Live for Yourself! | Chetan Bhagat | TEDxGraphicEraUniversity

Summary

The speaker discusses the common struggle of pursuing goals, such as career advancement or personal improvement, despite consuming motivational content. He argues that many people fail to live for themselves, making decisions based on others' opinions. He reflects on his own experience of leaving a lucrative banking career for writing, only to realize he was still driven by others' validation. Through personal anecdotes, he emphasizes the importance of self-prioritization and making decisions that align with one's true desires. Ultimately, living for oneself is essential for long-term happiness and fulfillment.

Takeaways

• 😊 Most people fail to achieve their goals not due to lack of knowledge but because they don't live for themselves.
• 💡 Knowledge alone is not enough for success; motivation must come from within and be aligned with personal desires, not external validation.
• 🤔 Many people make decisions based on what others think, such as family, friends, and society, instead of focusing on what they truly want.
• 🇮🇳 In Indian society, especially, there's a strong focus on community and pleasing others, which can prevent individuals from living for themselves.
• 🛑 Living for others often means prioritizing their opinions, which can lead to dissatisfaction and hinder personal growth.
• 👎 External validation, like making money to impress others, may lead to temporary satisfaction but can result in long-term unhappiness and health issues.
• 🚶‍♂️ The speaker shares personal experiences of not living for himself, including overworking, compromising health, and chasing money due to societal pressures.
• 💪 Living for oneself requires making decisions based on personal happiness and well-being, even if it disappoints others.
• ✈️ Like in airplane safety instructions, the speaker emphasizes that people should prioritize themselves first to be able to support others effectively.
• 🙂 When individuals live authentically for themselves, they tend to be happier, and others are more likely to be drawn to them as a result.

Q & A

What is the main reason people struggle to achieve their goals despite knowing what to do?

The speaker believes that most people fail to achieve their goals because they don't live for themselves. Instead, they are guided by the opinions and expectations of others, which affects their life decisions.

Why do many people seek motivation through books, videos, and talks but still fail to succeed?

According to the speaker, while people may have the right intentions and knowledge, they often don't live for themselves. Their decisions are influenced by what others think, rather than focusing on their own desires and needs.

How does the speaker define 'living for yourself'?

Living for yourself means making decisions based on your own desires and priorities, rather than being guided by what others think. It involves self-preservation and prioritizing your own well-being and happiness.

What personal experience does the speaker share about living for others?

The speaker shares that even after quitting a high-paying banking job to become a writer, he was still not living for himself. He found himself chasing financial success to impress his old colleagues, even though they weren't necessarily thinking about him.

How did the speaker's lifestyle change when he began living for himself during the pandemic?

During the pandemic, the speaker began running and focused on his passion for motivating people through YouTube videos. He prioritized his own well-being and happiness, rather than trying to impress others with financial success or busy schedules.

What does the speaker suggest is the key to lasting motivation?

The speaker suggests that lasting motivation comes from living for yourself, where your decisions are based on your own goals and happiness. When you live for yourself, achieving your dreams becomes easier and more fulfilling.

How does the speaker differentiate between selfishness and self-preservation?

The speaker explains that selfishness is caring only about yourself and neglecting others, while self-preservation is about prioritizing your own well-being so you can be happier and more capable of helping others.

What analogy does the speaker use to explain the importance of self-preservation?

The speaker uses the analogy of airplane safety instructions, where passengers are told to put on their own oxygen masks before helping others. This highlights the importance of taking care of yourself first so you can assist others more effectively.

What impact did living for others have on the speaker's health and happiness?

Living for others led the speaker to a stressful lifestyle, including taking 130 flights a year, poor sleep, weight gain, and other health problems. He was miserable despite outward success, demonstrating the negative consequences of not living for himself.

What does the speaker believe will happen if people start living for themselves?

The speaker believes that when people start living for themselves, they will become happier, and surprisingly, others will be drawn to them. He emphasizes that people who prioritize their own well-being are often more successful in their relationships and endeavors.