Dating apps: How our brains react - 6 Minute English

Summary

In this episode of *6 Minute English*, Dan and Rob explore the psychology of dating apps, focusing on how our brains make split-second decisions about attraction, similar to in-person interactions. Science communicator Alice Gray explains how rejection, although emotionally impactful, is experienced differently in the online world, where rejections come more frequently. The hosts discuss how the speed of digital rejections can be hard to cope with, compared to the slower pace of in-person rejections. The episode highlights that one in three marriages in the UK now start online, showing the significant role of digital dating in modern relationships.

Takeaways

• 😀 People use dating apps by swiping left (dislike) or right (like) to indicate interest in others.
• 😀 The swipe action on dating apps is similar to physically turning a page in a book, but done on a smartphone screen.
• 😀 When using dating apps, we make decisions about whether we find someone attractive very quickly, just like in real life.
• 😀 One difference in online dating is that once you swipe left on someone, you won't have a chance to meet them again, unlike in real life.
• 😀 Rejection on dating apps happens much more frequently, which can make it harder to cope with compared to in-person rejections.
• 😀 In real life, people have more time to process rejection and recover, whereas online, rejections can be rapid and overwhelming.
• 😀 'Rejection' refers to when someone does not want to pursue a romantic connection with another person.
• 😀 After facing rejection, 'getting over it' involves processing the emotions and moving on, which may take some time.
• 😀 'Dusting yourself off' refers to staying positive after rejection, similar to physically brushing off dirt after falling.
• 😀 High rates of rejection on dating apps can be psychologically challenging, making it difficult to stay positive.
• 😀 The quiz question revealed that in the UK, approximately one in three marriages now start with a couple meeting online.

Q & A

What does 'swipe left' and 'swipe right' mean in the context of dating apps?

'Swipe left' means you don't like someone, while 'swipe right' means you find them attractive and are interested.

How do 'swipe left' and 'swipe right' differ from traditional methods of meeting people?

In traditional in-person meetings, you might take more time to assess someone's attractiveness and personality, whereas online dating apps prompt quick, instantaneous decisions.

What does Alice Gray say about the process of selecting a mate in real life vs. on dating apps?

Alice Gray mentions that the process of selecting a mate is quite similar in both cases, with both real-life and online decisions being made quickly, almost instantaneously.

What is one key difference between online rejection and real-life rejection according to Alice Gray?

The key difference is that in real life, you have time to process and recover from rejection, whereas on dating apps, the rate of rejection is higher, making it harder to cope with frequent rejections.

What is meant by 'dust yourself off' in the context of handling rejection?

'Dust yourself off' means to recover from a setback or rejection and move on, often with a positive mindset.

What is 'rejection' in the context of relationships and dating?

Rejection refers to when someone is not interested in pursuing a romantic relationship with you, either emotionally or physically.

Why is online rejection considered harder to cope with than real-life rejection?

Online rejection is harder because it happens more frequently, without the opportunity to engage further, while in real life, there is more time to process and handle it emotionally.

What does it mean when something is 'difficult to cope with'?

'Difficult to cope with' means that it is emotionally challenging or hard to manage, often referring to negative experiences like rejection.

What was the correct answer to the quiz question about marriages that begin online in the UK?

The correct answer is 'a) One in three.' This indicates that a significant number of marriages in the UK begin with couples meeting online.

How does the rate of rejection on dating apps affect users psychologically?

The high rate of rejection on dating apps can lead to negative psychological effects, making it harder for users to emotionally handle frequent rejections and stay positive.