A Simple Game To Never Run Out Of Things To Say In Conversation

Summary

The video script offers five tips to avoid awkward silences and maintain engaging conversations. First, use the 'Reminds Me of' technique to connect with the environment and share related stories. Second, ask open-ended questions to encourage the other person to elaborate and keep the conversation flowing. Third, employ revival questions to reignite stalled conversations, such as inquiring how a group knows each other or asking a person for their story. Fourth, make a complimentary cold read to initiate a dialogue about the person's positive traits or interests. Lastly, embrace silence and allow the other person to lead the conversation, using mirroring techniques to encourage them to elaborate. The script also promotes an online course, Charisma University, for further strategies on becoming an expert conversationalist.

Takeaways

• 🔄 Use 'Reminds Me of' to spark new conversational threads when your mind goes blank.
• 🗨️ Ask open-ended questions to encourage the other person to share more about themselves.
• 👶 Remember the power of 'why' to delve deeper into someone's motivations and experiences.
• 🚑 Use revival questions to rekindle a stalled conversation, such as 'How do you guys all know one another?'
• 📈 Ask about exciting future plans to keep the conversation fresh and engaging with acquaintances.
• 🌟 Make a complimentary cold read to initiate a discussion based on observations about the person.
• 🤫 Embrace silence and allow the other person to lead the conversation, using mirroring to encourage them.
• 🧠 Understand that finding common ground through related stories can help build connections.
• 🚫 Avoid making your story superior to others' to prevent coming off as one-upping.
• 💡 Every conversation is an opportunity to learn more about the other person and build a deeper connection.
• 📚 Consider further learning through resources like 'Charisma University' for advanced conversational skills.

Q & A

What is the first tip given to avoid awkward silence in a conversation?

The first tip is to play 'Reminds Me of', where you use something in the environment to start a new conversation by saying, 'You know, that reminds me of...' and then filling in the blank.

Why should you avoid making your story superior to someone else's during a conversation?

You should avoid this because people are drawn to others who they feel are similar to themselves, and making your story superior can come across as one-upping, which can be off-putting.

What is the purpose of asking open-ended questions in a conversation?

Open-ended questions are meant to encourage the other person to talk more about their experiences and thoughts, which can lead to a more engaging and less awkward conversation.

What is a revival question and how can it be used to restart a stalled conversation?

A revival question is a non-sequitur that brings a conversation back to life when it stalls. It can be used by asking something like 'How do you guys all know one another?' or 'So what's your story?' to prompt the other person to share more about themselves.

Why is asking about someone's exciting plans for the future a good conversational tactic?

Asking about future plans is a good tactic because it is endlessly renewable and can help in connecting with people, especially in a workplace or social setting, by showing interest in their aspirations.

What is a complimentary cold read and how can it help in a conversation?

A complimentary cold read is a positive assumption about someone's personality or interests based on their appearance or behavior. It can help in a conversation by either being correct and prompting the person to share more, or by sparking a discussion about why you made that assumption.

What is the fifth and final tip for ensuring you never run out of things to say in a conversation?

The fifth tip is to flip the script so that you're not the one worrying about running out of things to say. This involves getting comfortable with silence and allowing the other person to move the conversation forward, possibly by repeating back the last few words they said to encourage them to elaborate.

Why is it important to ask 'why' questions in a conversation?

Asking 'why' questions is important because it helps to delve deeper into a person's motivations and experiences, which can lead to a more meaningful and engaging conversation.

How can repeating back the last few words someone said encourage them to continue speaking?

Repeating back the last few words someone said is a form of mirroring that shows you were listening and are interested in what they have to say. It invites them to elaborate on their previous statement.

What is the name of the online course mentioned in the script that offers strategies to become an expert conversationalist?

The online course mentioned is called Charisma University.

What are some sections covered in the Charisma University course?

The Charisma University course covers sections on creating amazing first impressions, telling captivating stories, developing rock-solid confidence, and becoming an inspiring leader.

What action is suggested for viewers interested in learning more about the Charisma University course?

Viewers interested in the Charisma University course are encouraged to click the button provided in the video to learn more and join the course.

Outlines

00:00

🗣️ Overcoming Awkward Silences in Conversations

This paragraph discusses the common problem of awkward silences during conversations and offers five tips to avoid running out of things to say. The first tip is to use the 'Reminds Me of' technique, which involves relating the current situation to something in the environment to open new conversational threads. The second tip is to ask open-ended questions to encourage the other person to share more about themselves. The third tip is to use revival questions to reignite a stalled conversation. The fourth tip is to make a complimentary cold read to initiate a discussion based on observations about the person. The final tip is to become comfortable with silence and allow the other person to lead the conversation, using mirroring techniques to encourage them to elaborate.

Keywords

💡awkward silence

Awkward silence refers to a moment in a conversation when there is an uncomfortable pause, often because no one knows what to say next. In the video, it is presented as a common social challenge that people face. The script offers strategies to overcome this issue, such as using the 'Reminds Me of' technique to spark new topics of conversation.

💡Reminds Me of

'Reminds Me of' is a conversational technique suggested in the video to help individuals overcome the challenge of an awkward silence. It involves using something in the environment as a prompt to share a related story or thought, thereby opening up new lines of discussion. For example, if someone is wearing a unique piece of jewelry, you might say, 'You know, that reminds me of a trip I took to a similar place.'

💡open-ended questions

Open-ended questions are inquiries that cannot be answered with a simple 'yes' or 'no' and encourage the person to elaborate. The video emphasizes the importance of asking such questions to keep a conversation flowing. For instance, instead of asking if someone likes Toronto, the video suggests asking how they like it, which invites a more detailed response.

💡revival questions

Revival questions are used to re-energize a conversation that has stalled. The video provides examples such as 'How do you guys all know one another?' and 'So what's your story?' These questions are designed to be broad and provoke storytelling, thereby reigniting the conversation.

💡complimentary cold read

A complimentary cold read is a positive, speculative statement about someone's character or interests based on their appearance or behavior. It's a way to initiate conversation by making an educated guess and then inviting the person to correct or expand upon it. For example, the video suggests saying to a smiley person, 'You look like the type who would be great with kids,' which can lead to further discussion.

💡mirroring

Mirroring is a communication technique where one person echoes or reflects the last few words or phrases spoken by another to encourage them to continue talking. The video suggests using this method to invite the other person to elaborate on their thoughts, which can lead to deeper insights and a more engaging conversation.

💡first impressions

First impressions refer to the initial judgments people make about others within the first moments of meeting. The video mentions that creating amazing first impressions is a separate section in the online course 'Charisma University,' implying that it is a critical skill for effective communication and building rapport.

💡captivating stories

Captivating stories are narratives that are engaging and hold the listener's attention. The video suggests that the ability to tell such stories is a key component of being a good conversationalist, as it can make interactions more interesting and memorable.

💡confidence

Confidence is a belief in one's abilities and is highlighted in the video as an essential quality for effective communication. It is mentioned in the context of the online course 'Charisma University,' where developing rock-solid confidence is a topic, suggesting that being self-assured can improve one's interaction with others.

💡leadership

Leadership is the ability to guide and influence others, which the video implies is a skill that can be developed through the strategies and techniques taught in the online course. Becoming an inspiring leader is presented as a goal that can enhance one's ability to connect with and motivate others in various social and professional settings.

💡Charisma University

Charisma University is an online course created by the speaker that aims to teach individuals how to become expert conversationalists. The video mentions it as a resource for those who wish to learn advanced tips on conversation skills, first impressions, storytelling, confidence, and leadership.

Highlights

Dealing with awkward silence can be challenging, but there are strategies to keep the conversation flowing.

Use the 'Reminds Me of' technique to connect the environment to a new topic of conversation.

Sharing related stories can help build rapport with others by finding common ground.

Avoid making your story superior to others to prevent a negative impression.

Ask open-ended questions to encourage the other person to elaborate and continue the conversation.

Using 'why' questions can help to dig deeper into someone's motivations and experiences.

Revival questions can reignite a stalled conversation by bringing up unexpected topics.

Inquire how people in a group know each other to uncover shared stories or connections.

Asking 'So what's your story?' can provide an open-ended opportunity for the other person to guide the conversation.

Discussing exciting future plans can be a renewable topic for maintaining ongoing conversations.

Make a complimentary cold read to initiate a conversation based on observations about the person.

Even if the cold read is incorrect, it can still serve as a conversation starter.

Embrace silence and allow the other person to lead the conversation to reduce pressure on yourself.

Mirroring the last few words of the other person can encourage them to elaborate and continue talking.

Learning to become an expert conversationalist can be enhanced through specialized courses like Charisma University.

Charisma University offers strategies for creating first impressions, telling stories, and developing confidence.

Subscribing to the channel and clicking the notification bell ensures viewers stay updated with new content.

Transcripts

We've all been there before — you're in conversation, things are humming along nicely,

and then out of nowhere, the awkward silence rears its head.

At that moment, your mind goes completely blank,

you don't know what to say, and you can sense the other person's eyes wandering

as they look for someone else to talk to.

That scenario sucks so here are five tips

to make sure that you never run out of things to say in conversation again.

First, when you find yourself in that situation where your mind has gone blank, play Reminds Me of.

That just means that you look to the environment around you and say,

"You know, that reminds me of..." and then fill in the blank.

It's great for opening new conversational threads

and it can also work as a follow-up when someone finishes telling a story

which is how many groups of friends interact all the time.

That's because people are drawn to others who they feel are similar to themselves and related stories can build that bridge —

just be sure NOT to repeatedly make your story superior to theirs or else you can feel like one-upping.

Second, when you ask questions, keep them open-ended as often as possible.

So rather than saying, "Oh, you're from Toronto. Do you like it there?"

you might say, "How do you like Toronto? I'm curious to hear more about it."

The former question invites a one-word response and then awkward silence.

The latter gets the other person talking about the things that they like

which is going to open up more conversational threads.

Also, just remember the rule that every three-year-old knows about conversation

which is that simply asking why is a great way to get people to open up more.

So when someone mentions that they are consultant for instance, you might ask,

"Why did you decide to get into consulting?"

To be clear, unlike three-year-olds, you don't have to say the word 'why' over and over and over.

But drilling down into their motivations will often get you a deeper connection in conversation.

Third, for the worst case scenario when conversation just flat-out stalls, use revival questions —

these are non sequiturs that bring conversation back from the dead.

Here's three of my favorites — if you're in a new group and conversation dies

after initial pleasantries, a great revival question is, "How do you guys all know one another?"

There's almost always some kind of story that conversation can build from.

If you're only speaking to one person, you can say instead, "So what's your story?"

The great thing about this question is that it is so open-ended that the other person

will probably guide you towards the topics that they want to talk about

usually responding with something like, "You mean what do I do for work or what do I like to do for fun?"

Their tone of voice and enthusiasm will usually tell you the best angle of conversation to continue with.

Lastly, for people you already know well, ask them about their exciting plans for the future.

This one is nice because it is endlessly renewable

which makes it great for connecting with people in the office or wherever you work.

Fourth on the list is to make a complimentary cold read.

So if someone is particularly smiley, you might say, "You look like the type who would be great with kids."

Or if they're super strong, you might say, "You look like you're pretty into fitness."

If you get it right, they're probably going to open up and tell you more about it

but even if you're wrong, you can talk about what it is that gave you that impression in the first place.

Either way, you've got new conversational material to work with.

And the fifth and final tip is to flip the script so that you're not the one worried about running out of things to say.

Instead, allow the other person to move the conversation forward by getting more comfortable with silence.

Seriously, thirty seconds might feel like a long time

but if you can just take a deep breath while maintaining easy eye contact,

more often than not, the other person will make a comment or ask you a question.

Or if you really want to encourage them to continue, repeat back the last few words that they said.

This mirroring invites them to elaborate and can often get people to open up in very powerful ways.

So there you have it — five quick and easy tactics that you can use today

to make sure that you never run out of things to say in conversation.

If you'd like these tips and want more advanced tips, you might want to check out an online course that I created called Charisma University.

It has a full hour of my best strategies to become an expert conversationalist

not to mention separate sections on creating amazing first impressions,

telling captivating stories, developing rock-solid confidence,

and becoming an inspiring leader.

You can learn more and join today if you're interested by clicking the button now.

If you like this video and more like it on YouTube, make sure to subscribe to the channel

and click that notification bell.

I hope that you enjoyed this video and I will see you in the next one.