Exercises that caused a change in my aphantasia

Summary

The speaker shares a personal journey of overcoming aphantasia, a condition where one cannot visualize images mentally. They describe their initial struggle with mental imagery and the subsequent development of their ability to imagine in color after engaging in intentional exercises. The script delves into concepts like 'mindscape', 'homunculus', and 'sense calibration', outlining methods to improve mental visualization. It concludes with reflections on the potential neurological underpinnings of these phenomena, suggesting that the barrier between sensory perception and imagined sensations may be overcome with practice.

Takeaways

• 😀 The speaker has a condition called Fantasia, which affects their ability to visualize images mentally.
• 🧠 Despite having Fantasia, the speaker's image recognition and memory are unaffected; they can recognize faces and remember things well.
• 🌌 The speaker describes their previous mental imagery as being like the darkness of night with only the barest sense of shapes, lacking clarity.
• 🔑 An intentional process led to a significant change in the speaker's ability to imagine in color, though the exact mechanics are unclear.
• 🖼️ The speaker's mental imagery now is compared to a full-color screen with glare, suggesting an improvement but still not perfect clarity.
• 🌄 The concept of 'mindscape' is introduced as a term to describe the mental space where one imagines, remembers, or creates scenarios.
• 🕺 The process of 'virtualizing' is discussed as a method to improve mental imagery by imagining sensations across all senses, not just sight.
• 🤸‍♂️ The importance of focusing on sensations during virtualizing, rather than trying to create a coherent story or goal, is emphasized.
• 🔄 'Sense calibration' is introduced as a technique where one tries to match their mental imagery with their actual sensory experience.
• 🔮 The speaker mentions the use of chakra focusing exercises as part of their process to improve mental imagery, despite initial skepticism.
• 💡 The speaker speculates that the barrier between sensory input and the brain's ability to create mental images may have been weakened, allowing for improved visualization.

Q & A

What is the condition called 'Fantasia' mentioned in the script?

Fantasia, as described in the script, refers to a minor condition where a person is not good at imagining images. It doesn't affect image recognition or memory but inhibits the ability to visualize images or mentally map places.

How did the speaker's mental imagery change after 18 days?

After 18 days, the speaker's mental imagery changed from being unable to visualize images to being able to imagine things in color, albeit with a sensation similar to looking at a full-color screen with bad glare.

What is the term 'mindscape' as used in the script?

The term 'mindscape' is used to describe the mental space where all imagined scenarios, images, and memories are constructed and experienced, separate from the physical sensations of the body.

What is the difference between 'vessel' and 'homunculus' in the context of the script?

In the script, 'vessel' refers to the physical body, while 'homunculus' refers to the virtual self that exists in the mindscape, responsible for experiencing the mental imagery and sensations.

What does the speaker mean by 'virtualizing'?

'Virtualizing' is a term coined by the speaker to extend the concept of visualizing to include all senses, not just sight, in the process of imagining or experiencing mental imagery.

What is the concept of 'sense calibration' as discussed in the script?

'Sense calibration' is the process of trying to match one's mental imagery with the actual sensory experience as closely as possible, to train the brain to better correlate sensory inputs with the imagined reality.

What role do the 'chakras' play in the speaker's exercises?

The 'chakras' are used in the speaker's exercises as focal points for attention and energy flow, starting from the crown and moving downward or vice versa, to enhance the ability to visualize and sense the imagined reality.

How did the speaker's experience with binge-watching an anime affect their perception of language?

After binge-watching an anime with Japanese audio, the speaker experienced a phenomenon where they perceived English speech as if it were Japanese, indicating a temporary shift in their auditory perception due to the intense exposure to the language.

What is the 'homunculus fallacy' mentioned in the script?

The 'homunculus fallacy' is a concept where one imagines a tiny person inside their head that is watching their perceptions on a screen, which doesn't explain how that small person perceives what they're looking at.

What is the speaker's speculation on the connection between the sensory homunculus and the ability to imagine visual sensations?

The speaker speculates that the barrier between the sensory homunculus and the rest of the brain might be the same one that previously prevented them from experiencing imagined visual sensations, and that they are now navigating this barrier more effectively.

Outlines

00:00

👤 Personal Struggle with Aphantasia

The speaker begins by discussing their lifelong experience with aphantasia, a condition where they were unable to visualize images mentally. Despite having intact image recognition and memory, they struggled with tasks like mental mapping and imagining physical objects. The speaker describes the limited mental imagery they could produce, comparing it to the darkness of night with barely adjusted eyes. They note a significant change 18 days prior, where they gained the ability to imagine in color, although with a 'glare' that affects clarity. The speaker intends to explain the process behind this change, introducing the concept of the 'mindscape' as a separate mental space for imagination distinct from the physical 'vessel' of the body.

05:02

🎭 Embracing the Homunculus for Improved Mental Imagery

The speaker introduces the term 'homunculus' to represent the virtual self within the mindscape and distinguishes it from the physical 'vessel'. They emphasize the importance of 'virtualizing', or extending visualization to include all senses, not just sight. The speaker shares personal techniques for improving mental imagery, such as imagining oneself in familiar environments like a dance studio, focusing on sensations rather than a coherent narrative. They caution against confusing the sensations of the homunculus with those of the physical body, highlighting the need to keep the mental and physical experiences separate to avoid pitfalls in the practice.

10:03

🔄 The Concept of Sense Calibration

The speaker delves into the abstract concept of 'sense calibration', which involves aligning one's mental imagery with actual sensory experiences. They describe an exercise where they attempted to imagine their current environment accurately, comparing it to the act of taking a photograph. The goal is to enhance the correlation between sensory input and the imagined reality within the mindscape. The speaker also touches on the idea of 'sensory overriding', where one reprograms their sensory perceptions, but clarifies that their focus is on calibration for accuracy rather than alteration of perception.

15:06

🌀 Exploring Chakras and Their Impact on Mental Imagery

The speaker discusses an exercise involving the chakra system, which they credit for significant improvements in their mental imagery. They describe the chakras as non-physical points of energy within the body, and explain their locations from the crown of the head to the base of the spine. The speaker emphasizes the importance of distinguishing between the physical 'vessel' and the virtual 'homunculus' when practicing with chakras, and shares their method of focusing on all chakras simultaneously, moving attention from the crown to the base and vice versa. This practice, combined with calibration exercises, led to a breakthrough in their ability to visualize.

20:07

🔑 The Breakthrough in Visualizing Sensations

The speaker recounts the moment they experienced a breakthrough in their ability to visualize, describing it as a 'crack in the barrier' between their sensory and imaginary perceptions. They relate this to a scene from a book that sparked a mental image with more detail than they had previously been able to achieve. The speaker speculates on the neurological basis for this newfound ability, suggesting that the brain may have been processing visual signals even when they couldn't consciously perceive them, drawing parallels to the experience of dreaming and the phenomenon of visual static after staring at rain.

25:08

🌐 Theoretical Insights on Perception and the Brain

The speaker offers a theoretical perspective on how the brain processes sensory information and how this relates to their experience with aphantasia and subsequent improvement in mental imagery. They discuss the idea of a 'sensory homunculus' and an 'imaginary homunculus', suggesting that these are distinct and not directly related. The speaker also shares an anecdote about experiencing 'visual static' in their vision after a long period of staring at rain, hypothesizing that the brain was attempting to correct for the visual noise. They further explore the concept of the brain's subconscious processing of sensory information, using the example of not consciously seeing one's nose despite it always being in the field of vision.

30:09

🎧 The Phenomenon of Auditory Perception and Language

The speaker recounts an experience where they perceived English speech as if it were Japanese after binge-watching an anime with Japanese audio and English subtitles. They discuss the phenomenon of language recognition and how it can be influenced by recent experiences, such as becoming familiar with the sounds of a language through extensive exposure. The speaker reflects on the complexity of auditory perception and how the brain processes and interprets language, even when the specific words cannot be discerned.

35:11

🚧 Navigating the Barriers of Perception

In the final paragraph, the speaker concludes with a reflection on the barriers between sensory perception and the brain's processing of that information. They suggest that their improved ability to visualize may be related to a weakening of these barriers, allowing for a more effective navigation between sensory input and the brain's interpretation. The speaker acknowledges the conceptual nature of their discussion and the uncertainty of their theories, but expresses hope that sharing their experiences and insights will be valuable to others curious about the complexities of perception.

Keywords

💡Fantasia

Fantasia, in the context of the video, refers to a condition where an individual has difficulty in visualizing mental images. The speaker mentions having had a 'Fantasia' their entire life, which affected their ability to imagine images and spatial relationships. This condition is central to the video's theme as it sets the stage for the speaker's journey towards improving their mental imagery.

💡Mindsight

Mindsight is a term coined by the speaker to describe the process of visualizing or 'seeing' with the mind. It is a key concept in the video as the speaker discusses their struggle with and eventual improvement in this ability. The term is used to illustrate the process of mentally creating images, which is a significant part of the speaker's personal development story.

💡Homunculus

The homunculus is a term borrowed from philosophy and used by the speaker to represent the 'imagined self' within the 'mindscape'. It is a critical concept in the video as it helps differentiate between the physical body ('vessel') and the mental self that experiences mental imagery. The speaker uses the homunculus to explore the idea of self in the context of mental imagery and sensation.

💡Mindscape

The mindscape is a term introduced by the speaker to describe the mental space where one imagines, remembers, and visualizes scenarios. It is integral to the video's narrative as it provides a framework for understanding the speaker's exploration of mental imagery. The mindscape is where the homunculus 'lives' and experiences the exercises described in the video.

💡Virtualizing

Virtualizing, as used in the video, extends the concept of visualizing to include all senses, not just sight. The speaker discusses the process of virtualizing as a method to improve their mental imagery by imagining sensations of movement, touch, and sound. This concept is essential to the video's theme of enhancing mental imagery through sensory experience.

💡Calibration

Calibration, in the context of the video, refers to the process of aligning one's mental imagery with actual sensory experiences. The speaker describes an exercise where they attempt to match their imagined environment with their real surroundings, which is a key step in their journey to improve mental imagery. This concept is central to the video's exploration of how to train the mind to create more vivid and accurate mental images.

💡Chakra

Chakras are energy centers within the body, according to certain spiritual and philosophical traditions. In the video, the speaker uses the concept of chakras in a focusing exercise to enhance their mental imagery. They describe focusing on these centers, starting from the crown and moving downward, as a method that contributed to their improvement in visualizing.

💡Vessel

The term 'vessel' is used by the speaker to refer to the physical body. It is juxtaposed with the 'homunculus' to distinguish between the physical and the mental self. The speaker uses the concept of the vessel to explore the relationship between physical sensations and mental imagery, emphasizing the importance of separating the two in their exercises.

💡Sensory Homunculus

The sensory homunculus is a concept that represents the brain's map of the body, where different areas correspond to different senses. The speaker mentions this concept to discuss the separation between the sensory experiences processed by the brain and the imagined experiences of the homunculus within the mindscape. This distinction is crucial for understanding the speaker's approach to mental imagery exercises.

💡Imaginary Homunculus

The imaginary homunculus is the mental representation of oneself that the speaker uses to experience and interact with the mindscape. It is a concept that helps the speaker to explore the idea of self-awareness and self-representation within the context of mental imagery. The speaker's exercises involve strengthening the connection between this imaginary homunculus and the sensory experiences of the vessel.

Highlights

The speaker discusses overcoming aphantasia, a condition where one cannot mentally visualize images, and shares their journey of developing mental imagery.

The concept of 'mindscape' is introduced as a mental space for imagining scenarios, separate from physical sensations.

The differentiation between 'vessel' (physical body) and 'homunculus' (virtual self in the mindscape) is emphasized for effective mental imagery practice.

The process of 'virtualizing' is explained as extending visualization to include all senses, not just sight.

The importance of focusing on sensations within the mindscape, rather than physical reality, is highlighted to avoid confusion between imagined and real sensations.

The speaker describes 'sense calibration' as the act of matching one's imagination to actual sensory experiences for improved mental imagery.

Chakra focusing exercises are discussed as a method to enhance mental imagery, with the speaker sharing personal experiences of its effectiveness.

The speaker shares a personal anecdote of visual static in their vision after a long exposure to rainy window views, suggesting the brain's attempt to correct for visual noise.

An experience of auditory hallucination is recounted, where the speaker perceived English speech as Japanese after an anime binge, indicating the brain's plasticity in processing language.

The concept of the 'homunculus fallacy' is mentioned, relating to the feeling of being a small observer inside one's head, and its relevance to perception.

The speaker speculates on the neurological basis of mental imagery, suggesting that the ability to visualize might be an untapped capacity within the brain.

The process of 'calibration' is further detailed, with the speaker explaining how it involves synchronizing imagined movements with physical movements.

The speaker discusses the potential for the brain to process visual signals even when one cannot consciously visualize, drawing parallels to dreaming experiences.

The importance of practice and exploration in developing mental imagery skills is stressed, with the speaker's ongoing journey as an example.

The speaker reflects on the potential of mental imagery for personal growth and understanding, beyond the scope of the presented exercises.

The video concludes with a call to curiosity and exploration, encouraging viewers to delve deeper into the concepts presented for their own benefit.

Transcripts

foreign

so

that I'm kind of just recording this

with no script with only very Bare Bones

notes

I'm just going to try to get across all

the information I feel is necessary to

get across so

for background

for my entire life I had a Fantasia

which is a very minor condition that

doesn't really affect much basically I

wasn't very good at imagining images my

image recognition was fine I wasn't

dyslexic I'm still not

um I could recognize people's faces fine

and tell who I was looking at

I could remember things fine it's just

that I could not picture images which

among other things I'm pretty sure

contributed to me having a very very

poor understanding of like you know a

very poor ability to map like mentally

map the place I live

um like I couldn't really tell where

streets were or where they LED

I was very bad at that kind of thing

um and imagining a figure in my head

like any sort of diagram or like

physical object that I might be trying

to imagine like sitting on a table that

was pretty much out of the question the

best I could ever get out of my like

imagined Vision was

it was like what you see when it's the

middle of the night all of the lights

are out and your eyes have adjusted to

the darkness but not completely

it was very tenuous very

bad it was very bad basically

so that was true

up until 18 days ago

uh whereas now I can imagine things in

color

how exactly that happened I'm not

entirely sure on the mechanics of it was

mostly due to intentional processes it

was not entirely unexpected however the

amount to which it's changed is rather

surprising

as for what my like mental imagery looks

like now if I'm concentrating it's

kind of like looking at a full color

screen but with really bad glare

like the sun is out it's shining

directly on the screen you're really not

getting that good an image but you can

still see you can still see what's on

the screen you can see

you're not blind you're not blind to

what you're looking at

so that's basically the change that's

happened here and I'm going to explain

or attempt to explain how exactly that

change occurred and all of the like

steps that went in between where I

started and where I am now

so

I'm probably going to be rather

long-winded here because some of it is

like background background knowledge

some of it is like very

kind of

fundamental theoretical and Abstract but

like not in a not in a I've become a

master of my field way more in a

I'm still a fool but I can teach you how

to become a slightly wiser fool that's

where I believe I am right now

so

foreign this is also going to involve me

kind of just using a lot of jargon most

of which is

half invented

so just be prepared for that I'm going

to do my best to explain all of the

concepts because if I'm not being clear

then I feel like there's really no point

in relaying any of this information in

the first place so

the most basic concept that I think is

important to go over here is what I call

the mindscape now that's basically just

a

frilly formalization of like some of the

most basic stuff imaginable when you're

imagining an image or you're picturing

like what would happen this what would

happen that or you're remembering

something or you're imagining a scene

from a movie or you're making something

up you'd say that all of that stuff is

happening in your head like all of the

scenery is being like

put together

in your mind

so we're going to say that

in your mind is a defined place

just for the sake of like separating

that from attempting to imagine real

Sensations so we're just going to call

that the mindscape it's really nothing

like

kind of just a term that I want to have

so that I can have a slightly separate

word to use for this narrow use of the

concept

so it's relevant because a lot of the

exercises that got me to where I am have

to do with specifically

in the mindscape rather than

like with your physical body which um

the term I will use for that is vessel

you're going to have to separate your

vessel from the

virtual self that exists in the

mindscape which for ease of terminology

I'll also get the name I'll call that

the homunculus part of the reason I

chose the word homunculus is just

because I think it's a funny word

um

so

basically

the first thing that you're going to

want to try to do

the like first most fundamental step is

try to get good at

visualizing but if you're like me and

you're starting from a point of having a

Fantasia that's kind of categorically a

problem

I'd say more broadly what you're going

to want to try to do is virtualizing

which is just a coinage that extends the

term visualizing to include any sense so

touch movement sound Etc if you can

imagine pretty much anything in any

sense that's what you're going to want

to use you can use multiple at the same

time you can pick a favorite whatever

works best for you

however I found it to be most effective

when I imagined my when I imagined that

I was moving around the space like I

would imagine that I'm

when I initially started doing this I

was much more actively in dance classes

and doing a dance program so that's

usually what I would imagine I would

imagine I'm in the studio you know the

room with a Marley and the mirrors on

the walls and stuff like that and I'm

just moving around shimmying doing

whatever

one of the important things about this

is

it's important to focus specifically on

the sensations of this and not to have

any sort of goal in mind like even if I

was reciting a dance that I had been

rehearsing I generally didn't try to

keep it completely coherent and like

time flowing linearly and make sure that

it felt real that's not entirely a

fruitful exercise maybe if you're

getting really good at this you might

want to do that just as an exercise for

its own sake however I've never

due to my inexperience I can't

personally confirm nor deny whether that

has any eventual

practical applications so what I'm going

to say is if you're like if your goal is

to

stand in the kitchen and make yourself a

ham sandwich don't be overly story

driven

in your attempt to do that like if you

drop the knife on the floor make another

knife because

this is literally all in your mind

you make the rules so it is not at all

important to have a consistent and

sensical story flow and of course if

you're not very good at the at the

imagery side of things try to focus more

on

not seeing where things are not but more

just having an idea of what the space is

like because you can very much do that

if even if you have no visual sense you

can have a sense of the space

especially if the space that you're

working in is made up and can freely

warp to your uh liking

so

that's the first thing basically

virtualizing and getting used to the

sensations of

moving around and associating yourself

with the homunculus and

a really important thing a reason that I

specifically made this much effort to

differentiate the imagined self from the

physical one the homunculus and the

vessel is because a pitfall that I fell

into at many time like many times when I

was early in my practice of this stuff

was I would try to imagine a sensation

and I would get overly invested in

imagining it as applying to my vessel

like if I was imagining that like I

don't know I'm touching my leg then like

I would imagine that my homunculus is

moving around I'm using my arm to touch

my leg but I would get overly focused

instead of imagining that that sensation

is happening to the leg of my homunculus

I would start trying to make it feel

like it was happening on my vessel I

hope what I'm saying now is making sense

it's just that you're going to want to

imagine these Sensations as distinctly

not physical happening inside the

mindscape and not in

meet space

I don't know how common that word is who

cares anyways

it's

it's reasonable to say even though this

is probably going to be somewhat obvious

that this is not easy when you're first

starting out it's it's hard to

concentrate in enough of a way that you

can

sort of get immersed

I've recently been trying to kind of

teach some of my friends how to do this

and one of them described it in a way

that was very accurate to the way I

remembered how it felt when it was when

I was starting out

you get these brief Sparks of time when

you're very invested when you're

actually like when you feel like you're

really getting into it

most of the time it's very dull it's

difficult to imagine

it's difficult to like imagine in any

sort of detail

but occasionally you'll get that moment

where you feel like immersed

so moving on from this I like to talk

about

something that kind of follows from that

that's a little bit more abstract

I call it sense calibration

um basically

I'm the easiest way to give context to

this is to explain how I thought of the

idea it's kind of a basic idea but

basically I was

I was sitting where I'm sitting right

now on this couch and I was thinking

about another place in this house

and I was thinking what if instead of

doing that I imagined what I'm seeing

right now like I tried to imagine the

room that I am in right now and I tried

to make my imagine my imagination match

my actual like sensory experience as

quickly as not quickly as closely as

possible

so I call that calibration and not just

synchronization because theoretically

there could be other sorts of

synchronization one person that I was

talking to

um one person that I was talking to in a

group chat that I'm in said that they're

currently trying to basically

I'm going to give a very short

explanation of what it actually is but

basically the effort that they are

undertaking is to

reprogram in a sort of way the sense the

sensations that they take in from the

outside so that certain things when

perceived

appear different so that would sort of

be

um

sensory

overriding or something like that

reprogramming something of that nature

um whereas what I'm trying to do is

calibration basically it's where you try

your best to imagine exactly what you

are perceiving

and I feel like potentially if we're to

treat the

if we're to treat the

like

sensory intake from like that's coming

into the sensory organs of Your Vessel

and the imagined reality inside the

mindscape we're going to say that like

perhaps you would have like you would be

getting whatever part of your

neurology is in charge of correlating

those things more familiar with how it

correlates like

I didn't initially do this with visual

signals because even at the time that I

came up with this at which point my

Fantasia had lightened slightly I could

see now

I I still wasn't very good at it

initially what I tried was with moving

my body I would move around my vessel

and my homunculus in the same ways as

best I could so I would move around my

arm and I would try to exactly or as

exactly as possible recreate all of

those motions with my homunculus it's a

little bit hard you're going to have to

take it slow and you're going to want to

try not to do too much at once walking

you'll realize how complicated of an

action walking is

when when you have to teach a child how

to do it or two you have to try to

imitate it one to one

With Your Vessel and your homunculus

because so much of it is just built up

automatically because you've been doing

it your whole life that you don't really

think about the entire process unless

you're trying to really dissect it as

this kind of exercise would require so

what I was initially doing is if I was

walking I was walking very slowly like

almost one muscle at a time

like a bad quap player

and

I would occasionally also move other

limbs I would try to imitate the

movement of my head around the space and

at one point I synchronized I I tried

speaking and I tried to synchronize the

speech coming out of my vessel with the

speech that I was producing with the

corresponding parts of my body of my

homunculus that also is extremely

complicated because

nation is a very multi-faceted

complicated process I mean that's why

phonemes have to be described with words

like alveolar approximate instead of

just r

it's incredibly complicated and

intensely physical if you're doing it

more muscle by muscle it'll be easier to

wrap your head around

so

you might be pointing it you might be

noticing kind of a flaw in my like

storytelling in this video which is that

I kind of jumped from still completely a

fantasiac to can see a little

which did not happen

like on its own

uh that's because in addition to doing

the calibration stuff I was also doing

um

basically a chakra focusing exercise now

I'm not going to like accuse the people

in my audience of being hardcore

Skeptics or being unwilling to listen to

what I have to say just because I used

the word chakra it's just that I feel

it's important to note even for people

who are relatively receptive to that

idea or who have like done meditative

exercises involving the chakra system

before

I didn't

pull this out of thin air and I didn't

let anyone else pull it out of thin air

and give it to me

I'm only continuing to use this

terminology because in my experience I

tried an exercise that explicitly uses

it and then I got almost immediate

results

of course this isn't this wasn't the

first time I'd experimented with the

system but it was the first time in a

very long time and it was the first time

I had done the specific exercise I was

trying to do

and the fact that it caused such an

instant change means I feel like in

order to be responsible with the way I

teach other people about what happened I

feel like I have to

bring this up

so I hope that Preamble wasn't excessive

um

now that we've got that context out of

the way I'm just going to actually get

into it so

the chakra system as it's usually

presented in like

any article you would read or any book

that's pretty much what I was using and

it pretty much was what worked so

Crown third eye throat heart solar

plexus sacrum and bass now I should say

those locations don't actually

correspond to the organs they are named

after obviously the third eye is not

even really named after an organ that

you possess In Your Vessel

um those just happen to be good labels

for where they are roughly

so the top of the head the middle of the

frontal bone right here where you would

usually see a third eye drawn in an

illustration

uh

somewhere around the larynx somewhere

around the heart or perhaps a little bit

lower than that maybe around the

diaphragm the solar plexus nerve ganglia

that's pretty accurate somewhere around

the lumbar vertebrae or the sacrum of

the pelvic girdle and somewhere around

the pubic symphysis so that's where the

locations approximately are

like with any physical organ of the

vessel there's going to be individual

variation so basically you just have to

figure out you just have to feel it out

basically is the initial thing

it's kind of like figuring out where all

of your ribs are you can do that if you

like palpate enough on your own skin so

you're going to want to figure out okay

so I know that these there's these seven

points where does it feel like they're

located on my body and can I tell them

apart

now this is part of the reason why I

went into so much detail about the

homunculus versus vessel distinction

it's because the chakras are a

distinctly non-physical thing or to

whatever extent that they are a physical

thing that can be said to be related to

The Vessel they're not

physically distinguished enough and

perceptible enough that you should

really try to imagine it as a sensation

on the vessel you should imagine it as a

thing that is being experienced by the

homunculus though usually when I do this

sort of exercise I'm doing a kind of

synchronized or calibrated movement I'm

not generally moving my vessel around

much nor my homunculus so you kind of

assume that they're both in the same

position that they're both

if you want to use such language

superimposed on top of each other

in such a way that you could kind of

Imagine they're both doing the same

stuff so you can imagine them in the

places they would be on your vessel but

I guess it's kind of fruitful to

remember that they're not

here

they're not here they're

wherever that is on your homunculus like

I said before

I can give a pretty good description of

how the experience of this feels and how

it should be self-guided however I don't

know

much at all about the fine mechanics of

it I don't really have a good theory

behind exactly how any of it works I

don't really think that's important

right now if there is going to be any

sort of theory and I mean I certainly

hope so this isn't

I feel like there is a lot of useful

study that could come out of this but if

there's going to be a theory it's going

to have to be established slowly

carefully granularly

Etc that's a bit of a tangent though

I was going to say I'm not entirely sure

how this works just it's important to

have that distinction in mind or more so

to have already been using it in

practice so that you don't have to be

actively thinking about it in order for

it to be there and work in your favor

so

basically what I tried to do was

focus on all of the chakras at the same

time

I started from

the crown I moved in a caudal Direction

I moved downward why am I using fancy

anatomical terminology I move downward

downward from the top of the head then I

also tried doing the same thing from

from the base and upward I found a very

strange effect to happen at least after

I had done a little bit of this which is

that

I didn't really have to put much effort

into consciously feeling all of them

once I had like grounded my focus enough

on whichever one I chose to be first

which I usually did it from the top down

so I'm going to use the crown as the for

this for the purpose of this explanation

the first one

once I had focused my attention enough

on the one I was using As the First

I would move on to the second and the

first would still kind of persist in

that imagine sensation

like it would it would still feel like I

was concentrating on it it would feel

like there was some connection between

the two of them

I would also persistently feel that

there was a connection between whichever

one I was currently concentrating on and

the bass

I find that there's a little bit of a

weird like a weird difference in these

two methods like if you're moving from

the top down then the actively feeling

ones and the

like range where there's that kind of

electric feeling between the focused one

and the bass they don't overlap whereas

if you're moving from the bottom up they

completely overlap

that is somewhat non-pertinent and

theoretical however

I think that was kind of important to

note that I did do it in both directions

and I think the fact that I had done it

in both directions with enough Focus was

what caused the change because I was

thinking about this I was focusing my

attention on those places on my body I

was in fact sitting on this couch I

spent a lot of my time sitting on this

particular couch

and suddenly I realized that like my

homunculus I was imagining that I was

looking down at my body

and I realized that I could see it in

much more detail than ever before

like I wasn't intentionally giving much

visual definition but whenever I

attempted to imagine myself moving I

could

and that was what was very strange

because I had never experienced that

before I had never experienced the

ability to imagine such things except

when I was

literally falling asleep

which I'm not entirely sure what is

implied by the fact that when you dream

you can see because like that's always

been my experience I have perfect vision

and dreams but like not when I'm

imagining something while fully awake

until now I'm not really sure of the

mechanics of that either but it's

certainly a phenomenon that I observed

but all of this long-windedness to say

is that those exercises going down and

up and up and down is eventually what

led to a little crack in the barrier

between me and being able to visually

imagine a sensation

so

those focusing exercises combined with

the

combined with the uh calibration

exercises which I still do both of those

since this is a very recent development

and it's not like I'm going to suddenly

stop

um I mean I've got to investigate more

I've got to explore more it was the

combination of those two that led to

progress

I'd like to kind of end off the video

with a little bit of Theory a little bit

of my speculation on how some of this

works based on things that I've

personally observed

so

I was reading this book where there's a

scene where someone is taking a picture

of a shoreline there are a few

characters standing there one of them is

in the background standing on some rocks

I'm not going to give a full context

because it's not important what's mainly

important is the experience that led to

this observation

foreign

read that part of the book I had a sort

of scene in my mind now of course this

was less in the sense of being able to

actually see any of it and more in the

sense of having a sort of

wireframe theoretical awareness of where

things in the scene were

like like a person who is actually blind

being able to remember the layout of

their own house because they've been

through it so many times they know

exactly where everything is

and I realize now that I think back on

that with the ability to actually

imagine

visual Sensations

is that I don't think the scene has been

newly constructed it feels as if it was

already there

and I'm only just now able to perceive

the visual components of it because

if I'm able to

let's think about this from like a

purely neurological perspective thinking

of all phenomena as originating inside

the brain

even if the conscious even if the

phenomenon of Consciousness doesn't

happen inside the brain which is

something I'm not entirely clear on

it's still pretty clear that a lot of

the processes behind what goes into

forming a thought and what goes into

creating perceptions from just the nerve

signals that are created by the eyes and

the uh cochlear nerves and such things

they happen in the in the neurons

a lot of it is very poorly understood

but it's it it goes on in there or at

least that's the perspective I'm going

to take when I'm thinking about this

since I'm able to

see when I dream there must be something

going on in there that is able to

simulate images and there was already

something like that back when I was

fully a fantasiak or at least to

whatever extent I was

I could occasionally get the Vegas of

Sensations that just

wasn't really good enough to count for

anything

and of course I've always been able to

see my vision is perfect I'm able to I'm

not colorblind I don't have any sort of

concrete visual impairment I can see

what's in front of me

I'm I'm I I lack any disability in the

with vessel

angle of literally seeing what I am what

is around me and what is in front of me

so it feels like despite the fact that I

wasn't able to experience something that

I was imagining it feels like it feels

like a logical conclusion a draw that

there was already some sort of part of

my brain that was processing those

visual signals even if it wasn't able to

sort of break through to the part of me

that I consider myself that I that

experiences them this kind of ties into

an earlier concept that I had discussed

with myself for which I also used the

term homunculus these aren't really

the sensory homunculus and the imaginary

homunculus or like distinctly different

concepts I don't really think they apply

to each other but basically I I

formulated this concept of

there's this you that you feel like is

inside your head that's not actually how

perception works but it feels like it is

it feels like you're a tiny virtual

person watching your own perceptions on

a screen that kind of explanation

actually has a name it's called the

homunculus fallacy which is where I

originally took the name from

because that doesn't actually explain

how that small person would perceive

what they're looking at but

aside from that as a model of like how

it feels to perceive I think it's

valuable so

I observed one day when I was on a long

car ride

um that it had been raining for hours

and hours and I had just been looking

out the windows I had a book but I

wasn't reading from it I was just kind

of looking at the windows board

and eventually when we reached our

destination it had stopped raining or

actually I think it was still raining

but we went inside we went inside a

it was a hotel room and

I noticed that in my vision there was

static now visual static is kind of just

a com a constant presence for some

people and I think it's kind of fair for

everyone because

even though you have good Fidelity

Vision you or you are ultimately just a

very complex neural network processing

visual noise that gets processing

signals that are incomprehensible to

anything except your brain

so like

but this was different it was very

noticeable it looked like there were it

looks like there was TV static rain

falling constantly

and I pretty quickly put together that

I of course don't have any experimental

or even theoretical confirmation of this

but I'm very certain that it's what's

what was happening I had spent so long

looking out the Rainy window that my

brain had started trying to correct for

the noise that was created by the rain

kind of like how you you can always see

your nose your eyes are always picking

up the light that is reflected by your

nose you're always able to look at it if

you are thinking about it but it usually

doesn't come up you're usually ignoring

it implicitly and that's not a conscious

Act of ignoring that is a

subconscious or I guess pre-conscious

neither of those terms have very strict

meanings

it's a pre-conscious

phenomenon that the nose disappears from

your vision and I would say that in the

same way some part of my brain that does

the visual the visual processing was

trying to remove

the visual noise it was trying to offset

the signal created by the rain so it

created its own static That was supposed

to be opposing the rain it didn't of

course work because it's not a perfectly

engineered machine it can't predict

exactly what's going to come into its

eyes and yada yada but still it was an

interesting thing to see

fast forward to something else

one of my friends recommended that I

watch

um

I can't actually remember what anime it

was but they recommended that I watch an

anime and like a fool like a like a

foolhardy person uh which is often what

I am I watched

15 hours with almost no breaks

uh and I was watching the

uh I was watching it with subtitles I

was watching the original audio in

Japanese

and then I finished off a few more

episodes once I woke up the next morning

and I found that whenever I was

listening to someone talk and I couldn't

discern what they were saying it sounded

like Japanese

like I should probably be more clear

about what what that actually means

first of all probably part of the reason

I was able to experience this phenomenon

in the first place is because I'm like

an amateur linguist I'm familiar with

the phonotactics and phonology of

certain languages and Japanese is such a

culturally ubiquitous Language online

that I'm kind of familiar with it

whether I want to be or not and I mean

it's an interesting language it's not

like I try to avoid it but still I know

how it sounds I know how it sounds work

um

so

of course everyone experiences those

moments where you're hearing someone

speak and you can tell that it is speech

and you can tell that it is in the

language you recognize that's probably

mostly going to be qualifiable for

monolingual people like myself I only

speak English

um but presumably multilingual people

could also do a similar thing you could

recognize which one of your known

languages some thing your hearing is in

and if you have a good enough

understanding if you have a good enough

recognition of languages you don't speak

based on how they sound like if you

don't speak French but you can still

tell that something is French by hearing

it because it sounds like French

difficult to describe again but you know

people who know what I mean know what I

mean

you can tell that it you can tell that

it is what it is but you can't discern

the words so I might one day walk up to

like I might walk by the bedroom door uh

the the door to my brother's bedroom and

hear him talking with someone on the

phone and I'll generally be able to tell

oh he's talking with someone on the

phone and furthermore I'll be able to

tell oh he's talking in English now I

generally don't actually have to ask

that question because my brother is also

monolingual he only speaks English but

after that uh binge session

followed by a few more episodes of

basically torturing the uh recognition

parts of my brain into

I'm not entirely sure how it worked like

with a lot of things I've discussed here

I'm not entirely sure how the precise

process went but I walked by the door I

couldn't discern what he and the person

he was on the phone with were saying

and I knew that neither of them spoke

Japanese

certainly not with enough confidence

either to have a conversation in it that

appeared to be going rather fast paced I

opened the door

and it was in English because obviously

it was in English and I said to I said

to him

were you just speaking Japanese

and he said no

because of course he hadn't just been

speaking a language that he doesn't know

how to speak

but that's what it had sounded like I

wasn't able to point out Japanese words

which like I only know a few basic nouns

grammatical particles and pronouns but

still I had been able to pick out

anything but I also hadn't been able to

pick out any English words either I

noticed the same effect just a few

minutes later when I came back to my

computer and continued watching whatever

YouTube video I was watching

um

it was not recorded with a professional

microphone and it was of people having a

conversation so

there were a few seconds when I started

it where I had to kind of get back into

the flow of what they were saying

and after a few seconds it registered as

English spoken with uh Northern cities

Vowel Shift Regional accent like

basically the same way I talk but for

the first few seconds when I hadn't been

able to instantly put together the

things that that they were saying the

words

it had sounded like Japanese like

kind of hard to it's kind of hard to

describe even in like linguistic jargon

what exactly the difference felt like

but if I heard like for example English

has a has lots of consonant clusters

lots of consonants that come one after

the other without a vowel in between

when I would hear one of those I

wouldn't process it as an English

language consonant cluster I would

pronounce I would process it it would

come to my

self my homunculus my Consciousness as

already having been packaged as

syllables that are being reduced in the

way that they would be when spoken by a

Japanese speaker

like I said even the linguistic jargon

that I'm using kind of unclear

and this kind of this part of the video

is just an appendix anyway this is kind

of past the point of the actual stuff

that I was trying to make this video for

in the first place but I still find it

to be interesting and relevant

um so I feel like

basically

the barrier that exists between the

sensory homunculus and the rest of the

brain and the nervous system that's sort

of the same barrier that prevented me

from being able to experience imagined

visual Sensations and I feel like now

I'm navigating that barrier more more

effectively or it's no longer as strong

all of this is very conceptual and like

I said like I've said probably too many

times in this video that it's gotten

annoying not entirely sure about any of

it but I was requested to make I wasn't

actually requested to make this video

but I was requested to

take down some of this information put

it together so this is how I chose to do

it so I hope that the people who are

particularly curious about this find it

as useful as I have certainly found all

of the information

I believe that is all that I have to say

um

thank you for watching this um

grievously unedited and completely

unrehearsed video

I hope that the knowledge does you good

yeah that's about all