get out of rock bottom once and for all ✧ time to wake up

Summary

This motivational video script addresses individuals struggling with life's hardships and offers a fresh perspective. The speaker, Mae, empathizes with the audience's pain and encourages embracing the opportunity to change, as hitting rock bottom can be a catalyst for self-improvement. She shares her personal journey and insights on overcoming adversity, emphasizing the importance of self-love, positive thinking, and taking action. The script promotes self-empowerment, challenging the victim mentality, and advocating for proactive life changes, including mental and physical well-being, to create a better future.

Takeaways

• 🌟 Reaching rock bottom can provide a unique perspective and an opportunity to start anew with nothing left to lose.
• 🔄 Hitting breaking points can be crucial for personal growth, as it forces individuals out of their comfort zones.
• 🚫 Society often values comfort over personal development, even when that comfort is within a state of misery.
• 💪 Taking action and moving out of discomfort is a key step towards self-improvement and change.
• 🤗 Learning to love and value oneself is a vital part of the process of overcoming adversity.
• 🔑 Recognizing that you have the power to change your circumstances is the first step to taking control of your life.
• 🚫 Avoiding the victim mentality and not blaming others for one's situation is crucial for personal empowerment.
• 🧠 The mind is a powerful tool that can either reinforce negative self-beliefs or foster positive change.
• 🌱 The process of self-improvement is likened to a marathon, not a sprint, emphasizing the importance of incremental progress.
• 🍎 Paying attention to one's diet and physical health is as important as mental well-being in the journey towards self-improvement.
• 🌱 The idea that 'crap makes great fertilizer' and 'phoenix rises from the ashes' symbolizes the potential for rebirth and growth from difficult situations.

Q & A

What is the main message of the video script?

The main message of the video script is about overcoming adversity and personal growth. It emphasizes the importance of taking responsibility for one's life, breaking out of comfort zones, and making positive changes to improve one's situation.

Why does the speaker suggest that hitting rock bottom can be a turning point in one's life?

The speaker suggests that hitting rock bottom can be a turning point because it often forces individuals out of their comfort zones and compels them to take action to change their circumstances, leading to personal growth and new perspectives.

What does the speaker mean by 'You have nothing left to lose' after reaching rock bottom?

The phrase 'You have nothing left to lose' implies that when one has hit their lowest point, they are in a position where they can only move forward and improve, as the fear of losing more is no longer a barrier to taking action.

Why does the speaker criticize the comfort in misery that people often seek?

The speaker criticizes the comfort in misery because it prevents people from making necessary changes in their lives. This comfort can keep individuals stuck in unhealthy patterns and situations, even when they are unhappy.

What is the significance of the speaker's statement 'Crap makes great fertilizer and phoenix rises from the ashes'?

This statement is a metaphor for the idea that adversity and difficult experiences can serve as a foundation for growth and rebirth, much like how manure enriches soil for new growth and a phoenix is reborn from its ashes.

What does the speaker advise against when discussing the word 'circumstance'?

The speaker advises against giving power to the word 'circumstance' because it implies a passive acceptance of one's situation. Instead, the speaker encourages taking control of one's life and not letting external factors define who you are.

What is the importance of self-love and self-worth according to the speaker?

According to the speaker, self-love and self-worth are crucial because they form the foundation for personal growth and positive change. By valuing oneself, an individual is better equipped to make decisions that improve their life and well-being.

Why does the speaker emphasize the need to stop being passive about one's life?

The speaker emphasizes the need to stop being passive because passivity can lead to stagnation and a lack of progress. Active engagement in one's life is necessary to make meaningful changes and to take advantage of opportunities for growth.

What role does the speaker believe thoughts and self-talk play in shaping one's reality?

The speaker believes that thoughts and self-talk play a significant role in shaping one's reality because they can influence one's mindset, actions, and overall well-being. Positive self-talk can lead to a more positive outlook and better outcomes.

How does the speaker relate the concept of 'cleanliness' to mental clarity and well-being?

The speaker relates cleanliness to mental clarity and well-being by suggesting that a clean and organized physical space can promote a clear and focused mind. This can lead to better decision-making and a more positive state of mind.

What is the speaker's view on the importance of taking small, incremental steps towards change?

The speaker views small, incremental steps as essential for sustainable change. By focusing on making small improvements daily, one can gradually build momentum and achieve significant progress over time without becoming overwhelmed.

What advice does the speaker give regarding the consumption of highly processed foods?

The speaker advises against the consumption of highly processed foods, which can have negative impacts on health and well-being. Instead, they recommend eating whole foods and being mindful of the nutritional content of what one consumes.

How does the speaker define 'winning' in the context of personal growth and overcoming adversity?

In the context of personal growth and overcoming adversity, the speaker defines 'winning' as the continuous process of learning and improving, rather than a specific end goal. Winning is about the journey and the effort put in, not just the outcome.

Outlines

00:00

📉 Overcoming Adversity and Embracing New Perspectives

The speaker begins by addressing the audience who may be experiencing significant pain and discomfort from life's challenges, suggesting they have reached a breaking point. However, this is reframed as an opportunity to gain a unique perspective that many do not have access to. The speaker posits that hitting rock bottom can be a catalyst for change, as it forces one out of their comfort zone, which is often a place of misery. The message is one of empowerment, urging the audience to take action and make changes in their lives, starting with self-love and valuing themselves more. The speaker introduces herself as Mae and offers to share her own experiences and steps she took to overcome adversity and improve her life.

05:01

🚫 Breaking Free from the Comfort of Misery

In this paragraph, the speaker discusses societal norms that keep individuals in a state of comfort, even when it leads to unhappiness. She emphasizes the importance of stepping out of this comfort zone and taking action to improve one's life. The speaker challenges the audience to stop being passive and to stop letting external opinions define their self-worth. She encourages the audience to take responsibility for their lives, to find ways to make money if they lack it, and to protect their energy from toxic influences. The speaker also introduces the concept of replacing the word 'circumstance' with 'situation' to empower the audience to see that they can influence their conditions and that these are temporary and can be changed.

10:03

💧 The Power of Positive Thoughts and Self-Talk

The speaker introduces the concept of the power of thought, using the water experiment by Dr. Masaru Emoto as an example to illustrate how positive and negative thoughts can affect physical reality. She explains that the molecular structure of water changes in response to positive and negative words, suggesting a similar impact on the human body, which is largely composed of water. The speaker advises the audience to be mindful of their self-talk, to counter negative thoughts with positive affirmations, and to treat themselves with kindness and respect. She also mentions the importance of letting go of a victim mentality and taking control of one's life.

15:03

🌱 Cultivating Self-Awareness and Personal Growth

The speaker emphasizes the importance of self-awareness and personal growth, encouraging the audience to evaluate their lives and take inventory of their behaviors, reactions to stress, and self-concept. She suggests that facing one's fears, such as looking at oneself in the mirror, is a crucial step towards self-improvement. The speaker also touches on the connection between physical environment and mental state, advocating for cleanliness and organization as a means to achieve a calmer and more focused mind. She stresses the importance of incremental change and consistency in forming new habits for a better lifestyle.

20:03

🍏 Prioritizing Health and Nutritional Awareness

In this paragraph, the speaker discusses the importance of health and nutrition, urging the audience to be conscious of what they put into their bodies. She points out the role of food as a coping mechanism and criticizes the prevalence of highly processed foods designed to be addictive. The speaker shares her personal struggles with food addiction and how educating herself about the effects of such foods on her body led to a change in her eating habits. She encourages the audience to research and learn about the impact of their dietary choices on their health and to make informed decisions to improve their well-being.

25:04

💪 Mental and Physical Preparedness for Life's Challenges

The speaker stresses the importance of being mentally and physically prepared to handle life's challenges. She argues that taking care of oneself, being motivated, and practicing self-kindness are essential for overcoming adversity. The speaker also addresses the interconnectedness of physical health and mental well-being, noting that poor health can exacerbate stress and make it difficult to achieve goals. She encourages the audience to focus on the root causes of their problems and to make necessary changes to improve their overall well-being, rather than relying on superficial fixes.

30:07

🏆 Embracing the Journey of Self-Improvement

In the final paragraph, the speaker reflects on the journey of self-improvement, emphasizing that it is a marathon, not a sprint. She advises the audience to pace themselves and to show up every day, working towards their goals consistently. The speaker shares her belief that the process of working towards goals is more rewarding than the end result and encourages the audience to find joy in the journey. She also reminds the audience that life is full of challenges and that the key to success is in the willingness to learn and grow from these experiences. The speaker concludes by expressing her belief in the audience's ability to overcome obstacles and achieve their goals.

Keywords

💡Rock Bottom

Rock bottom refers to the lowest point in a situation or a person's life, typically characterized by extreme adversity or distress. In the video's context, it symbolizes a turning point where one has hit their limit and is forced to confront their circumstances. The script mentions 'hitting rock bottom' as a necessary step for some to gain a new perspective and the impetus to change their lives.

💡Breaking Point

A breaking point is the moment when a person can no longer withstand stress or pressure and is compelled to take action. The video emphasizes the importance of reaching this point as it often leads to a shift in mindset, propelling individuals to escape their comfort zones and initiate change, as illustrated by the speaker's own experiences.

💡Comfort Zone

The comfort zone is a metaphorical space where a person feels safe, familiar, and at ease. The script discusses the societal tendency to remain in this zone even when it leads to misery, highlighting the need to step out of it to experience growth and transformation.

💡Self-Love

Self-love is the act of appreciating and caring for oneself. The video encourages embracing self-love as part of the process of overcoming adversity, suggesting that learning to value and love oneself is crucial for personal development and for setting up a better life.

💡Coping Mechanisms

Coping mechanisms are strategies used to manage stress or emotional pain. The script warns against relying on unhealthy coping mechanisms, such as overeating or living in clutter, and instead advocates for facing problems head-on as a means of personal growth.

💡Mindset Shift

A mindset shift refers to a significant change in one's perspective or way of thinking. The video speaks to the power of undergoing such a shift to stop being passive and start taking control of one's life, which is essential for moving beyond a state of rock bottom.

💡Toxicity

Toxicity in the video refers to harmful influences or relationships that can impede personal growth. The speaker advises identifying and removing oneself from toxic situations or people as part of the journey towards self-improvement.

💡Self-Awareness

Self-awareness is the ability to recognize and understand one's own emotions, motivations, and actions. The script highlights the importance of developing self-awareness to identify areas of life that require change and to take responsibility for one's actions.

💡Inner Work

Inner work involves self-reflection and personal development. The video emphasizes that before tackling larger life goals, one must engage in inner work to address mental and emotional well-being, which is foundational for achieving broader aspirations.

💡Incremental Change

Incremental change refers to making small, gradual improvements over time. The script encourages embracing this approach to avoid burnout and to build sustainable habits, stating that consistent small efforts lead to significant transformation over time.

💡Victim Mentality

A victim mentality is a mindset where an individual perceives themselves as a victim of their circumstances. The video challenges this perspective, urging viewers to take control of their narrative and to stop blaming external factors for their situation.

💡Education and Research

Education and research are emphasized in the script as tools for empowerment. By learning and researching, individuals can make informed decisions about their health, relationships, and life choices, which is key to breaking free from cycles of adversity.

💡Food Addiction

Food addiction is a term used to describe an unhealthy relationship with food, often characterized by compulsive eating. The script uses this concept to illustrate how certain coping mechanisms, like overeating, can exacerbate problems and the importance of understanding the impact of food on one's well-being.

💡Probiotics

Probiotics are live bacteria and yeasts that are good for the gut. The video mentions probiotics as part of a healthier diet that can help restore energy and motivation, emphasizing the link between gut health and overall well-being.

💡Self-Sabotage

Self-sabotage is the act of unconsciously or consciously acting in ways that undermine one's own success. The script discusses how certain behaviors, such as eating unhealthy foods or living in disarray, can be forms of self-sabotage that keep individuals stuck in negative cycles.

💡Present Moment

The present moment refers to the current, immediate experience without distraction from past or future concerns. The video encourages living in the present to alleviate anxiety and to focus on the positive actions that can be taken right now for self-improvement.

💡Ignorance Tax

Ignorance tax is a term used in the video to describe the costs incurred due to a lack of knowledge or awareness. It suggests that being uninformed can lead to negative consequences, and that investing in self-education can prevent these outcomes.

Highlights

Experiencing rock bottom can provide a unique perspective and a fresh start in life.

Hitting rock bottom can be a catalyst for change, forcing one out of their comfort zone.

Society often values comfort over personal growth, even when it leads to misery.

The process of overcoming adversity can lead to self-improvement and increased self-worth.

Mae shares personal experiences to inspire change and self-improvement.

Successful people often experience significant setbacks before finding success.

Gaining freedom from harmful influences can provide a new start and fresh perspective.

The word 'circumstance' can be replaced with 'situation' to empower personal change.

Negative self-talk can have physical effects, as demonstrated by the water experiment.

Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT) can provide new perspectives on personal challenges.

Dr. Albert Ellis's quote emphasizes the importance of self-compassion in emotional well-being.

Taking responsibility for one's actions and reactions is key to personal growth.

Evaluating and understanding one's life through self-inventory can lead to positive change.

Maintaining a clean environment can improve mental clarity and well-being.

A healthy diet and lifestyle can have profound effects on one's energy and motivation.

Educating oneself about the impact of food and lifestyle choices is crucial for self-improvement.

Small, incremental daily changes can lead to significant long-term improvements.

Facing and combating negative thoughts is essential for overcoming anxiety and despair.

The importance of showing up and doing the work to achieve goals and success.

Life is a journey, and the process of self-improvement should be embraced for its inherent rewards.

Transcripts

Are you in pain from spiraling and hitting rock bottom?

And are you sick and tired of it?

You're probably here

because a series of events or things have happened to you

recently that's so traumatic,

that you feel like you reach your breaking point.

But guess what?

You've actually gained this new perspective

that not a lot of people in this world can gain access to.

In a way, you're lucky because now

you have nothing left to lose.

And it's actually crucial

sometimes that you hit this rock bottom,

you hit your breaking point.

One of the biggest pitfalls of society

is that we're all too comfortable.

We'll do anything to stay in this comfort

than to do something really hard for ourselves,

even if it makes us miserable.

We're comfortable even in our state of misery.

And, you know, if you hit the breaking point,

you hit rock bottom

and you get a new perspective on things

like you're somehow, like forced out of that comfort zone

and now you can actually take action

and do something about it.

And in the way that's something that most people even

don't even get to experience.

Because when you get to this point,

you're so sick and tired that you do anything

to make yourself feel better,

to get out of this discomfort.

And in this process,

you start learning a lot of things

and you actually value yourself a lot more and,

you know, learn to love yourself

more and others around you

and actually set yourself up for the rest of your life.

Hi, I'm Mae and welcome to my channel.

So I have been exactly in your shoes

before many times,

and I'm going to tell you exactly

what actually clicked for me

the last time I hit my breaking point

where I will never have to return to that place again.

And I'll tell you about all these different steps

I had to take to get out of the situation

and set myself up for a better life.

that I'm experiencing right now

and I'm doing this

because I want to help people,

and I want to help people get out of their discomfort

and actually learn to become better people.

Because I'll tell you the one thing that's worse

than hitting rock bottom

and that's if you

decide to just stay there and rot

and be passive about your life

and just rot for the rest of your life.

And truly,

the only way to lose in life

is if you decide to just give up completely,

and that's when you become a loser.

If you're watching this video right now,

you've actually decided to take action,

which is half the battle won.

And I'm thinking about all of these people in life, right,

who found success

and they all had to experience

some kind of major setback,

whether it's a terrible divorce or maybe they’re

so addicted

to different kind of things like substances

or food or people or the environment

that they just reached a breaking point.

Or maybe they lost everything.

They lost all their money or,

you know, everything they owned or something.

And they usually gain a new thing.

They either gain an abundance of free time.

They gain

freedom away from the people who are doing them harm.

Or maybe they just gain like a fresh canvas, a new start,

a new perspective on things.

And all these successful people.

They have to first experience

severe hardship in order to know what they're missing

and to feel like

they're forced to let go of whatever

they're experiencing in order to make way for new things.

If you don't know what you're lacking,

you don't know what you're missing out on,

and they're forced to let go of

whatever they're experiencing in life

before they even knew that that was an option.

And prior to you reaching this breaking point,

you might not even know that it was an option.

Think about it this way, right?

Like crap

makes great fertilizer and phoenix rises from the ashes.

So I don't find this word circumstance

to benefit anybody at all.

It just does not serve anybody. Because what does it mean?

It means something or a situation

or event or something terrible,

whatever, good or bad happens to you.

And then you just decide

to let it happen, to give your power away

to this thing or event or situation.

And that means giving your power away

to this word circumstance.

Do you think all these people out there

who are like super

majorly successful, who came from nothing

and there's so many,

so many stories of all these people,

do you think they let their circumstances of having nothing

define who they are? Like? Absolutely not.

And this is not fantasy. This is real life.

There's people living on the same planet,

doing all of these things

and constantly defying their circumstances.

And if they can do it, why can't you?

But you're not doing it right now

because you're giving your power

away to the word circumstance.

So abolish that word immediately.

And remember, one thing cannot lead to another

unless you decide that it does.

So you need to stop being passive about your life

and stop rotting away.

And stop letting other people's opinions

define who you are,

whether it's family members or your friends

who are bullying you and telling you

that you're not good enough. You never amount to anything.

Those words

don't mean anything

unless you decide that it does,

that it means something to you.

And if you decide to let other people's words

just chip away at you

and you just let it infest your mind or right your brain,

then you're just going to be even more miserable

and clearly,

whatever you're doing right now is not working.

And the same thing goes of your environment

and whatever conditions that you're subjecting yourself to.

If you don't like something,

if you don't like the way things are,

you can do something about it. It's possible.

And I know what you're thinking, right?

Like, Oh, it's all my fault.

I'm trapped with an abusive partner and that I'm like,

stuck in the family that I'm born with.

And it's not my fault that I have a terrible boss, and,

you know,

I'm working some dead end job off with like,

that doesn't pay me a lot and takes up all of my time.

And I don't have a good support system

and I can't do anything.

And it's not, you know... I'm not responsible.

I need you to start taking your head out of your ass.

Do you think all these successful people,

these billionaires, they let their friends and family

tell them who they are and their enemies get to your head?

No, obviously not.

These people don't just choose to go with the wind.

Guess what? Life is not that easy.

It's hard for everyone,

in fact,

choosing to give your power away to all these negativity

and creating this negative feedback loop and

and just spiraling and wallowing is the easy way out.

That's the comfortable way.

And guess what?

The more you choose to wallow in all the sadness

like misery loves company,

and you're here right now

because things are not working out for you.

And clearly

you don't want to take the easy way out anymore.

And I know that you don't deserve this.

And deep down, I know you know that.

And it's obvious that circumstances aren't

actually real

because people are constantly defying them

and they're constantly transcending them.

And I know I talk about this

word a lot,

but the one word that you can replace

the word circumstance with

is the word situation

itself, saying, I'm in this circumstance,

you can see that I'm dealing with this situation.

I'm in this situation right now

because you know what the difference between

the words circumstance and situation is?

The word situation means that an event or whatever,

a condition or something happens to you. It comes and goes.

It can come instantly.

It can go instantly and it will pass. Things will pass.

But something that you can do something about

and you know what will happen

if you just keep waiting for things to change.

One day you're going to grow old

and you're going to be 60

and you're going to wake up

and think about all the chances you've had in your youth

to do something about your life.

And you didn't do it because what would you rather have?

The pain of discipline or the pain of regret?

Literally.

What is stopping

you from just moving across the country or across the globe

and just cutting out all these toxic people in your life

and just start fresh?

And I know what you're thinking.

But Mae, that requires

a lot of privilege and requires money.

I don't have privilege. I don’t have money.

I don't have this. I don't have that.

Well, if you want it badly enough, you will find a way,

no matter what.

If you don't have money, you'll find a way to make money.

And if you’re stuck with toxic people,

stuck with a toxic family,

you're going to find ways to protect your energy.

So if you stop giving away energy to all these people,

and then as soon as you can, you can move out of your house

and you can get away from toxic situations

and a common thread of all these things

that I'm trying to get at.

You have the power to change things

and you're giving away too much of your power

away to all of these events or people or things

that surround them.

You know, your thoughts

and the things that you tell yourself every day.

It reinforces everything around you.

It creates your world. It creates your reality.

So if you're telling yourself things like, I'm so ugly,

I have no money, I have no

no future, I have no future prospects, I have no friends.

And people don't care about me and nobody loves me.

And, you know, I don't I don't deserve these things.

I don't deserve success.

I don't deserve love, it’s hard for me to find love.

Think about all these things that you’re telling yourself,

especially if they sound familiar to you.

Your mind is so powerful.

It is so powerful.

Would you say these words to your dog?

Would you say these words to someone you love?

Would you say those words to

someone that you're a huge fan of, like a pop star?

Like, would you say like if you're a fan of Taylor Swift,

would you say this to Taylor Swift?

No.

Then why do you why are you talking like this to yourself?

Stop it.

You’ll never say this to like a stranger on the street

or like your neighbor.

So that just means that sometimes, like,

we truly are our own worst enemy.

So you need to stop all the negativity and negative

thoughts and try and counter

all these thoughts with something positive.

If you’re saying I don't deserve anything.

I deserve everything.

I deserve to have money. I deserve to have success.

I deserve love, I deserve one.

And just try and tell yourself that

and like counter every negative thought that you come

across, become aware of it,

and then counter it and see where that takes you.

Have you guys heard of the water experiment?

It's a really famous experiment from the seventies.

It's by this Japanese scientist called Dr.

Masaru Emoto, and I actually have this book right here.

It's like one of my favorite books and I live by this.

And to summarize this book, basically

he did this experiment with water

to see if the vibrations

and the thought frequencies

that he gives to the water to see

if it actually changes anything.

So there's three glasses of water.

The first glass. He said positive things to it.

He gave it positive energy every day.

He said positive words like beautiful, gorgeous angel.

And in the second glass of water, he prayed into it.

Different religions,

just different prayers with different religions.

He was praying into it and saying

similarly positive things like in the form of prayer.

And in the third glass

he said, just ugly words, you’re ugly, terrible, awful

demon hell. And then guess what happened?

The first two glasses of water,

the molecular structure of the water, actually changed

into beautiful crystals.

Like they became gorgeous and beautiful,

and it became more

and more beautiful as the days

went by that he was reinforcing

all of these positivity into it.

And then guess what happened to the third glass?

It turned into ugly, dull looking,

just like ugly looking crystals.

I mean, not even crystals.

They just look like, spiky and just like ugly and

awful looking.

And it literally changed

the molecular structure of the water. It changed the water.

And then if you think about it,

the human body is made of two thirds water.

So if you're saying negative things to yourself

and you're telling yourself that you’re ugly and that,

you know, your face is full of pimples

and guess what's going to happen?

Your thoughts will transmit to the rest of your body

like blood circulating in your in your system.

So do you see how important it is to be nice to yourself

and to be kind to yourself? Here's this other thing.

Stop with the victim mentality.

Stop blaming everything and everyone around you.

You know, stop saying like, oh, it's not my fault...

This and that’s happening to me,

you know, the way you think about your situation,

all these things and all these people around you,

it's not really on them. It's

your reflection of what you really think about

the way you feel about yourself and the way you feel about,

the state of mind that you're in. Like...

all these other people.

They don't know what's going on in your head.

They can't read minds. Only you can read your mind.

So if you think about it,

these people are not coming to save you,

only you can save yourself.

Other people

are too preoccupied with their own problems

and their own issues that like,

why would they come and save you?

If you feel really sorry for yourself

and you tell everybody like maybe... maybe

they feel sorry for you,

you know, maybe they feel a bit sympathetic towards you

but then they’re not going to be here forever.

And then feel sorry for you forever.

Like,

if you keep doing that to other people,

you become a burden to others.

And most of all, you become a burden to yourself.

Even if your friends come and give you an intervention.

Right?

Like you're not going to want to hear it

unless you come into that realization yourself.

Like,

you can only accept the help that you think you deserve.

I'm here to tell you this.

You deserve it.

You do deserve the help that you think you need.

But I can't help you understand that only you can.

And you know,

if you're

going to bet on like people coming in

to save you or like situations

to change or things to change, then you're just gambling.

You're playing the lottery.

And if you want to gamble, if you want to bet,

you can bet on yourself.

You can bet on a plan, a plan

that you have to succeed, right?

Like change the word “Why” to “What”.

Instead of saying why is this happening to me,

say what am I going to do about it?

What am I going to do to fix the situation that I'm in?

And what can I do for myself today?

You know what the magic of all of this is?

The magic of starting

to shift the focus into building yourself

and working on yourself

instead of just like thinking about,

why is the world so unfair to you.

For people who have gone to therapy

or for people who have heard of this term cognitive

behavioral therapy or CBT, which, by the way,

I really recommend therapy

if you can afford it, if you have the opportunity to do so,

because it helps you see things

from a different perspective.

That your therapist can show you

that you don't really immediately

see in yourself, which is really great.

Anyway, the founder of CBT, Dr.

Albert Ellis, says this quote

If you stop

damning yourself

and other unkind situations or other people around you,

you find it

virtually impossible

to be upset, emotionally upset about anything.

And isn't that amazing?

If you think about it,

if you stop damning things and damning everything

and everyone around you,

you feel unbothered by the situation, you'll

be unbothered and

that's a huge burden off your back.

Like you no longer feel bothered about anything anymore.

If you just start owning your own __,

you can free yourself from a lot of things, from the burden

of like all this negative reinforcement

that you've been feeding yourself.

And, you know, people who reach rock bottom, they're lucky

because they gain a new perspective on things.

They have nothing left to lose.

So they can start all over again from a blank canvas.

And once you have this state of mind like this mind shift

and stop giving you

your power away to people and things

and situations and start giving yourself power

and you start becoming responsible for your own action

and the way you react to things.

That's when things change

and that's how things have shifted for me.

There's one other thing that people can’t take away from

you no matter what. Like,

whatever you've lost,

whether its money or whatever, or your house or whatever.

Like nobody can take your mind away from you.

Nobody can take the things

that you've learned away from you,

your education, your skills.

Now I can sit comfortably in that

I can think about like all of the things

that I've learned in the past,

the like all of this shitty situations I've been in

and like all of the things I learn from that.

Okay, so the next thing that you need to do

is to evaluate your entire life

and take inventory about everything,

your behavioral patterns,

your character, your personality,

the way you react to situations.

How are you reacting to stress in your life?

Like what do you think of yourself?

Like what is your self-concept?

What is your concept of your own identity?

And this might be very hard for some people.

Like, you know, like you might be the kind of person

who's afraid to even look at yourself in the mirror.

And if you're afraid of yourself,

you'll never be able to be fully accountable

and fully be self aware.

And that is the hard work that I'm talking about.

You need to be able to do this.

If you're afraid of looking at yourself in the mirror,

start doing that. Start looking at yourself in the mirror.

And you know,

the next thing is if you're thinking,

if you're looking at yourself in the mirror,

you're like, Oh, so ugly, so, you know, like,

my skin is so bad.

Counteract those thoughts with like,

I'm beautiful, I'm deserving of love. I love myself.

I'm kind to myself and my skin looks good today.

My skin looks good.

Once you do that,

you can start thinking about the people around you.

Your environment, like, what's good for you?

What's bad for you, and what do you need to do?

What is your plan to fix things?

In order to see all of these things

and take inventory,

you need to be willing to engage

with some hard truths and learn about yourself.

I'm not saying that this is easy work.

This is hard work. It's very difficult to do this.

But you either have to learn how to do the hard work

or else you continue on with all of the different

coping mechanisms that you've learned instead.

And just, rot into passivity, right?

You have to face some of these things head on.

Is your room clean? Is your bedroom clean?

Do you live in a state of clutter and messiness?

I know what you’re thinking some people think like, oh,

you know, I work better in a cluttered environment

and somehow I think better.

That is coping, my dear.

That is, that’s severe coping because I've gone through it

myself, like I used to tell myself, like,

Oh, you know, I'm a creative mind

and I can like live in this messy bedroom and

guess what?

That's not working for you.

That didn't work for me.

A cluttered space is a cluttered mind.

Do this favor for yourself

and just see what happens if you just clean your desk

today, spend the next week cleaning your closet.

It doesn't have to all happen in one day.

This is a marathon. This is not a sprint.

You don't do this

just one time

when you make these decisions to change your habits

and to change the things that you're so accustomed to.

You're not making this decision for one week.

You're doing this for the rest of your life

or for as long as you want to be

in this new lifestyle that you're in. Right.

Do you want to be a clean person?

Do you want to be a neat person?

Do you want to be a messy person living in messiness?

Now, I know that society

and the world, we like to romanticize some things,

we like to romanticize the drama and the messiness.

We like to be messy,

but babe, that is a coping mechanism.

Sometimes the whole world just loves to cope, you know,

because coping is comfort.

Like I said, we live in a society

that values comfort and coping.

And if you really want to change things about yourself,

you have to stop coping.

See what a clean room does to your state of mind.

I promise you, if you clean your room

and then maybe clean the rest of your house.

You'll feel a new sense of calmness.

You feel a sense of accomplishment, of like, wow,

I did that for myself today.

I've done the things that I set out to do,

that I said I was going to do it

and I did it and achieved this goal.

No matter how big or how small these goals are.

If you achieve one small goal

If you did one kind thing for yourself.

When you do these things day by day, like every day,

eventually you're going to want to do more.

And incrementally, like we do 1% every day.

You'll be in a very different place a week from now

or a month from now or six months from now,

I promise you that. And then look at your diet.

What are you eating?

Are you drinking enough water. Are you dehydrated?

Have you seen a doctor lately?

Do you know what's going on in your body?

Get a health checkup

like understand yourself a little bit more.

Understand the food that you're eating every day. Be aware.

Be conscious of what you're putting into your body.

That's the other thing, right?

You can feed yourself thoughts. Good thoughts.

But are you feeding yourself good food?

Are you drinking soda every day?

Are you drinking like sugary, ultra processed drinks?

Are you eating ultra processed food

or are you eating whole food?

Are you eating vegetables and fruits?

And I know what you're thinking right

like what

do the foods that I choose to eat,

what does that have to do with my breaking point,

my __ situation?

Well, sometimes

food is one of the big ways that we choose to learn

coping mechanisms.

And that's why convenience stores are everywhere,

because they're convenient.

And then guess what?

In these convenience stores,

most of them have convenient food, highly processed,

highly designed food...

like, Big Food, these corporations, these companies,

they spend so much money,

billions of dollars trying to figure out

what makes people want to grab the food off the shelves.

They spend so much money on focus groups, food scientists

in the food labs

that are experimenting

with all these different

kinds of potato chips

to see which one gives you the most satisfying crunch.

Literally, people are banking

and capitalizing off of your passiveness

and your wants for convenience. Your want for cope.

And food truly is like the modern designer drug.

They spend so much money on the color

and the design packages

and color of the food and the texture and the taste

to make you feel good.

Design.

It's designed to make you like want more and crave more

so you become addicted.

And that one aspect of addiction will lead to another

and will lead to another.

That's how you spiral.

If you keep choosing convenience

and the easy way out,

and the coping stuff, that's how you're choosing to live

because it becomes all these daily habits.

They add up into a lifestyle.

Actually do research on what these highly processed,

ultra processed foods are doing to your body

so you can have the education and gain

all of these learnings, education

that people cannot take away from you.

Well, I never said that change was easy.

And I even personally,

I've dealt with a lifetime of food addiction.

And it's

only after a lot of research and education

about what these foods are doing to my body,

how they change the way

I think, my dopamine levels and how they affect me

craving even more of these foods,

that make me think like, wow.

I was so tired and listless

and I had no energy

like all I wanted to do was to sleep all day

and I felt lazy and it's because of what I was eating,

the kind of food I was eating.

And it's only after I change these things

that I actually learned wow,

if I keep going down this path, I'm going to experience

irreversible health damage

and it's going to affect my life.

And that's

when I really start learning about all these foods

and actually change my behavior.

Years of years

of eating junk food, of processed food and convenient food

that I can just grab down the street.

It really took a toll on my gut.

And like, you know, your gut is connected to your brain.

Some can even say that it is your brain.

It's really only after I stopped using the easy way out

and start

eating like healthier stuff And start

eating probiotic rich foods

and probiotics can be supplements

or however

it is best

for you to supplement your diet with these nutrients

that your body is lacking.

I started getting my energy back

and subsequently I started getting my motivation back

and my desire to want to do things again.

There's all these kinds of health issues

that's that's entirely preventable.

If you just stop, like eating,

I don't know, a bag of candy every day.

You know what they put in Skittles,

food colorings that are banned.

And especially if you live in the States,

there's all these

ingredients that's banned in Europe and in Asia

that they put in foods here.

If you really just look at the ingredients

list and research what they are,

some of these things are disgusting.

You won't even eat it with a spoon...

beetle extract in skittles??

You won't know these things

unless you choose to educate yourself

and you learn about these things.

Truly, these are all of the first steps that I took

to get out of rock

bottom, is to work on myself

and that means mentally and physically,

because you really can't handle

big major stress in your life

if you're not equipped to do it,

if you're not equipped to handle

major work

stress, life stress,

because you're listless and tired all the time

and you're feeding yourself crap and your house is messy.

You're going to break, you're going to spiral,

and you're going to choose

even more coping mechanisms and negative reinforcement.

And you're just going to like spiral

and get back to go back to rock bottom.

But you're not here to do that.

And it's really important that you work on yourself

before you can work on bigger goals in your life.

And here's the other truth right?

Life is going to be hard no matter what.

Life is going to be suffering. It's going to be painful.

There's always going to be a new situation,

there’s always going to be a new problem.

And nobody's lives is truly easy.

Everybody's dealing with their own issues.

But the difference is,

whether you're equipped in your mind

and in your body to handle these things,

these situations that come at you,

that makes all the difference.

That's the difference

between spiraling back to rock bottom,

and overcoming your adversity

and overcoming these difficult things.

Because you already know how to do the things

like taking care of yourself.

You already know how to clean up after yourself.

You already know how to be motivated

and to be kind to yourself.

That puts you

in a way better position

to handle much bigger goals, difficult situations

than if you have bad health.

If you live in a messy place

and if you have people in your life

that's super toxic to you

and you don't know how to be kind to yourself,

that makes a world of difference.

If you want to lose weight.

If you want to have healthy, clear skin,

you want to have healthy hair and nails.

If you want to

find success in your job and your work and your career,

you're going to want to do all the inner work.

You're going to want to feed yourself

healthy food and healthy things and healthy thoughts.

Because no matter how much money you spend on expensive

nail polish and expensive

makeup, it's not going to account for, like,

the terrible state of your nails.

Like, if your nails break all the time, doesn't matter

how much money you spend on the nail polish, right?

It doesn't matter

how expensive your concealer is

if your skin is breaking out all the time.

And it doesn't matter if you go to a dermatologist

and try and fix all of your skin problems

if you're eating junk food

everyday, that's causing the skin problems.

You have to find the root cause of your problems

and fix it.

Because then, like all of these other things

that you're doing is are just Band-Aids to cope.

And it's only if you start with the root problems

that all of these other layers of things,

like the expensive nail polish,

the expensive makeup

and the dermatologist visits, the facials,

and that's what people capitalize on.

It's what

like plastic surgeons it’s

what big

corporations, Big Food,

they literally are banking on your own insecurities

and the things that you're not

that you don't want to face,

like consciously face, head on.

They're literally capitalizing and banking

on the fact that you choose cope.

You choose the easy way out.

And guess what?

The good things,

the things that are truly, truly good for you,

they're not going to come easy.

But you want to work hard for it because life is suffering.

No matter what.

So you want to choose

the suffering you get from working on yourself

and the suffering you get from hard work

that you're working

and striving towards your goals,

than the suffering from coping and being comfortable

and not doing anything

and being passive

and just letting people and letting corporations

and all of these worldly things walk all over you.

Choose yourself.

All of these things that happen to you,

they don't matter to you unless you let it matter to you.

Unless you saying that like wow

all the past events

that happened to me

have power over

me, only you can get out of the hole you’re in.

And only you can save yourself.

And only you can do the hard work

to work on yourself so you can become a better person.

So you can become a better person

for other people around you.

The people who live and learn,

they're the real winners they’re the real winners in life,

because the losers in life,

the people who lose, are the people who give up completely.

And they just choose to succumb to everything

and they just give up and be passive

and not want to do anything.

Think about it.

If you have no idea how to make like $1,000.

It's going to cost you $1,000

because that's ignorance taxes.

The ignorance of not knowing how to improve yourself

and improve your life. And it's going to cost you.

You're going to have to pay for that.

So if you have no idea, start

getting an idea, start learning

new things, start researching and start educating yourself

so that you can invest in yourself.

Invest the time and energy into improving your life,

because why wouldn't you want to do that?

All these things are not going to happen in one day.

So living more in the present

and focus on what you're doing right

now, don't think about why you're doing like six months

from now or like a year from now,

because that's going to give you anxiety.

Don't think about the past either because

that will give you

anxiety also.

Anxiety only exists in the past and in the future.

It doesn't exist in your present.

Give yourself the gift of your own presence

and you know what

the things that you can do right now for yourself.

And also there’s truly is no silver bullet in life.

If something lucky happens to you

or a big opportunity happens, it's

only because you can see the signs,

because you are already working towards it.

People who win the lotto, right?

They won't win the lotto

unless they show up and they buy a ticket

and they buy a ticket every time.

And the more they buy them,

the chances of them winning goes up because they show up

and they do it.

If you don't do it,

if you don't show up and do the work,

then you'll never win and the building will never end.

So just stop waiting for change to happen

and the change needs to start from you.

Like you need to be the change.

Because if you don't,

you just end up

waiting on the sidelines for something to come along

and you might not even see the opportunity

because you haven't been actively working towards it.

The only people who can find

and accelerate the success in life

is if they're already working

towards that path and trust me,

if you learn to work on yourself and learn to work

towards your goals every day, little by little,

you're going to be in a very different place

three months from now, six months, a year from now.

The feeling that you get from working hard

every day towards your goals,

and I'm not saying that this is a sprint

because you're going to burn out eventually

if you don't do everything at once

and do all the big things at once, like don't do that.

Pace yourself pace yourself, and be prepared to,

for as long as you want this to be your state of mind,

you're going to have to keep at it.

You're going to have to do this and show up every day

and every chance you get

because once you stop, you're going to go back to the way

things are going to learn to cope again.

You're going to go

the easy way out again with the feelings of achievement

you get from actually working towards it.

It’s going to be far stronger than the feelings

you actually get when you get there.

And that's the real beauty, right?

Life is truly, truly a journey.

It's not about the end goal

because the end goal is death, really.

Or if you choose to just rot

and give up and not live a life anymore

and just survive and exist.

You really need to learn to embrace

like the little joys you get from working on yourself.

Like, wow, I did this for myself.

Wow, I can do this for other people.

And learn to embrace it.

Learn to accept joy in these tasks once you’re

able to handle the little things,

then the big things and the big goals.

They’re not going to be that daunting anymore.

They’re not going to be that scary.

That's actually how I learned to fix anxiety and

get rid of it completely.

I stopped thinking about

I have to do all this big stuff next week

and it's so scary.

I don't know where to start.

Just little by little, incrementally,

you'll be able to handle even bigger things, I promise you.

The overthinking, the anxiety, all of that will go away.

You need to, be conscious of those thoughts too.

You need to combat and face it head on, be like,

no, I don't want to think like that.

I want to be positive.

I want to counteract those feelings of hopelessness

and worthlessness.

And remember,

if you don't do anything,

you're going to be in the exact same place

as you are a year from now.

So like, really internalize all the things I've said today

and you'll start building little by little, I promise you.

You’ll

get there, you’ll get to a better place,

and then once you're in a better place,

you’ll get to an even better place

and that's what I want for you.

I love you. Thank you so much for watching my video.

And yeah, I hope to see you in the next one.

You either win or you learn.

That is how you will never lose.

I believe in you. You can do this.