‘Targeted because you are Indian’: How two Indian-Americans are healing from racial trauma

Summary

The video script narrates a personal journey of racial identity and healing. It features individuals confronting racism and embracing their cultural heritage, particularly the Indian-American experience. From childhood struggles with cultural acceptance to adult realizations of the importance of self-identity, the script highlights the power of sharing personal stories to challenge perceptions and foster racial healing. It underscores the resilience and hope in overcoming racism through community engagement and cultural pride.

Takeaways

• 🌟 The video discusses the impact of racism on personal life, highlighting a moment when the speaker was told they were targeted because of their Indian heritage.
• 🏙️ The speaker embarks on a journey to challenge racial perceptions by traveling and engaging in one-on-one conversations to promote racial healing.
• 🌐 The conversation takes place in Washington, DC, with Kevin Fong, the founder of The Kakule Institute, which focuses on cultivating communities of belonging.
• 👶 The speaker's name, Omash, has cultural significance, and they discuss the tradition of passing down the father's name in Tamilan culture.
• 📚 The speaker's experience with their name at school led to a desire to assimilate by considering a more common name to avoid mispronunciation and confusion.
• 🌈 Growing up in a predominantly non-Indian community, the speaker faced challenges in embracing their culture due to a lack of understanding and acceptance from peers.
• 💼 The speaker recounts a personal experience of job loss due to racial bias, being told that a 'brown person' was not wanted to represent the company.
• 🍛 The speaker's mother's traditional Indian cooking was a source of pride but also led to bullying at school, causing the speaker to hide their cultural identity.
• 🏡 A traumatic event, the burglary and desecration of the family's home temple, was a turning point for the speaker, leading to a re-embrace of their Indian heritage.
• 📘 The speaker uses their platform to educate and promote acceptance, sharing personal experiences with microaggressions to foster understanding and change.
• 🌱 The video concludes with a call to action for viewers to share their stories and contribute to the collective effort of ending racism, one story at a time.

Q & A

What is the primary mission of the Kakule Institute founded by Kevin Fong?

The primary mission of the Kakule Institute is to cultivate communities of belonging and engage in conversations to challenge perceptions of who we are and what we can do to bring racial healing to our communities.

What is the significance of the name 'Omash' in the script?

Omash is a Sanskrit word that means 'Heaven'. It is the first name of the person being interviewed, which was passed down as a last name in Tamil culture.

Why did the interviewee consider changing their name during middle school?

The interviewee considered changing their name to avoid the difficulty of having their name mispronounced by substitute teachers and to make it easier for people to understand.

What was the cultural challenge the interviewee faced growing up in the suburbs of Georgia?

The interviewee faced the challenge of being one of the few brown kids in their community, and the lack of acceptance and understanding of their Indian culture by their peers.

What incident led to the interviewee losing their job post-911?

The interviewee lost their job because they were told that the company did not want a brown person representing them, highlighting a direct experience of racism.

How did the interviewee's schoolmates react to the traditional Indian food they brought for lunch?

The schoolmates did not understand or appreciate the traditional Indian food, making the interviewee throw out their lunch because it was considered 'stinky' or unappealing.

What was the turning point for the interviewee in 2017 that changed their perspective on their cultural identity?

The turning point was when their house was burglarized and the intruders disrespected their home's temple, leading the interviewee to realize the importance of embracing their Indian identity.

How does the interviewee use their platform to combat racism and promote acceptance?

The interviewee uses their platform to encourage people to be more accepting of others' opinions, to educate about microaggressions, and to console and help people recover from racial experiences.

What is the role of curry in the interviewee's narrative and how has it been used to bridge gaps between people?

Curry is used metaphorically as a foundation for the interviewee's blog, where they write about different narratives and aim to build bridges by sharing their own experiences and encouraging others to make the recipe their own way.

What is the interviewee's hope for the future in terms of racial healing?

The interviewee holds hope that racism can be ended within their lifetime and is committed to using their platform and experiences to educate and promote acceptance and understanding.

What advice does the interviewee have for others who might be experiencing racial challenges?

The interviewee advises others to share their stories, embrace their cultural identity, and use their experiences to educate and help others understand the importance of acceptance and racial healing.

Outlines

00:00

🌏 Encountering Racism and Cultural Identity

The first paragraph introduces the theme of racism and cultural identity through a personal narrative. The speaker, who is of Indian descent, recounts a life-changing moment when they were explicitly told they were targeted due to their race. This experience led them on a journey to facilitate conversations about race and cultural perceptions. The speaker's name, Omash, is highlighted as an example of cultural heritage and the struggles of maintaining a unique identity in a society that often fails to recognize or respect it. The paragraph also touches on the speaker's upbringing in India and the challenges faced in the United States, including instances of racism and the impact on their self-identity and career.

05:00

🍛 The Bridge of Curry: Overcoming Prejudice Through Food

In the second paragraph, the narrative shifts to the role of food, specifically curry, as a cultural bridge. The speaker discusses the misconceptions and stereotypes associated with curry and how it has been used to connect people from different backgrounds. They share an anecdote about a cookbook review that criticized the lack of curry recipes, leading to a personal policy of not providing curry recipes unless the reader is willing to make it their own way. This reflects the broader theme of embracing individuality and authenticity in cultural expression. The speaker also recounts a painful memory of being ridiculed for bringing traditional Indian food to school, which led to a difficult conversation with their mother about the desire to fit in by abandoning their cultural food practices.

10:02

🏡 The Assault on Identity and the Resolve to End Racism

The third paragraph delves into a traumatic event where the speaker's home was burglarized and their religious shrine was desecrated, an act that the police attributed to their Indian identity. This incident served as a turning point, prompting the speaker to stop hiding their cultural identity. They reflect on the futility of trying to assimilate by suppressing their heritage and express a renewed commitment to ending racism. The speaker shares their current efforts to use their platform to promote acceptance and educate others about the harmful effects of microaggressions. The paragraph concludes with a call to action for everyone to share their stories as a step towards racial healing.

Keywords

💡Racism

Racism is the belief in the inherent superiority of one race over another, which often results in discrimination and prejudice towards people based on their race or ethnicity. In the video's theme, racism is a central issue as the speakers share personal experiences of being targeted and discriminated against because of their Indian heritage. An example from the script is when one person was told they lost their job because the company 'didn't want a brown person representing the company.'

💡Cultural Identity

Cultural identity refers to an individual's sense of self in relation to their cultural background, including their traditions, language, and values. The video explores the struggle of maintaining and expressing one's cultural identity in the face of racism and the desire to fit in. The script illustrates this with the story of a person who initially shunned their Indian name and later regretted giving up their cultural identity for the sake of acceptance.

💡Microaggressions

Microaggressions are subtle, often unintentional, discriminatory comments or actions that communicate hostile or derogatory messages to a targeted individual or group. In the context of the video, microaggressions are part of the everyday experiences of the speakers, such as being mispronounced names or having their food preferences ridiculed. The script mentions instances where the speaker's Indian food was made fun of at school, causing them to hide their cultural practices.

💡Representation

Representation in this context refers to the portrayal or inclusion of members of a particular group in various aspects of society, such as the media, workplace, or politics. The video discusses the negative experience of being told one is not suitable to represent a company due to their race, highlighting the lack of representation and the biases that exist in various sectors of society.

💡Acceptance

Acceptance in the video's narrative pertains to the desire to be recognized and valued by others despite one's cultural or racial background. It is a recurring theme as the speakers reflect on the sacrifices they made in an attempt to gain acceptance from their peers, such as changing their eating habits or considering adopting a different name. The script describes the emotional turmoil of choosing between one's identity and the need to fit in.

💡Healing

Healing, in the context of the video, is the process of recovery or becoming whole after experiencing emotional or psychological harm. The video emphasizes the importance of racial healing, which involves addressing and overcoming the effects of racism to foster understanding and unity. The script mentions 'racial healing circles,' which are gatherings aimed at facilitating this process of recovery and building community.

💡Perceptions

Perceptions are the ways in which individuals interpret and understand the world around them, often influenced by societal norms and personal experiences. The video challenges viewers to rethink their perceptions of race and culture, encouraging a more inclusive and empathetic viewpoint. The script discusses the importance of engaging in conversations to better understand different perspectives and to challenge stereotypes.

💡Discrimination

Discrimination is the unjust or prejudicial treatment of different categories of people, especially based on their race, age, or sex. The video's content revolves around personal accounts of discrimination faced by individuals due to their Indian heritage. An example from the script is the explicit statement made by an employer about not wanting a 'brown person' to represent the company.

💡Narrative

In the video, a narrative refers to the story or account of events as they are presented or understood by an individual or group. The speakers challenge false or disrespectful narratives about their culture, such as stereotypes associated with Indian food, and share their own narratives to foster a more accurate and respectful understanding. The script includes a discussion about how the speaker uses their platform to educate others and share their personal experiences.

💡Community

Community in this context refers to a group of people who share common values, interests, or goals. The video emphasizes the importance of building and fostering a sense of community that is inclusive and supportive, particularly in the fight against racism. The script mentions the idea of weaving together individual stories to create a collective narrative that promotes belonging and acceptance.

💡Education

Education in the video is portrayed as a tool for combating racism and promoting understanding. It involves sharing knowledge and experiences to challenge misconceptions and stereotypes. The script highlights the speaker's role in educating others about the impact of microaggressions and the importance of respecting cultural differences.

Highlights

The moment of realizing racism's impact on personal life when being told directly by the police that one was targeted for being Indian.

The struggle with job loss due to racial bias, with a company not wanting a 'brown person' to represent them.

Initiating one-on-one conversations across the country to challenge perceptions and promote racial healing.

The importance of understanding and weaving individual stories together for a collective understanding in communities.

Cultural identity and the significance of names in reflecting heritage and personal history.

The internal conflict of wanting to assimilate by changing one's name to fit in with the majority.

Growing up as an Indian immigrant in a predominantly non-Indian community and the cultural challenges faced.

The disillusionment with the idea of equality and acceptance in the United States, especially post-9/11.

The painful memory of having traditional Indian food rejected at school due to cultural misunderstanding.

The difficult decision to hide one's cultural identity in an attempt to fit in and be accepted.

The transformative experience of a home invasion targeting an Indian family, leading to a reevaluation of one's cultural identity.

The role of food as a cultural bridge and the narrative around curry as a means of connection and understanding.

The personal journey of reclaiming and embracing one's Indian heritage after years of suppression.

The commitment to using personal platforms to promote acceptance and educate others about racial biases.

The healing process of sharing personal stories and experiences as a means to combat racism.

The collective effort required to end racism, emphasizing the importance of individual stories and actions.

The power of education and support in helping individuals recover from experiences of racism and discrimination.

Transcripts

what was the moment that changed you the

police tell you to your face you were

targeted because you were Indian the

moment that racism changed your life I

remember losing my job and was told we

don't want a brown person representing

the company we're traveling the country

to host one-on-one conversations that

challenge perceptions of who we are and

what we can do to bring racial healing

to our communities first stop Washington

DC

[Music]

we're in the nation's capital for a

uniquely aapi perspective on race with

Kevin Fong founder of The kakule

Institute a space that works on

cultivating communities of

belonging we're here today to engage in

conversation with folks to find out who

they are who's they are and what their

hopes and dreams are to create a better

future for us all in that way we can

take their story and weave it together

with another person's story and another

person's story and no two stories wo

together quite like these

two because my first name it means

Heaven it's a Sanskrit word omash

Shankar is actually my dad's first name

in uh tamilan culture you move your

dad's first name to become your last

name and it moves on like that we belong

to a very small group of people

from um from the west coast of India

it's a tiny village and anyone with the

last name of good bully is related did

you ever consider like I wish I didn't

have this name what does is what does

this look and feel like you are reading

my mind right now because in I think it

was in Middle School I considered going

by like violet or Vanessa or something

just so that people could get it cuz I

remember like substitute teachers

reading the Roll Call list and them

being like viha VI VHA like they didn't

know how to pronounce it they didn't

know what it meant and so there were

days when I just went by V and I hated

it I still hate it when people call me V

I'm like that's not my name tell me

about where you grew up I grew up in

India so I grew up around people of uh

that looked like me I grew up in the

suburbs of Georgia and I was one of the

very few brown kids in my community and

not just brown but Indian specifically

and my parents being very proud of their

culture very involved in their culture

they wanted me to become proud and

involved in my culture but it was really

difficult because people don't really

see and understand your culture I mean I

was growing up in the mid 2000s and you

know kids weren't as accepting back then

as they may be now when I came to the

states I really did feel like okay well

the world all should be all equal and we

should all have a place and we are all

working hard and we all have something

to give back to the society and to the

communities that we are part of and um

some of that didn't go so

well so uh there were instances where I

was reminded that I was an immigrant and

I was a brown person and I wasn't

welcome in a you know non Brown

workspace environment and when my

daughter was born um I had just n it was

she was born in the post 911 time frame

and I remember losing my job uh during

that time because and was told we don't

want a brown person representing the

company and it was a very you know they

said it very off-handed but it stuck

with

me so when we had our daughter I taught

about her place in this country that's

going to be hers and what it meant and

so slowly slowly just you know one

Pebble at a time working to ensure that

her future is one of acceptance for who

she is one of my Fondest Memories from

elementary school is my mom making me

traditional Indian food to take to

school for lunch I would love eating it

and I would love having that opportunity

to you know Savor my mom's cooking but

some of the kids they just didn't get it

and so they would make me throw out my

lunch because it was stinky or it didn't

look good or whatever they may have said

back then so it was really difficult

growing up as someone who wanted to be

proud of being Indian being brown but

just not being accepted by the people

around you that you know you want to be

friends with you want to you want to

connect with them but it's just it's

just there's a block you can't really do

that you talk about communication and

and you have this blog and you use Curry

as the foundation for your blog and um

and so and you write about this no that

um there are different narratives and

sometimes false narratives about Curry

or disrespectful narratives give me a

specific example where Curry was used to

build a bridge between two people

yourself perhaps and another person who

couldn't be more opposite than you that

might require some thinking but I want

to just say that every cookbook I have

written when a reviewer said does not

have a single recipe for curry terrible

book and so since then I've in uded this

note that if you're looking for a recipe

for curry please return this book to

your seller I say this often I'll give

you a recipe but you're going to make it

your way and that's what I love about

being in that space where I can give you

the tools and it's not um it's not a

secret you know Coke

formula you can make it your own so

helpful um that's what we do in the work

of of racial healing circles is that you

know it's this concept just give me the

formula give me the the recipe as were

and then we can uh you know find healing

in this community or this or that it's

like no you have to you can't follow

that you have to actually bring in the

heart and that's what you do is you

introduce the heart introduce that in a

different way I introduce them to the

components of them and let them build it

your mom takes great pride in her

cooking and you said that you you held

great pride in in taking it there but

then you ridiculed you were shunned for

bringing this food and how do I go home

and tell this to my mom and all of this

I it was hard it was really hard because

my like you'll taste my mom's food she

is an amazing cook she's one of the best

but to bring up to your mom hey I don't

want you to make dalb and chop for me

anymore this isn't this isn't working

and to tell her that you would prefer

peanut butter and jelly sandwiches to

whatever traditional food she's making

to you that was hard I remember having

this conversation with her I told her I

can't eat what you give me anymore and

she she was like why you know is it not

good do you not like it is it did did I

make something wrong or what what's

happening and I told her it was because

the kids at school they they would call

it Curry and I just didn't want to have

that associated with me and it was it

was difficult because you know this this

woman she's waking up at 5:00 a.m. 6

a.m. to sit and hand roll Roes for me

every morning every morning fresh Roes

and it now it's like I want that to have

someone love me so much as to make me

fresh jees every morning to take to

lunch you just don't get that anymore

and so it's unfortunate that I had to

give up so many years of you know that

love and care that she offered because I

wanted to fit in and obviously I look

back on it now and I'm like darn it why

did I do that why did I give up all of

that so the price of acceptance right

the price of acceptance you paid a high

one and um my question is

uh at the end of the day were you really

accepted was it worth the

price I don't think it was worth it I

genuinely don't because I look at who I

was then and I was I was hiding such a

big part of my identity and I was

unhappy with it I was unhappy with who I

was because I I was just Frank quite

frankly I was just trying to be another

white

girl you mentioned 2017 as a turning

point for you can you talk about that of

course

um sorry never apologize here just take

a breath 2017 was a hard year for us I

had just come back from spring break we

came home from the airport my mom and I

I remember opening the front door and

the smell of our house wasn't the same

usually our house smells like spices and

incense and you know the loving home

smell that you always recognize and and

it just didn't smell like that and I

walked through the door and I just

immediately knew something was wrong and

turns out that a couple of burglars had

broken into our house earlier that day

um they broke in through the back door

and they pretty much ransacked our home

what was the most shocking was the fact

that they attacked our temple in a lot

of Indian homes we have little shrines

for all of our gods and goddesses and

they completely ripped it apart all of

the the little statues we had were

scattered and they were on the floor

with no respect for their meaning

whatsoever and that was hard to see and

I remember going outside standing in our

yard and just screaming cuz I had no

idea what to do and you know you call

the police your neighbors hear you being

loud and aggressive and you don't they

don't know what's going on so they come

and check and the police tell you to

your face you were targeted because you

were Indian

and in that moment I was like what did I

do wrong was it did I did I put out some

joli that they didn't like is it the

garlands above our above our door what

like what did I do but it's not what we

did it really wasn't and that took so

long for me to accept I had kind of

shunned out any part of my Indian

personality or any part of my culture I

just I ignored it entirely and in that

moment I realized there was no point in

me hiding it because I was never going

to be white everyone was always going to

see me as Indian and see me as brown so

why am I hiding it you know I firmly

believe and hold hope that we can end

racism within our lifetime what are one

or two things that you could personally

commit to or that you're personally

doing now that helps to further that

vision of ending racism within our

lifetime I I use my platform whatever I

do um

to encourage people to be more accepting

of another person's opinion and I think

releasing ourselves from those

boundaries of expectations of ourselves

of some more than ourselves of someone

else the releasing yourself from that is

freeing but is

also it's such a community that you're

building because then you start seeing

each

other I think I'm in a position where I

can help to educate the population I've

had my fair share of microaggressions

against me and so I know now that I can

tell people hey that's not cool let's

not say that you know but I think my my

place is less of fighting and more of

consoling and helping people

[Music]

recover I'm so encouraged by what

everybody body shared here their stories

their strength their power and that they

will take their commitments forward

because we're going to do this one story

one action one person at a

time what can you bring in the two

ending races out and I do have a good

answer for that it's like I can educate

I can be there as a source of we know

comfort and helping people recover all

of that but that's not would enough you

know and I think that there is hard it's

a start yes changing the narrative

starts with sharing stories share your

story with

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