How to build trust in seconds | Adrienne Bankert | TEDxReno

Summary

In this compelling speech, the speaker shares a personal journey from poverty and adversity to success in broadcast journalism. Emphasizing the power of prompts in conversations, they explain how these cues can build trust, authenticity, and meaningful connections. By discussing empathy, respect, and the art of engaging with others, the speaker highlights the importance of being genuine and curious. Through personal anecdotes and practical advice, the talk inspires listeners to approach new interactions with confidence and compassion, transforming social and professional encounters into impactful, memorable experiences.

Takeaways

• 📚 Overcoming Adversity: The speaker emphasizes the importance of breaking the cycle of poverty and isolation through determination and success in relationships and career.
• 🗣️ Power of Prompting: Prompting is introduced as a technique to initiate meaningful conversations and build trust quickly with anyone.
• 🔍 Defining Prompting: Prompts are defined as questions, statements, gestures, or stories that spark curiosity and set the stage for genuine interaction.
• 💡 Prompt as a Catalyst: Prompts create momentum in conversations, opening doors of opportunity even with those who are hard to win over.
• 🌐 Authenticity through Prompting: Prompts are honest and direct, eliminating superficial chitchat and fostering an atmosphere of authenticity.
• 🤝 Respect and Interest: Prompts are about showing genuine interest and respect for the person being connected with, regardless of their background.
• 🧭 Self-Reflection: Before entering new spaces, it's crucial to assess one's feelings of insecurity or anxiety to prepare for effective prompting.
• 🌟 Affirmations for Confidence: Using affirmations can help internally shift one's perspective and boost confidence in social situations.
• 🛂 Purpose in Prompting: Approaching new spaces with a purpose to give and serve can help identify who to connect with and create meaningful interactions.
• 👂 Reading the Room: Understanding the energy and context of the room and the people in it is essential for effective prompting.
• 🤝 Influence through Empathy: Empathy and respect are key in influencing others and creating an atmosphere of trust and openness.

Q & A

What challenges did the speaker face growing up?

The speaker faced challenges such as growing up on welfare, being one of the only black children in a predominantly white town, experiencing racism, and dealing with their father's mental illness and their mother's lack of social support.

What was the speaker's definition of success?

The speaker defined success as having the confidence to approach and talk to anyone, being rich in relationships, and breaking the cycle of isolation.

What is 'prompt engineering' in the context of the speaker's experience?

In the context of the speaker's experience, 'prompt engineering' refers to the strategic use of questions, statements, gestures, or stories to spark curiosity and initiate meaningful conversations, fostering trust and connection with others.

How does the speaker describe the importance of authenticity in building trust with others?

The speaker emphasizes that authenticity is crucial in building trust because it eliminates superficial chitchat and allows for genuine connection, which can shift the atmosphere in a room and make people feel welcome and at ease.

What role does empathy play in the speaker's approach to connecting with others?

Empathy plays a significant role in the speaker's approach as it allows them to imagine the other person's journey, understand their experiences, and show genuine interest in who they are, making the first interaction more meaningful and respectful.

How does the speaker suggest overcoming impostor syndrome when meeting important people?

The speaker suggests overcoming impostor syndrome by first locating oneself, understanding one's insecurities, and using affirmations to internally shift perspective and approach new spaces with confidence and a mission to serve.

What is the significance of treating everyone with the same level of dignity, according to the speaker?

According to the speaker, treating everyone with the same level of dignity is significant because it reflects respect for all individuals, regardless of their social status or background, and can lead to meaningful and impactful connections.

How can kindness be used as a prompt to make others feel calm and optimistic?

Kindness can be used as a prompt by being observant and engaged, showing genuine appreciation for others' experiences, and creating an atmosphere of trust, which can make others feel calm, optimistic, and more willing to share themselves.

What does the speaker mean by 'being on a mission to give and to serve' when entering new spaces?

By being on a mission to give and serve, the speaker means approaching new spaces with the intention of contributing positively to others, discerning who might need support or connection, and offering that without expecting anything in return.

How does the speaker use the power of imagination to prompt empathy and connection?

The speaker uses the power of imagination by picturing the other person's journey, considering their struggles and achievements, and using this understanding to show genuine interest and respect, which fosters empathy and connection.

What is the speaker's advice for dealing with anxiety or insecurity in new social settings?

The speaker advises dealing with anxiety or insecurity by asking oneself reflective questions about feelings of belonging and self-worth, using affirmations to shift perspective, and focusing on serving others to alleviate self-focus.