Şəbnəm Alməmmədova "Mənim xoşbəxtlik formulam" TEDxBakı

Summary

In this heartfelt TED talk, the speaker shares a deeply personal journey from depression to discovering the true meaning of happiness. Struggling with isolation in Sweden, they embark on a transformative journey across 30 countries, learning valuable life lessons about gratitude, belief, and living in the present. With poignant stories from Kenya, Bali, and Sweden, the speaker emphasizes the power of perspective and choice in finding happiness. The talk culminates in a tribute to their late mother, whose wisdom, 'If you want to be happy, then be,' inspired the speaker's journey to inner peace.

Takeaways

• 😀 The speaker struggled with depression during their time in Sweden, feeling isolated and disconnected from their new environment.
• 😀 Seeking help from various sources, including psychologists, pastors, and a mosque, the speaker realized that the only way to overcome their struggles was by helping themselves.
• 😀 The speaker embarked on a journey of self-discovery, traveling to over 30 countries in search of happiness and deeper meaning.
• 😀 The first lesson learned was that happiness begins with gratitude, exemplified by a conversation with a villager in Kenya who taught the value of appreciating what you already have.
• 😀 In Bali, the speaker learned the importance of believing in oneself and in a higher power, with an emphasis on spirituality as a foundation for happiness.
• 😀 The speaker learned that a life built on belief is resilient and stable, similar to a stone house that can withstand storms, unlike a sand castle that crumbles.
• 😀 The third lesson came from a professor in Sweden who faced terminal illness but emphasized the importance of living fully in the present, enjoying each moment without focusing on the inevitable future.
• 😀 The speaker realized that happiness is ultimately a choice: you can choose to see the good or the bad in any situation.
• 😀 The speaker's mother always reminded them that happiness is a matter of choice: 'If you want to be happy, then be.'
• 😀 The speaker dedicated their speech and future achievements to their mother, who passed away after heart surgery, fulfilling her dream of seeing them speak at a TED event.

Q & A

What led the speaker to feel depressed when moving to Sweden?

The speaker faced challenges adjusting to Sweden, including the cold weather, lack of warmth from people, and the dark winter days, which contributed to their depression. They felt disconnected and struggled with loneliness in the new environment.

What steps did the speaker take to address their depression?

The speaker sought help from multiple sources: a psychologist, a pastor, a mosque, and a professor. However, none of these provided a lasting solution. Eventually, the speaker realized that the key to overcoming their depression lay within themselves.

How did the speaker come to the realization that no one could help them but themselves?

After receiving various forms of advice and support, the speaker realized that the ultimate responsibility for their happiness rested on their own shoulders. This led them to the decision to travel as a way to cope with their feelings and explore happiness.

What was the first lesson the speaker learned in Kenya regarding happiness?

In Kenya, the speaker learned the importance of gratitude as a formula for happiness. By appreciating what we already have, rather than focusing on what we lack, we can experience true happiness.

How did the speaker describe the encounter with Louis in Kenya?

Louis, a local from a village in Kenya, showed the speaker a profound perspective on happiness. Despite his poverty, he considered himself a 'millionaire' because he valued his health and body. This encounter taught the speaker that happiness comes from appreciating what we have rather than seeking external possessions.

What did the speaker learn in Bali about belief and happiness?

In Bali, the speaker discovered that belief is central to happiness. A wise man named Ketut explained that happiness comes from believing in oneself, others, and a higher power. This belief provides a foundation for resilience and happiness, even in difficult times.

What is the significance of belief in the context of happiness, as explained by Ketut in Bali?

Ketut compared a life built on belief to a stone house, sturdy and resilient in the face of life's challenges, while a life built on disbelief is like a sand castle, vulnerable to destruction. Belief in something greater provides stability and joy, even in adversity.

How did the speaker's professor in Sweden influence their understanding of happiness?

The professor, Thomas, taught the speaker the importance of living in the present moment. Despite his cancer diagnosis, Thomas focused on enjoying life in the here and now, emphasizing that happiness comes from fully experiencing each moment rather than worrying about the future.

What was the speaker's mother's philosophy on happiness?

The speaker's mother believed that happiness is a choice. She would often say, 'If you want to be happy, then be.' This simple yet profound wisdom helped guide the speaker through their personal struggles and discoveries about happiness.

How did the speaker cope with the loss of their mother, and what was their final realization about happiness?

After the death of their mother, the speaker struggled with grief but ultimately embraced the wisdom of their mother's philosophy: that happiness is a matter of choice. The speaker learned to focus on the positive and choose happiness, even in the face of loss.