The secret to self control | Jonathan Bricker | TEDxRainier

Summary

In this inspiring talk, the speaker shares personal stories of their parents to underscore the importance of health and science. They introduce 'willingness' as a key to self-control, a concept from Acceptance and Commitment Therapy, which helps manage cravings without avoidance. The speaker's research shows that embracing cravings, rather than resisting them, significantly increases the success rate of quitting smoking. The talk encourages a compassionate approach to self-control, suggesting that giving up the struggle with cravings can lead to more effective behavior change.

Takeaways

• 🏃‍♀️ The speaker's mother started exercising later in life and achieved impressive milestones, such as running marathons and trekking to Everest's base camp.
• 📚 The speaker's father was instrumental in instilling a love for science and education, including teaching calculus in high school.
• 💪 The value of health and the importance of science were significant lessons imparted by the speaker's parents, guiding their life choices.
• 🌍 The speaker highlights the global epidemic of unhealthy living, with half a billion people being obese and a billion using tobacco.
• 🚭 Tobacco and obesity are identified as major preventable causes of premature death, emphasizing the need for change.
• 🧩 The speaker compares solving health epidemics to solving a jigsaw puzzle, with various factors contributing to unhealthy behaviors.
• 🔑 The concept of 'willingness' is introduced as a key to self-control and potentially reversing unhealthy epidemics.
• 💭 Willingness involves allowing cravings to exist without acting on them, contrasting with traditional willpower approaches.
• 📚 The speaker shares personal skepticism turned to belief after attending a workshop on willingness at the University of Washington.
• 🔬 Clinical trials and interventions are being conducted to test the effectiveness of teaching willingness for quitting smoking.
• 📈 Data from six clinical trials show that the willingness approach doubled the quit rate compared to the avoidance approach.
• 🤔 The speaker uses the story of 'Jane' to illustrate the practical application of willingness in counseling for quitting smoking.
• 💡 The secret to self-control, according to the speaker, is to give up control, allowing cravings to be without engaging in them.
• 🍪 The speaker encourages the audience to be aware of their cravings during lunch and to approach them with willingness and kindness.

Q & A

What significant change did the speaker's mother undertake when the speaker was born?

The speaker's mother, who was 42 years old when the speaker was born, started exercising for the first time in her life.

What athletic achievements did the speaker's mother accomplish over time?

The speaker's mother progressed from running around the block to completing 5K and 10K races, running a marathon, doing a triathlon, and trekking to the base camp of Mt. Everest by the age of 57.

What role did the speaker's father play in their life, particularly in relation to education?

The speaker's father took them to science classes as a child and also served as their calculus teacher in high school.

What valuable lessons did the speaker learn from their parents?

The speaker learned the value of health from their mother and the value of science from their father.

What is described as the epidemic we are all facing according to the speaker?

The speaker refers to the epidemic of unhealthy living, with a half billion people worldwide being obese.

Why are tobacco and obesity considered two of the most preventable causes of premature death?

Tobacco and obesity are considered preventable because they are lifestyle choices that can be controlled, yet they still contribute to a significant number of premature deaths.

What is the new science of self-control mentioned by the speaker?

The new science of self-control mentioned by the speaker is called 'willingness,' which involves allowing cravings to come and go without acting on them.

What does 'willingness' in the context of self-control entail?

'Willingness' in this context means dropping the struggle with cravings, opening up to them, letting them be there, and making peace with them instead of using willpower to resist them.

How did the speaker's initial exposure to the concept of 'willingness' occur?

The speaker's initial exposure to 'willingness' was through a book recommended by a friend, which they initially dismissed, but later embraced after attending a workshop at the University of Washington.

What is Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT), as mentioned in the script?

Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT) is a broad approach to behavior change that includes willingness as part of its methodology. It is used to help people with various issues, including anxiety disorders and addictions.

What is the main goal of the speaker's research lab at the Fred Hutchinson Cancer Research Center?

The main goal of the speaker's research lab is to conduct randomized clinical trials to determine if teaching people to be willing to have their cravings can effectively help them quit smoking.

What is the effectiveness of the 'willingness' approach compared to the 'avoidance' approach in clinical trials mentioned in the script?

According to the pooled results from six clinical trials, twice as many people quit smoking when assigned to the 'willingness' approach compared to the 'avoidance' approach.

What exercise did the speaker suggest to Jane to create space between her thoughts and actions?

The speaker suggested an exercise called 'I am having the thought,' where Jane would acknowledge her thoughts about needing a cigarette by saying, 'I'm having the thought that I'm feeling a lot of stress right now, I really need a cigarette.'

How did the speaker address Jane's feelings of shame associated with smoking?

The speaker suggested honoring the feeling of shame as part of the human experience and offering words of caring and kindness to oneself, as one would to a close friend feeling the same shame.

What is the secret to self-control according to the speaker's final remarks?

The secret to self-control, as per the speaker, is to give up control and allow cravings to be present without acting on them, thus avoiding the tug-of-war with the 'craving monster.'