Can Curiosity Heal Division? | Scott Shigeoka | TED

Summary

In this powerful narrative, the speaker reflects on personal struggles with auditory hallucinations and the transformative power of curiosity. Guided by a therapist’s advice, they learn to embrace the voices as reflections of past trauma and a call for healing. Their road trip across the country, engaging with people from different walks of life, emphasizes the importance of curiosity in bridging divides. The speaker highlights how curiosity can foster deeper connections and help overcome biases, ultimately suggesting that practicing curiosity is key to loving others more fully, even those with opposing beliefs.

Takeaways

• 😀 The speaker experienced auditory hallucinations in 2017, which initially were negative and caused self-doubt.
• 😀 A therapist suggested getting curious about the voices, leading the speaker to discover that the voices mirrored their past experiences of shame and bullying.
• 😀 Through curiosity, the speaker learned that the voices were not negative forces, but reflections of unmet emotional needs from their past, pointing to a younger self in need of attention and healing.
• 😀 The speaker works at UC Berkeley's Greater Good Science Center, studying social division and ways to bridge differences, especially through curiosity and empathy.
• 😀 The speaker embarked on a year-long road trip across the U.S., engaging with people with different political and social views, including attending Trump rallies and living with religious communities.
• 😀 By approaching these encounters with curiosity, the speaker aimed to foster understanding rather than cancel or 'other' people with opposing views.
• 😀 Psychological research supports the idea that encountering people who are different reduces feelings of threat and promotes connection.
• 😀 A key story involves a millennial named Sarah who, through conversations with Catholic sisters, learned a deeper, more compassionate understanding of the vow of chastity, realizing it was about 'deprivatizing love.'
• 😀 The speaker attended a Trump rally in Minnesota, where genuine conversations led to shared stories and a softened view of people who initially seemed very different.
• 😀 Through these interactions, the speaker realized that while political views may not change, the process of connecting and interrupting biases fosters empathy and shared humanity.
• 😀 The speaker believes that curiosity is a powerful tool for love, not just intellectual understanding. It allows us to deeply engage with others, especially those who seem different, and to love them better by seeking to understand their full humanity.

Q & A

What role did curiosity play in the speaker's journey toward healing from auditory hallucinations?

Curiosity allowed the speaker to confront and understand the negative voices they were hearing, transforming them from sources of fear and shame into an opportunity for self-healing. By exploring the messages from the voices, the speaker uncovered deeper truths about their past and inner emotional struggles.

How did the speaker's therapist influence their approach to dealing with the auditory hallucinations?

The therapist encouraged the speaker to get curious about the voices, asking them to listen rather than ignore or push away the negative thoughts. This advice was pivotal in the speaker’s process of self-discovery and healing.

What was the deeper realization the speaker had about the voices they were hearing?

The speaker realized that the voices were not external forces, but reflections of past experiences and emotional wounds, particularly related to shame and bullying. These voices pointed to a younger, wounded part of the speaker that needed healing and attention.

What was the significance of the speaker’s road trip across the United States?

The road trip allowed the speaker to engage directly with people whose beliefs and identities were different from their own, aiming to foster connection and understanding. The journey emphasized the importance of curiosity in overcoming divisions and finding common ground.

How did the speaker's experiences at the Trump rally challenge their initial perceptions of 'Trump voters'?

At the Trump rally, the speaker engaged with people personally and found commonalities through shared human experiences, like grief and family stories. This helped humanize the individuals they once viewed solely through the lens of political difference, breaking down stereotypes.

What lesson did the speaker learn from their interaction with Catholic sisters and the Nuns and Nones group?

The speaker learned that by engaging with different perspectives, like those of the Catholic sisters, they could expand their understanding of concepts such as love and commitment. Through curiosity, the speaker was able to redefine their views on chastity and its potential for nontraditional expressions of love.

How does the concept of 'curiosity' serve as a tool for overcoming societal divisions?

Curiosity allows individuals to look beyond surface-level differences and stereotypes, enabling genuine conversations that reveal shared humanity. This can interrupt biases, challenge prejudices, and foster deeper connections across political, social, and cultural divides.

In the context of the speaker’s journey, what does it mean to 'love better'?

'Loving better' means practicing curiosity in relationships—seeking to understand others fully, with empathy and openness, rather than trying to change or judge them. This curiosity-based love nurtures genuine connection and helps bridge divides.

What does the speaker suggest as a solution to the increasing divisions in society?

The speaker suggests that fostering curiosity is crucial to overcoming societal divisions. By prioritizing curiosity over certainty and actively seeking to understand others, individuals can build connections and address conflicts with empathy rather than judgment.

How does the speaker propose we can practice curiosity in our daily lives?

The speaker advocates for approaching others with genuine interest, asking open-ended questions, and listening with the intent to understand—not to change or judge. This can be applied to interactions with family, colleagues, or anyone holding differing beliefs or perspectives.