Leading with questions the right way! The most important tip for talking with employees

Summary

This video emphasizes the importance of asking the right questions as a manager to motivate and understand employees. It advises against using questions to apply pressure or spread fear, and instead encourages open-ended questions that promote insight into an employee's motives and needs. The speaker suggests starting questions with personal statements to reduce defensiveness and recommends avoiding rapid, short questions that can corner employees. The video concludes with the wisdom of asking questions to reflect intelligence and wisdom, urging leaders to always ask effectively.

Takeaways

• 🗣️ Leading with questions is crucial for motivating employees and it's important to ask them correctly.
• 🤔 The right questions can help a manager understand what truly matters to their employees during appraisal interviews.
• 📝 Baroness Mary from Abner Aschenbach emphasizes that asking questions is key to learning, contrasting with merely talking.
• 💡 Questions should be purposeful and respectful to avoid creating a negative impression or environment.
• 🛠 Different types of questions can serve various purposes such as gathering information, project status updates, coaching, resolving conflicts, and building trust.
• ⚠️ Inappropriate questioning can apply pressure, demonstrate dominance, and even spread fear within a team.
• 🚫 Managers should be aware of how their questioning style can unintentionally intimidate or corner their employees.
• 💭 Avoid rapid, short questions that can make employees feel interrogated; instead, allow them time to think and respond.
• 🔍 Open questions that require more than a 'yes' or 'no' response can provide deeper insights into an employee's thoughts and feelings.
• 🚫 Handle 'why' questions carefully as they can put people on the defensive and lead to unproductive loops of explanation.
• 🔄 Instead of 'why', ask about intentions, lessons learned, or future improvements to focus on solutions rather than dwelling on past problems.
• 🌟 Egyptian writer Naguib Mahfouz highlights the wisdom in asking the right questions, suggesting they reveal more about a person than their answers.

Q & A

Why is leading with questions important for motivating employees?

Leading with questions is crucial for motivating employees because it allows managers to understand what truly matters to them, fosters open communication, and helps in coaching and developing their skills.

What is the significance of asking questions correctly as a manager?

Asking questions correctly ensures that the conversation is productive and respectful, avoiding the creation of a threatening or intimidating environment, which is essential for effective leadership and employee motivation.

How can asking questions help in resolving conflicts in a team?

Questions can help in resolving conflicts by uncovering the underlying issues, promoting open dialogue, and allowing team members to express their perspectives and concerns, which can lead to a mutual understanding and resolution.

What is the role of questions in building trust within a team?

Questions play a vital role in building trust by showing that the manager is interested in the team's thoughts and feelings, is open to feedback, and values their input, which in turn encourages transparency and honesty.

Why should managers avoid short, rapid-fire questions when dealing with employees?

Short, rapid-fire questions can make employees feel cornered and threatened, leading to defensive behavior and hindering open communication. It's better to give employees time to think and respond thoughtfully.

What is the purpose of using open questions in a managerial context?

Open questions are used to gather more information, understand motives, needs, opinions, and fears of employees, and to promote a good relationship by encouraging in-depth and reflective responses.

How can the way a question is phrased affect the employee's perception of the manager?

The phrasing of a question can significantly affect an employee's perception. A question that starts with a personal statement and shows understanding can reduce fear and defensiveness, whereas a short, direct question can increase the feeling of being interrogated.

What is the potential downside of asking 'why' questions in a managerial context?

Asking 'why' questions can put employees on the defensive, as they may feel they are being blamed or judged. This can lead to endless loops of explanations and a focus on past problems rather than solutions.

What alternative approach can managers take instead of asking 'why' questions?

Instead of asking 'why', managers can ask about intentions behind decisions, or inquire about learning opportunities and future improvements, which can lead to more constructive and forward-looking conversations.

How can a manager ensure that their questions are purposeful and respectful?

A manager can ensure their questions are purposeful and respectful by considering the intention behind the question, phrasing it in a way that shows understanding, and allowing employees ample time to provide thoughtful responses.

What does the quote from Naguib Mahfouz suggest about the importance of the questions we ask?

The quote by Naguib Mahfouz suggests that the questions we ask can reveal our wisdom and intelligence. It implies that asking the right questions is a sign of a thoughtful and insightful person, which is particularly important for leaders.