my story | how I became a single mom

Summary

In this video, a young single mother shares her personal journey of navigating life after leaving her son's father. She discusses the challenges of managing finances, being a college student while pregnant, and the strength required to raise her child on her own. From bartending to social media work, she reveals how multiple income streams helped her thrive. She reflects on the emotional growth of being alone, the importance of self-love, and the difficulties of co-parenting. Through her story, she offers advice to others in similar situations, emphasizing resilience and self-reliance.

Takeaways

• 😀 Managing finances as a single mom is challenging, but focusing on smart work strategies like bartending and social media can help generate multiple income streams.
• 😀 Being a single mom often makes you stronger, as you learn to rely on yourself and become more independent in both personal and professional aspects.
• 😀 Relationships and dating as a single parent require careful consideration, especially when introducing a new partner to the children, and it's important to wait until you're fully ready.
• 😀 The decision to leave an unhealthy relationship can be empowering, and it's often better to be alone and happy than to stay in a toxic relationship.
• 😀 Raising a child alone while balancing college or work can be extremely difficult, but with perseverance, it’s possible to finish important goals, like graduating college.
• 😀 It's essential to prioritize self-love and personal growth before entering new relationships after a breakup or during single parenthood.
• 😀 Being a single mom means you often handle things alone, but you can still find ways to juggle work, school, and parenting, even when it feels overwhelming.
• 😀 Co-parenting can be difficult if both parents aren’t on the same page, but communication and mediation are key to finding solutions for the child’s best interest.
• 😀 Sometimes, the best decision is to not go back to a toxic partner, even if you're pregnant, and instead focus on raising your child on your own.
• 😀 Personal challenges during pregnancy, such as feeling sick or dealing with physical discomfort, are common, but they can also contribute to a sense of strength and resilience in the journey of motherhood.

Q & A

How did you manage to handle your finances as a single mother?

I managed my finances by working multiple jobs. Initially, I worked at Walmart but later transitioned to bartending at Hooters. I also used my bartending experience to secure other bar jobs, and now I work full-time in social media. Having multiple sources of income helped me meet my financial needs as a single mom.

Does it get easier to be a single mom over time?

Yes, it gets easier because you become stronger and more independent. While being a single parent is challenging, you learn to rely on yourself and focus on your personal growth. My son motivates me to keep going and work harder towards my goals.

How long have you been a single mom?

I have been a single mom for a little over a year now. I left my son's father when I was about to turn 21, and it's been a journey of self-growth and learning how to navigate life on my own.

What is your perspective on relationships after being a single mother?

It's important to be cautious when entering new relationships after becoming a single mom. I believe that before introducing someone new into your child's life, you should first be in a committed relationship without the children involved. The first six months can be sweet, but it's essential to truly understand the other person's intentions before rushing into anything serious.

What was the biggest obstacle during your pregnancy?

The biggest obstacle during my pregnancy was struggling with taking prenatal and iron pills. I couldn’t keep them down, and they made me feel very nauseous. Another challenge was the discomfort I felt from my itchy skin and the emotional toll of not living with my boyfriend at the time.

How did you manage college while caring for a newborn?

It was really tough to balance college and caring for my newborn. I continued attending classes in person during the first semester of my sophomore year, but after giving birth, I switched to online classes for convenience. There were days when I was incredibly stressed, but I kept pushing forward because I knew it was important to finish my education for a better future.

How did you deal with your baby daddy’s involvement in your life after the breakup?

I try not to worry about what my ex is doing with his life or who he’s with. I focus on my own well-being and my son. If there is any conflict, I deal with it by setting boundaries and staying focused on my own life and responsibilities.

What made you decide to leave your relationship with your son’s father?

I reached a point where I couldn't tolerate the repeated infidelity and lack of emotional support. I was tired of crying in my car and feeling unappreciated. I realized that I deserved more, and that was the turning point that gave me the courage to leave.

What advice do you have for other single mothers who might be considering leaving a toxic relationship?

If you're in a toxic relationship, consider your mental health and happiness. It's tough, but sometimes it's better to be alone than to stay in a situation where you're constantly unhappy. Trust your instincts and know that it's okay to leave for the sake of your well-being and your child’s future.

What do you wish you had done differently when you found out you were pregnant?

Looking back, I regret getting back together with my son’s father after I found out I was pregnant. I ignored advice from friends who said I didn’t have to stay with him just because of the pregnancy. In hindsight, I wish I had done it on my own from the beginning instead of trying to create a family from a broken relationship.