How to Figure Out What You Really Want | Ashley Stahl | TEDxLeidenUniversity

Summary

In a heart-wrenching narrative, a father receives a fake kidnapping call threatening his last daughter, leading to a tense ransom ordeal. The daughter, unaware and safe, later reflects on the incident, drawing parallels between her father's fear-driven response and her own life choices. She encourages self-auditing, following inner joy, and taking action to 'you-turn' away from fear and towards one's true desires, advocating for self-liberation from life's false imprisonments.

Takeaways

• 📞 A father receives a distressing call claiming his daughter has been kidnapped, leading to an emotional and tense situation.
• 💔 The family had recently suffered the loss of another daughter, making the threat feel even more personal and devastating.
• 🔒 The father, in fear for his only remaining daughter, complies with the kidnappers' demands without verifying the truth of the situation.
• 👥 The mother plays a crucial role by quietly alerting the police and coordinating with them, demonstrating the importance of calm action in a crisis.
• 🏦 The kidnappers instruct the father to go to the bank to wire money, a common tactic in such scams, while keeping them on the line to monitor his actions.
• 🚓 The police's involvement and their ability to quickly discern the situation as a scam saves the father from losing his life savings.
• 📱 The daughter, unaware of the situation, is contacted by the police and plays a key role in confirming the scam to her father.
• 😢 The emotional toll on the father is profound, highlighting the psychological impact of such a scam on victims and their families.
• 🤔 The daughter reflects on the incident, questioning why intelligent people can fall for such scams and the power of fear in decision-making.
• 🔑 The concept of 'self-kidnapping' is introduced, where individuals limit their own potential out of fear or a perceived need for survival.
• 🛤️ The speaker encourages a 'you-turn', a personal pivot towards self-truth, following one's joy, and taking action to live the life one truly desires.

Q & A

What was the initial event that triggered the series of events in the script?

The initial event was a phone call received by the father from an unknown number, where he heard a woman crying and screaming, followed by a man's voice claiming to have kidnapped his daughter.

How did the father respond to the kidnappers' demands?

The father, in a state of fear and desperation, complied with the kidnappers' demands, agreeing to pay a ransom and follow their instructions.

What action did the mother take after receiving the note from the father?

The mother quietly went outside, with trembling hands, and managed to call 911 for help.

What was the protagonist doing during the time of the alleged kidnapping?

The protagonist was conducting a podcast interview in her Beverly Hills office, unaware of the situation.

How did the protagonist find out about the situation involving her family?

She found out through a text message from the police after her podcast interview ended, which prompted her to call the officer.

What was the protagonist's professional background that influenced her perspective on the situation?

The protagonist had worked in counter-terrorism at the Pentagon, which gave her a heightened sense of the potential severity of the situation.

What was the turning point that revealed the kidnapping to be a scam?

The turning point was when Officer Johnson confirmed with the protagonist over the phone that she was safe and revealed the call to her father was a scam.

How did the protagonist's father react when he realized it was a scam?

The father was extremely emotional, breaking down and sobbing, showing a level of vulnerability he had not displayed even during other tragic events in his life.

What personal realization did the protagonist have after the incident?

The protagonist realized that she had been 'kidnapping' herself from the life she truly wanted by making choices out of fear and necessity, rather than following her true desires.

What advice does the protagonist offer to others to avoid 'kidnapping' themselves?

The protagonist advises others to conduct a self-audit, follow what feels good, and take action to make a 'you-turn' towards a life that aligns with their true desires.

What is the significance of the 'joy journal' mentioned in the script?

The 'joy journal' is a tool to help individuals identify moments of inspiration and joy, which can reveal patterns and insights about their true passions and skills.