5 life-changing books you must read in 2024

Clark Kegley
2 Jan 202315:37

Summary

TLDRIn this insightful video, the speaker recommends five transformative non-fiction books, covering topics from happiness and relationships to self-improvement and financial behavior. 'Stumbling on Happiness' challenges our predictions of future joy, while 'The Surrender Experiment' explores letting go and embracing life's flow. 'The Way of the Superior Man' delves into masculine and feminine energies, offering relationship insights. 'The Most Important Thing' illuminates the impact of behavior on financial success, and 'The Body Keeps the Score' addresses the profound effects of trauma on our bodies and minds. The summary encourages viewers to explore these paradigm-shifting reads for personal growth.

Takeaways

  • 📚 The speaker recommends five books that can induce paradigm shifts in one's perspective on life.
  • 🔍 'Take Five Seconds' exemplifies how selective focus can lead to overlooking certain elements, like 'sleep', in a list.
  • 🤔 'Stumbling on Happiness' by Dan Gilbert explores our limited ability to predict what will make us happy and the flaws in our cognitive biases and decision-making.
  • 🧘 'The Surrender Experiment' by Michael Singer illustrates the idea of letting go and allowing life to unfold naturally, as opposed to forcing outcomes.
  • 💰 'Way of the Superior Man' discusses the balance of masculine and feminine energies within individuals and the importance of understanding these energies in relationships.
  • 💔 The book emphasizes the need to focus on self-improvement in relationships rather than seeking the 'perfect' partner.
  • 💸 'The Most Important Thing' highlights the significance of behavior in financial success, using the story of Ronald James Reed, a janitor turned investor.
  • 🎰 The script points out the misplaced priorities of spending on lottery tickets over building an emergency fund, especially among lower-income households.
  • 🏋️ 'The Body Keeps the Score' delves into the physical and psychological effects of trauma and how it is stored in our bodies.
  • 🏃‍♂️ Physical activity and movement are suggested as effective ways to manage stress and change one's physiological state.
  • 📈 The importance of understanding the psychology of money and adopting sound financial behaviors is underscored for long-term wealth accumulation.

Q & A

  • What is the main theme of the first recommended book, 'Stumbling on Happiness'?

    -The main theme of 'Stumbling on Happiness' is the exploration of how humans predict what will make them happy and the cognitive biases that affect our decision-making and predictions about the future.

  • What is the unique ability of humans that the first book discusses?

    -The unique ability discussed in the first book is humans' capacity to think about the future, which includes daydreaming, manifesting, setting goals, predicting, and worrying.

  • What is the central message of 'The Surrender Experiment' by Michael Singer?

    -The central message of 'The Surrender Experiment' is about letting go and allowing life to unfold with you, as opposed to forcing outcomes and being overly attached to specific life goals.

  • How does the book 'The Way of the Superior Man' define 'superior'?

    -In 'The Way of the Superior Man', 'superior' does not mean above others or women; it refers to becoming the most superior version of oneself, understanding and balancing both masculine and feminine energies within.

  • What is the main point of the book 'The Way of the Superior Man' regarding relationships?

    -The main point is that understanding and balancing one's masculine and feminine energies can lead to better relationships, as it promotes understanding between different perspectives and communication styles.

  • What is the significance of the story about Ronald James Reed in the context of the book about financial behavior?

    -The story of Ronald James Reed illustrates the power of consistent investment behavior in blue-chip stocks and the long-term impact of such habits, showing that financial success is more about behavior than starting with wealth.

  • What is the main argument of the book on financial behavior regarding the role of behaviorism in financial success?

    -The main argument is that behavior plays a more significant role in financial success than external factors like wealth or high-paying jobs. It emphasizes the importance of disciplined and informed financial behaviors.

  • What does the book 'The Body Keeps the Score' suggest about the relationship between trauma and the body?

    -The book suggests that trauma is stored in the body, manifesting as physiological responses to situations that remind individuals of past traumatic events.

  • How does the script suggest using movement to cope with stress and anxiety?

    -The script suggests that engaging in physical activities like running, walking, or dynamic meditation can help release stress and change one's emotional state, emphasizing the connection between physical movement and mental well-being.

  • What is the overarching message about self-improvement and self-healing in the context of relationships presented in the script?

    -The overarching message is that instead of solely focusing on finding the right partner, individuals should concentrate on becoming the best version of themselves, as this will naturally attract a compatible and high-quality partner.

  • What is the script's stance on the current discourse around trauma in pop culture?

    -The script acknowledges the importance of discussing trauma openly but criticizes the misuse of the term for minor inconveniences, emphasizing the need to respect the severity of true traumatic experiences.

Outlines

00:00

📚 Book Recommendations for Paradigm Shifts

The speaker introduces a list of five books that have the potential to shift one's perspective on life. The first book, 'Take Five Seconds', illustrates the concept of selective focus and cognitive biases, using an example to demonstrate how our brains filter information. The second book, 'Stumbling on Happiness', by Dan Gilbert, discusses the unpredictability of what makes us happy and our flawed decision-making processes. 'The Surrender Experiment' by Michael Singer is the third book, which tells the story of a man who embraces an Eastern approach to life, letting go of control and allowing life to unfold, leading to unexpected success. The speaker emphasizes the importance of both Eastern and Western philosophies in achieving a balanced approach to life.

05:01

🧘‍♂️ Embracing the 'Way of the Superior Man'

The fourth book, 'The Way of the Superior Man', challenges the traditional views on masculinity and femininity, advocating for understanding and embracing both energies within oneself. The book provides insights into the different perspectives of men and women, suggesting that understanding these differences can lead to better relationships. The speaker shares personal experiences of how the book impacted their views on relationships and encourages self-improvement as the key to attracting the right partner.

10:02

💰 The Power of Behavior in Financial Success

The fifth book discussed is about financial behavior and mindset, rather than just wealth accumulation. It tells the story of Ronald James Reed, a janitor who became a multi-millionaire through disciplined investing in blue-chip stocks. The book emphasizes the importance of behavior and psychology in managing money, contrasting the lottery mentality of many lower-income individuals with the long-term investment approach of successful investors. The speaker highlights the need for financial education and the impact of behavior on financial outcomes.

15:04

🏋️‍♀️ Healing Trauma Through Physical Movement

The final book mentioned, 'The Body Keeps the Score', delves into the topic of trauma and its physical manifestations. The author, with over 30 years of experience, explores how trauma is stored in the body and affects both mental and physical health. The speaker shares a personal anecdote about using dynamic meditation as a form of physical release to alleviate stress and trauma. The summary underscores the importance of physical activity in healing and the mind-body connection in processing emotional experiences.

📚 Reading Challenges and Continuing Education

The speaker concludes by inviting the audience to explore further reading challenges, such as a previous endeavor where they read seven books in seven days. They offer a follow-up video that summarizes each book and shares key takeaways, encouraging continuous learning and self-improvement through literature.

Mindmap

Keywords

💡Selective Focus

Selective focus refers to the cognitive phenomenon where attention is directed towards a limited set of information while ignoring other potentially relevant information. In the video, it is illustrated through an example where participants fail to notice 'sleep' missing from a list because it fits the context, whereas 'gasoline' stands out and is easily recognized as absent. This concept is used to explain how our brains can miss important details when they align with our expectations or preconceptions.

💡Stumbling on Happiness

This is the title of the first recommended book, which delves into the unpredictability of what makes us happy. The book argues that our ability to envision the future and predict happiness is flawed, often leading to a humbling realization of our limited understanding. It challenges the common belief that achieving certain life goals will inevitably result in happiness, suggesting instead that our predictions are often inaccurate.

💡The Surrender Experiment

This is the title of the second book mentioned, which tells the story of Michael Singer and his journey from a meditative hippie to the CEO of a multi-billion dollar company. The term 'surrender experiment' encapsulates the idea of letting go of control and allowing life to unfold naturally. The book contrasts Western ideals of goal-setting and hard work with Eastern philosophies of non-attachment and being present, illustrating a different approach to life and success.

💡Behaviorism

Behaviorism is a psychological theory that emphasizes the role of observable behavior and the environmental factors that influence it. In the context of the video, behaviorism is used to discuss how our actions and habits, particularly with money, can significantly impact our financial future. The video highlights the story of Ronald James Reed, who through consistent investing behavior, amassed a fortune despite having a modest income.

💡Dynamic Meditation

Dynamic meditation is a form of meditation that involves physical movement and expression to release tension and stress. The video mentions this concept as a way to alter one's physiological state, providing an example of how engaging in such activities can lead to relief and a better mental state. It contrasts the passive nature of traditional meditation with the active, expressive nature of dynamic meditation.

💡The Way of the Superior Man

This is the title of the third book discussed, which explores the concepts of masculine and feminine energies in both men and women. The book encourages individuals to understand and embrace their own versions of these energies to become the best version of themselves. It emphasizes the importance of self-improvement and self-healing in relationships, rather than focusing solely on finding the right partner.

💡Tax Evasion

Although not a central theme of the video, tax evasion is mentioned humorously in reference to a book on financial behavior. The video uses this term to highlight the contrast between common misconceptions about wealth accumulation (such as through illegal activities) and the actual behaviors that contribute to financial success, such as wise investing and disciplined saving.

💡Trauma

Trauma is a significant topic in the video, particularly in relation to the book 'The Body Keeps the Score.' It refers to deeply distressing or disturbing experiences that can have lasting emotional and physiological effects. The video discusses how trauma is stored in the body, affecting an individual's physical responses and behaviors, and emphasizes the importance of understanding and addressing these effects for healing and self-improvement.

💡Behavior and Money

The video discusses the impact of behavior on financial outcomes, suggesting that how one behaves with money is more critical than the amount of money one has. It uses the example of lottery ticket purchases to illustrate poor financial behavior, particularly among lower-income individuals, and contrasts this with the disciplined investing behavior of successful individuals like Ronald James Reed.

💡Self-Improvement

Self-improvement is a recurring theme throughout the video, with each recommended book offering insights or strategies for personal growth. The video emphasizes the importance of becoming the best version of oneself, whether through understanding cognitive biases, adopting healthier financial behaviors, embracing both masculine and feminine energies, or healing from trauma.

Highlights

Reading certain books can give you paradigm shifts that will stick with you.

Selective focus and flaws in our neuroscience are highlighted through an example involving the words gasoline and sleep.

Stumbling on Happiness by Dan Gilbert explores cognitive biases and overconfidence in predicting future happiness.

The Surrender Experiment by Michael Singer illustrates the concept of letting go and allowing things to unfold naturally.

The Way of the Superior Man by David Deida discusses masculine and feminine energies and how understanding these can improve relationships.

The importance of becoming the best version of yourself to attract the right partner is emphasized.

The Psychology of Money by Morgan Housel argues that behavior and psychology play a bigger role in financial success than having a high-paying job or a lot of money.

The story of Ronald James Reed, a janitor who amassed over eight million dollars through consistent investing, highlights the impact of behavior on financial success.

Behaviorism and misplaced priorities are exemplified by the high spending on lottery tickets compared to the inability to come up with emergency funds.

The Body Keeps the Score by Bessel van der Kolk explores trauma and its physiological impact on the body.

Dynamic meditation and other physical activities can help release stored trauma and improve mental and emotional well-being.

Exercise and movement are crucial for managing stress and improving overall mental health.

Learning about financial behaviorism can motivate better financial actions, such as investing wisely.

Understanding masculine and feminine energies can bridge the communication gap between genders in relationships.

Focusing on self-improvement and self-healing can lead to better relationships and personal satisfaction.

Transcripts

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here are the five books I'd recommend

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you read this year weird flex but I've

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read over 300 in the non-fiction space

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finances relationships self-improvement

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self-healing there's a lot of books out

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there that kind of say the same thing

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you know what I mean so I think if you

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take this list read them this year it's

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going to give you some Paradigm shifts

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that will stick with you

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book number one take five seconds and

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read the list of words in front of you

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now

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got it we good okay

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now which of these words was not on the

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list

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if you're like most it's obvious

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gasoline but there's another word that

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also wasn't on the list that one sleep

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if you don't believe me rewind five

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seconds and look at the list you knew

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gasoline wasn't on the list because it

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was so out of place but you didn't catch

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sleep because it fit in that example

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explained selective focus and a bit of

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the flaws that are wired into our

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Neuroscience behaviorism call it

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whatever you want we're learning a lot

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about it in the last 20 30 years in fact

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the first book I recommend stumbling on

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happiness goes over just that my

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favorite idea from the book is what

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makes you unique it's our ability to

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think about the future it seems so every

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day to you because you can do it but

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your ability to daydream to manifest to

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set goals to predict to worry anxiety

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right that's living in the future seeing

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things going wrong

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super unique to the human race it's

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estimated around 12 percent of all your

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thoughts throughout the day are related

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to the Future now a lot of us are using

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that prediction machine to try and

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predict what will make us happy well if

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I get a certain amount of money I'll be

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set if I just had more experience or the

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house or the job then you know then

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things will be happy one day so we're

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always trying to predict what will make

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us happy but what Dan Gilbert says in

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this book so brilliantly we don't

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actually know it's called stumbling on

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happiness but I think it should be

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called humbling happiness because it

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makes you realize how little you

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actually know and going over a lot of

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the cognitive biases and how our

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decision making is flawed and how we

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have overconfidence about our

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predictions of the future it really does

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humble you to another side of what it

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means to be human

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book number two what do billionaires

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hippies FBI raids and meditation all

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have in common they're in this book The

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Surrender experiment Michael Singer

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singer's got a crazy story literally was

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just this hippie who wanted to meditate

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in his van in Mexico and like be left

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the heck alone and slowly as his story

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unravels he gets a carpentry job and

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then he gets really good and then he has

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this company and then they start

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building churches and houses and

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construction and it gets bigger and

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bigger and bigger and then he gets into

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Computing and that gets bigger and

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eventually he finds himself I don't want

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to spoil too much here being the CEO of

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this multi-billion dollar company crazy

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story crazy book and why I'm telling you

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this why I recommend it so hard is a

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couple reasons the first is that it

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illustrates just that what does it mean

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to let go because here's a guy who took

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the polar opposite approach that a lot

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of like the West teaches with

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self-improvement set goals work your

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face off hustle and grind sacrifice the

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best years of your life for a future

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outcome but then there's the whole more

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esoteric Eastern approach which is just

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be in the present moment allow things to

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come to you don't be too attached let

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the universe if you believe this let the

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universe unfold with you and guide you

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have intentions but don't like force

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things because to the degree you force

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things it's like having a breeze on a

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hot summer day flowing through your

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house you want it to last forever you

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shut all the doors and all the windows

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and it kills the breeze of what you love

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it's the approach that this book talks

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about and so this book really turned my

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beliefs in my 20s on my head because I

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had been operating if you know my story

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from that Force energy for such a long

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time that was all I knew and then as

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soon as I got into my 30s you know I

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moved to Arizona I started experimenting

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with some more of this like letting go

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Eastern approach to things and I got a

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whole new batch of results and neither

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is better I do believe you need both

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this book really emphasizes what it

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looks like to let go to tap into that

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new camp the last note on this I would

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highly recommend you get the audible

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version because he's reading it and it

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feels like a mini course or a deep dive

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that's 10 hours long I put that on I

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went on a lot of walks I think I

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finished it in a week throughout just

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walking up and down my golf course get

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your 10 000 steps in and learn what it

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means to let go foreign

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this next book bit of a Funny Story it

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was a book I read in college and it blew

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my mind you know when someone connects

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the dots of sporadic areas in your mind

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and it feels like oh I understand this

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now like yes well this book did it for

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me in relationships I started being like

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well everyone needs this book you get a

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copy you get a copy you get a copy so I

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was given amount to like my friends my

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family to people I didn't really even

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know that well because it helped me so

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much and one of the people I gave it to

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dude it was a good book but there's some

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Chapters at the end like you sure you

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really liked it because it talked about

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ejaculating up the spine and I was like

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dude that was my favorite chapter I

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promise to never do that again this book

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way of the superior man superior man

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doesn't mean above others it doesn't

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mean above women it means the most

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Superior version of yourself even man is

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a bit of a misleading word because it

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talks about masculine and feminine

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energies which every single person has

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there's men with a very strong feminine

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energy and a very weaker masculine

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energy there's women with a very strong

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masculine energy and a very weak

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feminine energy in general what this

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book talks about is you have both men

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typically have a very strong masculine

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so they operate with a certain set of

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parameters rules thoughts and women see

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things through the feminine energy which

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is a very different world view the way

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to understand your woman is not

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necessarily through the masculine frame

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that's going to cause a lot of issues

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problems and it's like you're speaking

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English and they're speaking Chinese if

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you're speaking English and they're

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speaking a different language you don't

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even understand it I love this book

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because it goes beyond just 60 second

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Tick Tock or YouTube shorts of this

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whole like men versus women conversation

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it feels like every single video on my

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feed is just men do this and it sucks

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women do this and it sucks we're better

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nowhere better you don't understand us

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no you don't understand us with the

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occasional how to tell if your partner

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is a narcissist and they give you like

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five things that are so generic anyone

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is a narcissist so it plants it in your

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mind that oh I've dated narcissistic man

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I've dated narcissistic women it's just

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toxic and then the next video will be

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like women standards of men are too high

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the next video will be like don't settle

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for a low quality man oh dude can we

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stop fighting for two seconds can we try

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to understand and have a good

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conversation about this without just

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trying to go viral and get views as the

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currency it's very divisive and I think

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that it comes from a very jaded Place

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rightfully so like relationships cause

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so much pain if they don't go right and

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even if they're going right there's lots

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of pinging wrapped up in them there's a

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huge source of pleasure too some of the

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most pleasure you'll get in your life

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comes from relationships and also the

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other side of the coin so much of the

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pain comes from relationships a lot of

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people internalize that they get jaded

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and they fall into these extreme Echo

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chambers of people telling them what

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they want to hear and I think the one

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thing we want on both sides is for us to

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make a list of who we want and then to

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become that list literally writing down

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like 10 things you want in a partner and

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be that I say it in every video but stop

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trying to look for the right person and

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start focusing on becoming the right

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person

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um

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and I love that frame and that's why I'm

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such a fan of this self-improvement and

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self-healing work and what we talk about

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here on this channel and why you know

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you're watching these videos I I have so

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much respect for you because that is

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some of the best relationship advice out

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there is to be the best version of

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yourself because that's who you're going

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to attract tend to track tens when you

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raise yourself up to a level 10 person

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emotionally spiritually financially

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watch that person start to come into

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your life that's way better alright

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relationship talk over

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book number four we talked about love

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talked about happiness let's talk about

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money some moolah baby this book is all

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about Bitcoin and reading charts here's

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a book on tax evasion in all seriousness

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what makes someone good with money might

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be tempted to say having a lot of money

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or having a high-paying job so you have

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money to invest

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generational wealth not denying that

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those can't help

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but those play a smaller role than you

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think the biggest role that this book

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argues in your financial future how you

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behave this book got a ton of Praise

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when it came out it was a breath of

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fresh air in the finance space and I

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read a lot of financial books and I love

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that area a lot a lot of the books just

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are very logical like oh well you have a

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hundred dollars you need seven percent

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here ten percent here thirty percent is

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yours and 50 you know it's just like

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it's a spreadsheet download there's no

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emotion or stories behind it and so I

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think this book is very easy to digest

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very easy to read it's fun to read and

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there are some points that stuck with me

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it really stuck with me and my favorite

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idea is this story right here it's on

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Ronald James Reed this guy was a janitor

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lived in Vermont he was the first of his

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family to graduate not College not PhD

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but High School in in 2014 he passed

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away you're reading his Tombstone his

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obituary said Ronald James Reed was a

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gas station attendant a philanthropist

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and an investor three things that don't

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seem to go together most people would

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judge him and say was homeboy invest in

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his eight dollars an hour somewhere

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guess how much he was worth when he died

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the age of 92 a couple hundred thousand

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bucks no way that dude's worth a million

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no way very private guy lived very

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humbly so everyone was shocked just like

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you and me it was worth over eight

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million dollars left it to his kids in

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his local hospital pretty impressive

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most people like what was the secret how

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many lotteries did he win how many

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crypto coins did he get in on the

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ground floor and pump and dump the

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answer was super boring but again it's

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all about behaviorism he invested in

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Blue Chip stocks publicly traded

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companies he held them and he waited for

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decades about as boring as you can get

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no trust funds no generational wealth no

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high paying job literally the same

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resources that every single person has

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access to a good example of behaviorism

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and where we have misplaced priorities

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lottery tickets in only U.S spend more

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on the lottery than books movies video

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games combined the sad part is that it's

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mostly lower class people in America who

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buy them Ronald James Reid type his Camp

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you look at the data the lower the

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income class in general the more money

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they'll spend on lottery with the

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average being about 412 dollars a year

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per household now when also surveyed

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they said that 40 of Americans can't

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even come up with an emergency fund of

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400 in the case of an emergency and it's

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sad because what that says with the

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behaviorism and how we're operating with

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money is that we're blowing a safety net

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we'd rather not have an emergency net so

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we can take the behavior of a one in

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what smallest fractional chance that

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we're gonna hit big on a million yes

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there's education to it yes there's

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other factors but the biggest underlier

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is behavior so if you can learn and

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educate yourself on the behaviors on the

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psychology of money guess what you're

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going to be more amped to take those

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actions like Ronald James Reed who grew

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up in that camp that was a lot of ticket

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camps educated himself and started

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investing in Blue Chip stocks with over

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eight million dollars when he died at

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92. the next book was super dense super

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impactful I loved it but it's on a heavy

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subject the heaviest one you can write

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about trauma and that's a buzzword I

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think in the last couple years that has

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gotten talked about more and more which

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is a positive one of the Shadow sides of

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it is that everyone experiences trauma

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differently and some people say that

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they got cut off in traffic and it was

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traumatic I have so much trauma with

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ubereats sometimes I order it and they

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don't come the word trauma has taken a

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different meaning in pop culture but on

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the other side trauma is different for

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everyone the worst thing you've been

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through is the most traumatic thing

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you've been through a book like this the

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body keeps the score which is all about

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trauma and it's written by someone super

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qualified who has 30 plus years

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experience in this industry working with

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traumas studying traumas the effects on

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your body your mental emotional physical

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state absolutely fantastic and necessary

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to read favorite big idea from it your

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issues are stored in your tissues

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assault victims who even if someone gets

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close and tries to touch them they have

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a physiological response they withdraw

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maybe you got in a bad car accident when

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you're in a car you can feel the

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physiological stress of like tensing up

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like oh they're gonna hit me again you

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get nervous before a presentation you

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physiologically start to sweat profusely

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maybe a pit out maybe your stomach gets

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in knots so so much of trauma is stored

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in your body it's a physiological

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response in my 20s one thing that I

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learned through Osho the SC was a cult

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leader he had some great ideas besides

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the cult he had this thing called

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Dynamic meditation it was a series of

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bioenergetics but also this this

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meditation that wasn't just sitting it

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was expressing so you do like four or

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five of these movements one was like

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jumping up and down like oh

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another was a cathartic release

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you go as crazy as you can for a set

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period of time and I would just take the

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drums and go as hard as I can and

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wouldn't even worry about playing things

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right and it was a form of this Dynamic

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meditation it didn't matter how stressed

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I was how much in a low Vibe I was how

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much BS had happened in my life what I

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was going through I would go in there I

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would do a dynamic meditation and I

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would feel just complete Relief by the

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end you're good things are gonna be okay

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got that off your chest that's an

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example of using your physiology to

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change your state even something as

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simple as just going on a run going on a

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walk I mean when you're back from that

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don't you handle stress a little

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differently issues are in your tissues

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we're not meant to just sit hunched over

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for 10 12 14 hours a day some people are

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like oh I have so much anxiety and I

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feel depressed and then you look at

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their lifestyle and it's like well do

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you exercise no well when was the last

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time you like got out and moved and

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stretched and went on a run I don't know

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I don't really work out I don't got

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energy for it and then was something I

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realized is that you don't need energy

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to work out you get energy from working

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out from movement flipping that from oh

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I don't have energy to work out to no I

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get energy through working out the times

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I don't feel like it as soon as I'm done

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I never regret doing it and I feel ten

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times better if you're someone who likes

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reading books you like big Ideas videos

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like this you get things from them I'll

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link up right here a perfect follow-up

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video this is where I did a crazy

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challenge reading seven books in seven

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days but I summarize and give you a big

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idea from each throughout the days I

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personally think it's a fun video you

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can go watch that now and I'll see you

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there

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