COMO ENRIQUECER EM CASAL? Casais inteligentes enriquecem juntos - Gustavo Cerbasi

Cortes
16 Sept 202207:00

Summary

TLDRThe speaker discusses the importance of financial transparency and mutual understanding in relationships, emphasizing how lack of communication about finances can lead to stress and ultimately harm marriages. They highlight the need for couples to align their individual and shared goals, simplify their lifestyles, and avoid the trap of materialism and social media pressure. The speaker advocates for a balanced approach where personal desires and joint plans coexist, urging couples to foster open conversations about their financial realities to build a resilient and fulfilling partnership.

Takeaways

  • 💡 The book 'E Agora é Gustavo' discusses the importance of couples working together and understanding each other to enrich their relationship.
  • 💰 Many marriages end not due to lack of money, but due to lack of communication and clarity about financial decisions.
  • 🏠 In Brazil, about 50% of the providers in families are women, and they often have to make sacrifices to maintain the family's lifestyle.
  • 🔄 The speaker emphasizes the need for couples to simplify their lifestyle to ensure their dreams and goals can be achieved without financial stress.
  • 💔 The lack of balance in financial planning can lead to anxiety, loss of sleep, and decreased productivity, potentially damaging the relationship.
  • 👫 Couples need to communicate and align their personal and shared goals to avoid conflicts and ensure a harmonious relationship.
  • 👨‍👩‍👧‍👦 The speaker mentions the importance of planning for the future, including having children, retirement, and health insurance, but also not forgetting about personal desires like vacations and hobbies.
  • 💼 The speaker warns against the trap of focusing too much on work and financial stability at the expense of personal happiness and relationship quality.
  • 🏡 The script discusses the financial burden of homeownership, including mortgages and home improvements, and how it can affect a couple's financial stability and happiness.
  • 🌐 The influence of social media and the desire to keep up with others can lead to unrealistic expectations and financial stress, which can be detrimental to personal well-being and relationships.

Q & A

  • What is the main lesson from Gustavo's book about couples?

    -The main lesson is that for a couple to prosper, they must work together and have a deep understanding of each other, emphasizing the importance of self-awareness and communication.

  • Why do many marriages end due to financial issues according to Gustavo?

    -Many marriages end not because of a lack of money, but due to a lack of clarity and understanding about financial priorities and responsibilities within the relationship.

  • What is the role of the main provider in a Brazilian family, and how does it affect the relationship dynamics?

    -In Brazil, the main provider, often the woman, has to make sacrifices and work extra hours to cover expenses, which can lead to stress, anxiety, and a decrease in productivity, affecting the relationship.

  • How does Gustavo suggest couples should approach their financial planning?

    -Gustavo suggests simplifying their lifestyle to ensure that their dreams, both individual and as a couple, can be achieved without unnecessary financial strain.

  • What is the impact of not addressing financial issues in a relationship?

    -Not addressing financial issues can lead to a cascade of problems, including loss of sleep, anxiety, decreased productivity, and ultimately, the breakdown of the relationship.

  • Why does Gustavo emphasize the importance of having a simpler lifestyle?

    -Gustavo emphasizes a simpler lifestyle to ensure that the couple's financial goals are met without unnecessary stress and to maintain a balance between personal desires and shared dreams.

  • What is the significance of the phrase '1 + 1 = 3' in the context of the script?

    -The phrase '1 + 1 = 3' signifies the concept that in a relationship, the couple becomes a unit with shared goals and desires, which need to be considered when making plans and decisions.

  • How does Gustavo view the role of social media in shaping people's perceptions of success and happiness?

    -Gustavo believes that social media can create unrealistic expectations and lead to a focus on material possessions, which can be detrimental to one's authenticity and happiness.

  • What advice does Gustavo give regarding the balance between personal desires and shared goals in a relationship?

    -Gustavo advises couples to understand and respect each other's individual desires while also constructing shared goals and plans that consider the needs and dreams of both partners.

  • How does Gustavo describe the consequences of prioritizing personal desires over the needs of the relationship?

    -When personal desires are prioritized over the relationship, it can lead to a disconnect, with partners focusing solely on their own goals and neglecting the shared dreams and needs of the couple.

  • What is Gustavo's perspective on the importance of financial planning in maintaining a healthy relationship?

    -Gustavo views financial planning as crucial for maintaining a healthy relationship, as it helps to prevent conflicts, ensures a stable future, and allows the couple to enjoy their lives without unnecessary stress.

Outlines

00:00

💰 Financial Struggles in Marriages

The first paragraph discusses the financial challenges that couples face, emphasizing the importance of open communication and mutual understanding in managing household finances. It highlights how financial disagreements can lead to the breakdown of relationships, suggesting that many marriages end not due to lack of love but due to financial mismanagement. The speaker also touches on the societal expectation that women are often the ones managing the family's finances, which can lead to stress and anxiety if not handled properly. The paragraph concludes by urging couples to simplify their lifestyle to ensure that their dreams and aspirations can be achieved without financial strain.

05:01

🏡 The Illusion of Social Media

The second paragraph delves into the impact of social media on people's perception of wealth and success. It critiques the tendency for individuals to flaunt their possessions and lifestyle, which can create a false sense of reality and lead to envy and dissatisfaction. The speaker warns against the dangers of comparing oneself to others on social media and encourages a more authentic approach to life. They advocate for a balanced lifestyle that includes both luxuries and simplicity, rather than focusing solely on material possessions. The paragraph concludes by emphasizing the importance of living a genuine life that reflects one's true values and priorities, rather than an artificial image curated for social media.

Mindmap

Keywords

💡Couples

Couples are the central focus of the video's discussion, emphasizing the dynamics and challenges within relationships. The script mentions how couples need to work together and understand each other deeply, which is crucial for a successful relationship. For example, the transcript discusses the importance of couples having open conversations and shared goals to prevent issues like financial strain or lack of communication.

💡Financial Strain

Financial strain is a significant concept in the script, illustrating how it can lead to the breakdown of relationships. The speaker mentions that many marriages end not due to a lack of love but because of financial disagreements, such as differing views on spending and saving. This concept is tied to the broader theme of the video, which is about maintaining balance in life and relationships.

💡Self-knowledge

Self-knowledge is highlighted as a key to understanding one's partner and oneself within a relationship. It involves recognizing personal needs, desires, and boundaries, which is essential for mutual respect and harmony. The script suggests that couples who are self-aware can better navigate their relationship dynamics and make decisions that benefit both partners.

💡Lifestyle Simplification

Lifestyle simplification is presented as a solution to various problems faced by couples, such as financial stress and the pursuit of unrealistic goals. The speaker advocates for a simpler lifestyle to ensure that the couple's dreams can be achieved without unnecessary complications. This concept is exemplified in the script through the idea of reducing expenses to focus on what truly matters.

💡Authenticity

Authenticity is the concept of being true to oneself and one's values, which is threatened when individuals become overly consumed by societal pressures or materialistic goals. The script warns against losing authenticity by becoming a 'bill payer' rather than pursuing personal passions and interests, which can lead to unhappiness and a loss of identity.

💡Social Media

Social media is discussed in the context of its influence on individuals' perceptions of success and happiness. The speaker criticizes the tendency to compare oneself to others on social media, which can lead to unrealistic expectations and dissatisfaction. The script uses social media as an example of how external appearances can be deceiving and not reflective of true well-being.

💡Financial Independence

Financial independence is portrayed as a desirable state that allows individuals to make choices free from economic constraints. The speaker shares personal experiences of financial independence, emphasizing the importance of living within one's means and not being swayed by materialistic displays on social media.

💡Life Goals

Life goals are mentioned as an essential part of planning for the future, both individually and as a couple. The script discusses the need for couples to align their personal goals with their shared aspirations to create a harmonious and fulfilling life together. This includes considering factors like career, family, and personal interests.

💡Work-Life Balance

Work-life balance is a recurring theme in the script, with the speaker discussing the importance of not letting work dominate one's life to the detriment of personal relationships and well-being. The transcript mentions the negative effects of overworking, such as anxiety and decreased productivity, and the need for couples to prioritize quality time together.

💡Societal Expectations

Societal expectations are depicted as a source of pressure that can distort individuals' perceptions of what they should have or achieve in life. The script criticizes the tendency to conform to societal norms, such as owning a home or a car, which may not align with one's personal values or financial capabilities.

💡Simplicity

Simplicity is presented as a virtue and a way of life that can lead to greater happiness and fulfillment. The speaker argues for embracing simplicity to reduce unnecessary stress and focus on what truly brings joy and meaning to life. The script uses the concept of simplicity to contrast the emptiness of materialistic pursuits with the richness of a life well-lived.

Highlights

The book 'E Agora é Gustavo em relação aos Casais' is not the author's bestseller, but it is highly relevant to current discussions about couples.

The main lesson of the book is that couples need to work together to enrich their relationship, emphasizing the importance of self-awareness and understanding each other.

Many marriages end not due to lack of money, but due to lack of clear communication about financial decisions and expectations.

In Brazil, about 50% of families are supported by women, which can lead to stress and sacrifices if they are the primary providers.

Financial stress can lead to anxiety, decreased productivity at work, and a strain on the relationship.

The speaker suggests that couples should simplify their lifestyle to ensure that their dreams and goals as a couple can be achieved.

Couples often forget about their personal desires and needs in the pursuit of financial stability and family responsibilities.

The speaker warns against the dangers of social media, where people often compare themselves to others and feel the need to keep up appearances.

It's important to focus on what truly matters to you, rather than what society or others expect you to have or do.

The speaker emphasizes the need for a balanced approach to life, where personal desires and couple goals are considered equally.

Couples should create parallel plans that consider both individual and shared goals to avoid conflicts and misunderstandings.

The speaker discusses the importance of having a lower cost of living to achieve short and medium-term dreams, suggesting that Brazilians often take too big steps financially.

The speaker shares personal experiences of celebrating simple moments with family, highlighting the value of enjoying life's simple pleasures.

The speaker advises against ostentatious displays of wealth, suggesting that they often mask deeper issues or imbalances.

The speaker encourages a more authentic lifestyle, where people are not just focused on financial independence but also on enjoying life and relationships.

The speaker warns against the trap of always planning for the future at the expense of enjoying the present, suggesting a more balanced approach.

The speaker emphasizes the importance of not losing one's authenticity in the pursuit of financial stability and societal expectations.

The speaker concludes by encouraging a lifestyle that balances personal desires, couple goals, and financial responsibility, promoting a more fulfilling and sustainable way of living.

Transcripts

play00:00

e agora é Gustavo em relação aos casais

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que é um livro que você não é o seu

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livro mais vendido

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é é assim isso é uma mãe daqui a gente

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vê que hoje está acontecendo muito a

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gente vê que as pessoas estão né os

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casais estão pensando muito nisso como

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que um casal pode Henrique esse junto de

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todo o livro nasceu da lição principal

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que eu trabalho longo de todo o livro

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não é o seu casal que enriquecer tem que

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fazer isso junto né E que é inteligente

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autoconhecimento tem conhecer muito bem

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a pessoa que eu amo ah você falou que

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muitos casamentos acabam por falta de

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dinheiro não é por falta de conversa o

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dinheiro acaba por falta de

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esclarecimento porque talvez alguém

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queria oferecer um conforto para família

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mas não Combinou direito e o resto da

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família queria continuar desfrutando de

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passeios não quer deixar de dar presente

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uma festa que vai foi chamado para ser

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padrinho de casamento aqui da mão

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presente então as coisas vão se

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sobrepondo e vão sufocando não tem

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conversa aquele que se propôs a seu

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provedor o a provedora da família fica

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no Brasil é mais cinquenta por cento são

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mulheres né então que se propôs a prover

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a família vai ter que correr atrás vai

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ter que sacrificar vai ter que fazer

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hora extra vai ter imprevistos também

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nós no Brasil exato os preços aumentam

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as leis mudam os governos mudam se tem

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previsto mas eu tenho que cobrir

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problemas que nós estamos falando você

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não tem um reservas eu me divido eu

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começo a ter que vender coisas que era

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importante para mim essa pessoa começa a

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Perder sono mas fica ansiosa começa a

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não ter mais produtividade no trabalho

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ela ainda num Efeito Dominó uma coisa

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derrubando a outra se o casamento estava

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bem pessoal daqui um tempo Tava broxando

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fim de mais nada não tem vida eu não tô

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feliz só problema não comer trabalhar

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dormir boa noite você quer que eu

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compareci não tem o relacionamento vai

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esfriar vai acabar porque tá tem uns o

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corpo agora se o casal percebe que pera

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aí vamos parar no site momento aí casou

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porque de caso ou por quê a abalada

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viajar se presentear se cuidar um do

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outro Tava legal vamos preservar para

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que isso nunca acabe para mim só que é

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pagar a dívida se eu quero gastar com a

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devida meu custo de vida tem que ser

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melhor eu de novo chamando pra vida mas

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sim né tô sempre simplifique o estilo de

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vida para garantir que os meus sonhos os

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seus sonhos e os sonhos de casal

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aconteçam eu vou ter três pessoas

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felizes no casal né eu tu e nós sim o

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que acontece na maioria dos casais ecc

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ou casal só cuida do nosso nós vamos ter

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aposentadoria nós vamos ter um filho nós

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temos um seguro nós temos um plano de

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saúde mas o eu ficou esquecido um

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gostava de praia eu tô gostar de

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montanha ou gostar de frio de calor e

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não se fala mais à vontade de doar Então

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tem muito casamento que vai acabar lá na

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frente parecia aquela família perfeita

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né os planos lá dos Simpsons é a família

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tudo certinho de repente Nossa eles

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separaram porque uma hora ela fica por

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eu não tô feliz exato agora Feliz lá com

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a noite tava na moral essa vida de 25

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anos a graça esse é um problema os

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problemas extremo oposto em que só se

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cuida do eu eu ganho dinheiro você ganha

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dinheiro eu tenho meu pé de mesa tempo é

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de manhã tem meu rappi algum amigo você

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tem que seus amigos também né então eu

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eu pode gordinho né quando tento incluir

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o nosso futuro nós vamos ter filho não

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agora minha carreira não permite Então

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agora eu não posso agora eu tô com

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projeto ano que vem esse casal promete

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esse relacionamento acabar antes eles

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perceberam que não casaram ainda eles

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são apenas uma sociedade é um como é que

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você equaciona isso 1 + 1 = 3i

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quem quer montar um plano Quais são suas

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vontades quais são minhas vontades e

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quais são as vontades típicas de casal

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que vai perceber que algum momento vai

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ter necessidades e vai ter que construir

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planos em paralelo se eu tenho vários

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planos acontecendo no tempo tocou planta

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vários planos naturalmente ou perceber

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que eu tenho que ter um custo de vida

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menor para realizar o sonho de curto

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Médio prazo meu seu e nosso

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insisto nesse ponto da vida mais simples

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porque eu acho que o brasileiro não tá

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errado em pensar em ter o seu cantinho

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próprio não tá errado em pensar em

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receber amigos em casa não tá errado em

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pensar dar conforto para família ele tá

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errado no tamanho do Passo exatamente

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sumir trinta por cento da sua renda e

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financiamento de imóvel depois mais

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cinco dez porcento no parcelamento da

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decoração de imóvel que você fez Depois

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você percebe que nossa mas é importante

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tem um seguro é importante alguma sei lá

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a casa tá vazia por uma TV você vai ter

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um efeito Cascata desestabilizam a

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totalmente impressionante mental né você

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falando com aquela pessoa começa a ter

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uma ansiedade uma problema sério né Ele

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tava olhando o dinheiro para cuidar da

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saúde não tem dinheiro para praticar o

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esporte não tem dinheiro para fazer as

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coisas que gosta para doar para as

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causas que acredita que a pessoa perder

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a autenticidade ela passou a ser um

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pagador de contas ficou igual a todo

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mundo né que funcionava nos anos 50 no

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Estados Unidos né hoje a gente tem

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referência redes sociais puxa eu quero

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ser igual as pessoas que admiram você

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quer ser igual as pessoas que você

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admira você quer ser gostoso ele é

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preciso que a intensidade meu consumo É

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como você tem intensidade gastando mais

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com coisa que são importantes para você

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que não necessariamente importante para

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mim mas diminuindo o peso daquilo que

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Teoricamente todo mundo tem que ter Não

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tomando cuidado com isso eu gostava

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porque assim a gente vê uma

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infelizmente a rede social atrás dois

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lados muito bom bons a pessoa foca

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naquilo que positivo e um ruim André

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assim a frustração a gente vê Às vezes

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as pessoas em Hi aqui carro que cai

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milionário com aquele a gente escuta

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muito isso aí eu vou comprar e tal

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aquela casa só que às vezes a pessoa não

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imagina o que a outra pessoa tá passando

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às vezes não é o Ases alugado às vezes

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ela tem dividados isso até famosa gente

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sabe muito famoso aqui deu a primeira

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parcela de carro depois não deu mais não

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pagou Isso é um problema grande né Às

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vezes eu diria quase totalidade das

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vezes o que as pessoas ostentam demais

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tá associado algum desequilíbrio tem

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alguma coisa errada ali por trás é uma

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vida muito artificial é eu mostro muito

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no estilo de vida mas assim foi um

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cuidado que eu passei a tomar quando as

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pessoas começaram a falar e pelo do

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carro fala para o cara vida não é seu

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número não a vida não é só fazer conta

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né só pensar no futuro não se você tá

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vendo só uma janelinha meu trabalho

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deixa eu mostrar um pouco mais o todo

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você entender como que é meu lazer ontem

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eu tava celebrando no meu Instagram

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Talvez o um dos dias mais ricos que eu

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tive meu ano meus filhos tava estudando

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para prova não tinha compromisso nenhum

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só eu e minha família preparando um

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churrasquinho para nós dos outros quatro

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curtindo um dia vendo uma tv em casa

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montando quebra-cabeça um dia vazio

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tempo em silêncio para gente é pra é

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super lindo né então

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por que que eu mostro me avisa redes

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sociais as pessoas entenderem que não é

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porque eu tenho independência financeira

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de buscar Ostentando um relógio de 50

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mil reais o tempo todo andando no carro

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conversível né luxo charuto se eu gostar

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de charuto eu quero gastar muito puxar

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Outro ponto sim mas vou ter que

play06:53

simplificar em outras coisas não vou ter

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que ter uma vida mais simples para

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comportar esse esporte entre aspas caro

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aqui é meu estilo

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