder what that

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would feel like in other parts of your

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life we do so many things for the

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attention to feel important or praised

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but what if you had so much attention

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and so much praise that you couldn't

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possibly want anymore what would you do

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then what would you stop doing we do so

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many things for the money whether we

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need it or not but what if you had so

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much money that you couldn't possibly

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want anymore what would you do then what

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would you stop doing and then if you

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stopped doing all those things you're

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doing just for the money or the

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attention what would be left who would

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you be if you didn't do these things

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if you were completely satisfied then

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what after an understandable period of

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relaxing what would you pursue don't say

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sit around and do nothing because that's

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still just relaxing I mean after that

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when you're ready to be useful to others

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again what would you do then if you

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didn't need the money and didn't need

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the attention yeah this question of what

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we want to do with our time what we want

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to do with our lives is one of the

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central questions that we're all trying

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to answer mostly when we're when we get

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into our 20s often when we graduate and

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we're like H what I do now um it's a

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really tricky one and one of the best

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things I found for this is to just sort

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of do a lot of exploration try out a

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bunch of different things and see what

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Vibes but also journaling prompts like

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this questions like this that encourage

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us to get away from like the default

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things of status or success or desire

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for money or desire for security all

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that kind of stuff a question like what

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would you actually do if you didn't care

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about the money and you didn't care

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about the attention next up we have if

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you're not feeling saying Hell yeah then

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say no most of us have lives filled with

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mediocrity we say yes to things that we

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felt half-hearted about so we're too

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busy to react when opportunities come

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our way we miss out on the great because

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we're busy with the mediocre the

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solution is to say yes to less if you're

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not feeling hell yeah that would be

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awesome about something say no it's an

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easier decision say no to almost

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everything this starts to free your time

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and your mind then when you find

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something you're actually excited about

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you'll have the space in your life to

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give it your full attention you'll be

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able to take Massive Action in a way

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that most people can't because you

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cleared away your clutter in advance

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saying no makes your yes more powerful

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though it's good to say yes when you're

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starting out wanting any opportunity or

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needing variety it's bad to say yes when

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you're overwhelmed overcommitted or need

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to focus refuse almost everything do

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almost nothing but the things you do do

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them all the way man this is good this

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is a lesson I keep on needing to relearn

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and relearn and relearn and relearn and

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every entrepreneur that I look up to

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also worries also really really really

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struggles with this lesson where when

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you when you're just starting out you

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kind of want to say yes to everything

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because you're getting all these

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opportunities and you're like you want

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to you want to try different things you

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want to take advantage of all the things

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but then at a certain point you kind of

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know what you need to do you know what

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the things that you want to focus on

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actually are and any deviation or

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distraction from those things just

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scatters you in a bunch of different

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directions and you end up not really

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making any meaningful progress but that

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requires the ability to say no to stuff

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was it there was a famous writer I can't

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remember who it was who said that one of

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the sad things about one of the

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unfortunate side effects of being a

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successful writer is that you start

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getting all this fan mail and if you

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were to respond to the fan mail you

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would never have any time to do the

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writing and one thing a lot of writers

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get into into the into trouble with is

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that they're in spending too much time

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interacting interacting with the fans

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because they view that as a good thing

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and they really want to do it they then

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lose the focus from their work there's a

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phrase in business which is that sevens

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kill businesses this is like seven out

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of tens 7 out of 10 people 7 out of 10

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projects things that you said yes to

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because it was like a 7 out of 10

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exciting if it's only a 7 out of 10

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exciting it's not worth doing and

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actually those seven out of 10 like it's

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easy to say no to the things that are

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three out of 10 or 2 out of 10 or 1 out

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of 10 it's easy to say no to the stuff

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that you just really don't want to do

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but it's a lot harder to to say no to

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the stuff where it's like H you know

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that's that thing's pretty good but h i

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mean maybe it's a 7 out of 10 but I

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probably should do it anyway cuz I'm

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really lucky to be in this position and

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I should take it on and it'll be good

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for my CV and it'll help me with this

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and this this and that and then before

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you know it your calendar and your to-do

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list are absolutely rammed and you're

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feeling overwhelmed cuz you just have

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too much stuff going on and then the

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stuff that actually moves the needle cuz

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those seven out of 10 things never

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really move the needle the stuff that

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actually moves the needle Falls by the

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wayside oh and by the way if you happen

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to be watching this before the 20th of

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September 2024 then you might like to

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join my completely free quarterly

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alignment Workshop this is a totally

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free online Workshop I host on Zoom

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about every 3 months and the idea is

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that we reflect on your last 3 months we

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align to your life vision and we set

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your goals for the final quarter of the

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year I've been hosting these every few

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months or year and there's always

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thousands of people on the call and they

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find them super helpful and it's

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completely free so if you want to sign

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up and join me facilitating a zoom

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session then you can check out the link

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in the video description ah I love this

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one relax for the same result a few

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years ago I lived in Santa Monica

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California right on the beach there's a

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great bike path that goes along the

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ocean for 7 and 1/2 miles on weekday

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afternoons it's almost empty it's

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perfect for going full speed so a few

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times a week I'd get on my bike and go

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as fast as I could for the 15m loop I

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mean really fullon 100% head down

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red-faced sprinting I'd finished

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exhausted and look at the time 43

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minutes every time after a few months I

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noticed I was getting less enthusiastic

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about this bike ride I think I'd

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mentally linked it with being completely

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exhausted so one day I decided I would

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do the same ride but just chill take it

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easy nice and slow and ah what a nice

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ride I was relaxed and smiling and

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looking around I was barely giving it

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any effort I saw two dolphins in the

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water a pelican flew right over me in

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Marina del re when I looked up to say

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wow he in my mouth I had to laugh

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at the novelty of it I'm usually so damn

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driven always doing everything as

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intensely as I can it was so nice to

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take it easy for once I felt I could do

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this forever without any exhaustion when

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I finished I looked at the time 45

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minutes wait what how could that be yep

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I double checked 45 minutes as compared

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to my usual 43 so apparently all of that

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exhausting red-faced full-on push push

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push I had been doing had given me only

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a 4% boost I could just take it easy and

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get 96% of the results and what a

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difference in experience to go the same

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distance in about the same time but one

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way leaves me exhausted and the other

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way rejuvenated when I noticed that I'm

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all stressed out about something or

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driving myself to exhaustion I remember

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that bike ride and try dialing back my

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effort by 50% it's been amazing how

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often everything gets done just as well

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and just as fast with what feels like

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half the effort which then makes me

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realize that half of my effort wasn't

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effort at all but just unnecessary

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stress that made me feel like I was

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doing my best

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man love that so good 43 versus 45

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minutes I I first I remember I first

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came across Derk civer stuff in like

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2016 when I listened to an episode of

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the Tim Ferris show and then binged

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everything he'd written and this was one

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of the things that stuck out to me so

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much what was that 8 years ago sometimes

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just putting in a little bit less effort

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just taking it a little bit easier

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taking a little bit less seriously

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ascribing a little bit less importance

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to it it's just the thing to do I talk

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about this in the first chapter of feel

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good productivity which is about play

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play is unlocked when we lower the

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stakes when we when we take things a

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little bit less seriously when we

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approach it with a little bit more

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lightness and ease cuz a lot of the

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resistance and the push and the

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discipline and the drive that we put

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into stuff a lot of that doesn't

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actually help us move any faster or make

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our up more efficient it just makes us

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feel bad and if we can find a way to

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achieve effectively the same thing with

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a little bit less effort trying a little

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bit less trying trying a little bit less

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hard and kind of more like I don't know

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going with the flow of the water rather

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than trying to push up against the waves

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got that kind of thing yeah 43 minutes

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versus 45 minutes good stuff

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procrastination hack change and to or my

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Unwritten condition for when to exercise

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was this when it's a nice day and I

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finished my work and I haven't just

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eaten and I'm feeling energetic but of

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course that rarely happens so I wasn't

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exercising enough my coach suggested I

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change and to or when it's a nice day or

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I finished my work or I haven't just

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eaten or I'm feeling energetic now I

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exercise quite often do you have a list

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of conditions you need to have met

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before you do something try changing and

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to or I Vibe with this not because it's

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a hack for procrastination I Vibe with

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this because it's a great hack for being

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more satisfied with life I came across

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this in a Tony Robbins event actually

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there was a story that he told there's a

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little girl and she goes to her dad's

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office and the girl says to the dad

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daddy why is everything always in a

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muddle and then the Daddy's like what do

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you mean honey what do you mean

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everything's all in a muddle and she

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says like your desk Daddy have a look at

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your desk your desk is a model and so

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the dad's like huh so help help me sort

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it out like what would it look like if

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it wasn't a model and so the girl says

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okay well this should go here and this

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should go here and this should go here

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and the computer should go here and the

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thing should go here and then after sort

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of meticulously organizing his desk she

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says Ah see it's not a muddle anymore

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and then he takes the mug of pens or

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whatever and moves it there and she's

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like no no no it's in audle and she puts

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it back then he takes the camera or

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whatever on his desk

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and he puts it there and she says no no

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no it's in a muddle again and puts the

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camera back then he takes the coffee cup

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the used coffee cup and he puts it there

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and she's like no no no it's in a muddle

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and she puts it back and so the dad says

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oh that's very interesting there are all

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sorts of different ways for the desk to

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be in a mdle but only one way for the

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desk to be acceptable for the desk to be

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good back in the day I used to have a

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set of rules for myself like Unwritten

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rules rules that I hadn't really

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acknowledged for when I was allowed to

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feel satisfied when I've attended all my

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lectures and I had a good night's sleep

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and I did some socializing and I

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finished one of my essays way ahead of

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time and because I had this list of

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conditions this list of rules that had

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and in in between them I was almost

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never satisfied at the end of the day I

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always felt like I could have been more

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productive I felt like I hadn't done

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enough one thing that Derek suggests in

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this thing one thing Tony Robbins

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recommends is when it comes to the rules

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that you have for feeling good change

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and to or so it's a good day when I've

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gone to all my lectures or I've had a

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good night's sleep or I've socialized

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with someone or I've made some progress

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on my essay and changing and toor in one

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simple mindset shift completely

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transforms our experience of life it's

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just about changing the set of rules

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that we have for ourselves if there are

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100 different ways for things to be in a

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muddle and only one way for things to be

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perfect if there's only one way for you

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to have a good day but 100 different

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ways for for the day to be bad you're

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probably going to have a lot of bad days

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but if you changed the rules if you

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changed the set of rules so that it was

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easier for you to have a good day easier

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for to be satisfied with what you've

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done then you still do the same stuff

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it's just that you choose to feel more

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satisfied at the end of the day with

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what you've done all right final thing

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from the book is obvious to you amazing

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to others any creator of anything knows

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this feeling you experience someone

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else's Innovative work it's beautiful

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brilliant breathtaking you're stunned

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their ideas are unexpected and

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surprising but perfect you think I never

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would have thought of that how do they

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even come up with that it's genius

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afterwards you think my ideas are so

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obvious I'll never be as inventive as

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that I get this feeling often amazing

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books music movies or even amazing

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conversations I'm in awe at how the

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Creator thinks like that I'm humbled but

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I continue to do my work I tell my

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little Tales I share my point of view

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nothing spectacular just my ordinary

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thoughts one day someone emailed me and

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said I never would have thought of that

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how did you even come up with it that's

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Genius of course I disagreed and

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explained why it was nothing special but

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afterwards I realized something

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surprisingly profound everybody's ideas

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seem obvious to them hit songwriters

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often admit that their most successful

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hit song was one they thought was just

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stupid even not worth recording we're

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clearly bad judges of our own Creations

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we should just put them out there and

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let the world decide are you holding

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back something that seems too obvious to

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share this was one of the things that

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really helped me start my YouTube

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channel I think I discovered derk's Serv

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was before then or like around around

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the time where at a certain point I felt

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like ah you know this this advice I'm

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giving about getting into med school

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this like I don't know study tip I'm sh

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ing the stuff around like how I take

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notes on my iPad H it's all it's all

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obvious then I read this thing what's

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obvious to you can be amazing to others

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I often like to revisit books that have

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had a big impact on me because I like to

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revisit the same lessons that had an

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impact on me and I realize holy I

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still need to I still need to take that

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lesson I have not yet like internalized

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the lesson that what's obvious to you

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can be amazing to others I still hold

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myself back from creating stuff from

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publishing things posting stuff on my

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newsletter Life notes you can subscribe

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down below if you want by the way it's a

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weekly email that I send weekly-ish with

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like notes from books I'm reading

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podcast I'm listening to that kind of

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stuff I still hold myself back from

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putting stuff in there cuz it feels too

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obvious I'm like oh everyone's read

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hello everyone's read finite and

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infinite games everyone's read books by

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Daniel pink oh it's not worth putting

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the thing in sometimes I I'll send an

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issue from the archives one that I wrote

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like 5 years ago where I'm like yeah I

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discovered this thing 5 years ago but

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here it is now and I'll get emails being

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like whoa I've never heard of that thing

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and to me it's obvious cuz I discovered

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it 5 years ago and I've been applying it

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to my life but we're getting dozens of

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emails from people being like holy

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I've never heard this thing before well

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it's obvious to you can be amazing to

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others you should definitely check out

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this book it is I think available for

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free on Derrik cers website I'll put a

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link down below and also if you like

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drik cers and you and you Vibe with his

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stuff I'll put a link over here to an

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interview I did with Derek on my deep

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dive podcast you can check that out

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loads of people have said that that

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interview really changed their

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perspective of life and stuff so I'll

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put a link over there thank you so much

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for watching and I'll see you next time

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bye-bye

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Life LessonsPersonal GrowthDerek SiversProductivity HacksPurpose DiscoveryMinimalismSatisfactionEntrepreneurshipMindset ShiftCreative Insights
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