How to Handle Criticism, Hate and Disrespect?

Summary

This script explores the vital role of embracing criticism for success, drawing on historical examples like Dr. Ignaz Semmelweis and modern figures like Elon Musk. It highlights the importance of filtering feedback through three critical questions to ensure constructive criticism, identifying four types of critics and advising on how to engage with each. The message is clear: use criticism wisely to build your success, not a graveyard for it.

Takeaways

• 📚 Embracing criticism is often cited as a key to success, but the script emphasizes the need for understanding how to do so effectively.
• 🌟 Great leaders and change-makers share a common trait: the ability to receive and act on criticism constructively.
• 🤴 Historical figures like Chhatrapati Shivaji Maharaj and modern figures like Elon Musk are highlighted for their openness to criticism from all levels.
• 🔬 The story of Dr. Ignaz Semmelweis illustrates the transformative power of criticism and the tragic consequences of ignoring it.
• 🧼 Semmelweis's simple solution of 'WASH YOUR HANDS' could have saved countless lives if not for the resistance to his criticism.
• ⚔️ Criticism is a double-edged sword; it can either lead to greatness or become an obstacle to success, depending on how it's handled.
• 📈 Daniel Coyle's 'The Culture Code' introduces a method by basketball coach Gregg Popovich for discerning valuable feedback through three key questions.
• 🤔 The script suggests asking three questions to critics to ensure the feedback received is constructive and actionable.
• 🔍 It's important to categorize critics into four groups: haters, innocent critics, sweet talkers, and constructive critics, to filter feedback effectively.
• 🚫 Disregard feedback from haters who aim to pull you down, and block them to maintain focus and growth.
• 💭 Consider the advice from innocent critics with caution, respecting their intent while critically evaluating their suggestions.
• 🌈 Beware of sweet talkers who may provide false validation; listen but do not rely solely on their praise.
• 📝 Value feedback from constructive critics, even if it's harsh, as it can lead to significant personal and professional growth.

Q & A

What is the common trait among the greatest leaders and change makers according to the script?

The common trait is their ability to take and act upon the criticism they receive.

Who is Chhatrapati Shivaji Maharaj and how is he related to the topic of criticism?

Chhatrapati Shivaji Maharaj was one of the greatest kings in Indian history, known for taking criticism from everyone regardless of their status.

What was Elon Musk's response when asked about the most difficult thing in his life?

The script does not provide the exact response of Elon Musk, but it implies that it was related to handling criticism, not his ambitious projects like colonizing Mars or making reusable rockets.

What is the significance of the story about Dr. Ignaz Semmelweis in the context of criticism?

The story of Dr. Ignaz Semmelweis illustrates the importance of listening to criticism and feedback, as his observations about hand hygiene could have saved many lives if adopted earlier.

What was the solution proposed by Dr. Ignaz Semmelweis to combat Puerperal fever?

Dr. Ignaz Semmelweis proposed that doctors should wash their hands and instruments with Chlorine after conducting autopsies to prevent the spread of Puerperal fever.

What are the three questions suggested by Daniel Coyle in 'The Culture Code' to evaluate criticism?

The script does not provide the specific questions, but it mentions that they help to navigate through both the good and the bad aspects of feedback and encourage constructive criticism.

How can one determine the value of criticism according to the script?

By categorizing critics into four groups: haters, innocent critics, sweet talkers, and constructive critics, and understanding their intentions and the value of their feedback accordingly.

What should be the approach towards haters who criticize just to pull you down?

Block them from your life and social media to avoid their negative influence on your focus and growth.

How should one handle advice from innocent critics who may give baseless advice out of love?

Consider their intent, which is not evil, but do not take their advice without clear thought. Respect them and learn to ignore advice that does not make sense.

What is the advice regarding sweet talkers who constantly praise you?

Listen to them but do not take their praise too seriously, as it can lead to complacency and hinder personal growth.

Why are constructive critics important and how should their feedback be treated?

Constructive critics provide valuable feedback that may sound harsh but is essential for growth. Their criticism should be noted and worked on obsessively for exponential growth.

Outlines

00:00

🤔 Embracing Criticism for Success

This paragraph discusses the importance of embracing criticism as a key to success, a lesson often taught from childhood but seldom explained. It highlights the common trait among great leaders and change-makers: their ability to accept and act on criticism. The script uses the examples of Chhatrapati Shivaji Maharaj and Elon Musk to illustrate this point. It then poses a question about the significance of this habit and how ordinary people can learn to handle criticism properly, leading into a historical example from 1846 Europe regarding the 'black death of child bed' and Dr. Ignaz Semmelweis's struggle to communicate the importance of hand hygiene in medical practice.

05:09

📚 The Art of Receiving Constructive Feedback

The second paragraph delves into the method of receiving constructive feedback, as described in Daniel Coyle's 'The Culture Code' and exemplified by basketball coach Gregg Popovich's 'magical feedback' technique. It suggests asking three critical questions to discern the value of feedback. The paragraph emphasizes the importance of filtering feedback from various sources, identifying four categories of critics: haters, innocent critics, sweet talkers, and constructive critics. It advises on how to handle feedback from each category, stressing the value of learning from constructive critics for personal and professional growth. The speaker concludes by encouraging the audience to use criticism as a building block for success rather than a stumbling block.

Keywords

💡Criticism

Criticism refers to the act of expressing disapproval or pointing out faults. In the video, it is presented as a crucial element for personal growth and success. The script emphasizes that embracing criticism is a stepping stone to success, as seen in the examples of historical figures like Chhatrapati Shivaji Maharaj and modern leaders like Elon Musk.

💡Embracing

Embracing, in the context of the video, means to accept or welcome something, often with open arms. It is used to describe the attitude one should have towards criticism, suggesting that actively accepting and considering criticism is essential for improvement and progress.

💡Leaders

Leaders in this video are individuals who guide, influence, and inspire others, often having a significant impact on their followers or society. The script highlights the common trait among great leaders, which is their ability to take and act upon criticism, as exemplified by Chhatrapati Shivaji Maharaj and Elon Musk.

💡Change Makers

Change makers are individuals who initiate and drive significant changes in their respective fields. The video script uses this term to describe those who have made a profound impact through their ability to receive and act on criticism, indicating the importance of adaptability and responsiveness to feedback.

💡Puerperal Fever

Puerperal fever, also known as childbed fever, is a historical medical condition that caused high mortality rates among women after childbirth. The video uses the story of Dr. Ignaz Semmelweis to illustrate the transformative power of criticism and the tragic consequences of ignoring it, as his discovery of the importance of hand hygiene was initially dismissed.

💡Feedback

Feedback in the video is the process of giving and receiving responses or evaluations about someone's actions or ideas. It is portrayed as vital for personal and professional development, with the script suggesting that filtering and acting upon constructive feedback is key to success.

💡Constructive Feedback

Constructive feedback is a type of feedback that is intended to help someone improve by providing specific and actionable suggestions. The video emphasizes the importance of seeking and utilizing constructive feedback, as it can lead to growth and betterment, as opposed to destructive or baseless criticism.

💡Haters

Haters, as mentioned in the script, are individuals who criticize others with the intent to bring them down rather than to help them improve. The video advises viewers to ignore such negative influences to maintain focus and foster growth.

💡Innocent Critics

Innocent critics are those who may offer advice or criticism out of love or concern but may not always be right or helpful. The video script uses the example of parents who might push for a safe career, suggesting that while their intentions are good, their advice should be critically evaluated.

💡Sweet Talkers

Sweet talkers are individuals who offer excessive praise, often to the point of flattery. The video warns against relying too heavily on such praise, as it can lead to complacency and prevent personal growth, advising viewers to listen but not to take their words at face value.

💡Constructive Critics

Constructive critics are individuals who provide valuable and honest feedback with the intent to help others improve. The video encourages viewers to cherish and learn from such critics, as their harsh but well-meaning feedback can lead to significant personal and professional development.

Highlights

The importance of embracing criticism for success is a lesson often taught from childhood, but the method to do so is rarely explained.

Great leaders and change makers share a common trait: the ability to take and act upon criticism.

Chhatrapati Shivaji Maharaj was known for accepting criticism from all levels of society.

Elon Musk considers handling criticism as one of the most difficult aspects of his life, despite his ambitious projects.

The story of Dr. Ignaz Semmelweis highlights the critical role of criticism in medical advancement, despite initial rejection.

Dr. Semmelweis's simple solution of 'WASH YOUR HANDS' revolutionized medical hygiene and saved countless lives.

Criticism can be a double-edged sword, leading to either greatness or failure, depending on how it's received.

The 'magical feedback' technique by basketball coach Gregg Popovich involves asking three key questions to critics for constructive feedback.

Filtering through genuine feedback requires discerning between haters, innocent critics, sweet talkers, and constructive critics.

Haters criticize to pull you down and should be ignored for maintaining focus and growth.

Innocent critics may give baseless advice out of love, which should be thoughtfully considered but not necessarily followed.

Sweet talkers offer praise but their advice should be listened to with caution and not taken too seriously.

Constructive critics provide valuable, albeit harsh, feedback that should be obsessively worked upon for growth.

Discerning and processing feedback effectively is crucial for personal and professional development.

Criticism can be transformative; it's up to the individual to use it to build a castle of greatness or a graveyard of failure.

Encouraging viewers to like and subscribe for valuable content and support of the channel.

Transcripts

People did you ever notice that we all are told since childhood

that the habit of embracing criticism is the stepping stone to success.

But, nobody ever tells us how exactly do you embrace criticism ?

If you look at the greatest leaders of all time, the greatest change makers of all time.

The one thing you will find common in all of them

is their ability to take and act upon the criticism that they receive.

Chhatrapati Shivaji Maharaj, one of the greatest kings who ever lived in this country

was primarily known to take criticism from everyone.

For him it really did not matter whether it is coming from an ordinary villager or the prime minister of the state himself.

A modern day example of the same is Elon Musk,

you know what, Elon Musk was once asked at a conference

as to what exactly is the most difficult thing in his life.

Now, considering the fact that he is already doing crazy things like

colonising the Mars and making reusable rockets.

You would think that his most difficult thing would be related to

either one of these crazy things that he is doing.

But you know what he said, and I quote,

And here's where the question arises, as to why is this habit so so important

and more importantly, how can ordinary people like you and me learn to take criticism the right way.

To give you a deeper understanding of the same, I want to take you back to 1846, Europe.

For those of you do not know, this was one of the darkest times in the European history

wherein there was a major disease that was on the rise.

This disease was called the black death of child bed

wherein as soon as the mothers gave birth to their children

they used to die out of something called the Puerperal fever.

And just like the Covid-19 death toll today

there used to be a consistent increase in the deaths of mothers.

And even after years of research and millions of dollars into spending

no one could actually find out what exactly caused this problem.

But amidst all of this chaos, there was this one guy by the name Dr Ignaz Semmelweis.

He very openly started criticising the doctors and was screaming out the solution in every way possible.

And he did everything in his capacity to get his word out and prove the solution to the world.

But you know what, nobody listened to him and the entire society, especially the doctors

they called him crazy for decades.

And this poor man died in a mental asylum.

But you know what, after years of 'Research & Development'.

One fine day, after multiple references, the doctors actually tried out a solution

Guess what ? The Puerperal fever was gone like this

You know what his solution was ? It was a three word answer

WASH YOUR HANDS

As it turns out, Dr Ignaz had made an observation

that the doctors were doing the deliveries in the afternoon after conducting the autopsies in the morning

which is why the disease got passed on from the dead bodies into the mother's body

which is why even healthy mothers were dying out of the puerperal fever.

So all they had to do was wash their hands and instruments with Chlorine

and one of the deadliest disease in the history could have been eradicaed very very easily.

Today, Dr Ignaz is considered to be a legend and he is regarded as the 'saviour of mothers'.

But all throughout those years while the doctors were too proud to admit their flaws,

god knows how many mothers went inside the ward hoping that they would be able to see their babies

only to come of in body bags.

God knows how many children in that generation grew up without a mother

just because of the futile ego of the doctors who consider themselves next to god.

This is the reason why feedback and criticism is very very important.

This story also tells us that criticism is a double edged sword.

If taken the right way, it will lead you to greatness

and at the same time if not taken the right way, it will become the graveyard of your success.

So now the question is, in this big bad world while we have got only a few genuine well wishers

and on the other side we have got these dedicated haters who will go out of the way just to pull you down

and then we have got these people who often sugarcoat their answers just to keep their image

regardless of how pathetic your condition is.

How do you exactly filter through this chaos and take the feedback that really matters ?

The answer to this question comes from this book called the culture code

wherein Daniel Coyle talks about the method

which is used by one of the greatest basketball coaches of all time

who goes by the name Gregg Popovich.

And this method is very famously known as the magical feedback.

And you can use this magical feedback technique by asking three questions to your critic

Eventually, you will realize that you are getting constructive feedback.

These 3 questions are:

That's it.

Once you begin to ask these questions, automatically you will begin to receive constructive feedback from your critics

because these questions help the viewer navigate through both the good and the bad

and urges him/her to think about the new possibilites of improvement

which is what brings constructive feedback.

Once you get all these answers, it's time to jot them down

And work upon treating what works best for you and work upon what is not

Then comes the most important question of all

How do you exactly process this feedback

and how do you decide whom to listen to and who not to.

Well always remember, people, that there are 4 broad categories of people who will criticise you.

The first category of the people are the haters.

These are the people who will criticise you just to pull you down

and if you start taking them seriously it will mess up with your focus and stifle your growth.

So, block them both from your life and social media and it will work wonders for you.

The second category of people are innocent critics.

These are people who love you a lot but might sometimes give you baseless advice.

For example, your parents love you a lot that is why they might push you to take a so called safe career.

But you need to remember one thing; that their intent is never bad but their advice very well could be.

So, never ever take their advice without giving it a clear thought

If it makes sense to you, work upon it,

if not, learn to ignore it.

But the one thing that you need to remember is that you should never ever disrespect them

because today they might be giving you baseless advice

but tomorrow they could be giving you a sensible advice because ultimately their intent is not evil.

But then, if you begin to disrespect them

they might eventually stop giving you feedback which is very very bad.

With that we move on to the third category and these are sweet talkers.

These are people who will praise you so much that you will knowingly or unknowingly incline towards them

just to get validation.

And this is where you need to remind yourself that

"Ego is the anaesthesia that deadens the pain of stupidity"

I repeat

So definitely listen to the sweet talkers but don't ever take them seriously.

And last and most importantly we have got constructive critics

These are people who love you a lot and will give you feedback that might sound very harsh at the beginning

but is very very important.

This could be a professor who really cares for you

this could be your best friend or even your partner.

And you know what, never ever leave these people and always jot down what they say.

And sometimes they might give you baseless advice because nobody is perfect

but do make sure to jot down their criticism and work obssessively on it.

And once you start doing this, you will begin to witness exponential growth

in whatever aspect you're taking criticism for.

This could be your personal life, professional life and this could even be your own business.

And if you do this I am 100% sure that nobody in this goddamn world can stop you from achieving greatness

regardless of what you're doing right now.

And every time it gets difficult to gulp down a harsh feedback just tell yourself one thing

Criticism is that stone that people will throw at you all the time

but it is you who needs to decide to whether to build the castle of your greatness

or the graveyard of your success.

Now, let that sink in, and think about it for a while.

That's all from my side for today guys, if you learnt something valuable

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Thank you so much for watching !

I'll see you on Tuesday and have a wonderful weekend.

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