Effective Communication | Dr. Rashmi Dubey | TEDxMIT Ujjain

Summary

Dr. Rashmi Dubai Kakkar, a communication coach and partner with Visible Learning Enhancement Solutions Germany and RPS Consultancies India, shares her journey and insights on effective communication. She emphasizes the importance of communication being as natural as breathing, drawing from her diverse experiences, including overcoming personal challenges and professional hurdles. Dr. Kakkar illustrates the difference between efficient and effective communication with anecdotes and stresses the need to develop this vital skill from an early age, advocating for a passion-driven approach to learning and growth.

Takeaways

• 😟 Communication can often lead to distress when it doesn't go as planned, such as in interviews or presentations.
• 🗣️ Effective communication is not just about being efficient; it's about achieving the desired outcome, even in challenging situations.
• 🌟 Dr. Rashmi Dubai Kakkar, an enabler and coach of communication, emphasizes the importance of communication skills in personal and professional growth.
• 👶 Growing up as the youngest in a family of six siblings, Dr. Rashmi developed early listening and observing skills, which are crucial for communication.
• 🌱 Adaptability is key, as demonstrated by Dr. Rashmi's ability to adjust to significant life changes, such as moving from Bahrain to Ujjain.
• 💼 Practical experience, such as various part-time jobs during college, taught Dr. Rashmi the value of dealing with people and handling difficult situations.
• 📞 A pivotal moment in her career was handling an uncomfortable situation with professionalism and maintaining boundaries during a telemarketing job.
• 🎓 After completing her MBA in finance, Dr. Rashmi transitioned into training and communication, partnering with organizations to enhance her skills.
• 🚀 Overcoming rejection and self-doubt, Dr. Rashmi learned the power of passion and persistence in communication, which led to opportunities with international clients.
• 💪 Communication is likened to a muscle that needs consistent work and practice to improve, highlighting the importance of continuous learning and development.

Q & A

What is Dr. Rashmi Dubai Kakkar's profession?

Dr. Rashmi Dubai Kakkar is an enabler, coach of communication, and partners with Visible Learning Enhancement Solutions Germany and RPS consultancies India.

What does Dr. Kakkar believe is the key to effective communication?

Dr. Kakkar believes that effective communication should be inherent, like breathing, and that it's not just about being efficient but also about the impact it has.

How does Dr. Kakkar describe her childhood experience in Bahrain?

Dr. Kakkar was born in Bahrain to parents from Ujjain, and as the youngest of six siblings, she developed early listening and observing skills.

What significant life event did Dr. Kakkar experience that required her to adapt?

Dr. Kakkar had to adapt significantly after her mother passed away and her family moved from Bahrain to Ujjain in 1995.

What did Dr. Kakkar learn about herself during her time in school in Ujjain?

Dr. Kakkar learned that she was adaptable and could handle change without it negatively affecting her.

How many part-time jobs did Dr. Kakkar have during her graduation?

Dr. Kakkar had almost six part-time jobs during her graduation.

What is an example of a difficult situation Dr. Kakkar faced in her telemarketing job?

During her telemarketing job, a client asked for her mobile number inappropriately, and she had to politely decline multiple times while maintaining her professionalism.

What was the turning point for Dr. Kakkar in her career?

The turning point was when she offered to work for free to gain experience and prove her passion for communication.

What advice does Dr. Kakkar give regarding the development of communication skills?

Dr. Kakkar advises that communication skills should be developed from an early stage in life, just like any other important skill.

What is the final message Dr. Kakkar wants to convey to the audience?

Dr. Kakkar's final message is to focus on self-improvement rather than just proving oneself, emphasizing the importance of continuous learning and development.

Outlines

00:00

🗣️ The Power of Effective Communication

Dr. Rashmi Dubai Kakkar begins her talk by highlighting the common distress people experience when conversations don't go as planned, such as interviews or presentations. She introduces herself as a communication coach and partner with various organizations, emphasizing that while many people may be efficient in communication, effectiveness is what truly matters. Dr. Kakkar uses the example of students cheating in exams through efficient non-verbal communication to illustrate the difference between efficiency and effectiveness. She stresses that communication skills should be as natural as breathing, and shares her personal journey, starting from her birth in Bahrain to moving to Ujjain after her mother's passing. Her experiences as the youngest of six siblings and adapting to a new environment taught her early listening and observing skills.

05:01

💼 Overcoming Challenges through Communication

Dr. Kakkar recounts her diverse work experiences during her graduation, which ranged from telemarketing to working in a travel agency. She emphasizes the importance of dealing with people, especially difficult ones, and how to handle challenging situations. She shares a personal anecdote from her telemarketing job where she had to maintain professionalism when a customer asked for her personal contact information. Despite repeated requests, she remained calm and polite, refusing the request respectfully. This experience, she says, is an example of effective communication. Dr. Kakkar then discusses her educational background, including an MBA in finance, and her work at the National Stock Exchange. She talks about her passion for communication, which led her to partner with organizations and eventually approach a German client. Despite initial rejections due to her perceived lack of experience, she proposed to work without pay to gain experience, highlighting her dedication to learning and improving her communication skills.

Keywords

💡Communication Skills

Communication skills refer to the ability to effectively express ideas, thoughts, and feelings through various mediums, such as speech, writing, or body language. In the video, Dr. Rashmi Dubai Kakkar emphasizes the importance of these skills, highlighting that while one can be efficient in communicating, it's the effectiveness that truly matters. She shares personal anecdotes, such as her telemarketing job, where she had to politely and repeatedly decline to give out personal information, showcasing her adept communication skills in a challenging situation.

💡Efficiency vs. Effectiveness

Efficiency and effectiveness are two distinct concepts. Efficiency pertains to the ability to perform tasks with minimal waste of time and resources, while effectiveness is about achieving the intended outcome or result. Dr. Kakkar uses the example of students cheating in exams through efficient communication signals to illustrate efficiency, but points out that effectiveness is what truly counts, as in the case where a student receives the wrong answer, leading to confusion.

💡Adaptability

Adaptability is the capacity to adjust to new conditions or changes. Dr. Kakkar shares her experience of moving from Bahrain to Ujjain, India, and how she had to adapt to a completely different environment and culture, including learning to wear traditional clothing. This adaptability is a key component of her communication skills, as it demonstrates her ability to adjust her communication style to different contexts.

💡Passion

Passion is a strong and barely controllable emotion or feeling of enthusiasm or excitement for something or about a subject. In the script, Dr. Kakkar speaks about her passion for communication, stating that she is willing to work without pay if it means she can learn and grow in her field. This passion is what drives her to excel and continuously improve her communication skills.

💡Rejection

Rejection refers to the act of refusing to accept or the state of being refused. Dr. Kakkar mentions facing rejections due to her age and lack of experience, which is a common challenge for many professionals. However, she uses these rejections as a stepping stone to push for opportunities, demonstrating resilience and a growth mindset.

💡Learning

Learning is the acquisition of knowledge or skills through study, experience, or being taught. Dr. Kakkar stresses the importance of learning from every experience, whether it's a job, a challenge, or a failure. She views learning as a lifelong process that is integral to improving communication skills.

💡Experience

Experience is the knowledge or skill acquired by a person through doing, seeing, or feeling things. In the video, Dr. Kakkar discusses the catch-22 of needing experience to get a job but needing a job to gain experience. She challenges this notion by offering to work without pay to gain the experience she desires, highlighting the value she places on practical knowledge over theoretical.

💡Perseverance

Perseverance is the act of persisting in a course of action despite difficulty or opposition. Dr. Kakkar's story of approaching a German client and her determination to prove herself despite initial rejections exemplify perseverance. Her persistence eventually leads to opportunities and growth in her career.

💡Self-Improvement

Self-improvement refers to the process of personal development and striving to become better in various aspects of life. Dr. Kakkar encourages the audience to focus on self-improvement rather than merely proving oneself to others. She believes that continuous self-improvement, especially in communication skills, is essential for personal and professional growth.

💡Challenges

Challenges are new or difficult tasks that test one's abilities. Throughout the script, Dr. Kakkar recounts various challenges she faced, such as adapting to a new culture, dealing with difficult clients, and overcoming professional setbacks. These challenges are portrayed as opportunities for learning and growth, rather than obstacles.

💡Early Life Experiences

Early life experiences are the events and circumstances one encounters during childhood and adolescence. Dr. Kakkar shares how being the youngest of six siblings and moving to a new country early in life shaped her listening and observing skills. These early experiences laid the foundation for her later development of communication skills.

Highlights

Dr. Rashmi Dubai Kakkar introduces herself as an enabler and coach of communication.

She partners with Visible Learning Enhancement Solutions Germany and RPS Consultancies India.

The importance of effective communication over efficiency is emphasized.

Anecdotes shared about how efficient communication can sometimes lead to confusion.

Dr. Kakkar stresses that communication should be as natural as breathing.

Her early life experiences in Bahrain and Ujjain shaped her listening and observing skills.

Adapting to change and dealing with difficult situations are key life lessons.

The speaker's versatility is demonstrated through her various part-time jobs during graduation.

A pivotal moment in her career was handling an uncomfortable situation with professionalism.

The value of maintaining calm and polite communication, even under pressure.

Dr. Kakkar's MBA in Finance and her learnings from Mr. Icdra.

Her journey from working at the National Stock Exchange to focusing on communication.

The challenge of gaining corporate exposure without prior experience.

A German client's advice on the importance of passion for one's work.

The concept of communication as a muscle that needs consistent work.

The necessity of nurturing communication skills from an early age.

Dr. Kakkar's advice to focus on self-improvement rather than self-proof.

Closing remarks thanking the audience for their attention.

Transcripts

good evening

okay so let me ask you a question

how many of you have worked out of a

conversation feeling distressed because

it did not go the way you had imagined

in your head

for example I prepared very well for the

interview but interview never questions

or I gave the presentation very well in

front of my colleagues but when I had to

give it in front of my boss or the

client it did not do what it had to

or I really like that person and I have

written a lovely poem for them but as

soon as that person comes in front of me

I freeze and my emotions die with me

I'm sure each one of you present over

here has had either falls into any one

of these categories or all of these

categories and I am no exception

my name is Dr Rashmi Dubai kakkar I am

an enabler in coach of communication and

I'm partners with visible learning

enhancement Solutions Germany and RPS

consultancies India

so what I want to speak over here is

about

who might have the best of communication

skills you might be very very efficient

in communicating but is it really

effective remember how in schools when

we have exams they're supposed to be pin

drop silence

still students are able to cheat because

of efficient communication skills with

signals with asking questions like this

but then here is a catch what if one

person is asking answer of one question

and he gets the answer of the other it

creates a confusion

all right so even though your

communication was efficient enough it

was not effective enough

I am not here to talk about any strategy

any tips any tricks because I feel that

communication and efficient

communication should be in every cell in

your body like how you breathe how you

use your hands how you use your legs how

you use any other part of your body

so let me start my journey

I was born in Bahrain though both my

parents are from ujjain

so my father was an aircraft maintenance

engineer in Bahrain and that's why I was

born there

now you know I was the youngest of six

siblings so anybody who's the youngest

over here in their family they would

resonate with me when I say that um

so you know how it happens like if my

elder sister is getting scolded scolded

for not finishing her food I would gut

down mine because I know I am next

so you know what listening skills and

observing came something in very early

stages of my life

but after a few years my mother passed

away and we had to move to Jen now that

was again a very difficult time for me

why because first I was grieving her

secondly I was put from Bahrain to

ujjain and in a very different state of

mind I'm talking about the year 1995. so

and I was put to a school where you know

um kids had to wear girls had to wear

shalwar kamis and I didn't even know how

to tie a NADA but I outsmarted it I had

elastics in my pants

so but then what I learned over there is

how flexible I can be or how adaptical I

can be to this change and not affect me

now I don't want to waste much of your

time and I want to go to the most

important part of my life well I run

many many important skills that was when

I did my graduation

during my graduation years I did almost

six Penny jobs I have done jobs like

excuse me sir do you have a requirement

of home loan

I have shown torches in cineplexes I

have been a receptionist in a travel

agency I have worked as an assistant for

many many people

and what I learned over there is

in the end you have to deal with people

and many a times difficult people

in the end you might be put into a nasty

situation and how you come out that is

what is showing your efficiency I would

like to give you an example of an

efficient communication that happened

with me so while I was doing my

telemarketing job you know how it is

they give you a manual and you a

probable set of questions that the

customer might ask so after 45 days of

no leads finally one gentleman agreed

and he said that yes I have a

requirement of home loan I was not all

not even 19. I was very young at that

time and I was so happy okay I are

finally

after a few minutes that gentleman

started asking me for my mobile number

now here I was in a very bad situation

for two reasons number one merpah's

mobile timing those time periods and

number two first time somebody was

talking to me like that but you know

what I did

I kept on smiling even though I was on a

call I kept on smiling you know why

because your smile can be heard not only

seen it can be heard I kept on smiling

and I kept on telling him that excuse me

sir I'm really sorry I can't provide you

with that kind of information so this

gentleman kept on asking me at least

seven eight times and like a parrot

I kept on saying the same thing with all

due respect so even if any uh you you

know scrutiny were to be done I would

have I wouldn't have lost anything

because I was calm I was polite I was I

didn't do anything wrong so you know

facing such situations also uh has to be

there within you now after that I did my

uh MBA

in finance and I I had the opportunity

to learn from Mr icdra the 11 12 former

students must be knowing him

foreign

now everything was go doing great I was

working in the National Stock Exchange

and I I went into training I went to do

training I went into communication and

after that I partnered with number of

organizations and it went very nice with

me but then when I wanted to take a big

leap I wanted to do something very huge

and I was approaching

um people and once there was this German

client I remember very well

so you know

every rejection that I had

in church

you are too young you are inexperienced

you don't have corporate exposure at

this level

so every call used to have this so one

day I told this gentleman that sir first

time you know I really want to speak

with you because very first efficient

communication

I had efficient communication skills I

knew it but I was not able to make any

advantage of it so I told him sir

everybody is telling me the same thing

the same thing set of things the same

set of setbacks

but I am in an infinite loop I am taking

four left turns and standing where I

started from I don't have experience

because nobody is giving me job and

nobody is giving me job because I don't

have experience

so

let me do this intervention with you

please don't pay me

someone okay just said that if you are

passionate about your job and you will

do it even if you don't get paid that

means you're on the right track that

really hit me is hard because I was one

of them so that gentleman was like you

know uh how are you you know he was

taken aback what are you saying so I

said sir you know what it's okay if I

want earn from it I will learn from it

and that is the passion that I have

developed towards communication that I

don't earn for a living I try to learn

for a living and that is what I'm trying

to say communication is like a muscle

the more it will work for you

only that much that how much you are

working on it it is like a very very

important skill that you have to develop

in very early stages of your life even

in colleges even in schools importance

of technicality make sure you're giving

that much of importance in communication

skills in displaying skills otherwise

get it so all I want to say is I'm not

going to take much time that don't run

or don't try to prove yourself only and

only try to improve yourself that's all

for me for this evening thank you very

much

thank you