इसके बाद लड़की मना नही करेगी

Psychology Seekho
11 Jul 202405:13

Summary

TLDRDr. Neha Mehta, a sexual health counselor, discusses sexual shame in this insightful video. She addresses common issues such as body image concerns, fear of intimacy, and mismatched fantasies that can lead to sexual shame. Dr. Mehta emphasizes the importance of open communication, self-acceptance, and seeking professional help if needed. She encourages viewers to overcome shame by understanding its roots and maintaining a positive self-image, offering a supportive approach to sexual health.

Takeaways

  • 😌 Sexual Shame: The script discusses the issue of sexual shame, where individuals may feel uncomfortable or uninitiated in sexual activities due to various reasons.
  • 👥 Partner Rejection: It mentions that if a partner frequently rejects or postpones sexual advances, it could lead to feelings of inadequacy and sexual shame.
  • 👚 Body Image Concerns: The importance of body image is highlighted, with the script noting that insecurities about one's body can be a significant obstacle to sexual intimacy.
  • 💡 Openness and Confidence: The script emphasizes the need for openness and confidence in sexual relationships, suggesting that hiding in the dark or being secretive can hinder intimacy.
  • 👗 Nightwear Experimentation: It talks about how experimenting with nightwear can affect one's comfort level during sexual activities, with the suggestion that comfort is key.
  • 🔥 Fear of Intimacy: The script identifies fear as a common cause of sexual shame, particularly the fear of pain or discomfort during sexual penetration.
  • 🤝 Mismatched Fantasies: It points out that when partners have different sexual fantasies, it can lead to feelings of shame and avoidance of sexual activities.
  • 🚫 Negative Self-Talk: The impact of negative self-talk and societal messages on sexual self-esteem is discussed, which can contribute to sexual shame.
  • 🤰 Post-Pregnancy and Surgery: The script mentions that life events such as post-pregnancy or surgery can introduce sexual shame by affecting one's body image and confidence.
  • 🗣️ Communication Issues: It suggests that poor communication from a partner, such as making negative comments, can hinder sexual life and contribute to shame.
  • 📞 Seeking Professional Help: The script recommends seeking advice from a good sex counselor and therapy for those experiencing sexual shame, offering the option to book consultations.

Q & A

  • What is the main topic discussed in the video script?

    -The main topic discussed in the video script is sexual shame and how it can affect one's sexual life and relationship.

  • What does the speaker suggest could be a sign of sexual shame in a relationship?

    -The speaker suggests that if a partner frequently rejects sexual advances, seems uninterested, or is not open about their desires, it could be a sign of sexual shame.

  • What is the role of body image in the context of sexual shame?

    -Body image plays a significant role in sexual shame, as insecurities about one's body can lead to discomfort and avoidance of sexual activities.

  • Why might some people prefer to have sex with the lights off?

    -Some people might prefer to have sex with the lights off because they feel uncomfortable or insecure about their body when exposed to light.

  • What is the importance of openness and bravery in addressing sexual shame?

    -Openness and bravery are important in addressing sexual shame because they allow individuals to communicate their feelings and desires, which can help overcome shame and improve sexual experiences.

  • How can mismatched fantasies between partners contribute to sexual shame?

    -Mismatched fantasies between partners can lead to feelings of shame if one partner feels uncomfortable or embarrassed about their desires, leading to avoidance or reluctance in sexual activities.

  • What is the impact of fear of pain or discomfort during sexual activities on sexual shame?

    -The fear of pain or discomfort during sexual activities can contribute to sexual shame by causing individuals to avoid or delay sexual encounters, fearing negative experiences.

  • What advice does the speaker give for dealing with negative self-talk related to sexual shame?

    -The speaker advises seeking the help of a good sex counselor and possibly therapy to deal with negative self-talk and to improve one's sexual life.

  • How can societal and media pressures contribute to sexual shame?

    -Societal and media pressures can contribute to sexual shame by perpetuating unrealistic expectations and standards about sexual performance and body image, leading to feelings of inadequacy.

  • What are some life events that can trigger sexual shame according to the script?

    -Life events such as post-pregnancy, post-surgery, and other significant changes can trigger sexual shame by affecting one's body image and sexual confidence.

  • What is the speaker's recommendation for those experiencing sexual shame?

    -The speaker recommends seeking professional help, such as a sex counselor or therapist, to address and overcome sexual shame.

Outlines

00:00

🚫 Sexual Shame and Relationship Dynamics

The paragraph discusses the potential for sexual shame in relationships, where individuals may feel uninitiated or uncomfortable with sexual intimacy. It suggests that if a partner consistently rejects intimacy or appears uninterested, it could be a sign of sexual disinterest. The speaker, Dr. Neha Mehta, a sexual health counselor, encourages seeking advice and therapy to address these issues, and emphasizes the importance of body image and self-talk in sexual health.

Mindmap

Keywords

💡Sexual Shame

Sexual shame refers to feelings of embarrassment or discomfort related to one's sexual desires, behaviors, or body image. In the video's context, it is linked to the reluctance or avoidance of sexual intimacy due to fear of judgment or negative self-perception. The script mentions that if a person feels shame or discomfort about their body, such as breast size or body color, it can lead to sexual shame, affecting the willingness to engage in sexual activities.

💡Initiative

Initiative in the script pertains to the willingness or readiness to start or engage in sexual activity. It is highlighted as a potential issue when a partner frequently rejects or postpones sexual advances, indicating a lack of interest or readiness, which may contribute to feelings of inadequacy or sexual shame.

💡Sexual Aversion

Sexual aversion is a strong feeling of dislike or aversion towards sexual activity. The video discusses it as a possible outcome when there is a consistent pattern of rejection or avoidance of sex, both before and after marriage, and when a partner appears uninterested, leading to the development of a sexual aversion disorder.

💡Body Image Issues

Body image issues refer to the negative perceptions individuals have about their physical appearance. The script discusses how concerns about body parts, such as breast size or hair growth, can create obstacles in sexual intimacy by causing discomfort and a lack of confidence during sexual activities.

💡Openness

Openness in the context of the video script signifies the willingness to be vulnerable and express oneself without fear of judgment, particularly in intimate situations. It is emphasized as important for overcoming body image issues and sexual shame, as it allows for a more comfortable and honest sexual experience.

💡Night Dresses

Night dresses in the script symbolize the experimentation with one's appearance during intimate moments, aiming to feel more comfortable and confident. The mention of night dresses being experimented with suggests that individuals often try to find ways to feel better about themselves during sexual activities.

💡Fantasy Mismatch

Fantasy mismatch occurs when the sexual fantasies or desires of partners do not align, leading to feelings of discomfort or fear of judgment. The script describes how this mismatch can cause sexual aversion if one partner feels embarrassed or uncomfortable about the other's fantasies.

💡Fear of Intimacy

Fear of intimacy is the apprehension or anxiety about becoming emotionally or physically close to another person. The video mentions this fear in relation to sexual activities, such as penetration, where the fear of pain or performance can lead to avoidance or aversion of sex.

💡Negative Self-Talk

Negative self-talk involves the continuous internalization of negative thoughts or statements about oneself. In the video, it is discussed as a factor contributing to sexual aversion, as constant negative thoughts about one's sexual organs or performance can create a negative association with sex.

💡Postpartum or Post-Surgery

Postpartum or post-surgery refers to the period following childbirth or surgery, which can affect an individual's sexual health and desire. The script mentions these as potential triggers for sexual aversion due to physical and emotional changes that can impact one's comfort and confidence in sexual activities.

💡Sexual Counseling

Sexual counseling is a professional service that helps individuals address and overcome issues related to their sexual health, including sexual aversion. The video script suggests seeking the advice of a good sexual counselor and engaging in therapy as important steps in resolving sexual aversion.

Highlights

Initiating sex may not be appropriate if your partner frequently rejects or postpones it.

Sexual shame could be a result of body image issues, such as concerns about breast size, flabbiness, or hair growth.

Turning off the lights during sex is a common practice due to discomfort with one's body.

Openness and bravery in sexual encounters are essential for overcoming shame.

If you are troubled by body image issues, it may lead to a consistent avoidance of sex.

Experimenting with nightwear can be a way to feel more comfortable during sexual activities.

It's important to see how you look through your partner's eyes, not your own, to combat shame.

Mismatched fantasies between partners can lead to feelings of shame and avoidance of sexual activities.

Fear of pain or discomfort during penetration is a common concern that can lead to sexual shame.

Society's expectations and the fear of not meeting them can cause sexual shame.

Negative self-talk and exposure to media that perpetuates unrealistic body standards can contribute to sexual shame.

Events such as post-pregnancy, post-surgery, and other life changes can induce sexual shame.

If a partner speaks negatively about your body, it can hinder your sexual life and cause shame.

Seeking advice from a good sex counselor and undergoing therapy is important to overcome sexual shame.

The speaker offers consultation services for those experiencing sexual shame.

Staying connected and open to discussing sexual shame issues with the speaker is encouraged.

The speaker provides contact information for further consultation and support.

Transcripts

play00:00

बहुत से पुरुष और महिलाएं सेक्स को इसलिए

play00:02

इनिशिएटिव

play00:09

उनका अ अवेलेबल रहना शायद सही नहीं है अगर

play00:13

आपका भी पार्टनर आपको बार-बार मना करता जा

play00:15

रहा है या कल पे डालता जा रहा है या इतना

play00:18

ओपन होता नहीं है अपने कपड़े बहुत आसानी

play00:20

से नहीं उतारता है आपके लिए अवेलेबल है

play00:23

लेकिन यह चीज करने के लिए रेडी नहीं हो

play00:26

रहा है और यह सिर्फ शादी से पहले नहीं अगर

play00:28

शादी के बाद भी आपके मैरिज में काफी सारे

play00:31

डिलेज हो रहे हैं और आपका पार्टनर आपको

play00:33

अनइंटरेस्टेड सा दिखता है तो डेफिनेटली यह

play00:36

सेक्सुअल शेम हो सकती है इस वीडियो में

play00:38

मैं पूरा डिटेल में बात करूंगी कि यह क्या

play00:41

होता है और अगर यह है तो कैसे इसे ठीक

play00:43

किया जाए अगर आपको खुद को लगता है कि मुझे

play00:46

थोड़ा सा शर्म या थोड़ी सी झक रहती है तो

play00:48

खुद कैसे इसे ठीक करें पूरा हम डिटेल में

play00:51

बात करेंगे मैं हूं डॉक्टर नेहा मेहता

play00:53

आपकी अपनी सेक्सुअल हेल्थ काउंसलर अगर आप

play00:55

इस चैनल पे नए हैं सब्सक्राइब करो और यह

play00:57

वीडियो बहुत इंपॉर्टेंट है तो इसे शेयर

play01:00

जरूर

play01:07

करो तो चलिए हम बात कर रहे थे सेक्सुअल

play01:10

शेम की बहुत बार हम अपनी बॉडी को लेके

play01:13

कॉन्फिडेंट नहीं होते जैसे अ मेरा ब्रेस्ट

play01:17

साइज क्या है मेरे

play01:19

फ्लैप्ड मेरे बाल कहीं आ रहे हैं मैं

play01:21

हाइजीनिकली अच्छा नहीं दिखता मैं काला हूं

play01:24

मैं गोरा हूं मेरी बॉडी कैसी है मैं ये

play01:25

पोजीशन ले पाऊंगा या नहीं तो वहां पे आपका

play01:28

जो बॉडी इमेज है वो एक बहुत बड़ा कहीं ना

play01:31

कहीं ऑब्स्ट कल है आपके सेक्सुअल शेम का

play01:33

बहुत लोग तभी लाइट बंद करके करना चाहते

play01:35

हैं क्योंकि वो अपनी बॉडी को लेक बहुत

play01:37

ज्यादा कंफर्टेबल नहीं होते इस तरह का ओपन

play01:40

होना या किसी भी तरीके से करने का

play01:44

ब्रेवनेस बहुत इंपॉर्टेंट है अगर आप इस

play01:47

तरह की बॉडी इमेज इशू से ग्रसित हैं तो

play01:49

डेफिनेटली सेक्स आपको कभी भी पसंद नहीं

play01:51

आएगा और आप इसको करने को टालते रहोगे या

play01:54

सही मूमेंट का वेट करोगे बहुत से लोग अपनी

play01:57

नाइट ड्रेस को इतना एक्सपेरिमेंट करते हैं

play01:59

क्योंकि उन्हें लगता है कि शायद वो उसमें

play02:01

कंफर्टेबल नहीं है जबकि सेक्स इज एन ओपन

play02:04

वल्नरेबल अमाउंट तो वहां पर आप कैसा दिख

play02:08

रहे हैं वो आपके पार्टनर की आंखों से

play02:09

देखना चाहिए अपनी आंखों से नहीं तो अगर

play02:12

आपका पार्टनर कंफर्टेबल है तो इस शेम को

play02:14

आप किक आउट कर सकते हैं दूसरा अलग फैंटसीज

play02:18

जब बहुत बार आपके पार्टनर और आपकी फैंटसीज

play02:20

बहुत अलग होती हैं तो आप वहां डरते हैं

play02:22

आपको शेम महसूस होने लगती है कि कैसे करने

play02:25

को कह रहा है यार ये कैसे करने को कह रही

play02:27

है मुझसे तो नहीं हो रहा ऐसे और वहां पे

play02:29

आप ंडर रीलोकेट कर देते हैं अगर आपका

play02:31

पार्टनर आपको मान लो कहता है कि मैं तो

play02:34

सिर्फ पैरों के साथ करूंगा आज हम ऐसे

play02:36

करेंगे आज हम उल्टा तो यू फील सो अनकंफर्ट

play02:38

बल तो अगर आप दोनों की फैंटसीज मैच नहीं

play02:41

करती तो आपको शर्म आती है आप नहीं करना

play02:43

चाहते और आप इसे टालना शुरू करते हैं

play02:45

तीसरा फियर ऑफ फैंटेसी बहुत बार हमें

play02:48

सेक्स करने का डर होता है जैसे पेनिट्रेशन

play02:51

होगा तो दर्द होगा बहुत दर्द होगा इतना

play02:54

समय लगेगा फीमेल की तो कुछ अलग ही

play02:56

एक्सपेक्टेशन होती हैं मैं पूरी नहीं कर

play02:59

पाया तो मेरा साइज ठीक नहीं है तो मेरे को

play03:01

इतना टाइम ना लगा तो इसे हम बोलते हैं

play03:03

फियर ऑफ इंटिमेसी और ये इंटिमेसी सोसाइटी

play03:06

में सुनसुन के हमने ज्यादा रीलोकेट की है

play03:08

तो अगर आपको ये फियर है तो भी आपको शेम

play03:12

आएगा आपको आपका पार्टनर खुद से भी आगे

play03:15

होगा तो भी आप उसे टाल दोगे क्योंकि आपको

play03:17

डर लग रहा है आपको लग रहा है मैं नहीं कर

play03:18

पाया तो इसने एक इमेज बना लेनी है और फिर

play03:20

मेरी शादी टूट जाएगी मैं ऐसी दिखी और इससे

play03:23

पता चला कि मैं काला है और ये है तो वो

play03:25

नहीं करेगा स देर आर लॉट्स ऑफ शेम्स

play03:27

एसोसिएटेड तो उससे एक अच्छी कम के साथ

play03:30

सॉल्व करना बहुत इंपॉर्टेंट है और इन

play03:33

अवेयरनेस और इंफॉर्मेशन भी इक्वली

play03:35

इंपॉर्टेंट है इसके अलावा अगर आप नेगेटिव

play03:38

सेल्फ टॉक करते हैं या फिर खुद को बार-बार

play03:40

नेगेटिव बोलते रहते हैं या फिर आप मार्केट

play03:43

में आने वाले ऐसे प्रसारण को देख रहे हैं

play03:45

जो आपको बार-बार ये एहसास दिला रहे हैं कि

play03:47

आपके सेक्सुअल ऑर्गन्स ठीक नहीं है आप ठीक

play03:49

नहीं कर रहे हैं या आपने कभी किया ही नहीं

play03:51

है सिर्फ सुनी सुनाई बातें हैं तो वो

play03:53

डेफिनेटली सेक्सुअल शेम का कारण बनती हैं

play03:56

स्पेशली पोस्ट प्रेगनेंसी वेट गेन कोई

play03:59

पोस्ट सर्जरी बहुत सारी ऐसी चीजें हैं जो

play04:02

आपके अंदर सेक्सुअल शेम डाल सकती हैं अगर

play04:05

आपका पार्टनर आपको गलत तरीके से बोलता है

play04:07

चाहे वो चलते-चलते आपको बोल रहा है कि आप

play04:09

मोटे लग रहे हो बट वो आपके सेक्सुअल लाइफ

play04:11

में एक

play04:13

हिंड्रिंग

play04:17

एक अच्छे सेक्स काउंसलर की सलाह लेना और

play04:20

थेरेपी करना इंपॉर्टेंट है आप चाहें और

play04:23

ऐसा कुछ फेस कर रहे हैं तो मुझसे भी

play04:24

कंसल्टेशन बुक कर सकते हैं

play04:29

रहे ऐसे वीडियोस के लिए कनेक्टेड रहे और

play04:31

अगर आपने भी अपनी लाइफ में ऐसे कभी

play04:33

सेक्सुअल शेम महसूस किया है तो आप मुझसे

play04:35

खुल के बात कर सकते हैं आप मेरे

play04:48

instagram.com और वॉइस वीडियो चैट या

play04:53

क्लिनिकल कंसल्टेशन बुक करें आप कॉल भी कर

play04:56

सकते हैं

play04:58

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