Pink and Blue: Communicating Gender to Children | Anthony Schullo | TEDxNorthCentralCollege

Summary

The speaker discusses how our communication with children shapes their understanding of gender roles from a young age. By using gender to define acceptable behaviors, toys, and clothes, we create a restrictive either/or reality for children. Drawing on James Carey's communication theory, the speaker explains how societal expectations around masculinity and femininity are produced and reinforced through language and actions. Emphasizing the fluidity of gender, they encourage a break from traditional roles, advocating for positive, inclusive messages that allow children to explore who they are beyond gender stereotypes, aiming for a more diverse and just society.

Takeaways

• 👶 The speaker introduces two cousins, Alex and Alayna, to highlight gender perceptions in children.
• 👗 Gender communication to children often begins with clothing and appearance, which signals expectations.
• 😢 Boys are told to 'suck it up,' while girls are encouraged to play with gendered toys, like Barbies.
• 📚 Communication is a symbolic process that constructs, maintains, repairs, and transforms reality, as per James Carey's work.
• 🚹 Gender communication teaches children rigid expectations of what it means to be a man or a woman.
• 🔄 We tend to enforce gender binaries instead of allowing children to explore more fluid and diverse identities.
• 🧠 The reliance on gender-based expectations affects how we perceive and communicate with children.
• 🌈 The speaker encourages breaking away from traditional gender dichotomies for a more liberative approach.
• 💬 Changing how we communicate about gender can transform societal views and lead to a more just world.
• 🌍 The goal is to foster a society that communicates gender in positive, inclusive ways to support diversity and equality.

Q & A

What is the main topic discussed in the script?

The main topic of the script is how gender communication affects children and how societal expectations about gender are conveyed through language, toys, clothes, and actions.

What example does the speaker give to illustrate gender communication in children?

The speaker introduces their cousins, Alex and Alayna, and describes how their outfits and names influence how we perceive their gender. This illustrates how early gender communication starts.

How does the speaker explain the role of communication in shaping gender identity?

The speaker refers to communication scholar James Carey's work, which suggests that communication is a symbolic process that produces, maintains, and transforms realities. In this case, communication shapes what it means to be male or female.

What are some of the typical gender norms that society communicates to boys and girls?

Society often tells boys not to cry or to 'suck it up,' and encourages girls to play with dolls instead of more 'masculine' toys like trucks. These norms establish a rigid understanding of masculinity and femininity.

What message does the speaker want to convey regarding gender communication?

The speaker encourages breaking away from the gender dichotomy and suggests that we should communicate in ways that allow children to see gender as fluid and open to different possibilities, rather than forcing them into fixed roles.

What is the significance of showing a picture of Alayna in different outfits?

The speaker uses the example of showing pictures of Alayna dressed differently to demonstrate how easily we rely on visual cues and gendered expectations to differentiate boys from girls, even though both photos were of the same child.

How can communication influence a more diverse and just society, according to the speaker?

By changing the way we communicate about gender—focusing on liberative and positive messages instead of reinforcing stereotypes—we can contribute to a society that sees gender in a more diverse, inclusive, and just way.

What does the speaker say about the traditional way society teaches children about gender?

The speaker criticizes the traditional approach of telling children what they should do or be based on their gender, rather than encouraging them to explore what they can do or be, thus limiting their potential.

Why does the speaker believe it's important to rethink the way we communicate gender?

The speaker believes that rethinking gender communication is crucial because the messages we send children about gender have long-lasting effects on their understanding of themselves and others, shaping their roles in society.

What does the speaker imply by saying 'gender is so fluid'?

The speaker implies that gender is not a fixed binary (male or female), but rather something that exists on a spectrum with various expressions and possibilities, allowing individuals to identify in ways that best reflect who they are.