70% разводов, разбираемся почему//Определяем степень удовлетворения браком

Summary

This video explores the rising divorce rate, especially among women, who initiate 70% of divorces. The speaker discusses how marriage has shifted from a necessity for survival to a platform for personal fulfillment, with modern individuals seeking happiness and self-realization. Traditional societal, economic, and domestic pressures that once kept people in unhappy marriages have faded, enabling more divorces. The video introduces the 'S + B + C' assessment tool—Sex, Household, and Values—as a way to evaluate relationship satisfaction and determine if a marriage is worth continuing. It emphasizes the importance of understanding personal happiness in the context of modern relationships.

Takeaways

• 😀 The divorce rate has significantly increased, stabilizing around 70% in recent years. This marks a shift from 50-60% rates in the past.
• 😀 Women are the initiators of divorce in 8 out of 10 cases, which suggests that they often define the level of satisfaction in marriage.
• 😀 Marriage has transitioned from being a basic survival tool (as per Maslow's hierarchy) to a means of self-realization and personal fulfillment.
• 😀 In modern society, individuals can financially and emotionally sustain themselves without needing marriage for security, unlike in the past.
• 😀 The societal stigma around divorce has significantly diminished, and economic factors like income disparity between genders have lessened.
• 😀 Modern relationships now face new challenges related to personal happiness, self-realization, and emotional fulfillment, which can cause marital dissatisfaction.
• 😀 The individualistic philosophy of modern life encourages personal happiness over group or familial success, impacting marriage stability.
• 😀 Today, people often seek partners for emotional satisfaction, romanticism, or even aesthetic reasons, rather than solely for security or survival.
• 😀 The rise of career opportunities for women, along with lessened economic dependence on marriage, has made divorce more accessible and less financially detrimental.
• 😀 The 'S + B + C' framework (Sex, Bachelors, and Compatibility) provides a clear method for evaluating relationship satisfaction. It focuses on three areas: sexual satisfaction, household responsibilities, and value compatibility.

Q & A

Why has the divorce rate in society increased to 70%?

The divorce rate has risen to 70% in recent years due to changing societal norms. Marriages no longer serve as a basic survival tool, as people can now meet their basic needs independently. This shift means that relationships are now evaluated on higher, personal fulfillment criteria, such as self-realization and happiness, leading to more divorces when these needs are unmet.

Why are women more likely to initiate divorce today?

Women are more likely to initiate divorce due to their increasing independence and ability to financially support themselves. In the past, women were often economically and socially pressured to stay in marriages, but these factors no longer have the same influence. Today, if women are dissatisfied with their marriage, they are more likely to end it.

What was the traditional societal view on divorce, and how has it changed?

Traditionally, divorce carried a significant social stigma, especially for women, who were often blamed for not maintaining the family unit. However, this stigma has largely disappeared, and divorce is now seen as a personal decision without the same level of public judgment.

What were the three factors that previously kept women in marriages?

The three factors that previously kept women in marriages were societal pressure (the stigma of being divorced), economic dependency (women had fewer opportunities to earn a living), and the traditional division of labor (where the household chores and responsibilities were divided in ways that were harder to manage without a partner). Today, these factors have largely diminished.

How has the modern workplace affected marriage dynamics?

In the modern workplace, career success is no longer contingent on marital status. The economic pressure to stay married has decreased as women have more opportunities to achieve financial independence and career success. This has contributed to the rise in divorce rates, as people feel less dependent on marriage for survival.

What is the concept of 'self-realization' in the context of modern relationships?

Self-realization in modern relationships refers to the idea that people now expect their marriages to help them fulfill personal goals, such as emotional satisfaction, recognition, and aesthetic enjoyment. This is a shift from the past, when marriage was primarily about survival and security.

How does the concept of Maslow's Hierarchy of Needs apply to marriage today?

Maslow's Hierarchy of Needs suggests that marriage, once at the base level of survival needs, has now moved to higher levels, such as self-actualization and esteem. Today, people expect their relationships to fulfill emotional, intellectual, and personal growth needs, rather than just basic survival needs.

What is the 'S + B + C' model for assessing relationship satisfaction?

The 'S + B + C' model assesses relationship satisfaction based on three categories: Sex (S), Household Life (B), and Values (C). Each category is rated on a scale of 0 to 10, where 0 means complete dissatisfaction and 10 means maximum fulfillment. This model helps evaluate the overall health and satisfaction in a relationship.

What do the scores in the 'S + B + C' model represent?

The scores in the 'S + B + C' model represent how well each category is functioning in the relationship. A score of 16 or below suggests that the relationship is likely to end, while scores between 16 and 21 indicate a crisis but potential for improvement. Scores above 22 suggest a healthy, satisfactory relationship.

How can couples work on improving their relationship according to the 'S + B + C' model?

Couples can improve their relationship by identifying areas where they score low in the 'S + B + C' model and focusing on those areas. For instance, if sex is a problem, couples might work on improving intimacy. If values or household roles are mismatched, they can work on aligning expectations and improving communication.