What Your Anxiety Is Trying to Tell You | Tour Stop: San Diego

Summary

The speaker explores the concept of goal-directed actions and the hierarchy of motivations, delving into the nature of emotions and their role in guiding behavior. They discuss how positive emotions propel us towards our goals, while negative emotions indicate obstacles. The talk also touches on the importance of shared narratives for societal unity and the pitfalls of postmodern skepticism towards overarching stories, advocating for a narrative that fosters internal and social harmony.

Takeaways

• 🔍 The script discusses the importance of understanding the hierarchy of goals and motivations in human behavior, emphasizing that actions are nested within a sequence of goal-directed actions.
• 🤔 It highlights the process of questioning 'why' to uncover deeper motivations, suggesting that people often cannot articulate the ultimate reasons behind their actions, hinting at a fundamental purpose or meaning.
• 🌐 The concept of 'reciprocal altruism' is introduced, suggesting that being productive and generous encourages others to do the same, leading to a more stable and harmonious society.
• 📚 The script touches on the idea of a 'divine order' and the eternal battle between good and evil, indicating a deeper, possibly religious or philosophical, substrate to human actions and motivations.
• 🚀 The speaker encourages making conscious what is often an implicit understanding of these motivations, suggesting it can lead to a more meaningful and directed life.
• 😞 Disappointment and anxiety are described as signals that a person's goal-directed pathway has been disrupted, leading to a state of complexity and uncertainty about how to proceed.
• 😖 Anxiety, in particular, is characterized as the emergence of multiple pathways when a singular, clear path to a goal is no longer available, causing a breakdown in attentional hierarchy.
• 😊 Positive emotions are linked to a clear pathway towards a valued goal, providing motivation and energy conservation as one moves closer to achieving that goal.
• 💡 The script explains that positive emotions not only propel action but also reinforce habits that are beneficial, while negative emotions indicate a need for reevaluation or change.
• 🎬 The process of empathy and understanding others is described through the mechanism of adopting the goals and emotions of characters in a narrative, such as in a movie.
• 🌱 The importance of a shared narrative for societal unity and peace is emphasized, suggesting that without a common understanding and direction, conflict and disunity arise.
• 🛑 The critique of postmodernism's skepticism towards meta-narratives is presented, warning of the dangers of internal and social disunity without a unifying narrative or story.

Q & A

Why does the speaker ask a series of 'why' questions to students?

The speaker asks a series of 'why' questions to students to illustrate how their actions are nested in a sequence of goal-directed actions, which can be more or less sophisticated. This helps in understanding the underlying motivations and goals behind their actions.

What happens when people run out of explanations for their actions?

When people run out of explanations for their actions, it indicates that their sequence of goal-directed actions lacks sophistication. They may become defensive or aggressive, as they haven't deeply considered the underlying reasons for their behavior.

How does the speaker describe the difference between sophisticated and unsophisticated goal-directed actions?

Sophisticated goal-directed actions are nested within a well-developed hierarchy of answers and reasons, often reflecting complex motivations and long-term planning. Unsophisticated actions, on the other hand, are shallow and may only be a few steps deep, lacking deeper purpose or long-term goals.

What role does negative emotion play in goal-directed behavior?

Negative emotion signals that an individual's current actions are not relevant to their goal or are interfering with it. It can lead to disappointment and anxiety, indicating that the pathway to the goal has been disrupted.

How does the speaker explain anxiety in relation to goal disruption?

Anxiety arises when the pathway to a goal is disrupted, leading to a multiplicity of pathways and an inability to compute the necessary energy to achieve the goal. This results in chaos and a collapse of an organizing narrative.

What is the significance of positive emotion in goal-directed actions?

Positive emotion impels individuals forward towards their goals. It is linked to the perception of a clear pathway to a valued goal, increasing efficiency and reducing energy demand as one progresses towards the goal. It also encourages the development of productive habits.

How does the brain's dopamine system relate to goal-directed behavior?

The brain releases dopamine when an individual's actions successfully lead to a desired outcome. This dopamine release reinforces the neural circuits involved in those actions, making them stronger and more likely to be repeated, thus fostering positive habits and motivation.

What is the role of shared narratives in a civil society?

Shared narratives are crucial for a civil society because they align individuals' emotional states and behaviors, making interactions predictable and reducing conflict. Without a uniting narrative, social disunity and internal conflict arise.

What critique does the speaker offer regarding postmodernism's view on narratives?

The speaker critiques postmodernism for its skepticism of meta-narratives, arguing that this leads to internal disunion and social disunity. The postmodernist view that all narratives are about power and oppression is seen as overly dismal and impractical for fostering a peaceful and productive society.

How does the speaker connect the idea of play and romantic love to a well-organized life?

The speaker suggests that play and romantic love represent the manifestation of a wise instinct that orients individuals towards meaning and positive relationships. Engaging in play and romantic love in adulthood can lead to a fulfilling life and harmonious relationships.

What does the speaker imply about the importance of fairness in business relationships?

Fairness in business relationships is essential for long-term success. Providing reliable service and delivering on promises builds positive emotions and trust with customers and employees, fostering repeat business and a good reputation, while dishonesty leads to failure and resentment.

Outlines

00:00

🤔 The Pursuit of Goals and the Nature of Disappointment

The speaker begins by illustrating the concept of goal-directed actions, using the Socratic method to question the motives behind everyday activities. They explain how people often have a hierarchy of reasons for their actions, which can range from simple desires to complex philosophical justifications. The discussion then shifts to the emotional responses of disappointment and anxiety, which arise when the expected pathway to a goal is disrupted. The speaker uses the metaphor of a car breaking down to explain how such disruptions can lead to a cascade of anxious thoughts about the consequences and alternatives. The paragraph concludes with the idea that understanding and making conscious one's underlying motivations and beliefs can be beneficial.

05:01

😨 Anxiety as a Signal of Narrative Disruption

This paragraph delves into the role of anxiety as an indicator of complexity and the loss of a clear path towards a goal. The speaker describes how anxiety emerges when the body cannot efficiently allocate resources to achieve an objective, and how it signals the reemergence of chaos in one's life. They also discuss the positive emotions associated with moving towards a goal, explaining how positive emotions like enthusiasm are linked to a clear pathway forward and are reinforced by the brain's dopamine release, which encourages the development of beneficial habits. The speaker emphasizes the importance of understanding the role of emotions in guiding actions and the significance of a coherent narrative in one's life.

10:01

👥 Shared Narratives and the Basis of Society

The speaker discusses the importance of shared narratives in creating a unified and peaceful society. They argue that understanding others' goals and emotions is crucial for social cohesion, and that this is achieved by adopting the same frame of reference as others. The paragraph highlights the idea that a lack of a unifying narrative can lead to internal and social disunity, with the potential for conflict. The speaker criticizes postmodernist skepticism towards meta-narratives, suggesting that it can lead to a fragmented and unhappy existence, and instead promotes the idea of a shared story that unites people in their internal and social lives.

15:02

🤝 The Importance of Ethos in Relationships and Business

In this paragraph, the speaker explores the importance of a proper ethos in maintaining healthy relationships and successful business practices. They argue that self-tyranny, oppressive relationships, and exploitative business practices are not only unsustainable but also lead to misery and conflict. The speaker advocates for fairness, reliability, and good treatment of employees as the foundation for a prosperous business. They also touch on the idea of rediscovering the spirit of play and romantic love as a means to maintain meaningful relationships and a joyful life, drawing a parallel to the teachings of Christ about becoming like a child to enter the kingdom of heaven.

Keywords

💡Goal-directed actions

Goal-directed actions refer to behaviors that are consciously or unconsciously aimed at achieving a specific goal. In the video, the concept is used to describe how people's daily activities are part of a sequence of actions driven by underlying goals, such as getting a degree to secure a job, which in turn is to maintain a livelihood and contribute to society.

💡Sophistication

Sophistication in this context refers to the complexity and depth of one's hierarchy of goals and values. The script mentions that individuals with a sophisticated understanding of their actions have a well-developed hierarchy of reasons for what they do, which can include concepts like reciprocal altruism and contributing to a divine order.

💡Disappointment

Disappointment is an emotional response to an event or situation that does not meet one's expectations or goals. The video discusses how disappointment signals that the current experience is not relevant to the pursuit of one's goal, potentially causing anxiety and a reevaluation of one's pathway.

💡Anxiety

Anxiety is portrayed as a signal that the pathway to a goal has been disrupted, leading to a state of uncertainty and a multiplicity of potential paths forward. The script uses the example of a car breaking down on the way to work to illustrate how anxiety can emerge from the sudden complexity of the situation.

💡Positive emotion

Positive emotion is linked to the perception of a clear pathway towards a valued goal. The video explains that positive emotions like enthusiasm propel individuals forward and are associated with the neurochemical release of dopamine, which reinforces behaviors that lead to desired outcomes.

💡Narrative

A narrative is the story or explanation that individuals construct to understand and give meaning to their experiences. The script emphasizes the importance of a shared narrative for unity in society and personal coherence, contrasting the potential for chaos and conflict without it.

💡Postmodernism

Postmodernism is a philosophical movement characterized by skepticism towards grand theories and narratives. The video criticizes postmodernists for dismissing the need for a unifying narrative, suggesting that this can lead to internal and social disunity.

💡Power and oppression

The concept of power and oppression is discussed in the context of postmodernist thought, where relationships and societal structures are seen as inherently oppressive. The video challenges this view, arguing that such a perspective can lead to a bleak and inaccurate understanding of human interactions.

💡Play and romantic love

Play and romantic love are presented as fundamental human instincts that guide individuals towards positive, meaningful interactions. The script suggests that these instincts may represent a deep orientation to meaning and can be rediscovered in adulthood for a fulfilling life.

💡Ethos

Ethos refers to the underlying beliefs, values, and character that guide an individual's behavior. The video describes an ethos of productivity, generosity, and honesty as essential for personal and societal harmony, arguing against the postmodernist view of relationships as inherently exploitative.

💡Dopamine

Dopamine is a neurotransmitter associated with reward, motivation, and reinforcement of behaviors. The script explains how the successful pursuit of goals leads to dopamine release, which strengthens neural pathways and contributes to the development of positive habits.

Highlights

The concept of nested goal-directed actions and the process of questioning 'why' to understand underlying motivations.

The idea that people may have difficulty articulating the ultimate reasons for their actions, revealing a hierarchy of values.

The notion of sophistication in life goals and how it relates to the depth of one's value hierarchy.

The discussion on reciprocal altruism and its role in encouraging productivity and generosity for societal benefits.

The exploration of the 'religious substrate' and the deep-seated beliefs that influence our actions and reactions.

The role of disappointment and anxiety as signals for the disruption of goal-oriented pathways.

Anxiety as a response to the emergence of multiple pathways when a singular goal is obstructed.

The analogy of a car breaking down to explain the onset of anxiety due to disrupted plans.

The explanation of how positive emotions propel us towards valued goals and the link to action.

The neurochemical basis of positive emotions, including the role of dopamine in motivation and habit formation.

The advice against forming habits of pursuing things detrimental to oneself due to the internalization of negative patterns.

The energy conservation aspect of positive emotions and how they signify increasing efficiency in goal achievement.

The role of narratives in understanding characters in movies and the emotional resonance with audiences.

The importance of shared narratives for unity and peace within society and the pitfalls of narrative disunity.

The critique of postmodernist skepticism towards meta-narratives and the potential for internal and social disunity.

The discussion on the necessity of a uniting narrative for societal cohesion and the implications of its absence.

The idea that the instinct for play and romantic love may represent a deep orientation to meaning and a wise approach to life.

The importance of aligning actions with positive values such as honesty, reliability, and fairness for societal harmony.

The conclusion that narratives guiding attention and values are essential for personal and societal well-being.

Transcripts

so imagine you have a goal in mind you

want to get to work in the

morning I used to ask my students

question like this is like what maybe

they're going to write an

essay why are you writing the essay why

are you in class I'm in class because I

uh I need to I need this class because I

it's part of my major why why did you

why did you pick a major like that well

I'm interested in psychology well why

did you come to get a degree well um I

think I need a degree to get a job well

why do you need a job well I need a job

to keep Body and Soul together and maybe

to be productive and maybe to you know

establish a name for myself and why do

you want to do that well because you

know it's it's part and parcel of living

properly and why do you want to live

properly and well then and how would you

live if you live properly and at that

point people are usually unable to

answer you know because you can just

push people with questions about why

until they run out of explanations but

the point is is that you're always doing

whatever you're doing because what

you're doing is nested in a sequence of

goal directed actions and those can be

more or less sophisticated if you're not

very sophisticated at all you the

nesting might be like two structures

deep you know maybe you're uh I don't

know you're bored and you want to go get

drunk you know and why well because you

don't want to be bored and and and if

someone pushes you a little farther than

that you just you hit them and you know

you don't you don't want to delve into

it but if you're sophisticated you have

a pretty good high hierarchy of of of of

answers so you might say well why why do

you want to be a productive in generous

Citizen and and and like I said people

usually bought them out there but you

could say well that's part of reciprocal

altruism and if I'm productive and

generous then that'll encourage other

people to be productive and generous and

if we're all prodive I and generous

together then there'll be more for

everyone and we'll all get along better

and we'll get along for a longer period

of time and that'll make us all more

stable and that or make our societies

better and then you might say what why

is that relevant you might say well

because the alternative to that is

something like a descent into something

approximating hell and so that's part of

a reflection of the divine order and the

eternal battle between good and evil and

then you could push it farther than that

and you could say well are you going to

be on the side of the Redemptive hero

are you going to be side on the side of

the Eternal adversary like you can keep

digging down farther and farther and the

farther down you dig you the more you

get down into what you might describe as

the implicit religious substrate and

uh and it's very much useful to know

that and to make as much of that

conscious as possible so now imagine

that you've uh you've come to this talk

tonight because you've decided to aim up

and maybe you haven't formulated that

precisely explicitly but something is

driving you in this direction and then

you come to the talk and you find out

that I'm talking about something that

isn't what you expected and it doesn't

seem to be moving you along on your

pathway forward to that end what's going

to happen is you're going to be

disappointed and you might be anxious

too you're going to be disappointed

because disappointment signals that

you're experiencing something that's not

relevant to the goal that you are

attempting to pursue and that might in

fact be interfering with it that's what

negative emotion does and maybe if

you're disappointed in what I say that

also makes you anxious because you

assume that you would come here and I

would say something relevant because you

assumed that you knew who I was and then

it turned out that I didn't and then you

don't know who I am and then you don't

know what you're doing here and then you

get anxious and the reason you get

anxious is because that's what anxiety

is four it tells you when the pathway to

your goal has been disrupted so multiple

Pathways have now emerged so imagine

you're driving your car to work and it

quits and what happens is you get

anxious and the reason you get anxious

is because well you were beadling along

quite nicely in your world and

everything was reduced to like a

unidimensional Simplicity you weren't in

a car as an object you were in a thing

that took you to where you wanted to go

and it was just doing what it was

supposed to be doing tracking you along

the pathway to your goal and then it

fails and you're off on the side of the

road and you get anxious because how the

hell are you going to get to work and

what if you don't get to work and is

your boss not going to be very happy

with you and maybe this is the third

mistake you've made this week and what

if you get fired and weren't you an

idiot for buying this car maybe you

shouldn't have a car at all maybe you

should have walk to work and you know

maybe you should take a bicycle because

after all that would save the planet and

you know and maybe now you have to take

your car to a mechanic but the last time

you went to the mechanic you got ripped

off cuz you're too stupid about vehicles

to manage one and you're kind of stupid

about technology in general and aren't

you stupid and maybe you're too stupid

and isn't your wife going to that's

anxiety right and that's the emergence

of a multiplicity of Pathways right and

so what anxiety signifies is the

degeneration of a an attentional

hierarchy into multiplicity and the

reason you get anxious and it feels bad

is because now your body can't compute

how much energy you have to put out in

order to get to your

goal and so you you can't organize the

world you're you're you're apt to use

more resources then you'll replenish and

if you continue to do that then you'll

die and so anxiety is a signal that

complexity has reemerged chaos that's

the Eternal Dragon of chaos chaos has

reemerged because your narrative has

collapsed and so

so that's negative emotion that's what

negative emotion signifies is that it's

the it's the collapse of an organizing

narrative and so that's very interesting

to know so you feel positive if I walk

on the

stage and I see I know I'm supposed to

go to the front of the stage say and the

reason I want to do that is because I

know I have to talk to you and that's NE

and I want to talk to you because I

think it's valuable to talk to you Etc

that's nested in a hierarchy of value

and if I see a clear

pathway to the front of the stage then

that actually produces positive emotion

and that positive emotion impels me

forward because positive emotion does

impel you forward that's what it's for

that's how positive emotion is linked to

action so if you're

enthusiastic you're enthusiastic because

you can see a pathway forward to a

valued goal and that enthusiasm

manifests itself this is true even

neurochemically it manifest test itself

as positive motivation to move forward

and not only that if you're moving

forward and it's working your brain

tracks the fact that it's working and

then that's linked to dopamine release

by the way which is what cocaine

releases um it's linked to dopamine

release and the other thing your brain

is doing even when you're just walking

to where you want to go if you're

successfully walking there your brain

tracks what you're doing there's

circuits that are activated while you're

doing it and if what you're doing

results in the result you desired then

the dopamine floods those little neurons

that are active and makes them grow and

and flourish and so as you practice

something that's working the circuit

that is activated as you're practicing

is bathed in dopamine and that that

makes it stronger and that feels good

it's growth it's part of positive

emotion and so the positive emotion

moves you forward but also in encourages

you to develop a habit of that practice

and so one of the things I would bloody

well say is don't make a habit of

pursuing things that aren't good for you

because you build That Into You that's

what happens if you become addicted to

something you know you build a little

monster inside you that's grown it's

there it's it's after one goal uh

despite everything else not a good

outcome so now positive emotion also

signals the fact that it's also an

energy

conservation observation so as I move

forward towards my goal with each step I

take it's going to take less energy to

get to the goal and so that means I'm

that that the positive emotion

signifies what would you say it

signifies the increasing efficiency of

Your Action As you move towards a goal

so negative emotion signifies the fact

that things have got too complex for you

to to manage and positive emotion

signifies that you're approaching your

goal and becoming and that there's less

Demand on energy output with every step

forward and so that's emotion and that's

pretty much worth knowing and then what

happens when you're watching a movie is

you you you infer the goal of the

protagonist or or the or the villain for

that matter you infer the goal of the

character that's being portrayed on the

screen you adopt that goal as your own

then you play out the emotions in your

own body which mimics the structure

that's that what would you call the

character that's being portrayed on the

screen and you live that all out inside

you and that's also how you understand

other people right you don't listen to

someone and then figure out what they're

saying and then infer what they're

thinking that isn't how it works what

you do is you listen to someone until

you figure out what they're up to as

soon as you figure out what they're up

to you can adopt that frame of reference

as soon as you adopt that frame of

reference you have the same emotions and

that's what makes you United and so

that's so interesting so then you think

look there's 5,000 people in here if

there were 5,000 chimpanzees you'd guys

would be tearing each other into shreds

cuz no one would be able to know what

anyone else was up to but because all of

you are here paying attention to the

same thing in the same way you have

virtually identical emotional States and

that means instantly your behavior is

rendered predictable to one another and

there's no difference between that and

peace they're the same thing and so what

that means is that one of the predicates

of a civil productive and peaceful

Society is that everyone inhabits the

same

narrative and you might say well we

don't need the same narrative it's like

yes we do because if we inhabit a

different narrative then we're running

emotionally in different directions and

we will not understand each other and we

will run into conflict and that conflict

can become deadly at at the drop of a

hat and so it's it's a precondition for

a civil society that everyone is united

in the same narrative and then that begs

the question right what is the narrative

in so far as we're unified and another

question which is what should the

narrative be right now the

postmodernists figured out that we look

at the world through a story but they

said they became their Mantra is they

became skeptical of meta narratives

which are uniting narratives and that's

all well and good to be skeptical about

meta narratives but you run into the

problem of internal disunion because if

you don't have a uniting narrative then

you're divided against yourself and you

run into the problem of social disunity

because if we're not looking at the same

thing for the same reason then we can't

get along and those are big problems now

the way the

postmodernists glided over that immense

cataclysmic problem was to offer the

proposition that the narrative that

unites us is just one of power and

oppression right and that the

fundamental motivation that guides first

of all even your internal organization

your own internal tyranny you know

you're oppressing your ID or your

natural self and then if you establish a

relationship with someone like a

marriage well that's just a

manifestation of patriarchal oppression

and if you organize a business

relationship it's a relationship of

mutual exploitation and so far and so on

all the way up the political hierarchy

all the way back into the past a more

dismal view of human existence couldn't

possibly be formulated and I always

think about it as a kind of implicit

confession it's like so you think the

world's all run by power do

you okay I know what game you're playing

and attempting to justify and it's

completely bloody Preposterous because

first of all if you tyrannize yourself

you're going to be one miserable

creature plus you're going to Rebel

constantly as you already know I'm sure

all of you have tried at one time or

another in your life to force yourself

to do something with a whip so to speak

and what you in instantly find is that

you're so condemned to be free that

you'll even resist your own tyranny

right try telling yourself to do

something and see if you do it I'm going

to go to the gym that's New Year's I'm

going to the gym three times a week two

hours a day it's like no you're not

you're going to last like 3 days and

then you're going to find an excuse the

rebellious part of you is going to find

an excuse then you're not going to do it

and it's a bloody mystery isn't it

because you'd think you could tell

yourself what to do because otherwise

who are you you know

you're the part that told yourself what

to do but you don't listen so what the

hell's that part that's you that's for

sure so you can't even tyrannize

yourself with any efficiency and then if

you're

married men you're married try tyring

your wife and and see how well that

works and like it might work for 10

minutes but she's not as big as you but

she's a lot sneakier and so and you have

to wake up with her tomorrow morning and

so even if you do win the fight which

you won't she's going to bloody well

take it out on you the next day and no

wonder and so you're bound in that

relationship by the necessity of

continual iterative interactions right

and they have to be moderately peaceful

or you're going to tear each other into

shreds and if it's constant conflict

you're both going to just exhaust

yourself and die so how the hell is that

going to work so it has to be at least

mutually reinforcing and maybe if you

really got it together well you could

interact with each other in a way that

improved your interactions across time

and maybe you're wise enough so that if

you were on that track the way you would

experience that in the moment would be

as exactly the kind of relationship

you'd want to have with someone and that

would be something like the spirit of

play and romantic love and that would be

the manifestation of an instinct that

orients you across time properly in a

relationship in the moment and that's

such a wonderful thing to know right

that instinct for play and romantic love

might be the voice of the wisest

Instinct you have the deepest

orientation to meaning that you have you

know because there's nothing more

delightful in a marriage or in a family

if you have children than to be able to

engage in something like voluntary play

and you know if you could have the world

set up the way you would want it to if

you had any sense wouldn't it be

something if mostly what you did was

something akin to play and that's

equivalent Christ in the gospel says

know that unless you become like a

little child you'll never enter the

kingdom of heaven and what does that

mean it it means to ReDiscover that

intense immersion in life and that

capacity for play that characterized us

all as children that we can't maintain

because we have to mature but that we

could ReDiscover as adults if we were

sufficiently wise and careful and so and

then you know if you have friends it's

like well you you tyrannize your friends

well then you don't have friends you're

just a bully with henchmen and as soon

as you stumble they're going to stab you

in the back cuz you surrounded yourself

with Craven Psychopaths they're just

going to wait for the moment to take you

out that's not a friendship obviously

and if you're running a business and

those of you who've run businesses who

have a clue no this is true it's like

what happens if you rip off your

customers well you can get away with it

once or twice but word gets around in no

time flat and then you're just done and

bitter and resentful because your idiot

machinations didn't work but if you

engage in fair trade and you're reliable

and you deliver what you promised and

you're half decently good to your

employees and the people that you work

for then they're going to be pleased

with you and they're going to come back

and they're going to talk to their

friends about how well you did and

you're going to flourish and none of

that's arbitrary you know that's all

Guided by the manifestation of a certain

form of attentional priority right you

go to your customer's house maybe you're

a plumber and the first thing you do is

you listen to their damn problem and so

at least you have enough sense to engage

in dialogos right you you you actually

want to hear what the problem is and

then you actually want to solve it and

if if you do that with some diligence

they're going to be pleased with you

because they don't want sewage all over

the rug and so your interests are

aligned and if you offer what you

promise then you're going to evoke

positive emotion in them and quell their

anxiety and that's exactly the service

that you're offering

and so that means you're acting out the

proper story you're productive and

generous and honest and there's nothing

arbitrary about that as a as a ethos

that unites you internally and that also

makes it possible for you to exist in a

peaceful and productive Society

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