A-Y-Awesomeness Ep19 *HOW TO HARMONIZE W/ DIFFERENT LIFESTYLES OF FRIENDS & FAMILY*

Summary

Dr. Edith Ubuntu Chan, a holistic high-performance coach and Chinese medicine doctor, discusses the challenges of making lifestyle changes, especially when facing family resistance. She emphasizes the importance of finding supportive communities and being patient with loved ones' concerns. Dr. Chan suggests responding to family with love and sharing lifestyle changes subtly when they express interest, rather than preaching. She encourages creating a harmonious environment by focusing on common interests and using positive reinforcement to inspire family members.

Takeaways

• 👨‍👩‍👧‍👦 **Family Reactions**: Lifestyle changes can be challenging due to family reactions, especially when it involves dietary habits.
• 🌟 **Personal Growth**: Dr. Edith Ubuntu Chan believes that we choose our families to learn life lessons and grow from challenges.
• 🤝 **Community Support**: Finding new communities that align with your lifestyle changes is crucial for social support and success.
• 🌱 **Plant-Based Example**: If you're transitioning to a plant-based diet, surround yourself with like-minded individuals for support and resources.
• 🏃‍♀️ **Exercise Communities**: For new exercise routines, join communities that share your interests, such as running or dancing groups.
• 💬 **Communication**: Respond to family concerns with patience and understanding, acknowledging their love and concern.
• 🕊️ **Patience**: Over time, show your family through your vibrant health and happiness that your lifestyle changes are beneficial.
• 🤗 **Non-Preaching**: Avoid preaching; instead, wait for the right moment or when family members express interest in your changes.
• 📚 **Resource Sharing**: Share resources like books or documentaries that inspired your lifestyle changes, rather than lecturing.
• 💖 **Common Ground**: Focus on common interests with family members to build connections based on joy and love.
• 🌐 **Inspiring Others**: By living a healthy lifestyle, you can inspire family and friends to consider their own lifestyle choices.

Q & A

What is the main challenge discussed in Dr. Edith Ubuntu Chan's video?

The main challenge discussed is the reactions and responses from friends and family, particularly when making lifestyle changes to support personal well-being.

Why can changing dietary habits be difficult when interacting with family?

Changing dietary habits can be difficult because family members may have grown up eating certain foods that are now being avoided, and these foods might be prevalent during family gatherings.

What is Dr. Edith Ubuntu Chan's perspective on the role of family in our lives?

Dr. Edith Ubuntu Chan believes that we, as souls or spirits, choose our family to learn lessons and grow from challenges, implying that we have the capacity to harmonize with family challenges.

Why is it important to find new communities when making lifestyle changes?

New communities provide a social support system that is crucial for making lifestyle or habit changes, offering resources and stability to help individuals feel more confident in their new habits.

How does Dr. Chan suggest responding to family members' concerns about lifestyle changes?

Dr. Chan suggests acknowledging the love and concern behind their statements, responding patiently, and reassuring them that you are okay, without necessarily preaching your new beliefs.

What approach does Dr. Chan recommend when family members notice positive changes in you?

Dr. Chan recommends waiting for family members to notice and comment on positive changes, then sharing information about your lifestyle changes if they express interest.

How can focusing on common interests help in harmonizing with family during lifestyle changes?

Focusing on common interests allows for connection and shared joy, reducing the emphasis on differences and avoiding the ego-driven perspective that may create division.

What is the most effective way to share lifestyle change insights with family, according to Dr. Chan?

The most effective way is to share resources like books or documentaries that inspired the changes, rather than preaching, and to offer more information if asked.

How should we approach family members who question our lifestyle choices out of concern?

We should approach them with understanding and gentleness, recognizing that their questions come from a place of love and concern, and that our changes may prompt them to reconsider their own choices.

What does Dr. Chan encourage viewers to do to support each other in the community?

Dr. Chan encourages viewers to share their experiences and strategies for harmonizing with family during lifestyle changes, to learn from each other and create a supportive community.

Outlines

00:00

🌿 Navigating Family Reactions to Lifestyle Changes

Dr. Edith Ubuntu Chan, a holistic high-performance coach and Chinese medicine doctor, discusses the challenges of making lifestyle changes, particularly when it comes to dietary habits, and the reactions from friends and family. She empathizes with the audience, acknowledging the difficulty of such changes and the common issue of family members' resistance. Dr. Chan suggests that these challenges are part of our soul's growth and that we have the capacity to overcome them. She emphasizes the importance of finding new communities that support the desired lifestyle changes, such as plant-based diets or exercise routines, to provide a social support system. The key is to surround oneself with people who are already living the changes to feel more stable and confident. Dr. Chan also shares personal strategies for harmonizing with family, including understanding their concerns as coming from a place of love, being patient, and waiting for the right moment to share one's lifestyle changes.

05:01

🤝 Harmonizing with Family Through Shared Interests and Patience

In the second paragraph, Dr. Chan continues the discussion on how to harmonize with family when making lifestyle changes. She advises against preaching one's new lifestyle choices to family members and instead suggests focusing on common interests to build connections based on love and joy. She encourages letting go of ego and finding shared activities or topics that can be enjoyed together. Dr. Chan also stresses the importance of responding to family members' questions about lifestyle changes with gentleness and understanding, recognizing that their concerns stem from love and concern. She shares her approach to sharing lifestyle changes, which involves waiting for the right moment and offering resources like books or documentaries rather than preaching. The goal is to inspire and uplift family members at their own pace. Dr. Chan concludes by inviting the audience to share their experiences and strategies for harmonizing with family, fostering a supportive community.

Keywords

💡Wellness

Wellness refers to a state of being in good health, both physically and mentally. In the video, Dr. Edith Ubuntu Chan discusses the journey of wellness and personal development, emphasizing the importance of making lifestyle changes to support one's well-being. The concept is central to the video's theme, as it encourages viewers to adopt new habits and practices that contribute to their overall health and happiness.

💡Lifestyle Changes

Lifestyle changes are significant modifications in one's daily habits and routines aimed at improving health, well-being, or personal growth. The video script highlights the challenges of making such changes, particularly when it comes to dietary habits, and how these can affect interactions with family and friends. Dr. Chan provides advice on how to harmonize these changes with family dynamics.

💡Holistic High Performance Coach

A holistic high performance coach, like Dr. Edith Ubuntu Chan, is a professional who helps individuals achieve their full potential by considering all aspects of their lives, including physical, mental, emotional, and spiritual well-being. In the video, Dr. Chan's role as a holistic coach is evident as she offers guidance on how to navigate the challenges of lifestyle changes in a supportive and comprehensive manner.

💡Chinese Medicine Doctor

A Chinese medicine doctor practices traditional Chinese medicine, which encompasses a variety of treatments such as herbal medicine, acupuncture, and dietary therapy. Dr. Chan's background as a Chinese medicine doctor informs her perspective on wellness, emphasizing the importance of balance and harmony in one's lifestyle, which is a recurring theme in the video.

💡Social Support System

A social support system consists of friends, family, and community members who provide emotional, practical, and informational assistance. In the video, Dr. Chan stresses the importance of finding new communities and a social support system when making lifestyle changes, as this can significantly impact one's success and confidence in maintaining new habits.

💡Plant-Based Diet

A plant-based diet is a way of eating that focuses on consuming foods derived from plants, such as vegetables, fruits, grains, nuts, and seeds, and typically excludes or minimizes animal products. The video mentions plant-based diets as an example of a lifestyle change that some individuals might adopt for health reasons, and how this can create challenges when interacting with family members who have different dietary habits.

💡Ego

Ego, in the context of the video, refers to the self-centered aspect of one's personality that can lead to feelings of superiority or judgment towards others. Dr. Chan advises viewers to let go of ego and focus on the loving and kind parts of themselves when interacting with family members who may not understand or agree with their lifestyle choices.

💡Harmonize

To harmonize means to bring into a state of balance or agreement. In the video, Dr. Chan discusses the importance of harmonizing with family members when making lifestyle changes, suggesting that it's possible to maintain healthy relationships while pursuing personal growth and well-being.

💡Self-Care Practice

Self-care practices are activities that individuals engage in to maintain or improve their health and well-being. The video script mentions self-care practices as a way for individuals to improve their own well-being, and as a topic that can be shared with family members in a non-preachy manner, potentially inspiring them to adopt similar practices.

💡Community

Community, in the context of the video, refers to a group of people who share common interests, goals, or values. Dr. Chan encourages viewers to find and surround themselves with communities that support their new lifestyle choices, such as plant-based eating or regular exercise, to gain social support and feel more confident in their decisions.

Highlights

Dr. Edith Ubuntu Chan introduces the topic of managing reactions from friends and family when making lifestyle changes for wellness.

The challenge of changing eating habits, especially when visiting relatives who serve foods one has decided to avoid.

Advice on harmonizing with family by acknowledging the support and challenges they provide in one's wellness journey.

The importance of finding new communities for social support when making lifestyle changes.

Suggestion to surround oneself with people who are already living the lifestyle one aspires to.

The idea that as souls, we choose our families to learn lessons and grow from challenges.

Encouragement to trust one's capacity to harmonize with family challenges.

The role of the Ayah community in supporting individuals through lifestyle changes.

Strategies for responding to family members' concerns about lifestyle changes, such as eating less meat.

The recommendation to be patient and allow family to observe positive changes over time.

The suggestion to not preach but wait for family to express interest in one's lifestyle changes.

The importance of focusing on common interests with family rather than differences.

The approach to sharing lifestyle changes with family by offering resources rather than preaching.

The idea that family's questions about lifestyle choices come from a place of love and concern.

Advice on finding an elegant balance when making lifestyle changes to avoid discomforting family.

An invitation for viewers to share their experiences and strategies for harmonizing with family during lifestyle changes.

Dr. E encourages viewers to join the Ayah community for further support and resources.

Transcripts

hi my friends it's dr edith ubuntu chan

i'm a holistic high performance coach

and a chinese medicine doctor here with

another episode of activate your

awesomeness

[Music]

in today's episode i'd love to chat with

you about a topic that comes up very

often

when those of us are on a journey of

wellness and personal development making

lifestyle changes and changes in our

habits to support our well-being often

the hardest thing is the reactions and

response from our friends and family

particularly our family

don't you agree that that can be

sometimes the greatest challenge take

for example eating changes you know

you've decided to give up certain foods

that you've discovered through your

study and research to be not that

healthy for your well-being

but

maybe your family grew up eating some of

these foods and when you visit with

relatives

those old foods that you're no longer

wanting to eat is everywhere and it's

like the only thing to eat

so how do you harmonize with that it can

be super tricky

well first i want to point out you know

kudos to you good job for all the good

work you've already done in that

department and i want to let you know

that we're all feeling with you we all

go through that challenge together

i believe on some level that we as souls

or spirits chose which family to

incarnate

into to learn a certain set of uh

lessons or to grow from a certain set of

challenges

so i have full faith that you have the

capacity within you to harmonize with

any of these challenges you might be

facing with your family at this moment

and we as a community as the ayah

community we're all here to support you

speaking of community when it comes to

lifestyle changes the first most

important thing is to find new

communities whenever you're making new

lifestyle changes

let's make sure you have that social

support system because that's a huge

part of the battle when it comes to

making lifestyle or habit changes

so surround yourself with people that

are already stable in that new lifestyle

change let's say you are trying to eat a

more plant-based diet surround yourself

with tons of people that are eating the

plant-based diet and they'll have a lot

of the resources to support you to being

successful so that you feel more stable

and more confident in your new habits

when you go and meet with your family

likewise if you're

looking to take up a certain exercise

regimen surround yourself with a

community of people that like running or

that like to take zumba or dancing or

like hiking and so on so you feel really

fulfilled in the social aspects and then

when you do join with your family you

don't feel that lack that something is

missing at the end of the day we're all

social creatures so having harmony with

our friends family and community is

really important to all of us so i'd

love to share with you what's worked for

me as i've made some lifestyle changes

how to harmonize with my family

first is to notice that when family

members come to us and say oh well

you're doing this and that you know are

you sure and for example when i chose to

eat less and less meat like many moms

you know my mom was concerned no meat

what are you gonna eat so it's really

good to tune into the fact that it's out

of love

and concern

that our family makes these statements

and we can respond with yeah i know you

love me so much don't worry mom i'm

gonna be okay

and just be patient

sometimes you don't even have to say

anything

it's just a matter of time

if consistently

every time you gather with your family

they notice you look really vibrant

really happy really healthy

isn't that what everybody in our family

all our friends they all want that for

us

so when they make any comments it's only

because

they haven't been educated

to

the facts that you have

so instead of you preaching to them

just wait maybe we don't even bring up

these changes that we're going through

but they might say hey

is that a haircut or a new shirt or

what's going on you look really good

what's new with you

that's when you can say well actually

i've been doing this

self-care practice i've been doing

breathing every day i've been taking

walks every day or i've been eating in

this certain way and i feel really great

you want to learn about it i can tell

you about it and they might say yes or

no if they're not interested then that's

end of story when we gather with our

friends and family we're not there to

preach our new exciting thing to them

we're there just to connect in love and

joy so find what you do have in common

instead of focusing on all the

differences instead of focusing your

mind on oh my family is so

unevolved you know they don't make these

conscious choices that i do that's

actually just your ego speaking

if you let go of the ego part of you

into the loving kind part of you then

you might talk about things you do have

in common

like gardening or you know like uh like

wow look at how beautiful you've

decorated your house and things that you

can join together in a state of joy and

love with and when they do ask you about

your lifestyle changes that is really

the only moment where in my opinion is

appropriate to share

and if they want to learn more i think

what i found the most

effective is instead of preaching and

preaching and preaching nobody likes

being preached to is to share it like

hey i read this book do you want to read

it too that's what inspired me or i

watched this documentary and it blew my

mind and that's why i decided to make

this big lifestyle change and here

here's the documentary check it out and

then if you want to ask me more i can

share with you more resources i feel

that those are the most appropriate way

to harmonize with the energies of our

family and also at the perfect moment

uplift and inspire them to also

get on board with some of these

lifestyle changes that are working so

great for you

at the end of the day

just to come back down to the

fundamental

to understand that our friends and

family they love us

if

they question your lifestyle choices is

always because they're coming from a

state of love and concern

and that sometimes when you do things

different from them

it can cause them to start to

at their own way their own pace

question their lifestyle choices

which understandably can be very

uncomfortable for our friends and family

so we want to be really gentle with that

so

finding an elegant balance when we make

these changes i think it's a skill that

we can all devote some love and

attention and cultivating

and what about you i'd love if you could

leave a comment below and let us know

what's worked well for you when it comes

to harmonizing with your family when

there's been different lifestyle changes

and so on what has worked for you we can

all learn from each other so together

let's create an ayah community an

awesomeness community where we can

support and nourish each other in

uplifting ourselves our friends our

family and ripple effects into the whole

planet

[Music]

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[Music]

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