How Men Secretly Judge a Woman’s Value -
Summary
TLDRThe video script delves into the psychology of attraction and dating, highlighting how one's emotional reactions, boundaries, and personal history can impact how they are perceived by others. It emphasizes the importance of self-worth, setting boundaries, and the non-verbal cues that reveal a person's past and psychological state. The speaker also discusses the influence of one's social circle and treatment of others on their perceived value, offering insights into self-improvement and assertiveness in relationships.
Takeaways
- 😣 Emotional reactions can reveal a person's history of being used or taken for granted in relationships.
- 🏁 Speeding up the pace of a relationship can signal weakness and a history of being on the receiving end of one-sided relationships.
- 🚫 Lack of boundaries is often perceived as a sign of low self-worth and can invite disrespect from others.
- 👀 A person's past can be discerned through their psychological defenses, such as eye contact and habits.
- 🔍 Sexual habits can be telling about a person's character and past, often without their conscious awareness.
- 🤔 Non-verbal cues like nervousness, fast speech, and closed body language can indicate anxiety and a history of being in weak positions.
- 💭 Boundaries are crucial to prevent continuous disrespect and to demonstrate inner strength.
- 💼 How you dress can affect how others perceive and treat you professionally.
- 🗣 Oversharing personal information too quickly can be seen as a lack of emotional stability and common sense.
- 🗣️ Speaking ill of friends or exes can lead others to believe that you may do the same about them in the future.
- 👥 Observing how friends and others treat you can reveal aspects of your personality and self-worth.
- 💬 The way you talk about others and how you are treated by them can influence how new acquaintances perceive you.
Q & A
What does the speaker suggest is revealed when someone is quick to chase or show interest without receiving any feedback?
-The speaker suggests that when someone quickly chases or shows interest without receiving feedback, it indicates that the person has been used to or accustomed to chasing unconditionally, and it may show they have been the weak one in most of their relationships.
According to the speaker, what does it mean when a person's value is determined by what they tolerate from others?
-The speaker implies that a person's value is determined by what they tolerate from others in the sense that if they tolerate being taken advantage of or given up on easily, it communicates to others that they have low self-value.
What does the speaker mean by 'blood bombing' and how does it communicate weakness to others?
-The term 'blood bombing' is not explicitly defined in the script, but it seems to refer to overly aggressive or intense behavior in trying to attract someone's attention. The speaker suggests that such behavior communicates weakness because it shows a lack of control over one's emotions and a desperate need for attention.
Why does the speaker say that having no boundaries indicates low personal worth?
-The speaker argues that having no boundaries indicates low personal worth because it implies that one is willing to accept any kind of treatment from others, suggesting a lack of self-respect and an openness to being taken advantage of.
How can a person's past be seen through their psychological defenses, according to the speaker?
-The speaker suggests that a person's past can be seen through their psychological defenses, such as their eye contact, habits, and tolerance levels. These non-verbal cues can reveal their history and their past experiences in relationships.
What does the speaker mean by 'your sexual habits say a lot about you'?
-The speaker implies that the way a person approaches and engages in sexual activities can reveal a lot about their character, habits, and possibly their past experiences. It may indicate whether they have been in unhealthy or unusual relationships.
Why does the speaker believe that oversharing can be a sign of low emotional stability?
-The speaker believes that oversharing can be a sign of low emotional stability because it may indicate a lack of self-awareness and an inability to discern what is appropriate to share, especially in new relationships or with people they have just met.
What does the speaker suggest is the impact of how you talk about your friends and exes on how others perceive you?
-The speaker suggests that if you speak negatively or gossip about your friends and exes, others may perceive you as someone who cannot be trusted, as they may assume that you would do the same to them.
How does the speaker explain the importance of how others treat you in revealing your character?
-The speaker explains that observing how others treat you can reveal a lot about your character because it may show if you tolerate disrespect or mistreatment, which can indicate a lack of self-worth or boundaries.
What advice does the speaker give regarding the importance of treating oneself with love and respect?
-The speaker advises that treating oneself with love and respect involves keeping one's word, following through on commitments, and not tolerating disrespect from others. This sets a standard for how others should treat you.
Why does the speaker say that people judge you on your past, particularly your sexual history?
-The speaker states that people judge you on your past, especially your sexual history, because it can indicate your values, experiences, and behaviors in relationships. This judgment can be significant and sometimes unforgivable, depending on the person's values.
Outlines
📈 The Impact of Wanting to Speed Things Up
This paragraph discusses how the desire to rush things, such as emotionally investing too quickly, shows a lack of emotional control and low self-worth. It emphasizes the importance of maintaining boundaries and not giving yourself up easily, as it communicates weakness and low value to others.
🧠 The Importance of Personal Boundaries and Psychological Defenses
This paragraph highlights how a person's history and psychological defenses reflect their self-worth. It explains that having no boundaries indicates low value and discusses how non-verbal cues, like eye contact and body language, reveal a person's past and emotional state.
👗 The Psychological Effects of Personal Presentation
This section discusses the significance of how you dress and present yourself, and how it affects others' perceptions of you. It also touches on the importance of controlling what you share with others, as oversharing can indicate emotional instability and lack of common sense.
🗣️ The Consequences of Gossiping and How Friends Treat You
This paragraph covers the negative impact of gossiping about friends and exes, as it makes others think you might do the same to them. It also discusses how observing how others treat you and how you treat others, especially those in service roles, reveals aspects of your character.
💼 The Role of Self-Respect and Handling Disrespect
This section emphasizes the need for self-respect and not tolerating disrespect from others. It explains how people will treat you based on how you allow them to treat you and the importance of maintaining personal boundaries and standards.
🔍 Judging Based on Personal History and Sexual Behavior
This paragraph delves into how people judge others based on their sexual history and past behaviors. It discusses the stigma associated with promiscuity and how conservative views on sexual behavior can impact relationships and judgments.
📚 Introduction to Mindful Attraction University
This section introduces the Mindful Attraction University and the courses offered by Professor Alex. It outlines the various courses available, the benefits of purchasing them, and the different pricing options for both basic and premium bundles.
🎓 Purchasing Options and Course Benefits
This paragraph explains the purchasing options for the courses at Mindful Attraction University. It details the benefits of buying the entire bundle versus individual courses, the non-refund policy for bundles, and encourages potential buyers to try a single course before committing to the full package.
Mindmap
Keywords
💡Emotional Control
💡Unconditional Chasing
💡Psychological Defenses
💡Sexual Habits
💡Non-Verbal Cues
💡Aggressive Energy
💡Professionalism
💡Oversharing
💡Treating Others
💡Self-Worth
💡Judgment
Highlights
The importance of not showing desperation or weakness in relationships, as it can indicate a history of being taken advantage of.
The impact of psychological defenses and boundaries on how others perceive your value and respect you.
How a person's past and value can be discerned through their eye contact, habits, and tolerance levels.
The revelation of personal history and habits, particularly sexual habits, which can unconsciously communicate a lot about a person.
Transcripts
the first one is wanting to speed things
up um this is honestly this will show
any person that you have no control of
your emotions this will show any person
that you have been used to or accustomed
to chasing unconditionally anytime
somebody you run into somebody who
chases you without getting any feedback
on your part or without even matching
your energy tells you that this person
has been in in in one side of
relationships tells you that this person
has been the weak one in most of their
relationships um and a lot of people
when they see that they sort of say if
somebody took advantage of you somebody
took you for granted if you gave
yourself up that easily when I mean
giving yourself up people we don't talk
about sex that's not it we're talking
about emotionally when you give yourself
up so easily and where you're reactive
to them where everything that does
affects you then you're pretty much
communicating to them that other people
have done that and that you are of low
value
right because you your value is worth
what you tolerate from people okay so I
wed to speed things up blood bombing all
that kind of stuff communicates weakness
to people right and the next one is your
history okay your history is seen
through your psychological defenses if
you have no B boundaries that just shows
you you have low Worth right because a
in a a country without boundaries is
pretty worthless right um people without
boundaries have low value in general
because it means that you could do
anything to me and I'm still going to be
there
so like how how is that any sign of
having any personal Worth right and your
past also like I said earlier is seen
through your face in other words you
could see a person's past by their eye
contact by their Habits by what they
tolerate from you and also by their
sexual habits okay um your sexual habits
say a lot about you and you may not even
know it
and the thing is is that a lot of people
who have weird sex habits they don't
know that it's weird because they're
used to it like they habituate to it so
someone like somebody someone who has a
smelly apartment you enter it you're
like yo it smells and they're like no it
don't like oh it doesn't smell because
you're used to it right and that's a
beauty about this is that most people
will reveal these things without even
knowing it right so that's one thing
right psychological defenses sex habits
um non-verbal cues I mean in your face
you're always walking around with a
nervous look you speak fast you respond
fast your body language is closed down
like you don't make eye contact all of
that shows that you have anxiety and
that most likely you've been on the weak
a weak position when people see that and
honestly it most people see that and
they say okay this person is gullible
like this person could be taken
advantage of there's a certain weakness
a a certain sensation of not having bone
like a brittleness to people when they
do when they show their history through
the non-verbal cues
right and that's why you got to have
boundaries because if you don't have
boundaries it just means that people
people continually attack you and you
don't do nothing about it right somebody
disrespects you they know they
disrespected you then they come up to
you did you do something else and a part
of them says is is are they going to
bring it up and when you don't it's like
a part of them just like looks at you
and and just like feels disappointed
because you know we want to feel like
the person that we're with has has Inner
Strength see they want someone who has a
willingness to fight back pretty much
right like to sense some strength in you
like you're willing to to to get angry
per se where when people can notice when
you're hesitant when you're trying when
you're hesitant to speak up or when you
hesitant to stand up for yourself all of
those things are sensed right and people
will test You by trying to see like what
are you willing to accept from people or
when someone disrespects you whether or
not you're willing to call out you know
and the only way for you to call it out
is to use some of your aggressive energy
and a lot of people just don't are not
comfortable using their aggressive
energy because it they feel like it
comes across as as toxic and stuff like
that but the truth is is that aggressive
energy is who you are right like people
grow and people move up in life that's
an aggressive energy as children
children have aggressive energy where
they like to explore their environment
and if you don't let them do that they
get angry right so it's like aggression
is part of who you are and suppressing
that is suppressing a big part of who
you are and you suppress it by not
speaking up and and then you and you and
you sort of don't allow people to see
the full ranges of your personality
because that's who you are and you just
don't want to show it because it might
look too aggressive you know not for all
the Bronx people out there who love
using this aggression this is not for
you right you got to then show so some
you know don't stab people
right and this also goes in your retire
at work right if you dress
unprofessionally people are not going to
treat you professionally how you dress
is so psychological and it affects
people psychologically that you have to
understand this like you CH cannot dress
like any any other way and expect people
to respect you in a certain way if you
want to dress in a way that earns makes
people see you as a smart person well
you got to [ __ ] dress that way right
because people judge you on your pars
the next one is what you share let me
say something the self is always coming
through okay if somebody has bad traits
about them a lot of times they're going
to find a way to sabotage themselves and
verbally say
it but generally some people are are
unaware of how insane some many things
that they
do right they they they get habituated
to it um and so they sh they overshare
they like telling like oversharing to me
is a is is it's a bad it's a sign of a
bad thing oversharing and sharing too
fast right remember the one story of the
girl whose sister who I think was it was
it her sister tried to kill her and and
they were still cool I'm like it's
[ __ ] crazy
girl right so it's kind of there's some
things you just cannot share when you
first meet people and it just it just
it's it's it's a reflection of of your
common sense and your emotional
stability right because some things you
bring shame right some things you just
cannot share with people and a lot of
people they just don't have that filter
and people judge you based on that you
know like when I was when I was a
younger man people didn't want hang want
to hang out with me that much because I
was unfiltered you know so people judged
me on that and they they judged that I
was a mean person that I was you know
not the not the nicest nicest person
well it was because I just couldn't
control my my my tongue I talk too much
and I always said things that offended
and so as much of a good person you are
they will judge you based on your
appearance and how you talk and how you
talk to them now the next one is how you
talk about your friends and your exes if
you talk bad or gossip in front of
people about your exes and about your
friends what people are going to say is
that if they if you're talking bad about
them you're going to talk bad about me
eventually and and a lot of people would
just slowly or subtly pull away a really
interesting one is how your friends
treat you and how other people treat you
you know what's funny is one thing for
me to see how you treat me and how I
treat you but I've had some of the most
fascinating like discoveries about some
people's Nature by just observing how
others treat them like for example like
you could be confident around me but
then when you with your friends you
could sort of sense that they may not
listen to everything you say and so I
I'll observe you and and I'll notice how
your friends ignore you they treat you
with disrespect they cancel on you and
you'll tell me stories of how your
friends treat you and how you're
tolerating that and how you can't see
the difference between your real friends
and friends who are just there out of
convenience and that's why they mistreat
you that way um it's it's it's it kind
of it really does reveal to you a a a
different part of the person personality
because for example I have friends right
and I have really cool guy friends but
then when you put them around women they
get really weird right and so that's how
some people judge you they judge you
based on how how other people judge you
and treat you and if they notice that
people don't respect you they're going
to look down on you a little bit you
know what I'm saying and it also comes
down to how you treat yourself as well
if they so it's but it's very
interesting how that works man that's
why
like for
example a woman might think like I'm
cool but if she sees me with my in in
school for example let's just for
example and nobody likes me and and they
I'll I'll try to butt in the
conversation when she's around me and
they won't even acknowledge me a girl
will see that I'm like yo what the [ __ ]
have you done to be so ignored like
those things matter and especially for
especially women they'll judge you even
harsher on that than a man would I don't
mind dating the loser chick of the group
honestly I I don't give a [ __ ] you know
what I'm saying but but how you treat
how other people treat how other people
treat you it says so much and also how
you treat people
who who are who are under you like for
example I've never been mean to
waitresses I've never been mean but
there was there was this one time where
in in Mexico there was no alcohol being
served because of the election and I
went to a restaurant and I'm like okay
let's go to the restaurant and get a
beer I went to the restaurant and I told
her I was like look I could tell these
people are going to take a [ __ ] long
time and I'm like let's just go
somewhere she was like no stay I'm like
listen listen to me they're going to
take 10 minutes to give me my beer I am
telling you they're not going to she was
like stop being mean to them I'm not I'm
not being mean I'm just being honest
they take my
order they they go back write it down
and then for five minutes they're doing
everything but just bring me the
freaking beer just what's so difficult
about that you're literally on my way
here just have to be in your hand it's
been 5 minutes and I'm looking at her
I'm like she's like why you being an
[ __ ] I'm not not I'm not being an
[ __ ] to be an [ __ ] like I told you
we should we should have just ordered on
the phone and now we're here and I'm and
I and I wait I'm like hey lady um I just
want my beer like what's taking so long
and she's like that you're a [ __ ]
[ __ ] to waitresses I'm like is that
really what it is to be an [ __ ] cuz
then I completely
understand 10 minutes and I timed it and
and she was like and I was like look and
she was like you [ __ ] timed it I'm
like yeah timed it you know the the my
biggest pet peeve in Mexico is is
honestly un when things take
unnecessarily a long time to do oh my
God all right let's continue with the
video but yeah man oh my [ __ ] God we
just seen part of his character it's
horrible I look I'm a nice Tipper okay I
tip people who but that one thing the
whole on like for example you go places
you order something this it's funny the
smaller the thing you order the longer
it takes
all right yeah let's continue with the
video the next one is how you treat
others and how others treat you
okay you have to learn how to treat
yourself with more love and
respect that means you got to keep your
word that means you got to do the things
that you're going to say you're going to
do and above all never tell people what
you're going to do because it decreases
the likelihood of you achieving that but
some people
let other people just completely
disrespect them and they don't do
nothing about it and so people will see
that and it'll be and people will un
people will unconsciously disrespect you
more right and so then people will
disrespect you more you're going to
disrespect yourself more and the circle
continues people can have a good good
ability to sense how to treat you
because you sort of tell people how to
treat you right and you don't have to
verbally tell people how to treat you
all you have to do is have an internal
willingness to just walk away if they
start treating you treating you a
certain way what will happen is that
naturally your behavior will literally
change because what matters most and
it's not what you want but is the things
that you will not accept from people
that changes your behavior a lot more
than that than than the
opposite and the next thing is your past
right your history sex history
okay um you're that part people really
really really judge you on that and it's
pretty unforgivable for for some people
um if they don't like promiscuous people
and you tell them that they're going to
judge you on that um if you tell them
that you you used to do this any sex
work or even this or that anything
related to that people judge you on that
people want you to be more conservative
than liberal about that kind of stuff
and with the world with the way the
world works today you know you can't
like people judge you less on that but
it's still wired to PE for people to
judge you it's like guys as guys we
don't understand that women do judge
guys who sleep with a a lot of women
they all right ladies and gentlemen
welcome to the mindful attraction
University taught by Professor Alex
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