How the Nuclear Family Broke Down

The Atlantic
10 Feb 202005:17

Summary

TLDRThis video script explores the evolution of the American family, noting that the traditional nuclear family of the 1950s was an anomaly. It discusses how families were historically economic units and how the Victorian era saw the peak of extended families. The script highlights the rise and fall of the nuclear family, its post-war stability, and the subsequent cultural shift towards individualism and chosen families, especially among marginalized communities. It concludes by emphasizing the importance of love and care in modern family structures.

Takeaways

  • 🏡 The traditional image of a family as a married couple with two-and-a-half kids is outdated and only represented a small period between 1950 and 1965.
  • 📉 The concept of family has evolved from being an economic unit to a moral one, reflecting societal and economic changes over time.
  • 👨‍👩‍👧‍👦 In the Victorian era, extended families were common, providing support and preserving traditional values amidst societal and economic shifts.
  • 🏭 The rise of factories and urbanization led to the formation of nuclear families as young people moved away from home to pursue opportunities.
  • 🔝 By 1960, the nuclear family became the dominant family structure, influenced by social pressures and economic conditions of the post-war era.
  • 📉 Since the mid-1960s, the prevalence of nuclear families has declined, with increasing rates of people living alone, later marriages, higher divorce rates, and lower fertility rates.
  • 💔 The shift away from extended families has placed a disproportionate burden on less affluent households, who now bear the responsibilities previously shared by larger family units.
  • 👩‍👧‍👦 Women continue to spend more time on housework and childcare, reflecting an uneven distribution of domestic labor despite changes in family structures.
  • 🌐 Globally, a significant portion of the population still lives in extended family units, with large households common in some countries.
  • 🤝 The emergence of 'chosen families' in recent decades, particularly among marginalized groups, offers a new form of support and community.
  • 💕 The concept of family is evolving to include non-biological relationships, emphasizing the importance of unconditional love and care beyond traditional family ties.

Q & A

  • What is the traditional image of an American family that has been etched in our minds?

    -The traditional image of an American family is a married couple with two-and-a-half kids, often referred to as the nuclear family.

  • What does David Brooks describe as the 'cultural lag' in our perception of family?

    -Cultural lag refers to the outdated and archaic idea of what a family is, which existed during a specific period in history between 1950 and 1965, and is no longer representative of most American families today.

  • What was the primary purpose of a family unit throughout most of history according to the script?

    -Throughout most of history, the family was primarily an economic unit, designed to make the farm work or support small family businesses.

  • How did the family structure in the United States change during the Victorian era?

    -During the Victorian era, the number of people living in extended families was higher than ever before, as the extended family functioned as a moral unit, teaching children right from wrong and preserving traditional values.

  • What factors contributed to the rise of the nuclear family in the United States by 1960?

    -The rise of the nuclear family was influenced by factors such as increased wages allowing for single-earning households, women being relegated to household roles, high union membership, high church attendance, and high social trust.

  • What significant change occurred in American family structures by 1965?

    -By 1965, the stable and cultish nuclear families of the 1950s had been replaced by distressed families, marking the end of the post-war era's particular conditions that made the nuclear family stable and possible.

  • How has the share of people living alone in America changed over the past half-century?

    -Over the past half-century, the share of people living alone in America has doubled, reflecting significant shifts in family structures and societal norms.

  • What impact has the shift from extended to nuclear families had on less affluent households?

    -The shift has placed a disproportionate burden on less affluent households, who must perform all the work that was once done by members of an extended family, without the same support system.

  • What are some of the disadvantages of living in extended families as mentioned in the script?

    -Disadvantages of living in extended families include a lack of privacy and, in the past, women being confined to domestic roles such as cooking for large groups.

  • What is the concept of 'chosen families' and how did it emerge?

    -Chosen families are groups of people who come together to form a familial bond, often in the absence of a traditional family structure. This concept emerged prominently in the 1980s within the gay and lesbian community in San Francisco.

  • How does David Brooks view the creation of chosen families as a societal trend?

    -David Brooks views the creation of chosen families as one of the more hopeful trends in society, as it helps to share the challenges and rewards of modern life and promotes a sense of unconditional love and care beyond biological ties.

Outlines

00:00

👨‍👩‍👧‍👦 The Evolution and Transformation of the American Family

This paragraph delves into the historical and cultural shifts in the concept of family in America. It begins by challenging the stereotype of the traditional nuclear family, highlighting that it was only prevalent for a brief period between 1950 and 1965. The script discusses how the family unit has evolved from an economic necessity in farming and small businesses to a moral institution during the Victorian era. It then describes the rise of the nuclear family in the post-war era, facilitated by economic stability and societal pressures. However, it also notes the decline of this model from the mid-1960s onwards, with increasing rates of solo living, delayed marriages, divorce, and dropping fertility rates. The paragraph emphasizes the disproportionate impact of these changes on less affluent households and the shift towards chosen families as a modern alternative, providing support and a sense of belonging in the absence of traditional family structures.

05:03

📰 Engaging with the Atlantic's Insightful Conversations

The second paragraph serves as a call to action for viewers to engage further with the Atlantic's content. It encourages viewers to subscribe to the Atlantic Channel on YouTube for more thought-provoking discussions like the one presented in the video. This paragraph acts as a bridge from the content of the video to the broader range of topics and conversations available on the channel, inviting the audience to continue their exploration of societal issues and ideas.

Mindmap

Keywords

💡Nuclear Family

A nuclear family refers to a family unit typically consisting of two parents and their children. In the video's context, it highlights the shift from this traditional family structure, which was prevalent between 1950 and 1965, to more modern and diverse family forms. The script mentions how the nuclear family was once the dominant model, with nearly 78 percent of children living in such households by 1960.

💡Cultural Lag

Cultural lag is the phenomenon where traditional ideas, values, and institutions persist even after the conditions that created them have changed. The video discusses how society's perception of the 'family' is lagging, still holding onto the idea of the nuclear family despite significant shifts in family structures over time.

💡Extended Family

An extended family includes not just the nuclear family but also grandparents, aunts, uncles, cousins, and other relatives living together or in close proximity. The script explains that for most of history, families were economic units and extended families were common, providing support and preserving traditional values.

💡Economic Unit

An economic unit in the context of the video refers to the traditional family structure where family members worked together to support the family's economic needs, such as on a farm or in a family business. This concept is contrasted with the modern family, where economic roles are often more individualized.

💡Victorian Era

The Victorian era is a period in history during the reign of Queen Victoria, known for its societal norms and values, including the importance of the extended family. The script notes that during this time, the number of people living in extended families was higher than ever before, serving as a moral unit and preserving traditional values.

💡American Dream

The American Dream is the belief in the possibility of achieving a better life through hard work and determination. The video script mentions how the opening of factories in the late 19th and early 20th centuries led young people to leave their homes to pursue this dream, often forming nuclear families in the process.

💡Cult of Togetherness

The term 'cult of togetherness' in the script refers to the social pressure and idealization of the nuclear family during the post-war era. It describes a period when there was a strong societal push towards living in nuclear families, which was seen as the epitome of the American Dream.

💡Social Trust

Social trust is the confidence that individuals have in one another, which can contribute to the stability of social institutions, including the family. The video explains how high social trust, along with other factors like high wages and union membership, contributed to the stability of the nuclear family in the post-war era.

💡Chosen Families

Chosen families are groups of people who form close, familial bonds not based on blood relations but on mutual affection and choice. The script describes how the concept of chosen families emerged in the 1980s, particularly in the gay and lesbian community, as a way to create support networks in the absence of traditional family structures.

💡Privilege

Privilege in the context of the video refers to the advantages and benefits that certain individuals or groups have in society, often due to factors like wealth or social status. The script discusses how the shift from extended to nuclear families has been beneficial for the privileged, providing more freedom, but challenging for those who are less affluent.

💡Unconditional Love

Unconditional love is the idea of loving someone without any conditions or expectations. In the video, unconditional love is presented as a core aspect of what makes a family, whether it's a biological family or a chosen one. It's the bond that goes beyond transactional or voluntary relationships, offering care and support.

Highlights

The traditional image of a family as a married couple with two-and-a-half kids is outdated and only represented a minority of American families during a specific historical period.

Cultural lag exists between the old idea of the family and the modern reality of diverse family structures.

Throughout most of history, the family served as an economic unit, essential for the functioning of farms and small businesses.

Extended families were common and provided support in times of relationship failure or death.

The Victorian era saw families reach their peak in the US and Britain, with a focus on moral values and traditional teachings.

The shift to nuclear families occurred as young people moved to cities for work, leading to the rise of the 'cult of togetherness' in the 1950s.

The success of the nuclear family was contingent on specific post-war conditions, including high wages, gender roles, and social trust.

By 1965, the stable nuclear family structure began to decline, with increasing rates of people living alone, later marriages, and higher divorce rates.

The change in family structures has disproportionately affected less affluent households, who now bear the burden of tasks previously shared by extended family members.

Women continue to spend more time on housework and childcare despite societal shifts in family dynamics.

The transition from extended to nuclear families has provided more freedom for the privileged but has been cataclysmic for those without resources.

Globally, 38% of people still live in extended family units, with some countries having very large average household sizes.

Extended families of the past had disadvantages, such as lack of privacy and the burden of large-scale domestic work on women.

The creation of 'chosen families' emerged in the 1980s, particularly in the gay and lesbian community, as an alternative to traditional family structures.

Chosen families can help share modern life's challenges and rewards, promoting a more equitable society.

The concept of family is evolving to include non-biological bonds, emphasizing care and unconditional love beyond traditional ties.

David Brooks concludes that the shift towards chosen families is one of the more hopeful trends in society, offering a new form of connection and support.

Transcripts

play00:01

it's an image that has been etched in

play00:03

our minds a family is a married couple

play00:06

with two-and-a-half kids oh great dad

play00:09

yeah great yeah but today only a

play00:13

minority of American families are

play00:15

traditional two-parent nuclear families

play00:17

we're in a moment of cultural lag we

play00:20

have a an old archaic idea what family

play00:22

is it existed in this one freakish

play00:24

moment of history between 1950 and 1965

play00:27

so how did the nuclear family fail and

play00:30

what do modern families actually look

play00:32

like this is David Brooks he wrote this

play00:43

Atlantic cover story about the history

play00:45

of the family in America through most of

play00:47

history as family was an economic unit

play00:49

it was for making the farm work in 1875

play00:53

percent of American workers were farmers

play00:55

and most of the other 25% worked in

play00:58

small family businesses in the south of

play01:01

course slavery separated many black

play01:03

families but across most of society

play01:06

people lived in big extended families

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there were uncles nieces nephews around

play01:11

if a relationship failed if somebody

play01:13

died there were plenty other people to

play01:15

pick up the slack during the Victorian

play01:18

era the family reached its peak in the

play01:20

US and Britain I hope you are behaving

play01:22

very well the number of people who lived

play01:25

in extended families was higher in the

play01:27

Victorian era than ever before or ever

play01:29

since the world that people had known

play01:33

was falling away and they felt not only

play01:35

economically under threat they felt

play01:36

morally under threat so the extended

play01:39

family functioned as a moral unit in it

play01:41

children were taught right from wrong

play01:43

and traditional values were preserved

play01:45

then as factories opened in big US

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cities in the late 19th and early 20th

play01:51

centuries young people left home to

play01:53

chase the American dream the families

play01:56

they started were nuclear families by

play01:58

1960 the nuclear family dominated nearly

play02:01

78 percent of children were living in

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one you had what they called a cult of

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togetherness there was tremendous social

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pressure to live in one of these nuclear

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families

play02:10

but the conditions for its success were

play02:12

very particular to the post-war era

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everything conspired to make the nuclear

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family stable and possible wages went

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way up so you had men who could have a

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single earning household women were

play02:23

relegated to household you had high

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union membership high church attendance

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high social trust these independent

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people spend the profit from their labor

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to maintain the highest standard of

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living in the nation by 1965 that was

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over and the stable cultish nuclear

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families of the 1950's have been

play02:40

replaced by the distressed families of

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every decade since over the past half

play02:45

century the share of people living alone

play02:47

in America has doubled people are

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marrying later and divorcing more the

play02:53

general fertility rate is dropping and

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the stress from this change has fallen

play02:57

disproportionately on less affluent

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households who must perform all the work

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that was once done by members of an

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extended family this burden isn't evenly

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distributed women still spend

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significantly more time on housework and

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childcare according to recent data

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affluent people can afford to buy

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extended family the switch from an

play03:18

extended family who detached nuclear

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family has been great for those who are

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privileged it's given us way more

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freedom it's been sometimes cataclysmic

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for those who aren't but around the

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globe 38 percent of people still live in

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extended family units in Gambia the

play03:35

average household size is 13.7 people in

play03:39

Mexico many live within kinship groups

play03:42

of up to 70 people there are

play03:45

disadvantages to the extended families

play03:46

of the past sometimes you're never alone

play03:50

you don't get a lot of privacy and in

play03:52

the old days one of the disadvantages of

play03:54

extended family the women were stuck in

play03:55

the kitchen cooking for 25 people and so

play03:58

they have real downsides the most

play04:02

interesting trend of the past few

play04:03

decades is the creation of chosen

play04:06

families and this phenomenon really came

play04:09

to prominence in the 1980s in San

play04:11

Francisco in the gay and lesbian

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community people who have been cast

play04:15

adrift by the breakdown of the nuclear

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family they've lost touch with one or

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both parents and they're sort of

play04:21

floating and they come together

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and say you know we'll be a family

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together a chosen family can help to

play04:27

share the challenges and the rewards of

play04:29

modern life and make it more equitable

play04:32

we need to extend love to others and if

play04:35

we don't have a chance to do that

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something goes really wrong a family is

play04:41

a place where you offer care you offer

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unconditional love the bond between you

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is no longer transactional no longer

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even voluntary and we're seeing that

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spread not just in biological ways but a

play04:54

non-biological ways too it's one of the

play04:57

more hopeful things I see in society hi

play05:02

it's David Brooks thank you for watching

play05:04

and I hope you read my piece and if you

play05:07

want to experience other fine

play05:09

conversations of this sort go to youtube

play05:11

and subscribe to the Atlantic Channel

play05:13

and do it right away

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الوسوم ذات الصلة
Family HistoryCultural LagNuclear FamilyExtended FamilyAmerican DreamVictorian EraSocial ChangeChosen FamiliesModern SocietyDavid Brooks
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