10 Secrets You Should NEVER Tell Coworkers
Summary
TLDRThis script offers a cautionary guide to navigating office politics and maintaining a professional reputation. It warns against sharing sensitive information, such as personal secrets, mistakes, and career ambitions, which can become fodder for gossip and undermine one's standing. The narrative uses anecdotes to illustrate the consequences of office indiscretions and provides strategies for dealing with toxic co-workers. The key takeaway is the importance of discretion and the five rules to win at office politics without engaging in dirty tactics.
Takeaways
- 🤐 **Maintain Confidentiality**: Avoid discussing sensitive or personal information with colleagues to prevent becoming the subject of office gossip.
- 🗣️ **Be Cautious with Insider Information**: Sharing insider information can backfire and damage your professional reputation.
- 👥 **Avoid Office Gossip**: Engaging in or spreading gossip can lead to unnecessary drama and harm your relationships with co-workers.
- 🤫 **Keep Personal Life Private**: Limiting personal information shared at work can prevent it from becoming office gossip and affecting your professional image.
- 💸 **Financial Matters Stay Private**: Disclosing financial details can influence how colleagues perceive you and may lead to unfair treatment.
- 🙅♀️ **Don't Admit to Mistakes Unnecessarily**: If a mistake goes unnoticed, there's no need to draw attention to it, as it can be used against you.
- 🤷♀️ **Don't Feed the Drama**: Refrain from sharing personal struggles or health issues to prevent them from becoming office gossip.
- 🏆 **Ambition Should Be Kept Discreet**: Publicly announcing career ambitions can invite unnecessary competition and sabotage.
- 🤝 **Handle Toxic Co-workers with Kindness**: Using positive reinforcement can disarm toxic behavior and maintain a peaceful work environment.
- 🛡️ **Protect Career Opportunities**: Keep career-advancing opportunities confidential to avoid dirty politics and potential sabotage.
Q & A
Why should you avoid discussing secrets with co-workers?
-Discussing secrets with co-workers can lead to office gossip, workplace drama, and damage to your professional reputation. It can also make you a target for those who might use the information against you.
What was the consequence of Vivian sharing insider information at her company?
-Vivian's sharing of insider information led to a loss of trust from her boss, a decrease in her influence within the company, and avoidance from her colleagues.
Why is it unwise to confirm or deny rumors about your personal life at work?
-Confirming or denying rumors can fuel office gossip and provide ammunition to those who might use it against you. It's better to discredit the gossip and not engage with it.
What is the advice given for dealing with toxic co-workers like Vivian?
-The advice is to be kind and make yourself easy to work with, which can disarm toxic co-workers. Avoid engaging in their drama and let karma handle the situation.
Why should you not share your personal life details with co-workers?
-Sharing personal life details can lead to unnecessary speculation and gossip, which can be used against you by toxic co-workers. It's best to keep personal matters private.
What is the recommended approach when dealing with personal health issues at work?
-Only share personal health information on a need-to-know basis, especially with supervisors if it affects your work performance, but avoid sharing with co-workers who might misuse the information.
How can discussing your financial situation at work potentially harm your professional image?
-Discussing financial matters can lead to perceptions of irresponsibility or undeserved privilege, which can affect promotions, pay increases, and career opportunities.
What is the suggested strategy for handling career ambitions and opportunities at work?
-Keep your career ambitions and opportunities confidential, sharing them only with those who can help you advance, and avoid broadcasting them to avoid creating unnecessary competition or gossip.
Why is it important to be cautious about discussing your mistakes at work?
-Discussing your mistakes can provide fuel for gossip and drama, and it can also undermine your professional image. It's better to learn from mistakes privately.
What is the key takeaway from the story about the client who shared her credit card debt with co-workers?
-The key takeaway is that sharing sensitive financial information can have negative professional repercussions, as it may be used against you or lead to harmful gossip.
How can keeping secrets at work help in navigating office politics?
-Keeping secrets can prevent you from becoming a target in office politics and can help maintain a professional image. It's also a part of the broader strategy to win office politics without engaging in dirty tactics.
Outlines
🤐 The Dangers of Sharing Secrets at Work
This paragraph emphasizes the risks of discussing sensitive information with co-workers, as it can lead to gossip, workplace drama, and damage to one's professional reputation. It highlights the importance of discretion and caution when handling confidential information. The story of Vivian, who shared insider information that led to her downfall, serves as a cautionary tale. The speaker advises against sharing secrets, including personal and professional ones, to avoid becoming a target for office gossip and to prevent adversaries from using that information against you.
🤫 Maintaining Professional Boundaries in the Workplace
The second paragraph discusses the importance of setting boundaries between personal and professional life at work. It suggests that one should be cautious about sharing personal details, including health and financial information, with co-workers to prevent unnecessary speculation and potential misuse by colleagues. The speaker shares personal experiences and provides advice on how to handle such situations, advocating for a 'need-to-know' basis when it comes to sharing personal information. It also touches on the potential negative consequences of openly discussing career ambitions and financial status at work, urging professionals to be mindful of the information they disclose.
Mindmap
Keywords
💡Office Gossip
💡Professional Reputation
💡Confidentiality
💡Workplace Drama
💡Personal Life
💡Career Ambitions
💡Toxic Co-workers
💡Office Politics
💡Financial Disclosure
💡Health Information
💡Career Opportunities
Highlights
Sharing secrets at work can lead to office gossip and damage your professional reputation.
Many people unknowingly reveal secrets to co-workers, which can have negative consequences.
Vivian's story illustrates the downfall that can come from sharing insider information.
Office gossip can escalate and lead to the loss of trust and power within a company.
It's crucial not to share others' secrets to avoid being burned by office politics.
Personal relationships at work can lead to rumors and speculation.
Rumors can be harmful and difficult to disprove once they spread in the workplace.
Gossip can be used as a tool by toxic co-workers to create drama and undermine others.
Maintaining kindness and professionalism can disarm toxic co-workers.
Avoid broadcasting personal mistakes at work to prevent them from becoming gossip fodder.
Personal life details should be kept private to avoid becoming the subject of office gossip.
Health information, whether physical or mental, should be shared on a need-to-know basis only.
Financial details, such as debt or savings, should be kept confidential to prevent judgment and gossip.
Ambitions and career goals should be shared only with those who can help advance your career.
Promotions and career opportunities should be kept quiet to avoid triggering dirty politics.
Engaging in office politics doesn't have to be dirty or complicated; there are rules to win gracefully.
Transcripts
your co-workers cannot talk about things
they don't know feeling just one of
these secrets will make you the target
of office gossip the subject of
workplace drama and destroy your
professional reputation yet I can
guarantee you've probably told your
co-workers at least three of these
secrets because most people never learn
the 10 Secrets they should never tell
their co-workers until it's too late but
I got you bestie and I'm spilling the
tea today so you don't accidentally
spill it on yourself we have to start
with the obvious fact that you are not
the only one spilling Secrets at work
undoubtedly you have at least one
co-worker or even your boss who is
confided in you what do you do with that
information my office Nemesis made a
mistake with this information back in my
corporate days Vivian had gotten a juicy
political Insight from her boss who was
the top executive at the company one of
the executives was about to get fired
Vivian not only wanted to show she was
in the know she happened to openly hate
this executive and welcome to the
opportunity to bring him down but this
was the beginning of Vivian's downfall
wish Loki I enjoyed watching Karma do it
job Vivian shared her Insider
information with a few people that she
wanted to impress then it became the
buzz of office gossip and fell into the
wrong hands Vivian was a notorious
corporate pygmy and she had created a
collection of adversaries which is cool
I wasn't alone now one of these
adversaries saw this mishandled
information as the perfect political
opportunity to take Vivian down the top
executive was made aware of the fact
that Vivian betrayed his confidence and
instantly the trustee had in Vivian was
decimated and the precarious amount of
power she was provided was lost which
made everyone of the company avoid
Vivian the way they would stepping into
one of those weird puddles that happens
in the middle of the day in New York
City I don't even know what's going on
with those when you spill someone else's
secret you are going to be the one who
ends up burned so don't do it which
brings me to the next secret you should
never tell your co-workers and another
pygmy tale because apparently it's our
theme for today this one was targeted at
me at one of my early career jobs my
work bestie happen to be a dude we will
not get all toxic and call him my work
husband anyways me and my work bestie
took breaks together and he initiated a
strategic high impact project that
promoted my team Services which was a
huge Mutual win we also both happened to
be in serious long-term relationships
with people outside of work so there was
no romantic Vibes one day I was chatting
with another one of our colleagues let's
call our Gia because she had the mean
girl from Full House Vibes going and she
says to me you know people think you and
him are hooking up was this rumor really
floating around probably because a woman
can't be friends with a man at work
without people speculating about it but
also because I suspect Gia or remember
of her pygmy pack started it heck she
probably brought it to me so she could
add it to the office gossip because
beyond that there was zero point in her
bringing it to me there was also nothing
I could do or say to prove that me and
my work bestie were not in fact having a
torrid love affair if you're truly
concerned about what is being said
behind a co-worker's back do not bring
it to them discredit the person who's
gossiping about them instead question as
I told you about Gia and Vivian have you
been assuming that they knew I didn't
like them the thing is neither of them
knew at least not explicitly unlike Gia
and Vivian despite my personal feelings
about them I wasn't trying to take
anyone down even when their behavior was
particularly shady I trusted Karma to do
its job so I could do mine them knowing
I didn't like them would have added fuel
to their pikmi fire and it would have
escalated the drama I did not want I
even channeled Pavlov and used positive
reinforcement with them especially
Vivian nothing disarms a toxic co-worker
faster than kindness especially when
it's not what they're giving you
whenever I had to collaborate with
Vivian I made myself conspicuously easy
to work with making it almost impossible
for her to sabotage my work or obstruct
my work in any way I would even email
compliments about the progress she was
making and she did not know what to do
with that it was actually kind of funny
to watch the next is a secret highly
accountable professionals reveal even
though it costs them when I tell you
what it is you are going to immediately
least spot the problem even if it's a
secret you spelled before so face palm
warning do not tattle on yourself when
you make a mistake that no one noticed
don't point it out to everyone if you
got in trouble with your boss you don't
have to tell your co-workers about it
there is zero shame in messing up making
mistakes and learning and growing from
it but it doesn't mean you need to
broadcast it especially when the gias
and Vivians of the world are going to be
asking you what did he just say to you
to feed their drama llama for free
speaking of feeding your toxic
co-workers drama llama this next thing
is something you absolutely need to keep
secret from your co-workers because if
you don't the biggest stressors in your
life are going to become office gossip
your co-workers should know about as
much about your personal life as they
know about quantum mechanics unless
they're all physicists or something they
may be familiar with the term perhaps
they have a vague idea of what it is
even a basic understanding of it but you
should not be the corporate Kardashian
over sharing every detail of your life
trust me the last thing you want is for
Gia to know about the breakup that
you're going through or other stress so
that she can be talking to everyone
about it from the conversations that
we've had in the comments I know a lot
of you don't really know what the lines
are and sometimes we don't find those
boundaries between work and life until
they're breach there's a really simple
question that can help you get clarity
on if it's something you should share
before you say it do I want my
co-workers speculating about this if the
answer is no keep it on the down low huh
that rhymed especially when it comes to
personal health info whether it's
physical health emotional health
psychological health or spiritual health
this is a line I know a lot of you are
walking based on the questions that I
get during my weekly Instagram AMA
sessions sometimes we have ailments that
we need to be open about in order to
navigate especially if you need
accommodations or it's obvious like when
I broke my foot falling down on the
sidewalk as I was texting but does
everyone need to know about it and
specifically what happened in most cases
I think Health info is on a needs to
know basis for instance I had absolutely
no issue talking to my boss about how my
anxiety was impact me at work but I
never would have wanted for Vivian to
know about it not because I was
embarrassed or ashamed of my anxiety it
goes back to what I said about arming
your adversaries because Vivian was one
thousand percent the type of person who
would have tried to weaponize my anxiety
about me which speaks to her character
not mine but still would have resulted
in me having to deal with unnecessary
drama similarly you do not need to make
break room confessions to your
co-workers like I'm 25 000 in credit
card debt this is something similar to
what one of my clients accidentally
shared with her co-workers absolutely
oblivious to the implications she
figured most people had things like
credit card debt and student loans but
by the time it got to her boss she
realized spilling that particular secret
was a massive mistake when it comes to
cash most people become Goldilocks if
you're perceived as having too much
money people think you don't need things
like promotions or pay increases or
career advancing opportunities if you
have too little you're perceived as
risky or irresponsible spoiler alert
when it comes to money I don't think
that there's any amount that people
think is just right which is why whether
it's the price of your new shoes the
balance on your student loan or the
amount that you're saving up for a
luxurious holiday or to buy a new home
keep those numbers secret from your
co-workers this is particularly true
when you're looking for a new job I
think most people already know to keep
it a secret from their co-workers when
they're looking for a new job and go out
of their way to hide when they're
interviewing with another company but
what about promotions one mistake I see
professionals making every day is
telling everyone about their career
Ambitions this can cause so many
problems first your ambitious co-worker
is now going to see you as competition
and if they play dirty politics they can
sabotage your work undermine you in
meetings and they'll take every
opportunity they can to discredit you
unfortunately it can also trigger a lot
of casual gossip some that's very
harmful like talking about how power
hungry you are what you're willing to do
to get promoted and if you get passed
over for that promotion your toxic
co-worker is going to Relish in your
misery because they love a downfall you
should be unapologetically ambitious at
work but not everyone needs to know
about it communicate your career goals
and your career Ambitions with the
people that are going to be instrumental
in advancing your career everyone else
can mind their own business similarly
when you're being given opportunities
and especially when career advancing
opportunities are being created just for
you or you're creating opportunities for
yourself keep these quiet to your
competitive co-workers I have heard way
too many stories about dirty politics
being deployed to snatch opportunities
away from The Talented professionals who
deserve them that said no matter how
well you protect these 10 Secrets
sometimes they're gonna get out which is
why if you're not engaging in office
politics keeping all of these secrets is
not going to matter the good news is
Corporate politics don't need to be
dirty and they don't need to be
complicated you just need to know the
five easy rules to win office politics
that I'm going to tell you about right
here
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