Is India safe for women? 🇮🇳 My honest travel experience

Travel For Phoebe
16 Jun 202416:17

Summary

TLDRIn this video, the traveler recounts her solo female journey through India, highlighting both the good and the bad experiences. She discusses the scams and dehumanizing treatment she faced in Delhi, the sexual harassment in Jaipur, and the terrifying mob of men on the beach in Goa. Despite the challenges, she found solace and safety in Udaipur and Mumbai, where she met kind locals. The video serves as a raw and honest account of her experiences, aiming to inform and assist other women considering travel to India.

Takeaways

  • 🧳 The traveler decided to visit India again after a previous positive group experience, despite some intense moments.
  • 🚌 She chose to book a 13-day tour to ensure safety by having a driver and guide at all times.
  • 💸 The traveler experienced financial scams, such as being taken to overpriced shops and restaurants where she was expected to tip despite negative experiences.
  • 🏨 In Jaipur, she found her hotel room key outside her door, highlighting serious safety concerns.
  • 📸 She faced unwanted attention and harassment from men taking photos without consent, escalating to being chased and mobbed on the beach in Goa.
  • 🚫 The traveler had to be assertive and firm in refusing unwanted advances, but still felt her voice was not respected.
  • 🏙️ She found relief in certain cities like Udaipur and Mumbai, where she had positive experiences with local guides.
  • 🚷 The harassment continued even after she left India, with Indian men sending her inappropriate messages online.
  • 🌐 Despite the harassment, she decided to share her story online to provide honest information for other women considering travel to India.
  • ✈️ The traveler felt immense relief upon leaving India and returning home, emphasizing the psychological toll of her experiences.

Q & A

  • Why did the traveler decide to go back to India?

    -The traveler decided to go back to India because of her previous experience in Carona in the south of India where she felt safe despite some intense moments.

  • What precautions did the traveler take before her solo trip to India?

    -The traveler decided to book a tour which included a driver and a guide, and she spent 6 months gathering advice and stories from other women who had been to India to ensure her safety.

  • What was the itinerary of the 13-day tour the traveler booked?

    -The 13-day tour was planned to take the traveler to Delhi, Agra, Jaipur, Udaipur, Mumbai, and Goa, with everything arranged by the tour company.

  • Why did the traveler feel surprised when she arrived in Delhi?

    -The traveler was surprised to find out that she was the only one on the tour, expecting to be part of a group.

  • What kind of scams did the traveler encounter in Delhi?

    -The traveler was taken to a textiles 'museum' under the guise of supporting local artisans, only to find out it was a shop where she was pressured to buy items.

  • How did the traveler handle the situation when she was pressured to buy at the 'museum'?

    -The traveler made it clear she did not want to be sold anything and left the place immediately when the sales pitch began.

  • What was the traveler's experience with restaurants during her trip?

    -The traveler was taken to restaurants where prices were significantly increased for her as a tourist.

  • How did the traveler react to the sexual harassment she faced in Jaipur?

    -The traveler felt scared and on high alert, and she started barricading her hotel room doors to ensure her safety.

  • What was the most positive experience the traveler had during her trip?

    -The most positive experience was in Udaipur where the traveler had a great guide and felt safe and relaxed.

  • Why did the traveler decide to continue posting her travel videos despite the negative experiences?

    -The traveler decided to continue posting her videos to be honest about her experiences and to help other women make informed decisions about traveling to India.

  • What was the situation like for the traveler when she was alone in Goa?

    -In Goa, the traveler faced aggressive sexual harassment on the beach, with men chasing her and trying to take photos without her consent.

  • How did the traveler feel about her overall experience in India?

    -The traveler had a mix of experiences, with some positive interactions, but overall she faced a lot of bad experiences, particularly with scams and sexual harassment.

Outlines

00:00

🧳 Solo Female Travel in India: Expectations vs. Reality

The speaker begins by expressing her nervousness about sharing her travel experiences in India candidly. She emphasizes her commitment to sharing both the good and bad aspects of her journey to help other women make informed decisions about traveling to India. She recounts her previous visit to the south of India with a large group, feeling safe despite some intense moments. This experience led her to plan a solo trip, during which she spent six months gathering advice from other women. She decided to book a 13-day tour with a driver and guide, expecting to be part of a group. However, she was surprised to find herself the only participant. Despite this, she remained optimistic, thinking the one-on-one attention could enhance her safety. The tour itinerary included several major Indian cities, with all arrangements made by the tour company. The speaker then shares her initial negative experiences, such as being seen as a 'walking wallet' and being subjected to scams, particularly in Delhi. She describes a visit to a supposed textile museum that turned out to be a sales pitch, and her subsequent refusal to participate in such activities. She also mentions being taken to overpriced restaurants, leading her to insist on choosing her own dining spots. The paragraph concludes with the onset of sexual harassment, starting in Jaipur.

05:00

📸 The Harrowing Reality of Public Harassment in India

The speaker describes her experience of being encircled by men with camera phones while trying to film the Hawa Mahal in Jaipur, illustrating the lack of personal space and consent. Despite her clear refusal, the men continued to take photos, and even when she sought help from her guide, the situation escalated with the men arguing with him. She felt a sense of ownership over her by the local men, which was distressing. The harassment continued with a car full of men chasing her vehicle, further escalating her fear. The speaker also details her experience of having her hotel room key left outside her door, highlighting a lack of security and the potential danger for a solo female traveler. Despite reporting the issue to the hotel and her guide, she felt her concerns were not taken seriously. The paragraph ends with her expressing relief at leaving Jaipur for Udaipur, where she had a more positive experience with her driver and guide.

10:01

🏝️ A Mix of Fear and Beauty: Traveling in Goa

The narrative continues with the speaker's arrival in Goa, where she initially enjoyed sightseeing but later faced sexual harassment on the street and at the beach. She describes being chased by men demanding to take photos with her, despite her clear refusal. The situation intensified to the point where she felt trapped and terrified, with a large group of men surrounding her. This incident led her to retreat to her hotel room, where she remained for several days. The paragraph also includes an account of someone attempting to enter her hotel room, which further heightened her fear and distress. The speaker's experience in Goa contrasts sharply with her earlier positive experiences in Udaipur, and she expresses a sense of relief when her driver returns to take her to the airport.

15:02

🌐 Beyond Borders: Online Harassment Post-Travel

In the final paragraph, the speaker reflects on the aftermath of her trip, including the continued sexual harassment she experiences online from Indian men even after leaving the country. She discusses her initial hesitation about sharing her videos due to the harassment but concludes that transparency is essential. The speaker decides to share her experiences, both positive and negative, to provide a realistic view for other women considering travel to India. She expresses discomfort with the harassment she continues to face and her decision to moderate comments and block inappropriate content. The paragraph concludes with her commitment to honesty and her hope that her experiences can serve as a resource for others.

Mindmap

Keywords

💡Authenticity

Authenticity refers to the quality of being genuine and not false or imitation. In the context of the video, the speaker emphasizes the importance of sharing travel experiences honestly and authentically. This is a central theme as the speaker aims to provide an unfiltered account of her journey to India, including both positive and negative experiences. For example, she mentions her intention to share 'the good and the bad' of her trip.

💡Safety Precautions

Safety precautions are measures taken to prevent or reduce the risk of harm or danger. The video script highlights the speaker's efforts to ensure her safety while traveling solo in India, such as booking a tour that includes a driver and a guide. This keyword is crucial as it underscores the challenges and concerns faced by solo female travelers and the proactive steps she took to mitigate potential risks.

💡Scams

Scams refer to fraudulent schemes designed to deceive people, typically for financial gain. The script recounts several instances of the speaker being targeted by scams, such as being pressured to visit a 'textile museum' that turned out to be a shop trying to sell her products. These experiences are integral to the narrative as they depict the dehumanizing aspect of being seen as a 'walking wallet' and the pressure to conform to unwanted transactions.

💡Dehumanizing

Dehumanizing means to treat someone as if they lack human qualities, such as individuality or personal feelings. The speaker describes her experience of being seen primarily as a source of money rather than as an individual with personal boundaries and feelings. This concept is significant as it captures the emotional toll of being objectified and the loss of personal dignity.

💡Sexual Harassment

Sexual harassment involves unwelcome conduct of a sexual nature that creates a hostile or offensive environment. The video script details multiple instances of the speaker being subjected to sexual harassment, including being followed, photographed without consent, and verbally harassed. This keyword is central to the video's message as it highlights the pervasive nature of harassment and its impact on the speaker's well-being.

💡Pack Mentality

Pack mentality refers to behavior where individuals are influenced by their peers to act in ways they might not on their own. The speaker describes a situation on the beach in Goa where a group of men collectively engaged in aggressive behavior towards her, illustrating how pack mentality can lead to mob-like behavior that escalates quickly and can be dangerous for individuals.

💡Travel Itinerary

A travel itinerary is a planned sequence of activities and visits during a trip. The script mentions a 13-day tour itinerary that was arranged by a tour company, covering several cities in India. This keyword is relevant as it sets the stage for the various experiences the speaker had across different locations, providing a framework for understanding the progression of her journey.

💡Cultural Sensitivity

Cultural sensitivity involves being aware of and respectful towards the cultural practices and social norms of different societies. While not explicitly mentioned, the concept is implied in the speaker's interactions with locals and her attempts to navigate cultural differences while maintaining her personal safety and dignity.

💡Solo Female Traveler

Solo female traveler refers to a woman who is traveling without companions. The video script is a first-person account of the challenges and experiences unique to solo female travelers, such as increased vulnerability to scams and harassment. This keyword is central to understanding the video's narrative as it shapes the speaker's perspective and experiences throughout her trip.

💡Empowerment

Empowerment is the process of becoming stronger and more confident, especially in controlling one's life and claiming one's rights. Despite the negative experiences, the speaker's decision to share her story and provide resources for other women can be seen as an act of empowerment. It reflects her choice to take control of her narrative and use her experiences to inform and potentially protect others.

💡Online Harassment

Online harassment involves the use of digital communication to threaten, intimidate, or humiliate someone. The script describes the speaker's continued experience of sexual harassment even after leaving India, through comments and direct messages on her videos. This keyword is significant as it extends the narrative beyond her physical travel experience, highlighting the persistent nature of harassment in the digital age.

Highlights

Traveler shares her authentic experiences in India, both good and bad, to help other women make informed decisions.

The traveler's initial visit to India was with a large group and felt safe despite some intense moments.

After a 6-month decision-making process and gathering advice from other women, she decided to return to India.

She booked a 13-day tour expecting to be part of a group, but found herself the only participant.

The tour was fully arranged, including hotels, drivers, and guides, which initially seemed like a safety measure.

In Delhi, Agra, and Jaipur, the traveler felt dehumanized and targeted for scams, often seen as a 'walking wallet'.

The guide attempted to coerce her into visiting a textiles 'museum' that turned out to be a high-pressure sales pitch.

She experienced a pattern of being taken to places where she was expected to spend money, with guides and drivers receiving kickbacks.

The traveler decided to stop eating at recommended restaurants due to significantly inflated prices for tourists.

Sexual harassment began in Jaipur, with men following her and taking photos without consent.

A key was left in her hotel room door, indicating a serious lapse in security.

In Jaipur, she was encircled by a crowd of men taking photos against her will near the Hawa Mahal.

The harassment escalated to the point where she was chased by men on the beach in Goa.

Despite being terrified, she felt compelled to continue her trip, questioning her own reactions.

In Udaipur, she found relief with a kind driver and guide, but harassment continued with an aggressive photo request.

Mumbai was a highlight of her trip, with a guide who made her feel safe and relaxed.

Goa was the worst experience, with harassment reaching a peak and her feeling trapped in her hotel room.

She experienced a break-in attempt at her hotel in Goa, further escalating her sense of danger.

Even after leaving India, she continued to be sexually harassed online by Indian men.

Despite the negative experiences, she chose to share her story to raise awareness and help others.

The traveler regrets editing out some of the more dramatic moments from her initial videos, as they were part of her真实的体验.

Transcripts

play00:00

I feel a bit nervous I don't really

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normally make videos like this I do

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believe in Sharing all my travel

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experiences honestly and authentically

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and really that's all I can do so what

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I'm going to do is tell you everything

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that happened the good and the bad and

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maybe give other women who were thinking

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of traveling there my honest experience

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so they can add that into their

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decision- making as well I just want to

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say up front it was my decision to go to

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India and I take full responsibility for

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that so I visited carola in the south of

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India about a year ago now I was there

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with a really big group of people and

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there were some intense moments but I

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felt very safe so I decided I would go

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back and see more of India it took me

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about 6 months to decide that I was

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definitely going to go to India in that

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6 months I was talking to other women

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who had been there and Gathering their

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stories and their advice I knew it was

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important to be as safe as possible and

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it was on me to take every safety

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precaution possible so I decided to book

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a tour to me this meant I would always

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have a driver and a guide with me and I

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assumed I would be part of a group of

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people the tour I booked was a 13-day

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tour taking me to Delhi Agra Jaipur udur

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Mumbai and Goa and everything was

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arranged by the tour company that's the

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hotels the drivers the guides the

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itinery absolutely everything when I

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arrived in Delhi to start the tour I was

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a little surprised to realize it was

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just me on the tour but in the back of

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my mind I thought that's okay that means

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that the driver and the guides have less

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people to worry about um and they'll be

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a lot closer to me at all times so if

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anything maybe it'll make it safer it

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didn't let's start off easy and talk

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about the money and the scams because

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when I was in Delhi Agra and Jore I was

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seen as a walking wallet and it was

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dehumanizing I want to tell you about so

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you can avoid them in Delhi the guide

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started talking about Pas Minas you know

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the scarf rap kind of things and he was

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really setting the scene he was talking

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about the people who make them and how

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they live in poverty and all this kind

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of stuff it's really hard for them to

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make money shortly after that he starts

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saying how we can support them by going

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to this textiles Museum and I said to

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him no I don't want to go there and he

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kept on me about it and kept bringing it

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up bringing it up and bringing it up and

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I thought it's easier just to go and

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leave so I said to him very clearly we

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can go there you're telling me it's an

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actual textile Museum but I'm telling

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you the second somebody tries to sell me

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something and I feel pressured to to

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spend money in that shop I will leave

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and he said no nobody's going to try and

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sell you anything

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and part of me is thinking I'll go and

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I'll find out if he's telling the truth

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or not and then I can tell you right so

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you know what's going to happen and you

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can really avoid it so we go to the shop

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they take me straight down into the

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basement it is not a museum there is no

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cultural aspect bringing out all these

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Pas meaners and lay them out in front of

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me and as soon as the guy starts talking

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about price I get up and I say to him I

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told you I didn't want to be sold

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anything and I start leaving up the

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stairs at a rate of knots he's chasing

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after me yelling at me now the problem

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here is that when these things occur the

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people that take you there they get a

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kickback so any money you spend there

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they will get a percentage of that in

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their pocket so they have a real

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incentive to take you to places you

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don't want to go so they can get money

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out of you so that they can earn extra

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money off you anyway the shop guy is

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yelling at me they're yelling at me we

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get in the car we leave he still

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expected a tip at the end of that I was

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also taken to restaurants where the

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prices were significantly increased for

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me as a tourist so once this started to

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happen and I started to see this pattern

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of how much I was paying for food and

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realizing this isn't right I said to the

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guide um and the driver I'm not going to

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anywhere you guys take me to eat anymore

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you're not actually taking me to places

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that are best for me as a visitor you're

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taking me to places that are best for

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you as somebody that wants my money now

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unfortunately at this point the scams

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have stopped the sexual harassment has

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started and it only gets course I start

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to notice men following me and taking

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photos of me without my consent and

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they're taking photos even when I Say No

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by this time we're in jaipore I wake up

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in the hotel open my bedroom door my

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hotel room door to go downstairs and get

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some breakfast and there is a key to my

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room just hanging in the lock outside of

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it anybody could have entered that room

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at any point during the night and done

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whatever they wanted to me that that

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really scared me that really put me on

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high alert and from that point on I

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really started barricading doors and I'm

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glad I did because something similar

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happens again I'll tell you in a second

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so I tell the guide and I tell the hotel

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about it and I say this is unacceptable

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you cannot do this I'm a woman traveling

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by myself it's extremely dangerous I

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don't I don't think that got through I

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don't think yeah that doesn't feel like

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it had any impact but what do you meant

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to do so we make our way to the how

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Mahal um it's in the old city and

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jaipore it's a very popular place to

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visit there were some other tourists

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there but I was standing across the road

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from the main structure and at this

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point I'm just trying to take some

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photos of it and film it a little bit

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for my Vlog I'm trying to make and a

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crowd of men form around me all with

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camera phones out I'm just encircled by

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them and everyone's just doing whatever

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they want they're getting closer and

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closer and they're photographing

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photographing and I'm don't want this

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I'm saying no no no no like this trying

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to make hand gestures in case they can't

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understand it's clear in my body

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language I don't want this I am

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hiding and I just I I look at the guy

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and I'm like help me and he comes over

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and the men are arguing with him now and

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it feels like he owns me my voice saying

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no doesn't mean anything so they just

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conversing with him and I know they

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understand English because they're

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speaking English to him saying come on

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why not just one she can take a photo

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she can take a photo just one and

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they're being really aggressive we get

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in the car I lock the doors I say can

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you please just drive let's just go go

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we take off and I just kind of noticed

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something to my left I look at the back

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left window over my shoulder and there's

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a car full of men chasing us I don't

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know if the driver saw I don't think he

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did they were hanging out the windows

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phones out yelling at me driving really

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recklessly and I thought they they're

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going to crash into this car the best

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thing I can do what can I do just look

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ahead and ignore them maybe if they

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think I can't hear them they'll just

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leave me alone so we take off through

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the traffic they go away and we just

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keep going by this stage I was having

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daily constant thoughts of you should

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just leave why aren't you leaving but

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when you are in these situations by

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yourself your mind starts to do funny

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things and you tell yourself oh maybe

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it's not that bad maybe I'm being

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dramatic maybe I'm being self-centered

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and egotistical maybe they are just

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curious maybe it's okay maybe it'll get

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better so I just keep going I was so

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relieved to leave Jaipur and get to UD

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Paul and as soon as I got there I just

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felt myself relaxed and it made me

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realize how tense I had been over those

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first three or 4 days now my driver in

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udor soan he was amazing he made me feel

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so safe right away the hotel stuff they

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were all men I was the only woman there

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it could have easily been very

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intimidating again they were incredible

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I had the best guide sing he was amazing

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I just want to make this clear that that

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my experience wasn't all men in India at

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bad it was just I did have a lot of bad

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experiences and they were all with men

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so one of the last activities for me to

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do in udai Paul was a Sunset Cruise on

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this lake so they dropped me off there

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um sing said his goodbyes he was done

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for the day the driver soan was waiting

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for me um I felt safe because there were

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a lot of other tourists in the waiting

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area and there were security guards I

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sat down just waiting quietly by myself

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and a man approached me he started off

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so polite he said excuse me Madam do you

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mind if we take a photo together and I

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said I'm sorry but no and I was very

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polite but firm with him he didn't want

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to hear no and he didn't take no for an

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answer so he started reaching for his

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phone just pulling it out already going

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no come on why not you can just take one

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photo and I start trying to hide and

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cover myself I'm sat on a chair I feel

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very cornered I'm feeling very

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uncomfortable he just keeps going and

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he's pulling out this phone and he's

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going come on come on just one photo you

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can do a photo and he's shoving the

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phone so aggressively in my face I start

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screaming I figure I need to cause a

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scene surely security or one of the

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other tourists will come over I know I

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would so I kept yelling I said no I told

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you no and I'm screaming and yelling and

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covering myself he got the hint and

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stopped but during that time when I was

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yelling not one person did anything

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security didn't do anything no other

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tourist there did anything I thought to

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myself that night just get out of here

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but again those same thoughts play

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through your head head maybe it's not

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going to be so bad when I get to Mumbai

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so I get it together pack my stuff and

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make my way to Mumbai and I'm so glad I

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did because Mumbai was without a doubt

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the highlight of my trip I realized

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again that I was just so tense I'm sure

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when I met Anand I was the worst version

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of myself he was so lovely and so kind

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and just such a good man that he allowed

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me to relax completely in Mumbai he is a

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girl dad he has two beautiful daughters

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and I think when you're a woman you can

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sense that in a man and he just made me

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feel so it EAS I had the mess time in

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Mumbai looking back I wish I had left in

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Mumbai because when I got to GOA that

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was when it just got worse this is when

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it was really bad so we had some

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sightseeing around Goa in the morning

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just exploring some Churches and some

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old parts of the town and things like

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that and then they drove me back to my

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hotel and at this point they drop me off

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and they say okay we'll be back in a

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couple of days to pick you up and take

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you to the airport and I'm completely by

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myself and I didn't realize that was

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going to happen and I wouldn't recommend

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ever being by yourself so I thought I

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would just go to a cafe that was right

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next to my hotel it was so close um on

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the way back I was carrying an umbrella

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I always carry an umbrella with me it

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gives me some shade and some cool but

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more importantly it actually gives me a

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sense of control there was some men

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coming towards me on the street and I

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saw them I was already hiding under the

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umbrella it didn't stop them they

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started sexually harassing me on the

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street cat calling me saying some really

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uncomfortable things to me I told them

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to stop I said no I'm not interested

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stop and I just kept walking made my way

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back to my hotel as quickly as I

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possibly could I tried to calm down a

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little bit because I was trying to film

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this video right about Goa and I thought

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you have to get out there and do your

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job you know so what some men said some

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stuff to you on the street that happens

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anyway grow up get over it so I thought

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I'll head down to the beach at Sunset as

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soon as I step foot out of the hotel

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onto the sand about four or five Men

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start sprinting towards me photo photo

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Madam Madam photo photo photo and it's

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so aggressive and I figured just ignore

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them they will go away don't even

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acknowledge them and they just keep

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running and chasing me so I spin around

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and I'm trying to hide because they're

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already taking photo go and I say no no

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no they don't stop so I pick up the pace

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and just a little bit down the beach I

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see this hot house thing I don't know

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what it is um and I figure if I can just

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get around the corner there there'll be

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something between them and I and I can

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just keep moving around that house and

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just get away from them but as soon as I

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turn the corner I run into a group of

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about I want to say about 30

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men and as soon as I see them my heart

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drops and as soon as they see me they

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start screaming

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and the phones all come out so now I've

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got four or five guys chasing me from

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one side I've got about 30 men here

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they're all yelling at me starting to

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move towards me starting to crowd around

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me phones out and I just think I I do

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not want this to happen how do I say no

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any louder how do I stop these photos

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being taken of me how do I stop these

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men from forming a crowd around me

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because that's when the touching starts

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they want to put their arm around you

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they want to get close to you if you

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just comply and say yes all of a sudden

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you're getting passed from man to man

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taking photo photo photo I don't want

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any part of this and I'm trying to get

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away from them so now I'm trying to get

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away from all of these men I I turn the

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corner again there's one man sprinting

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from this way there's another three

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sprinting from this way by this stage

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there's about 40 men chasing me on the

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beach and I am terrified I am so scared

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it is a pack mentality and it just takes

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one to start is the thing so I just run

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I just run I I take off sprinting as

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fast as I can with men chasing after me

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and I make it back to the hotel I go

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upstairs to my room lock myself in

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barricade the door and I stay in that

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room for 2 or 3 days and later that

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night someone tried to get into my room

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um I was so so messed up I was just in

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my bed just watching TV on my laptop and

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I heard the key card sound sound and

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somebody turning the the the handle on

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the door and trying to push the door I

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had stuff in front of it I had it dead

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bolted from the inside I immediately

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picked up the phone and called the

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reception yelling at them someone's

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trying to get into my room you need to

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help me come up here and stop them I

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need help um they hung up and then a

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couple of minutes later somebody called

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me and said oh sorry it was a

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misunderstanding my amazing driver came

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back a couple of days later and took me

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to the airport and I cannot tell you how

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relieved I was to be leaving India you

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know a really strange part of all of

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this is that I'm being sexually harassed

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online I'm not even in India anymore and

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Indian men are still sexually harassing

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me I feel like I can't escape from it I

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feel like it is still happening now

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because it is still happening now um I

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moderate the comments on these videos so

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if anybody says anything inappropriate

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those comments are deleted and the

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people leaving them are blocked it

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doesn't stop people and the worst ones

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get caught by the YouTube filters um and

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they're really disgusting men send me

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the most disgusting things on DM and

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email and it's awful you're in your own

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home being sexually harassed by these

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men so at the end of the trip I thought

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wow a lot of bad things happened um

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maybe you shouldn't post these videos

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and after I posted the first couple I

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started to be sexually harassed online I

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thought you shouldn't you should

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shouldn't post you shouldn't post

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anymore or you should delete them why

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would you keep putting them up if you're

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getting sexually

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harassed and then I realized that that's

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exactly why you have to do it because

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it's the truth it's what's happening

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what is the point in trying to hide it

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trying to conceal it trying to alter the

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truth of what happened so for me I I

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just feel like the best thing to do is

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be really honest about the

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experience I hope that that is helpful

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to other women right

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I this just feels weird I just feel

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weird feel really uncomfortable I will

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put as many links to as many resources

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as I can in the video description for

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you anything that I think you need to

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know or might help you um I'll also have

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some links to all the other videos I

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made if you want to watch those and see

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what the experiences were like the good

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and the bad um I didn't know it at the

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time what was going to happen the rest

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of the way so I did edit some things out

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of the first Agra Deli jaipore episode

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um but

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yeah I wish I had left them in there now

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I just had thought maybe I was being

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dramatic and so I cut them all out I

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shouldn't have done that

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anyway um so there you have

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it that was my experience in India

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Travel ExperienceIndia Solo TripCultural InsightsSafety ConcernsScams AwarenessFemale TravelerEmotional JourneyPersonal GrowthTourist ChallengesCross-Cultural Encounters
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