Give it a shot! You won’t regret it! | Rida Tharana | TEDxYouth@NPSKRM

TEDx Talks
9 Sept 202216:18

Summary

TLDRRadha Tarana shares her inspiring journey of overcoming societal norms and personal challenges to pursue her dreams. From being one of the first girls in her village to attend a convent school, to becoming financially independent, she emphasizes the importance of self-belief and following one's passion. Her story highlights the struggles women still face in rural areas, the need to challenge gender stereotypes, and the significance of manifesting dreams with hard work and confidence. Radha encourages her audience to take control of their lives, experiment, and push beyond societal expectations.

Takeaways

  • 🌱 The concept of 'reaching beyond' is subjective and personal for everyone, ranging from small goals like getting enough sleep to larger dreams like financial independence and following one's passions.
  • 🎓 Radha Tarana shared her background of coming from a small village in Coorg and being one of the first girls to attend a convent school, emphasizing the importance of education and independence.
  • 👩‍🔬 Despite societal expectations, she pursued a career in biotech and genetics, which was her way of escaping a traditional life path and breaking gender norms.
  • 💸 Radha faced financial difficulties, convincing her parents to let her study by taking a student loan, which she learned to repay through her work, despite not being taught about loans and interest in school.
  • 🎤 Radha started working as an MC (event host) at 17 to support herself, gradually improving despite initial struggles, which taught her persistence and resilience.
  • 💪 She overcame gender biases in the industry, emphasizing how important it is to push beyond societal limitations, especially for women, and to follow one’s passion.
  • 📈 Through her work and social media content, she unintentionally went viral, amassing thousands of followers by sharing her thoughts on gender roles, societal pressures, and self-worth.
  • 💼 Radha realized that a 9-to-5 job wasn’t for her, as it drained her creativity and happiness, prompting her to explore her true passions in life.
  • 💬 She encourages everyone to take control of their lives, to stop giving others the power to validate them, and to focus on self-confidence, self-love, and personal growth.
  • ✨ Radha's story is about persistence, self-belief, and not allowing societal norms or external opinions to dictate one’s path, encouraging the audience to dream big and work hard.

Q & A

  • What is the main topic of Radha Tarana's speech?

    -The main topic of Radha Tarana's speech is 'Reaching Beyond,' which she interprets as pursuing dreams beyond societal expectations and limitations, and following one's passion regardless of conventional norms.

  • How does Radha define 'Reaching Beyond' for different individuals?

    -Radha explains that 'Reaching Beyond' is subjective and varies for each individual, whether it's achieving financial independence, completing education, or pursuing personal dreams like starting a business or following a creative passion.

  • What challenges did Radha face while pursuing her education?

    -Radha faced financial challenges, a lack of support from her father later in life, and societal expectations for women to marry young instead of pursuing higher education. She had to take a loan to study and worked as an event host to support herself and her family.

  • How did Radha get into event hosting?

    -Radha got into event hosting out of financial necessity while she was studying. She initially struggled with public speaking but kept practicing until she became successful, earning more money than her previous job as a promoter.

  • What societal issues does Radha address in her speech?

    -Radha discusses gender inequality, the societal expectations placed on women, and the privilege that some have while many women still struggle for basic education and rights, especially in rural areas.

  • What advice does Radha give about self-confidence?

    -Radha advises that individuals should believe in themselves, not seek validation from others, and not let others' opinions define their self-worth. She emphasizes the importance of taking control of one's own life and decisions.

  • What was Radha's experience working in a 9-to-5 job?

    -Radha worked a 9-to-5 corporate job but found it draining and unfulfilling. She realized that such a job was not suited to her personality and creativity, which led her to focus on her passion for event hosting and content creation.

  • How did Radha become a content creator?

    -Radha started posting videos expressing her opinions on societal issues and personal experiences, not intending to become a content creator. However, some of her videos went viral, and she gained a large following, which eventually led her to monetize her content.

  • What does Radha say about failure and success?

    -Radha emphasizes that failure is an important part of learning and growth. She encourages people to take risks, try new things, and view failure as a valuable experience that leads to improvement and eventual success.

  • What message does Radha want to leave with the audience about achieving dreams?

    -Radha's message is to dream big, pursue passions, and not let societal norms or other people dictate one's path. She believes in manifesting success through hard work and self-belief, and she encourages others to take control of their energy and environment to reach their goals.

Outlines

00:00

🎤 Introduction and Reaching Beyond

The speaker, Radha Tarana, introduces herself and reflects on the concept of 'reaching beyond.' She humorously engages the audience, encouraging them to think about what 'reaching beyond' means to them. For some, it could be achieving personal goals like settling down or becoming financially independent. She briefly mentions her own journey, coming from a small village in Coorg and attending a convent school, emphasizing how personal growth and ambition can lead to new possibilities.

05:02

📚 Education Struggles and Breaking Norms

Radha shares her story of overcoming societal norms and financial challenges to pursue education. She highlights the gender-based disparity in how sons and daughters are treated regarding education and opportunities. Despite financial hardships, Radha took out a loan to study in Bangalore, which marked a pivotal moment in her life. She reflects on how schools often fail to teach practical life skills, like understanding bank loans and interest rates, which she learned through her own experiences.

10:02

🎤 First Steps into Public Speaking

Radha recalls her initial foray into emceeing (MCing) and the hurdles she faced. Despite lacking public speaking skills and facing gender biases, she persisted through multiple failed attempts to improve. She started by working as a promoter earning a modest amount and then transitioned to MCing, which paid more and helped her support herself financially. She discusses the importance of perseverance and not giving up, even when success seems elusive.

15:04

🎬 Escaping 9-to-5 and Finding Her Voice

Radha reflects on her brief experience in a corporate job, which made her realize that the 9-to-5 lifestyle was not for her. She felt drained and stifled, leading her to start recording and sharing her thoughts on societal issues, especially those related to gender roles. One of her videos unexpectedly went viral, leading to a rapid increase in her social media following. She explains how this newfound platform allowed her to voice her opinions on topics like body shaming and societal expectations of women.

📈 Growth, Gratitude, and Reaching Beyond

Radha concludes by emphasizing the importance of self-love, gratitude, and manifesting one's dreams. She reflects on how her journey is just beginning and encourages the audience to believe in themselves, dream big, and never let others dictate their self-worth. She encourages experimentation and taking risks, emphasizing that failure is part of growth. Her final message focuses on taking control of one's energy and surroundings to create a fulfilling life.

Mindmap

Keywords

💡Reaching Beyond

Reaching beyond refers to pushing past personal, societal, and conventional boundaries to achieve more than what is expected or what feels comfortable. In the video, the speaker emphasizes that reaching beyond can mean different things to different people—whether it is pursuing education, financial independence, or personal dreams like owning a house by the beach. This concept ties into the core theme of self-empowerment and breaking out of limitations.

💡Manifestation

Manifestation involves envisioning and actively working toward achieving one's goals and desires. The speaker recounts how she envisioned moments, like giving her autograph, long before they became a reality. This idea of manifesting one’s aspirations is a key part of her personal philosophy, suggesting that visualization and determination are powerful tools for success.

💡Financial Independence

Financial independence is the ability to support oneself without relying on others, especially family. The speaker emphasizes its importance as part of reaching beyond traditional societal roles, sharing her journey of taking a student loan and working multiple jobs to pay for her education and support her family. Achieving financial independence, especially as a woman, is portrayed as a significant milestone in her personal journey.

💡Gender Roles

Gender roles refer to societal expectations placed on individuals based on their gender. The speaker discusses the different expectations for men and women, such as the pressure for women to marry early or the unequal investment in education between sons and daughters. She challenges these norms by advocating for women to break free from traditional roles and pursue their own dreams.

💡Societal Norms

Societal norms are the unwritten rules and expectations that govern behavior in a community or society. The speaker highlights how these norms dictate life paths, such as following prescribed career choices or getting married at a young age. She encourages others to break away from these norms and follow their own passions, as they no longer have to conform to what society traditionally expects.

💡Self-belief

Self-belief is the confidence in one’s abilities and worth, even in the face of external doubts or criticisms. The speaker stresses that self-belief is essential for success, especially when others may doubt one’s potential. She shares how believing in herself allowed her to overcome failures, continue hosting events, and eventually achieve her goals.

💡Failure and Persistence

Failure and persistence refer to the process of encountering setbacks but continuing to strive for success. The speaker recounts how she failed multiple times when starting out as an event host, yet refused to give up. Her persistence illustrates the message that success often requires enduring failures and learning from them.

💡Education

Education in this context refers to both formal schooling and the broader process of learning about the world, especially in non-traditional ways. The speaker shares her journey of pursuing education despite societal and financial obstacles, using it as a means to escape limiting conditions in her rural village. Her education allowed her to reach beyond what was expected of her, serving as a foundation for her independence.

💡Content Creation

Content creation is the act of producing and sharing material, often online, to engage an audience. The speaker became a content creator accidentally, starting by sharing her opinions on societal issues and women's rights. Her content resonated with others, leading to a significant online following. This aspect of her journey highlights how modern platforms allow individuals to amplify their voices and inspire change.

💡Social Change

Social change refers to shifts in societal attitudes, behaviors, and norms over time. The speaker advocates for social change, particularly in the treatment of women and the breaking of traditional gender roles. She wants to challenge the existing social structures that limit women’s opportunities, particularly in rural areas where many still struggle for basic education and equality.

Highlights

Radha Tarana introduces herself and the concept of 'Reaching Beyond,' emphasizing that it means different things to different people.

Radha shares her background, mentioning her upbringing in a small village in Coorg and being the first girl in her family sent to a convent school.

She highlights the importance of education and her father’s initial support in sending her to school, noting the cultural expectations she faced as a girl.

Radha reflects on societal pressures, particularly how education is often viewed as a tool for marriage invitations in rural areas.

She recounts her determination to pursue biotechnology and genetics, even though her family lacked the financial means.

Radha describes her struggles with student loans and how she was unprepared by her school education for financial realities like interest rates and banking.

Despite financial challenges, Radha began working as an MC to support her education and repay her loans, learning to navigate the events industry.

She shares her experiences of overcoming rejection and failure in her MC career, emphasizing persistence and resilience.

Radha discusses the sexism and gender biases she encountered in her professional journey, especially in industries like event hosting.

She reflects on the importance of self-gifting and self-love as ways to celebrate achievements and maintain a positive outlook.

Radha recounts how her opinions on societal issues, particularly regarding women, began to resonate with people and her unexpected rise as a content creator.

She expresses her surprise and anxiety when her social media following grew rapidly, reaching 100k followers by 2021.

Radha emphasizes the importance of believing in oneself and not giving others the power to dictate how one should feel or think.

She advises young people to experiment, embrace failure, and take risks in pursuing their goals.

Radha ends by stressing the importance of self-validation, taking control of one’s energy and environment, and not letting societal norms define personal success.

Transcripts

play00:00

[Music]

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hi everybody

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how many of y'all know me though

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raise your hands

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that's it

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we're gonna follow me after i mean

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you're all following me after we're done

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with this okay so my name is radha

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tarana um you've all got my introduction

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and the topic that was given to me was

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reach beyond uh so one of the things

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that i had in my head was

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what's what's reached me on exactly

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it's it's objective for sure some of you

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is like i just want to go back home and

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sleep

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that's reaching beyond for you some of

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them really want to have a settle life

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sit in a nice place have your own house

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at a beach that's reaching beyond some

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of you just finishing your education

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being financially independent some of

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you have stronger stories which can keep

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changing the aspect of reaching beyond

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so now here i'll just quickly talk about

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me

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where i come from what i do and how

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exactly did i reach me on right so i'm

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23 years old i come from coorg

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and i come from a very small village

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we

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were the first girls to be sent to a

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convent school luckily and we were also

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the first girls to be kind of sent forth

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and put forth to be like okay i really

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want my daughters to study and be

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financially independent so my father was

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really supportive

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then i don't know what happened now but

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he was then so we were the first girls

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to be sent to common schools and i was

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really good at my studies and but you're

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not really pushed you know the toppers

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are usually selected okay you're a

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topper so you're exceptionally good at

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everything you're average so i'm gonna

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push you a little more and if you are

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somebody who's just doing okay then you

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know what take a back seat but that's

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the best part you have so much more to

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offer

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than what you think you can do right not

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everyone's good at studies but you're

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good at so many more things that who the

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person who's good at studying might not

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be good at now this generation we're not

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just checking up to i want to be a

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doctor i want to be an engineer or have

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a settled financial status where i'm

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getting money on a regular basis but we

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follow passion someone's a dancer

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earning really well somebody's a content

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creator somebody's out there traveling

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and living their life somebody's out

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there with a business and entrepreneurs

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technologies and a lot more of stuff you

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know these small businesses that boom

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during covid we never thought something

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like that would be possible we never

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thought something like that could work

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and that's exactly what i will be

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discussing about or as to

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how you can be yourself and dream bigger

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and it should it doesn't really have to

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stick to what society has taught you or

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the societal norm of this is the

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dictionary i give you and if you follow

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this is when you are going to get live

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the so-called life that you're looking

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for

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so uh

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the idea was very simple i went to a

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convent school i was in class 10th we

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were all sitting together all my girls

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are together we're doing the signature

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i'm not sure if you do this okay so

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fanciest my father had the fanciest

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signature

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still copied i'd still copy it um every

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time i'd feel like okay i've scored

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something low like okay and i know how

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to sign so i just signed that but

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everyone sitting together they're like

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we need to come up with a nice signature

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is it cool we should really sit down and

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get a nice signature when they sat down

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they all had fancier signatures the s

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looked like a dragon and the r was

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flying up high and the fanciest a of all

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and now when it came to my name

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i just wrote my name it was r-i-d-a

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t-h-a-r-a-n they said

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your kids are gonna copy

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and i said okay just thinking of kids

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i'm sorry that was not in my head i was

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actually thinking that i'm going to be

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reaching at a position someday where

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somebody is going to come and say oh i

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think i need your autograph and when i

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write that

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i want them to know my name

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you guys i manifested that

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last year 2020 uh 2021 i was at a mall i

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was hosting a show and i remember this

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one person coming to me with a beautiful

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book that they genuinely love and they

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said i admire you i love what you make

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and there's so many things that has

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changed for me when they reach out to me

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they don't say oh you look pretty you're

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wearing a nice stress they say i was

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able to say no

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i could stand up and say i wanted to do

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this no i don't want to marry this early

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i want to be able to conquer this or

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conquer that that's not exactly the job

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i would want for my gender i want to

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experiment and explore and i gave my

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first signature it was my name it was

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nothing fancy it was just my name

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so as i kept going uh there were a lot

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of hurdles that came my way so then i

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planned i'm gonna take biotech and

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genetics because that was the only

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course that was not available in cool

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and the only way that i could get out of

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that place if it were not the case i'd

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be giving a ted with two of my kids

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right beside me

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so the deal was to get out of that place

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no matter what so um i took by i took

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science i was studying there in court

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still and then i somehow convinced my

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parents okay you know what i really have

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to go do this it's very good scope

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india is gonna be amazing genetics is

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what i'm gonna be i don't know how i

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convince my parents but i did convince

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them but they said we don't have the

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money for this though what are you gonna

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do about this i am not going to pay this

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because

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practically everyone there were engaged

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at the age of 16 and at the age of 18

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guys i'm 23 and this still

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happens so if you are at a place where

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this does not happen this is what i want

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to do open up your bubble and understand

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that most of the people still struggle

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to get their education and their

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education is basically uh just to be on

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an invitation of your wedding

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and not the dreams the amount of

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investment that you put on your sons is

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not the same that you would put on your

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daughter and that's what i want to

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change and that's what i want to go for

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and then i said okay i'll take the loan

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i'll take the loan and that's when i

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realized the schools didn't teach me

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about banks it didn't teach me about

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interest it didn't teach me about taxes

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it didn't teach me about the basics that

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i would require to be there i go on to

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the bank i say i want a student loan um

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they tell me about the interest 13

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13 is a nice number it's okay i guess

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who knows 13 percent would be acquired

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over a larger sum so i said it's cool i

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took uh three lakhs as the loan i

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convinced my parents i said you do not

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have to give me anything right i would

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sit down and pray to god you don't have

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to do any just send me to bangalore i'll

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figure it out i need to get out of this

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place no matter what so i moved out that

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was the only time my parents ever came

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to bangalore to drop me a hostel that

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was my dad and he's never never come to

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visit us after that

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i mean not that he doesn't want to he

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checks on me every time but he's like

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she'll take care of it so um

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that happened my parents were in a

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financial crunch it didn't really work

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out for them and that's when i got into

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emceeing i got into events i was 17 i

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desperately needed the money i needed 2

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000 rupees for my mess fee and i was

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okay with veg

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i went on started with working i i used

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to go to events i would see how they

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worked i would see mz speaking i was not

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good at speaking at all i would stutter

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i didn't know how to speak how to

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address a crowd what would i do do i

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look good enough and obviously we live

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in a sexist industry let's just not deny

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that you know that uh this role is

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particularly based with this gender this

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role might suit this gender and right

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now is when the diversity is coming into

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picture and the industry was the same as

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well we need tall pretty cute straight

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hair and all of that as the preference

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all the time now we didn't leave we're

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like no we're gonna go we'll try no

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matter what so the term we i use is i

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had a lot of people at that time aware

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of my support so i always like to

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address it as we and not i okay

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so we would just do it and um i started

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hosting my first event didn't go well

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second bad third stuttering structuring

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all the way along fourth

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fifth no now imagine as a normal person

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would i not give up at three third third

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try i'd be like this is not my cup of

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tea fifth yes but no i did not because i

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was earning 800 as a promoter but i was

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earning 2000 as an mc which would lead

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me to i could just get my mess fee paid

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and i would be able to invest my time on

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my records and my studies as every every

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other students did that they had pocket

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monies coming in they would go to really

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fancy restaurants you're living in

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bangalore come on for those three years

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every saturday sunday i'd be at a mall

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or at a corporate show hosting an event

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making sure that i'm getting enough

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money coming through midway i stopped

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taking the loan so i stopped taking at

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two lakhs i started paying back i

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started taking care of my sister's

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education because the financial crunch

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was still low and i didn't want them to

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miss out on that still telling you guys

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this is so important

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so they got their education they were

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studying they're really smart girls very

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beautiful um and after that i just

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decided okay i'm gonna start paying the

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loan i'm someone who cannot take money

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from anybody and if i do i have to

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return that back and the same thing with

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the bank as well bank was scared too

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every month i would call up so i've

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added the money in the account please

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take it they wouldn't take it

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they'd be like why are you not taking

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the money i've put it in finally instead

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of two lags i had to pay three likes

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because that's when the interest thing

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came in and i learned that okay this is

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how much i have to pay but i cleared my

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loan

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2021 jan entirely but in the meantime we

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had

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panda make that hit

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yes

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i was also the first person to actually

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complete that loan they don't give it to

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anybody apparently they're like they all

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come and say we'll kill ourselves if we

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cannot pay right now but anyway so

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pandemic happened and the event industry

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shut down the reason i am here is

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because i have the audience it's the

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same thing that goes with the event

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industry as well the only way it can

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perform is when we have the audience but

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the entire lockdown it shifted to

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virtual events and i slowly went into

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corporates when i went into a corporate

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event or when i went to yes i was

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working for

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concentrics for six months i realized

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nine to five is not my job it it

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it made me feel sad i wasn't happy i'm

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i'm happy to go i'm a happy-go-lucky

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girl i just

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should everything might go down in the

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drain but i still somehow find to be

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happy it's okay it happens we get out of

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it there's a new day to look after and

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there's a new thing to do so let's just

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not go for it

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but that those six months were terrible

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i just realized nine to five is not my

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cup of tea it just shunned my

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capabilities it shunned what i could do

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what i believed in how i could achieve

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things i was just so drained i didn't

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have the time for anything so what i

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would do i would just get ready my cab

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was waiting for me and i just had

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opinions about certain things you know

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about society on skin color skinny

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people fat shaming people

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opinions on when you have to get married

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when you have to have kids everything

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and and basically i thought it was

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targeted only towards women

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no matter how much you say we've

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progressed but we don't look into the

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rural areas of how women still fight to

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get the basic needs we're still

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privileged here

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so i was talking about that

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i didn't have the time for it and i'd

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gifted myself an iphone essie at that

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time as a birthday gift and i'm a

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self-gifting woman every time i do come

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up with an achievement or i want

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something i give myself something

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everything that i'm wearing is a gift

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for myself i believe in a big time so i

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was just there so i still hold my phone

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quickly record because the cab driver

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would call me 100 times and just post it

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so my idea was not to be a content

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creator my idea was to just

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escape from whatever i was going through

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and and just share my opinions of what i

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thought about the system or what i

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thought about

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women and how they could change

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and one of the reasons just went viral

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now it's this notifications popping up

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now and then and i'm just like what is

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happening i just don't know why is all

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of this happening

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i have anxiety i still have anxiety i

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have anxiety and i don't touch my phone

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for a week straight i was at 3000 then

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um and then drastically these numbers

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are just changing people are just

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following me just does not make sense

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and it's very confusing

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finally i'm just talking to somebody and

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i say it's 20 20 november i say by the

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by the time we hit 2021 i hope i'm able

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to make it to 4k that's 4k followers

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it's a big number i was from 3k to 4k we

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hit 20k

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and on 2021 jan i hit 100k

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apparently a lot of real started going

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viral and then slowly i didn't still

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know how to monetize out of it but i

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slowly i just i just was like okay

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people are actually hearing me out my

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opinions does matter and i started

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taking up issues again as i told you i'm

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very these are all my experiences that

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i've been through my entire life let

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that be about just facing a normal thing

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i always keep telling um a man stands up

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and and makes a decision you'd be like

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that is a true leader did you see

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he knows exactly what he's doing a woman

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does the same thing the same decision

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this is exactly why women shouldn't be

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there did you see that the face that she

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made right it didn't seem pleasant and

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that's the narrative we have to change

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there is there's a subjective role

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that's given to each gender you look

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good at this you look good at that this

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is a sustainable job for you where

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you're able to also help your family and

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your friends but what about your dreams

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but what about what you want to do what

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about what you want to say or what about

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your

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vicious and and will what about what you

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like and that's exactly what how you

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take control of it we live in a society

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which is really hard you just cannot say

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no to your parents if we are financially

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dependent on them but one of the things

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i would want to

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just just make sure that you're forced

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upon is

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believe in yourself when you think you

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can't do this or you're just not good at

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it is the time you need to believe in

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yourself the most the way you look at

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yourself is the way the world will look

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at you you can't change people's

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opinions i'm pretty sure 50 percent of

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you might not agree with what i say or

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might not like me but that does not

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change what i think about myself do i i

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come off as a very strong confident

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woman i know exactly what i get to the

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table and that will never change

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so your perspective about me might

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change or might not change but it will

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never affect what i think about myself

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and that's how you gain confidence i

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couldn't come here and stand up and

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speak but the main difference what we

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have is we give this power of what we

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should think of ourselves to people

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around us you like you will validate me

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you will decide how i should think how i

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should feel what will make me look

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pretty and what should no no that's the

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decision made for you it's your life

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it's your hair it's your body how you

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feel about yourself is what matters are

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you feeling healthy are you feeling

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pretty are you feeling confident is up

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to you but the minute you give that

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power to somebody is when you know it's

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not going the way you want and that's

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the power you should take away from

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everyone to young girls to young boys

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out here all i would say is

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this is the time for you to experiment

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go on

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get that show

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get that gig whatever that you're

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looking for try it out you fail good for

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you you have an experience you learn

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from it you go for it this is the time

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you do not lose opportunities we are the

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generation that will feed on to it we

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are not someone who's gonna be like

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let's just let it go we want it we get

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it i keep telling this radar wants it

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gets it

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in a nice way i'm not gonna hurt anybody

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but in a nice way but it's also the fact

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that i manifested everything that i have

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here i worked my ass off to be there i'm

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so sorry for the language but i worked

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really hard to be here one of the things

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that i realized is

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you know with constant

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gratification gratitude uh constant

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self-love towards yourself to people

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around you you just change the persona

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of how you see the world once you're

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full with love within yourself right you

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just see exactly that with every other

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person around

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and that's all you have to do

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so reaching beyond as i told you is

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subjective

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it keeps changing for each one of you

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and i hope one day you all have your

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reach beyond stories but this is my

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reach beyond story we're just starting

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we're just beginning maybe soon enough

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you'll see me somewhere else and be like

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i know her she came to my school and she

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gave the speech which i didn't

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understand then but she's here now

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as i told you it's it's dreaming big

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don't don't hold up and say

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when people go on no that's not possible

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let it go it's that's not something you

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can do don't

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never let that go for it the minute as i

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told you you give it to somebody

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your energy is trained decide your

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energy decide your space decide the kind

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of people you want to be with the kind

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of energy and the environment you want

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to grow around and that's what will

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change

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with this i would like to end but

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sayonara this is

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signing off thank you

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Related Tags
self-beliefresiliencesocietal normswomen empowermentfinancial independencebreaking barriersrural challengespersonal growtheducationmotivation