Why Finding Purpose Is SO HARD Today
Summary
TLDRThe video script delves into the existential question of life's purpose, contrasting the monotony of routine with the relentless pursuit of success. It critiques the 'anti-work' and 'sigma grind set' lifestyles, suggesting both lack true purpose. The speaker posits that external distractions and societal pressures obscure individual desires, leading to a rise in issues like pornography addiction and suicide. Emphasizing the importance of internal reflection, the script advocates 'reaching the end of thought' to uncover one's authentic goals, thereby making life's challenges worthwhile and aligning actions with personal values.
Takeaways
- 🌏 The script discusses the growing contemplation about the purpose of life and the dissatisfaction with routine daily life and work.
- 🛌 It highlights the 'anti-work' crowd questioning the monotony of the daily grind and the 'Sigma grind set' which is focused on relentless hard work for future success.
- 🔥 The speaker contrasts the FIRE movement's goal of financial independence and early retirement with the daily routine of work and life maintenance.
- 🤔 The script suggests that both groups are searching for life's purpose but may be missing it due to a lack of understanding of what truly drives fulfillment.
- 📈 The correlation between a lack of life purpose and issues like pornography addiction and rising suicide rates is discussed, indicating a deeper societal problem.
- 📱 The role of technology in externalizing our attention and numbing our emotional circuitry is identified as a factor contributing to the loss of connection with our internal sense of purpose.
- 🚿 The shower is presented as a place of profound thought due to the lack of digital distraction, suggesting that solitude and disconnection from technology can foster internal reflection.
- 🧘 The speaker shares personal experiences from an ashram, suggesting that reducing external stimuli can help in reconnecting with one's internal voice and finding purpose.
- 💡 The concept of 'reaching the end of thought' is introduced as a technique to allow internal impulses and desires to surface by silencing the constant stream of external thoughts.
- 🚶♂️ The idea that self-discovery journeys, like long hikes or meditation retreats, work because they remove external stimuli allowing individuals to hear their inner voice is explained.
- 💪 The script concludes that aligning life with one's discovered purpose can make difficult tasks feel worthwhile and life more enjoyable, urging individuals to start this process as soon as possible.
Q & A
What is the central theme of the discussion in the transcript?
-The central theme of the discussion is the search for the purpose of life, the impact of societal expectations and technology on our sense of purpose, and how individuals can find and align their lives with their personal purpose.
What is the 'anti-work crowd' mentioned in the transcript?
-The 'anti-work crowd' refers to people who question the traditional 9-to-5 work lifestyle and whether it truly represents the purpose of life, suggesting that there might be more to living than just working and surviving.
What does the term 'Sigma grind set' represent in the context of the transcript?
-The 'Sigma grind set' represents a group of individuals who believe in working hard, often with multiple side hustles, with the goal of achieving success and financial independence as quickly as possible.
What is the FIRE movement mentioned in the transcript?
-The FIRE movement stands for Financial Independence, Retire Early. It is a lifestyle movement of people who aim to save and invest aggressively to reach financial independence and retire at a younger age than the traditional retirement age.
How does the speaker relate the rise in pornography addiction to the search for life's purpose?
-The speaker suggests that the rise in pornography addiction is correlated with a sense of meaninglessness in life. As life becomes more meaningless, people may turn to pornography as a way to escape and seek temporary dopamine hits.
What is the alarming statistic mentioned about suicide among Asian Americans aged 18 to 24?
-The alarming statistic is that suicide is the number one cause of death among Asian Americans between the ages of 18 and 24, which the speaker attributes to the crushing expectations and lack of a clear life purpose.
What is the speaker's view on the idea that a sense of purpose can be given to someone by others?
-The speaker believes that a sense of purpose cannot be given to someone by others; it has to come from within the individual. Even though parents or society may try to impose a sense of purpose, it fundamentally doesn't work unless it arises internally.
How does the speaker describe the impact of technology on our attention and sense of purpose?
-The speaker describes that technology has externalized our attention, causing us to focus more on external stimuli rather than our internal thoughts and feelings. This external focus can numb our emotional circuitry and make it difficult to connect with our sense of purpose.
What is the concept of 'reaching the end of thought' as discussed in the transcript?
-Reaching the end of thought is a technique where an individual allows their external thoughts to run out, enduring the initial boredom until they reach a state of internal clarity. This state allows them to become hypersensitive to their internal drivers, goals, and values, which can help them discover their personal purpose.
What is the practical advice given for someone who wants to discover their life purpose?
-The practical advice given is to engage in activities that reduce external stimulation, such as meditation, going on a hike, or simply sitting quietly and allowing thoughts to run their course. This can help an individual to hear their inner voice and discover their personal purpose.
What does the speaker suggest is the outcome of aligning one's life with their discovered purpose?
-The speaker suggests that when one aligns their life with their discovered purpose, they can tolerate life's difficulties more easily, find motivation to do difficult things, and experience an overall easier and more enjoyable life.
Outlines
🤔 The Search for Life's Purpose Amidst Societal Expectations
The script explores the growing contemplation of life's purpose, particularly in the context of societal pressures and routines. It contrasts the 'anti-work' crowd questioning the daily grind with the 'Sigma grind set' who believe in relentless hard work for eventual success and early retirement. The speaker also introduces the 'FIRE' (Financial Independence, Retire Early) movement. The paragraph highlights the lack of a sense of purpose as a common issue, correlating it with rising rates of pornography addiction and suicide, especially among young Asian Americans. The speaker emphasizes the importance of finding an individual purpose rather than adhering to societal expectations.
🧠 The Internal Quest for Purpose in a Technologically Distracted World
This paragraph delves into the idea that a true sense of purpose must come from within and cannot be externally imposed, as evidenced by the struggles of Asian American youth despite clear parental expectations. The speaker discusses how technology has led to an externalization of attention, causing people to lose touch with their internal voice. The paragraph also touches on how modern technology numbs emotional responses and the profound thoughts that can arise in places devoid of such distractions, like during a shower, suggesting that finding purpose requires reconnecting with one's internal thoughts and feelings.
🍔 The Illusion of Happiness Through External Validation
The speaker uses the metaphor of trying to determine food preferences without the ability to taste to illustrate the futility of seeking happiness and purpose through external validation. They explain how technology and social media numb emotional circuitry, leading individuals to chase after what they see others enjoying, rather than discovering their own preferences. The paragraph highlights the ineffectiveness of this approach, as it does not lead to genuine fulfillment, and suggests that the path to purpose involves tuning into one's internal signals rather than external influences.
🔍 Uncovering the Purpose Through Disconnecting and Introspection
This section discusses the role of boredom as a signal for the mind to seek external stimulation and how constant external stimulation suppresses internal signals. The speaker suggests that to reconnect with one's internal voice, one must reduce external input and allow for introspection. They draw a parallel between physical journeys of self-discovery, such as hiking or meditation retreats, and the process of 'reaching the end of thought,' which involves enduring initial boredom to eventually access deeper, more meaningful internal impulses.
💡 Embracing Individual Purpose to Enhance Life's Experience
The final paragraph emphasizes that the purpose of life is individual and not a one-size-fits-all concept. It suggests that once a person discovers their personal purpose, aligning life with it can make daily challenges more tolerable and life more enjoyable. The speaker argues against the 'anti-work' and 'grind set' perspectives, proposing that finding and living according to one's purpose is the key to a fulfilling life. They also mention a coaching program designed to help individuals find their sense of purpose, which has shown significant increases in clients' life satisfaction.
Mindmap
Keywords
💡Purpose of Life
💡Anti-work
💡Sigma Grind Set
💡Financial Independence, Retire Early (FIRE)
💡Mental Health
💡Addiction
💡Suicide
💡Externalized Attention
💡Influencers
💡Boredom
💡End of Thought
Highlights
Many people are questioning the purpose of life and rejecting traditional work-life structures.
The 'anti-work' crowd questions if life should be about repetitive routines and minimal personal fulfillment.
The 'sigma grind set' perspective emphasizes intense hustling and early retirement as a path to a fulfilling life.
Both the anti-work and sigma grind set groups struggle with a sense of purposelessness.
Pornography addiction and rising suicide rates correlate with a sense of meaninglessness in life.
Asian American youth face significant pressure and expectations, leading to high rates of suicide.
A sense of purpose must come from within and cannot be imposed externally.
Externalizing attention through technology numbs internal signals and hampers self-discovery.
Periods without external stimulation, like shower thoughts, can lead to profound personal insights.
Finding purpose involves reducing external stimulation and tuning into internal desires and goals.
Embarking on journeys of self-discovery, like hiking or meditation retreats, helps reconnect with one's inner self.
Reaching the 'end of thought' through sustained self-reflection can reveal one's true desires and purpose.
Once aligned with personal purpose, life's challenges become more manageable and fulfilling.
Purpose is not a universal concept but an individualized journey unique to each person.
Engaging in self-reflection and finding personal purpose can lead to a more meaningful and enjoyable life.
Transcripts
so it seems to me like more and more
people are starting to try to figure out
like what are we doing here like in on
this planet on this earth like what's
the purpose of life
I sort of see this manifest in kind of
the anti-work crowd where people are
like is this what life is supposed to be
I'm supposed to wake up every day at
seven a.m I commute for an hour work
until five commute home I exercise for
30 minutes cook for this amount of time
and then I have to get in bed so I'm not
burnt out the next day and it's just
like rinse and repeat until I die is
this really what life is about and on
the flip side we have like the sigma
grind set folks right these are the
people that are kind of like okay like
I'm gonna grind and like you gotta you
gotta grind to get ahead and you gotta
be an alpha and you gotta go Sigma grind
set you know that's really how you like
you make it in life is you have the side
hustle and you grow your side hustle
then you have your side side hustle and
you try to hustle as much as you can and
then if you hustle a lot then you can
become successful and you can get lots
of money and then like you can retire
early right there's the fire folks which
is financial Independence and retire
early so these are people who are kind
of thinking okay since Life starts with
retirement the goal of life is to like
step out of that grind as quickly as
possible make your millions that you can
enjoy life so instead of retiring at the
age of 60 what I'm going to do is try to
figure out how can I retire at the age
of 45 or 46 or 46 and a half and then I
can start living life so I'm going to
sacrifice the best years of my life so
that I can enjoy enjoy the latter years
of my life
and so I'm kind of listening to this
stuff and I'm trying to really figure
out what's the point of all of this is
life really about going to work every
day and kind of taking care of yourself
and working on your mental health and
working on your physical health and
learning how to cook and eating
nutritious food and then going keto and
going paleo and all this kind of stuff
until you die
or is it about grinding right is it like
side hustles and hustles and hustles and
hustling your way to an early retirement
so that you can really like start living
life to the fullest at the age of 52.
is this what's going on like what are we
what's happening here and these are two
different solutions either mentally
checking out of the capitalistic Society
because I reject this thing or
capitalizing on the capitalistic society
and leaning into that and I'm going to
try to maximize it and get ahead but
both these groups of people in my
opinion share one problem which is they
don't know what they're doing right
there's no like purpose there's no sense
of purpose in life people don't know
what we're on this Earth to do
and so they don't really know like how
to live this life and there's good
actual data to support this so if we
look at for example pornography
addiction pornography addiction is on
the rise and more and more people are
consuming pornography more people are
getting addicted to pornography and you
may say well what does that have to do
with life purpose well it turns out that
the variable that correlates the most
with being addicted to pornography is a
sense of meaninglessness so as our life
becomes meaningless we start to consume
more pornography because like we don't
really know what we're doing so I might
as well watch some porn and get some
dopamine and then I'll kind of like you
know it sort of passes the time
that's one example another example which
is really scary is actually suicide is
on the rise so we know that suicide is
correlated with a sense of
purposelessness in life right like what
am I doing with life there's really no
point in being here I'm suffering some
right now and there's no like end goal
that makes the suffering worth it
so why not just check out a life
so it's kind of scary but suicide is the
number one cause of uh death amongst
Asian Americans between the ages of 18
and 24 which is crazy right so if you're
like an Asian American kind of like I
was or I mean I still am but I'm not 18
to 24 anymore the the most dangerous
thing to you in life is actually you and
why is suicide the the number one cause
of of death for Asian Americans between
the age of 18 and 24. it's because this
is a group of people that is getting
crushed by expectation they don't really
know what's what they're doing in life
right so if you've grown up in the Asian
American diaspora you'll be kind of
familiar with this that you're
essentially crushed by expectations the
whole world usually your parents and
your you know friend group and stuff
like that they tell you hey this is what
life is about they're like look in order
to be successful you got to do this you
got to do this you got to do this you
got to do this they've got the formula
figure out you gotta major in stem you
got to work really hard you got to get
into a good college you gotta be at the
top of your class in college you gotta
go work get these really prestigious
companies or become a doctor or whatever
and then you will be happy
and despite the fact that these Asian
parents are pushing stuff on them so
much this pushing this formula for
success
what we actually see is that Asian
Americans are killing themselves at an
alarming rate
and so our society has lost sight of
what purposes like we don't really know
like what we're doing here and so since
we don't know what we're doing here we
have these like Sigma grind set kind of
people that are like I'm gonna do all my
grinding up front but is that really the
point of life no one knows what we're
doing here
and why is that
so the first thing that we have to
understand is that a sense of purpose
can't be given to you right it has to
come from within and if it could be
given to you then all the Asian American
kids would be doing great because their
parents are clearly giving them a sense
of purpose they're handing it to him on
the silver platter they're shoving it
down their throat they're saying this is
what you should do this is what you
should do this is what you should do
but that doesn't work fundamentally it
doesn't work right
and so then the question is okay like so
if it comes from within like what do we
mean by that right so if if a sense of
purpose comes to them like look within
yourself are we talking kind of like
Oprah book club like oh you gotta like
look within yourself and like you gotta
like like look so far within yourself
and see you find your purpose you know
is that kind of what we're talking about
well sort of but I think it's way more
scientific and way more like simple than
that it's not some weird deep spiritual
journey we'll talk a little bit about
that but it's like literally our sense
of purpose comes from within if our
sense of purpose comes from within then
why is it that more and more people are
losing sight of that well what's changed
in the last 20 years let's take a look
at it so what's changed in the last 20
years this is essentially an
acceleration of technology and what has
technology actually do so if we kind of
think about it what's happening in our
society right now the most fundamental
major change that has happened in our
society is that we have externalized our
attention
so I don't know if you're like me but
this is something that I absolutely used
to do so when I was in med school I
needed to optimize things right so I had
audio books I had like audio lectures
on my my my MP3 player right because
back then I had an MP3 player back in
the day 12 years ago and so what I would
do is I wake up in the morning and I'd
turn on some kind of audiobook or
something like that right like podcasts
or something and then I'd be like
cooking and listening to something then
I'd walk to the train and I'm listening
to something and then I get on the train
and I'm like reading something or maybe
I'm on my Kindle or something like that
then I'm at class and I'm paying
attention there and so every moment of
my day my
attention is externalized I'm listening
to a podcast I'm on social media I'm
playing a video game I'm watching
something even when I'm on the toilet
like the scariest thing in the world is
going to the toilet without your phone
right because like oh my God what are we
gonna do then
so if we really look at it fundamentally
what is the change in technology or what
changes technology rot in our brains and
on society it is externalized our
attention so a hundred years ago we used
to be like more attentional to our
internal stimuli and what's really
interesting is there are some places
where even technology has not figured
out how to break into so a great example
of this is shower thoughts right the
shower is the one place because if
things get wet then we can't take our
technology in there where we have these
really profound thoughts we think so
much in the shower and we start to make
all these like amazing realizations in
the shower
and why is that is the shower is there
something biochemical or physiological
about the Heat and the water or maybe
you take cold showers you know that that
sort of triggers all these profound
thoughts no it's actually like this is
the only time that we're able to be with
ourself this is the only time of the day
that we're actually able to pay
attention to ourselves
and so since we've lost touch with our
inner voice we don't really know what we
think we've struggled to find purpose
and how does that work so let me give
you all an example
so let's say I'm trying to figure out
what I want to eat
and I'm trying to figure out what kind
of food I like like what kind of food do
I want to eat in this world but imagine
for a moment that my tongue was
completely numb and I couldn't taste
anything where my nose was clogged
because 70 of taste actually comes from
your olfactory nerves but whatever all
that stuff is numb I got some covid got
some olfactory problems whatever right I
can't taste anything
and so then how do you imagine I'm going
to try to figure out what food I like so
what I end up doing if if my internal
senses are numb I'm going to look at
someone else I'm going to see someone
else I see oh wow they're eating a
hamburger that that looks great I'm
gonna eat that look at that litter
enjoying their hamburger they're taking
these big bites it's so juicy it looks
amazing and then I decide okay I'm gonna
eat a hamburger so I take the first bite
of hamburger I don't taste anything I
finished the hamburger I'm like you know
what that doesn't really work for me
so I'm going to look at someone else I
see oh wow that person's got some ice
cream look at that they're like licking
the ice cream it tastes it looks really
awesome it's so colorful it's got
sprinkles on top that looks totally lit
let me do that and then I try the ice
cream but I'm numb so I can't taste
anything and so what ends up happening I
go through life looking at what other
people makes other people happy and then
I try to duplicate it hoping that I
myself will become happy not happy I'll
enjoy the food right this is what
happens
and if we look at literally there's like
Neuroscience evidence of this that if
you look at what technology usage does
it doesn't matter if it's social media
video games whatever
it numbs our emotional circuitry it
literally shuts down our ability to like
be in touch with ourselves so we know
that playing a video game for even a
brief period of time will suppress our
amygdala and our limbic system the
emotional circuits of our brain we will
like literally suppress those internal
signals which is exactly why we use the
internet so when I'm feeling bad about
myself and I have too much work to do
and I'm feeling overwhelmed what am I
going to do to fix that I'm going to go
look at cat videos
is the second I open up a cat video I
suppress all of my internal signals and
this is precisely What's Going On We're
Going through life trying to figure out
what we want to do we're looking outside
of ourselves for possible answers we see
this person is enjoying a burger we see
that person is enjoying ice cream but
the whole time we are actively numbing
our tongue in our olfactory senses so
none of it seems to work and when none
of it seems to work this is how we end
up with people developing the sigma
grind set think about this for a second
okay people who are doing the signal
Sigma grind set and want to retire early
what are they actually saying they don't
even know what they're going to do after
they retire they don't even know that
they're going to enjoy retirement
but like think about that right because
you haven't retired you don't know what
it's like to be retired for five years
you think it's gonna be great because
you imagine all of these freedoms and
stuff but you don't actually know how
how that's going to work
I worked with a ton of people who've
actually retired and then what do they
do after two or three years they get
bored and they come out of retirement so
we end up going through life looking at
what appears to make other people happy
and then chasing after that
all the while numbing ourselves and this
is where we're particularly vulnerable
because if we look at things like social
media and influencers they play
completely into that right so how do you
become a successful influencer how do
you become successful on social media
you live the good life you demonstrate
to other people that I'm gonna be in
shape and look at me and I'm doing all
this stuff and like I'm ripped and like
I'm gonna like have lots of fun with my
friends and we're gonna go to the beach
and we're gonna do this and we're gonna
do this and like everyone's laughing and
everyone's like yeah like oh my God
they're living the high life and then
you're sitting at home you're watching
that you're like I want that too those
people are happy
social media completely amplifies this
this sort of idea that I can look at
other people and they are showing me the
recipe for happiness they're showing me
how to find purpose but it doesn't work
because we try to monkey see monkey do
we try to replicate what we see but it
doesn't seem to work for us why because
we're numb so the next question becomes
how do we un-numb ourselves and once
we're able to do that life will change
drastically right so if you can start to
taste again it can become really really
easy to figure out what you enjoy eating
all you need to do is be able to taste
so how do we actually go about doing
that so this is where we've got to talk
for a second about boredom okay so the
first thing to understand is like what
is the purpose of boredom so if we think
about it when we start to feel bored
what is our antidote to boredom our
antidote to boredom is usually some kind
of external stimulation so what does
boredom actually boredom is a
stimulation seeking emotional state
so our mind has figured out hey if we're
not getting the stimulation that we want
what I'm going to do is make this person
feel bored and once they start to feel
bored we are going to seek some kind of
external simulation which will then
relieve the boredom because as long as
we're getting stimulated from the
outside we won't feel bored furthermore
if we're getting simulated from the
outside what we're going to be doing is
suppressing all of our internal signals
so then the question kind of becomes
okay
how can I start
reconnecting with my internal signals
and this is where if you want to start
listening to your internal voice what
you actually need to do is Stop drowning
it out from the outside
so this is where we have to understand a
little bit about where thoughts come
from right so the thoughts in our mind
come from two places they can either
come from our sensory organs or
something like internally memory or
things like that so if you kind of think
about you know what are you excited
about today are you excited about seeing
a particular movie or playing a
particular game or eating a particular
food how did you have that excitement
where did that thought come from chances
are it came from a sensory organ and as
long as we are being bombarded by the
sensory organs it's going to be very
hard for our internal thoughts to
actually arise
this is further compounded by the fact
that oftentimes when our internal
thoughts arise they kind of like arise
in a negative way so the first thing
that comes out of our mind tends to be
kind of negative so if I'm sitting there
laying awake at night and like you know
trying to go to sleep
I'm not going to think happy thoughts at
the beginning right I'm going to start
to think a little bit about how much I
have to do I'm going to start to feel
overwhelmed so the other reason that we
want to numb ourselves is the first
layer of internal voice is usually
unpleasant it's negative emotions that
we've suppressed
and so what do we kind of do about this
and this is what's kind of interesting
is we kind of know societally that like
people will go and find their purpose
right and how do they do that well they
go like on these journeys of
self-discovery and they find themselves
so we know like this is not only a Trope
like people actually go and do this I
kind of did it right so I went to India
and I spent three months in an ashram
and we know that people will go on these
like year-long Wanderlust you know
sabbatical kind of things sometimes
people will take a gap year and what do
they do in their Gap year they like go
travel the world and they hike and they
go mountain climbing and all this kind
of stuff
and we know that once people do this
kind of thing they come back to life six
months later a year later their hair has
grown out they have a beard presumably
their dude sometimes women you know and
then they've got this like piercing look
in their eyes and they're like rugged
and they've like discovered themselves
and so let's understand that for a
second scientifically like wait a minute
so we know this kind of happens and even
within you there may be a yearning to go
find yourself
and then the question kind of begins
okay hold on a second what's the
mechanism to this what's the science
behind this why do you have to travel in
the Himalayas to go find yourself
because aren't you with you all the time
well the answer is actually no right so
in the world that we actually exist in
you're not with you in fact you have so
much digital stimulation that you're far
far far away from you which also
explains why you can go find yourself in
the Himalayas
so when you go hiking for six months
what happens to your indary as your
sense organs what happens to your
sensory input when you're hiking for
eight hours like you're not getting
constant sensory input right like you
just can't so sure you're seeing things
like maybe there's a beautiful mountain
somewhere or a lake or whatever but for
the most part you're kind of walking and
just being with yourself and so the
process of finding yourself involves
reducing external stimulation and as you
start to reduce external simulation
stuff starts to come up you get attuned
to your inner voice this is exactly what
happened to me in the ashram so I sit
there and I meditate for like eight
hours and like stuff starts to come up
stuff starts to come up stuff starts to
come up
and and this is also why people like
going on meditation Retreats because
when you go on a Meditation Retreat you
are with yourself and you were away from
the rest of the world you've unplugged
and when you unplug from the rest of the
world that's when you hear your inner
voice and so it's kind of interesting
because even this Trope sort of makes
sense right so what is the mechanism
through which going on a self-discovery
journey helps you find purpose because
there's got to be a scientific mechanism
right it's not just like a literary
Trope that is glorified in movies like
people actually go and do this
and the mechanism is that we get away
from this external stimuli so we can
hear our internal voice
and so if you're kind of sitting at home
and thinking to yourself well like what
am I supposed to do am I supposed to go
understand myself by going on a hiking
Journey if you want to go for it go for
it you can do like silent meditation
Retreats or whatever but we're going to
teach y'all just a very simple technique
today which is to reach the end of
thought
you may say like what does that mean
what is the end of thought so if you
close your eyes
what's going to happen is you'll have
thoughts right thoughts will arise
thoughts will arise thoughts will arise
and you'll notice a particular pattern
to the thoughts most of the thoughts
will be related to something external to
you they're not anything about what you
want they're about things that you're
going to need to do or they manifest as
desires which you may think is what you
want but that desire will also be born
of an external stimulus it's not
something that you care about you may
say I want to eat this or I want to play
this or whatever then what you're going
to notice is there's a period of intense
boredom where your mind is struggling
for stimulation and so you'll feel very
very very very intensely bored and
remember what is boredom boredom is an
attempt by your brain to get that hit of
dopamine this is why it makes boredom so
damn uncomfortable so if we think about
the sensations within ourselves that
prompt us to action that Force us into
action all of those Sensations are
uncomfortable hunger is uncomfortable
thirst is uncomfortable and so why does
our body make us feel uncomfortable to
bludgeon us into acting what's the
biggest Club it's got It's actually
boredom
so the second phase that you're going to
experience is intense intense boredom
but then something magical will happen
if you can make it through that phase if
you cannot give into the boredom and
once you know what the boredom is trying
to do you can start to have some power
over it
you will find that the thoughts are
going to be very rapid at the beginning
and then they'll start to slow down slow
down slow down slow down and if you're
lucky you will reach the end of thought
so how long does it take to reach the
end of thought it kind of depends
but once you reach the end of thought
because remember thoughts can come from
the outside then all you will be left
with
are the internal impulses what you will
have done is stopped numbing yourself
and actually will be
hypersensitive to internal drivers
internal goals internal values and the
cool thing is once you get centered in
those then you can start crafting a life
around them right once I know from
within me what I am looking for from
Life once I stop listening to
influencers or my Asian American parents
or looking at other people like my
friends or older siblings or whatever
and what they've done with their life
and instead of trying to duplicate that
I'm listening to myself then I can start
to align a life out of my values
and something really magical happens
there which is that once you discover
what you want from life it's not about
what is the purpose of life this is also
a misnomer there is not a purpose or
what is the purpose of life this is kind
of wild but it's my belief that the
purpose of life is not in life it's in
you it's individualized and this is like
the the big scam is that we're like
what's the purpose of life like let's go
ask someone really wise right because if
we ask someone really wise they'll be
able to give us the answer
but the whole point is that you're an
individual that you are living your life
and so if you want to make the most of
it you have to understand what you want
out of it
and so in order to do that reach the end
of thought
right you may say well practically how
do I do that do I sit there for a while
you can sit there for a while you can go
on a long hike if you want to you don't
have to reach the end of thought all at
once so you can sit there and go on a
10-day silent Meditation Retreat if you
want to you can go on a hiking trip
those are fantastic or you can just sit
down with yourself you know for a half
an hour hour whatever do I have to stay
in Lotus posture no you don't have to
stay in Lotus posture go for a walk and
just let the thoughts run out they will
run out of steam they'll be boredom and
then after that you'll discover what you
want
and once you discover your purpose then
you can start to align your life around
it and once you start aligning your life
out of purpose a couple of things happen
the first thing that happens is that you
are able to tolerate the difficulties of
life
so
why is it that it's hard to do hard
things it's because it's not worth it
right anytime there's a challenge if you
really listen to people what's the
resistance I don't know if it's worth it
or not but once you're aligned with your
purpose it will actually become worth it
right because now you know why you're
doing it now you can afford to wake up
at 6am every day because you actually
care about what you're studying this is
caring for life makes it so much easier
to live and so much more enjoyable so in
order to really figure out how to make
life easy I don't think you should adopt
the anti-work view of is this all life
is I think it's a good question
and I don't think you should adopt the
sigma grind set view which is just hey
let me work and work and work and work
and work so that I can be successful
later and then I can have this gravy
train like this pot of gold at the end
of the rainbow I don't think it works
I've worked with those people they reach
the end of the rainbow they enjoy
themselves for a couple years and they
they come into my office and they're
like I don't know what I'm doing with
life and then we go on this journey the
thing is you don't have to wait until
you don't have to sacrifice the best
years of your life to discover that
purpose is not Financial Security that
purpose is so much more you can actually
start that today in fact you need to
start it today
and if you can discover what your
purpose is through this technique if you
can understand this then so many things
will become easy I know it's not
practical for people to go to an ashram
in India or go hiking in the mountains
for 10 days which is exactly why we
built a coaching program our program is
actually designed to help people find a
sense of purpose and what we tend to see
is about a 58 increase in a client's
sense of purpose in life at about 12
weeks and what we've really found in our
Central hypothesis is that once you find
a reason to get out of bed in the
morning once you find a reason to get
off of the internet once you find a
reason to actually be motivated to do
things that are difficult for you that's
what actually makes it easy for you to
accomplish your goals
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