How Living in Toronto (Slowly) Burns You Out Mentally | Financial & Social Issues

Frank Huynh
24 Jun 202412:01

Summary

TLDRThe video script delves into the challenges of living in Toronto, highlighting the city's unaffordability and competitive nature. It discusses the financial burden, with skyrocketing rent and housing prices, and the pressure to excel professionally. The script also touches on the impact of long commutes and the diminishing social connections due to the city's vastness. Despite acknowledging Toronto's opportunities, the speaker shares a personal perspective that living in the city can be mentally exhausting and questions its sustainability for young professionals.

Takeaways

  • 🏙️ Toronto is described as 'impossibly unaffordable' with high living costs, particularly in real estate.
  • 🏡 The price of a one-bedroom condo in Toronto has significantly increased, highlighting the city's inflated housing market.
  • 📉 Despite a recent decline in rent prices, the cost of living in Toronto remains a significant burden for many residents.
  • 💼 The competitive nature of Toronto's job market and the pressure to earn more to afford the city's lifestyle is a common theme.
  • 🚗 Long commute times and traffic are part of the daily grind for many Torontonians, impacting their quality of life.
  • 💰 The financial strain of living in Toronto often leads to residents working multiple jobs or side hustles to make ends meet.
  • 🤔 The speaker reflects on the diminishing appeal of career opportunities as they age, valuing stability and personal time more.
  • 👥 The Greater Toronto Area's vastness can affect social connections, with distance and time constraints limiting social interactions.
  • 🌆 The speaker contrasts the lifestyle in Toronto with smaller Canadian cities, noting a difference in priorities and lifestyle choices.
  • 🔄 The constant pursuit of more (money, space, etc.) in Toronto is portrayed as a never-ending cycle that can lead to burnout.

Q & A

  • What is the main concern the speaker has about living in Toronto?

    -The main concern the speaker has about living in Toronto is the high cost of living, which makes the city increasingly unaffordable, especially for young professionals and those not born into wealth or running a successful business.

  • How has the speaker's perspective on living in Toronto changed over time?

    -Initially, the speaker was driven by opportunities and career prospects, but over time, they started valuing stability, family, and simple pleasures more, noticing that the Toronto lifestyle, characterized by a constant pursuit of wealth and corporate success, has remained the same.

  • What is the significance of the speaker's comparison between Toronto and Winnipeg?

    -The comparison highlights the difference in lifestyle priorities between a major city like Toronto and a non-major city like Winnipeg, suggesting that the lifestyle in Toronto is more competitive and financially demanding.

  • What financial burden does the speaker mention as being amplified in Toronto?

    -The financial burden mentioned includes the high cost of living, with rapidly increasing prices for groceries, gas, and real estate, making it difficult for residents to afford basic standards of living without working multiple jobs or relying on family wealth.

  • How does the speaker feel about the competitive nature of Toronto?

    -The speaker acknowledges being part of the competitive lifestyle in Toronto, striving to be the best in their career. However, they also recognize the negative impact of this constant competition on mental well-being and the unsustainable lifestyle it promotes.

  • What is the speaker's opinion on the necessity of a high salary to live in Toronto?

    -The speaker believes that a high salary is almost a necessity to live in Toronto, especially for those without a support system, due to the city's high cost of living and the pressure to maintain a certain lifestyle.

  • How does the speaker describe the impact of long commutes on the quality of life in Toronto?

    -The speaker describes long commutes as exhausting and stressful, contributing to a decline in mental well-being and reducing the time available for social connections and personal life outside of work.

  • What does the speaker suggest about the relationship between proximity and social connections in Toronto?

    -The speaker suggests that living in different areas of the Greater Toronto Area can strain social connections due to the time and cost associated with commuting, leading to less frequent social interactions.

  • What advice does the speaker give to those considering moving to or leaving Toronto?

    -The speaker advises that making it work in Toronto is possible but requires a clear understanding of the financial and lifestyle implications. They recommend considering one's personal circumstances and support system before making a decision.

  • How does the speaker summarize their overall experience and feelings about living in Toronto?

    -The speaker summarizes their experience by expressing that while living in Toronto can be mentally exhausting and challenging due to the high cost of living and competitive nature, it is still possible to make it work with the right mindset and circumstances.

Outlines

00:00

🏙️ The High Cost of Living in Toronto

The speaker discusses the unaffordability of living in Toronto, Canada, comparing it to other cities like Winnipeg. They share their personal experience of living in Toronto for over a decade and how the city's lifestyle has remained constant, characterized by a relentless pursuit of career success and financial stability. The speaker highlights the rapid increase in the cost of living, particularly in real estate, and the financial burden it places on residents. Despite a recent rate reduction by the Bank of Canada, the speaker finds the city's financial demands overwhelming, especially when comparing the cost of housing in Toronto to other parts of Canada. The speaker also touches on the changing priorities in life, moving from career ambitions to a desire for stability and family, and how these changes affect their perception of the city.

05:00

💼 The Competitive Pressure and Commuting Challenges

The speaker delves into the competitive nature of Toronto's lifestyle, where the pressure to succeed and earn more is ever-present. They recount their own journey of being highly competitive in their early career, which led to a constant desire for more achievements and material possessions. However, after being laid off, the speaker realized the futility of this rat race. They also discuss the city's long commute times and how they affect the quality of life, leading to exhaustion and stress. The speaker notes that despite the justifications for long commutes, such as job opportunities, the mental toll is significant. They also mention how the city's size and the Greater Toronto Area (GTA) impact social connections, as friends and family tend to drift apart due to the distances and the time and financial costs associated with maintaining those relationships.

10:01

🚸 The Impact of Proximity on Social Life and the Final Thoughts

In the final paragraph, the speaker addresses the impact of living in different areas within the GTA on social interactions and the overall quality of life. They explain how the physical distance between people can lead to a natural decline in socializing, as the effort and cost of meeting up become prohibitive. The speaker reflects on the cumulative effect of financial stress, long work hours, and commuting on their social life and mental well-being. Despite these challenges, they conclude by acknowledging that it is still possible to make a life in Toronto, but it requires a significant salary and a clear understanding of the city's demands. The speaker shares their personal feelings of being constantly on edge in the city and the sense of burnout that comes from the relentless pace of life. They invite viewers to share their thoughts and experiences, emphasizing that their perspective is just one of many possible views on living in Toronto.

Mindmap

Keywords

💡Affordability

Affordability refers to the ability to pay for something without experiencing financial strain. In the context of the video, it is used to discuss the high cost of living in Toronto, making it difficult for many to afford basic necessities like housing. The script mentions that even with a six-figure income, the city remains unaffordable, leading to young professionals leaving.

💡Lifestyle

Lifestyle encompasses the interests, opinions, behaviors, and behavioral orientations of an individual, group, or culture. The video script uses this term to contrast the fast-paced, competitive lifestyle of Toronto with the more relaxed pace of life in smaller Canadian cities. It suggests that as people age, their priorities shift from career advancement to seeking stability and a better work-life balance.

💡Mental Wear and Tear

Mental wear and tear describes the psychological stress and exhaustion that result from prolonged exposure to challenging or demanding situations. The speaker in the video relates this concept to living in Toronto, suggesting that the constant pressure to succeed and the high cost of living take a toll on one's mental health over time.

💡Priorities

Priorities are the tasks or actions that are considered most important or urgent. The script discusses how the speaker's priorities have evolved from career advancement to seeking stability and simple pleasures like family, fitness, and hobbies. This shift reflects a broader theme of personal growth and changing values as one matures.

💡Competitiveness

Competitiveness is the desire to perform better than others in a particular field. In the video, the speaker reflects on how the competitive nature of Toronto's corporate culture led to an 'ego-driven' pursuit of success, which eventually felt unfulfilling and contributed to the city's mental toll.

💡Cost of Living

Cost of living refers to the amount of money needed to sustain a certain standard of living in a particular location. The video script highlights the rapidly increasing cost of living in Toronto, including housing, groceries, and transportation, which exacerbates the financial burden on residents.

💡Real Estate

Real estate involves property ownership, including residential, commercial, or industrial buildings. The script discusses the inflated prices of real estate in Toronto, with the speaker providing a personal example of a one-bedroom condo's rent increasing significantly over a few years.

💡Commute

Commute refers to the journey that is made regularly, especially to and from work. The video script touches on the long commute times in Toronto and the mental and physical exhaustion it causes. It suggests that long commutes contribute to a reduced quality of life and can impact social connections.

💡Social Connection

Social connection refers to the relationships and interactions that people have with others. The script explores how the distances within the Greater Toronto Area can strain social connections, as the time and cost of commuting can make it difficult to maintain regular contact with friends and family.

💡Burnout

Burnout is a state of chronic physical and emotional exhaustion, often caused by prolonged stress. The video script uses the term 'burnout' to describe the cumulative effect of Toronto's high cost of living, competitive environment, and long commutes on one's mental health and overall well-being.

💡Support System

A support system consists of friends, family, and other resources that provide assistance and encouragement. The speaker in the video suggests that having a strong support system is crucial for managing the challenges of living in Toronto, as it can help mitigate the stress and financial pressures associated with city life.

Highlights

The speaker has been living in Toronto for over a decade and feels the city is mentally wearing them down.

Opportunities and career were the initial driving forces for moving to Toronto, but now the speaker values stability and simple pleasures more.

The Toronto lifestyle is described as a constant pursuit of corporate success and financial gain to avoid homelessness.

The speaker contrasts Toronto's lifestyle with that of Winnipeg, noting the different priorities and lifestyles outside major cities.

The financial burden of living in Toronto is emphasized, with rapidly increasing prices for groceries, gas, and real estate.

A one-bedroom condo that was $1,750 in 2021 could rent for $2,500 in June 2024, showcasing the extreme rent inflation.

Despite a slight decline in rent, the cost of living in Toronto remains prohibitive, especially for those not born into wealth or running a successful business.

The speaker observes a trend of young professionals leaving Toronto due to its unaffordability.

Toronto's competitive nature and the pressure to constantly outperform others are discussed as draining aspects of city life.

The speaker reflects on their own competitive drive and the realization that 'winning' may mean opting out of the competitive lifestyle.

The never-ending pursuit of more money and material possessions in Toronto is critiqued as unsustainable.

Long commute times and traffic are accepted as part of Toronto life, but their mental toll is significant.

The speaker shares personal anecdotes of friends commuting long distances and the impact on their quality of life.

The challenges of balancing a demanding job with family life in Toronto are highlighted.

Proximity and distance within the Greater Toronto Area affect social connections and the ability to maintain relationships.

The speaker concludes by acknowledging that while Toronto life can be challenging, it's possible to make it work with a substantial salary and support system.

A call to action for viewers to consider their own circumstances and decisions about living in or leaving Toronto is made.

Transcripts

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Global housing report has a Frank

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description for two of Canada's biggest

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cities impossibly unaffordable has

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Toronto become a lonely City what is

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this city what is this

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[Applause]

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city as some of you may already know

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I've been living in this city now well

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over the last decade and each year that

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I've been living in this city it sort of

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just feels like it's mentally wearing me

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down when I first moved here straight

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out of high school I would say that

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opportunities and career was kind of

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like the driving force of why I came

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here and nowadays I find myself caring

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more about the simple things like

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stability family or just attending

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Fitness classes and of course drinking

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bubble tea and as you would imagine my

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priorities as I got older has changed

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and the Toronto lifestyle if you want to

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call it that has pretty much stayed the

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same which is this constant rat race to

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the top of your corporation and this

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feeling of always making as much money

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as possible to basically not end up on

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the streets and I know that may have

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sounded a little harsh so let me explain

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because perhaps it's because I have

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lived in other parts of Canada that I've

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just recognized that it doesn't

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necessarily have to be this way and I

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just noticed people's different

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Lifestyles what they prioritize looked

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completely different from like a city

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like Toronto in comparison to like a

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non- major city like Winnipeg this topic

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is very well subjective so I'm going to

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be speaking about it from my perspective

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which will probably focus more on the

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negative aspect of the city of Toronto

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however I still want to highlight that

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there are many advantages and positive

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elements about living in the city of

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Toronto but these are some of the things

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that I'm just starting to notice in my

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life so before I get into some of the

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things that I've noticed I would

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appreciate if you guys could do me a

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favor smash that like button ring that

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notification Bell and now let's talk

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about living in the city of Toronto

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starting with the financials I think

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it's safe to say that anyone that's

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living in Canada right now has noticed

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the prices of everything going up from

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going to your local grocery stores to

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fil up your gas tank to your real estate

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having inflated rapidly over the last

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few years but there is some good news

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because earlier this month in June the

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Bank of Canada has decided to finally

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reduce rates by .25 basis anyways living

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in Toronto well let's just say that the

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financial burden fed that much more if

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anything it's like Amplified because

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let's just give you an example when I

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first moved into this one-bedroom condo

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in October 2021 this unit was going for

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,750 and even at that time I was like

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hey that's sort of high and now if you

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look at June's report of 2024 this same

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one-bedroom condo easily could probably

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go be rented out for

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$2,500 oh but wait there is sort of good

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news to this because apparently rent in

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Toronto is on the decline for the third

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month in a row but for me personally

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having lived in a non- major cities in

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Canada it's really difficult to wrap my

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head around the idea of spending

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$700,000 for a condo in the center of

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Toronto knowing that same valuation can

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get me a full detached house elsewhere

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and I know that many torontonians or

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even Realtors will probably justify that

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700k what you're really paying for is

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the prime location of being in Center

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Toronto or like that's just what it

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takes to be part of the big cities and

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all the opportunities that goes along

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with it but like at least for me as I

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get older I'm starting to just care less

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and less about all these extra things

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opportunities that Once Upon a Time Peak

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my interest in my early 20s that I just

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don't really care all that much anymore

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at least what I'm starting to notice in

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my circle of friends or people of my age

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group is that unless you're born into

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money or run a successful business

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working in 9 to-5 corporate job making

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six figures and even with the help of

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your partner probably won't be enough

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and you'll still find this city being

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pretty much un aordable which is why

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you're literally seeing young people or

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young professionals leaving this city

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altogether next I sort of want to talk

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about Toronto's competitiveness and

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pressure that exists from living in the

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city so being a very well competitive

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person throughout my whole life I found

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myself very well sucked into this

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competitive lifestyle so this was very

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well shown in my early career path of

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always wanting to be the best so like I

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would say things like oh my God I want

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to be the best it salesperson I want to

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complete as many certifications as much

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as possible like how dare this person

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get a promotion over me like it was all

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ego and honestly it wasn't until I was

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actually laid off from that position

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that I was basically forced to like

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humble myself because I was no longer

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identified by a job title and I in

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anything I couldn't even afford living

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in Toronto like I basically had nothing

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going for me at that point and if you

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live in Toronto you know exactly what

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I'm talking about there exists this

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competitive nature to always do better

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than others to make as much money as

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possible that one bedroom that you

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bought for 700k well you know that's you

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got to work harder because you want more

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space because 1 plus one is not enough

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like you always just want more so then I

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just started to recognize that like how

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you win in this game is to just not play

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the game entirely I feel like a lot of

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this ties back to financial reasons just

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given that this city is almost next to

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impossible to afford so like early in

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your career so let say you just graduate

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out of school you kind of create this

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narrative that like hey I need to make

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more money so I no longer have to live

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with my crappy roommate and then you

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finally do that and then you're like hey

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I need to like save enough money for a

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house and then you're like hey I want to

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get U married uh have kids uh have pets

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like it it just never ends so like it

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kind of just feels like even though

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you're trying your best to live below

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your means without even realizing it

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you're like living above your means

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without even living above your means if

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that sort of makes sense it's really sad

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but I literally know people who work

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their tails off for the basic standards

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of living in Toronto because apparently

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working one full-time job isn't enough

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to cover everything because that that

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only just covers the roof over your head

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you now need to work a second job or a

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side hustle to make additional income or

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that fund money and then you're starting

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to just recognize throughout your whole

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week you're like I'm working non-stop

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and then literally you will hear other

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people who kind of like suck about how

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busy and cool they are being busy all

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the time like what the heck like did we

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just forget that there exists a life

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outside of work it's no surprise that

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living in a major city naturally comes

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with longer commute times and traffic

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and at the early stages you kind of just

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tolerate it because wherever you're

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going it's Justified so like I know a

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person who commutes for all the way

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downtown Toronto from like Richmond Hill

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for work and when you ask this person

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like the response you usually hear from

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people who like do longer distance of

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commute they'll say like like this is

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the only job I could find um it's it's

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hybrid I only go in two three days a

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week um like if I'm on the Go Bus like I

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I kind of just read on it so it doesn't

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really hurt me too much like it's all

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logically makes sense but it does get

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taxing and I know this because this is

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kind of the garbage I even told myself

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when I had to commute long distances but

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let's not forget how this slowly wears

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you down mentally if you already don't

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enjoy your job which I'm confident a lot

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of people don't how would you like to

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spend 2 hours plus of your day commuting

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and when you get home you're like oh

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crap I want a life outside of work but I

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got home late and then tomorrow I have

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to commute again early in the morning it

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gets exhausting and quite stressful this

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sort of Lifestyle in my opinion just

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doesn't seem that sustain aable in the

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Long Haul especially when you're

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thinking about starting a family of your

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own like without support how on Earth do

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you drop off the kid in in the early

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morning commute an hour into an hour a

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half to work come back home pick up the

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kid and then go home and do every single

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other task that you need to do in the

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day and it's not to say that I've never

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seen this sort of Lifestyle work but I

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do notice some things like one I know

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that people either have a lot of support

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from their family or their connections

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to they come from like wealthier family

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or their thirdly which I think a lot of

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people do this is that they are able to

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do this but it's like terribly hard and

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difficult and then it just seems like so

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much has to align properly to make the

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city work in the long run lastly I want

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to talk about proximity or how distances

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impact your social connection whether

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that's family friends or just

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relationships in general some may

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already know this but the city of

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Toronto isn't just Toronto there

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actually exists this thing called the

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GTA and no not that GTA rather this GTA

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stands for the greater Toronto area

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which is quite massive so even I'm

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starting to notice that people within

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your circle of friends as they get older

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they naturally will start to move off to

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different areas so like if someone is

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living downtown Toronto and I have them

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moved and decided that like hey downtown

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sucks I'm going to move to the far end

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of Scarboro like I guarantee you that

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without any side intentionally doing

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this you'll naturally won't be hanging

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out with that person as often due to

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proximity and the funny or interesting

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part about this is that this sort of

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ties back to the commuting or even

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arguably the financial issues about

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Toronto because your mind kind of just

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does this calculation of like whether or

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not you should hang up with this person

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so like let's just say you really your

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your friend made plans with you on a

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Sunday and like you really want to hang

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out with them because you haven't seen

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them in like weeks but they now live in

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like no longer live in downtown they now

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live in like like freaking Scaro and so

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you're like oh my gosh like 1 hour to go

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to like like Scaro is already thing and

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then like you hang out with them that's

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going to cost you like $30 and then you

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got to commute an hour back home but

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like wait wait you have work Monday

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early morning and so you're like I I

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don't know if I can do that you know

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what the solution is let's cancel or

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reschedule usually not even intentional

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it's just like how it is because like

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how much time is wasted commuting like

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people's time is already constraint as

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it is with their own personal life so

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like adding the distance of like

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Community makes it that much worse in my

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opinion then you may ask what's the

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result in all this and this could leave

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a person thinking like what the is going

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on with my life I literally work two

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jobs to put a roof over my head I barely

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have any time to hang out with people

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because the time that I want to hang out

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with people they're so busy them

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themselves I'm so busy at the time it's

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next to impossible to align schedules it

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just seems like almost next to

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impossible to do the most simple things

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I hope things will get better but I'm

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not sure if it was there's just a big if

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of everything to conclude this video as

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shocking and funny as this may sound I

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want to emphasize that making it work in

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Toronto can still very well be possible

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and don't let someone over the Internet

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even myself included kind of tell you

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otherwise because I seriously don't know

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your circumstance um where you're coming

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from so like don't let me kind of tell

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you if this city is right for you in

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that sense one thing that's certain

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about living in Toronto is you're

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probably need quite the salary if you're

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coming here with no sort of support

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system and it's important to kind of

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know what you're getting yourself into

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if you're ever deciding to move into the

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city or even if you're deciding to leave

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the city entirely like I've mentioned

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before even I started to notice my mind

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always kind of feels a little bit on

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edge living in the city from the moment

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I wake up I feel like I always have to

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be productive in the sense of like I

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want to beat the traffic so I'm going to

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go grocery shopping earlier in the day

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um working just a normal job isn't

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enough because like the insane cost of

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living here is like next to impossible

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so I feel like I would have to work and

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do more and the ironic part is that I

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never really had this sort of feeling

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when I was visiting other parts of

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Canada or even when I was living in

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Winnipeg Calgary or like whatever but

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hey that's just my opinion about the

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city and my honest take about how

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Toronto slowly Burns you out mentally so

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if you made it to end of this video

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thank you so much for watching leave me

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a comment or a question down below if

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you haven't already hit the Subscribe

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button um follow me on Instagram if you

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haven't already and I guess I'll see you

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all in the next one peace

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Toronto LivingCost of LivingMental HealthHousing MarketUrban LifestyleCareer PressureFinancial StrainCommute TimesSocial IsolationLife Balance
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