5 Rare Habits That Will Make You A Beast

Chris Williamson
1 Nov 202208:35

Summary

TLDRIn this video, the speaker emphasizes the importance of physical and mental strength, particularly for those in their 20s and 30s, suggesting that pushing one's limits in activities like weightlifting and long-distance running builds resilience. They advocate for developing grit and strength early on, which can be applied to various aspects of life, including work and relationships. The speaker also encourages relocating to a city for better opportunities and stresses the significance of finding a compatible partner, which they argue is the most critical decision one can make in their 20s and 30s. They advise taking risks, embracing rejection, and engaging with strangers to increase the chances of finding a great partner and building a fulfilling life.

Takeaways

  • πŸ’ͺ Develop physical and mental strength by pushing your limits in activities like weightlifting and long-distance running.
  • πŸ™οΈ Move to a city to increase your opportunities and improve your skills by being around highly competitive and talented individuals.
  • 🀝 Actively seek out social interactions and opportunities to meet potential partners, embracing the discomfort and risk of rejection.
  • 🚫 Don't be afraid to take risks and step out of your comfort zone, whether in personal relationships or professional networking.
  • πŸ‹οΈβ€β™‚οΈ Recognize the importance of physical fitness and the confidence it can bring, especially in your 20s and 30s.
  • πŸƒβ€β™‚οΈ Use physical endurance activities as a metaphor for life's challenges, learning to push through when you think you can't go on.
  • πŸ’Ό Understand that your early career choices, like working long hours, can signal your commitment and lead to professional success.
  • πŸ‘« Prioritize finding a great life partner, as it can significantly impact your overall happiness and well-being.
  • πŸ’Ό Choose your industry and place of work wisely, as these decisions will shape your economic security and personal growth.
  • πŸŒ† Embrace city life for the opportunities it presents, but also for the personal growth that comes from navigating a diverse and challenging environment.

Q & A

  • What is the advice given for physical fitness in one's 20s and 30s?

    -The advice is to lift heavy weights and run long distances to push oneself physically and mentally. This helps in building strength and resilience that can be recalled and admired in later years.

  • Why is it beneficial to push oneself to the limit during physical activities in one's 20s and 30s?

    -Pushing oneself to the limit helps in discovering one's true physical and mental capabilities, building confidence, and developing grit, which can be applied to overcoming challenges in various aspects of life.

  • What is the significance of the rower's experience mentioned in the script?

    -The rower's experience illustrates the importance of learning one's limits at a young age, which can provide a sense of confidence and resilience when facing difficult situations later in life.

  • Why is it recommended to work in a city during one's 20s and 30s?

    -Working in a city provides opportunities to compete and learn from the best, which can significantly improve one's skills and performance, similar to playing sports with top athletes.

  • What is the advice for finding a partner in one's 20s and 30s?

    -The advice is to actively seek out and engage with potential partners, to be open to rejection, and to take risks in order to increase the chances of finding a great match.

  • Why is it important to take risks and be comfortable with rejection when looking for a partner?

    -Taking risks and being comfortable with rejection increases the number of opportunities to meet potential partners and helps in developing resilience, which is crucial for success in both personal and professional life.

  • What is the significance of the speaker's story about meeting their partner at the Raleigh Hotel?

    -The story emphasizes the importance of taking uncomfortable risks and initiating conversations with people one is attracted to, which can lead to meaningful relationships.

  • How does the speaker suggest approaching potential partners at work?

    -The speaker suggests approaching potential partners at work by expressing interest and inviting them for a coffee, while being careful not to abuse power or make anyone uncomfortable.

  • What is the advice for building economic security in one's 20s and 30s?

    -The advice is to find something one is good at and start building a base for economic security, while also focusing on personal development and building relationships.

  • Why is it important to be around strangers and engage with them regularly?

    -Being around and engaging with strangers regularly helps in developing social skills, creating opportunities for economic and personal growth, and finding potential partners.

  • What is the overall theme of the advice given for people in their 20s and 30s?

    -The overall theme is to push oneself physically, mentally, and emotionally, to take risks, be resilient in the face of rejection, and actively seek out opportunities for personal and professional growth.

Outlines

00:00

πŸ’ͺ Developing Strength and Grit in Your 20s and 30s

The speaker emphasizes the importance of physical and mental strength during one's 20s and 30s. They suggest engaging in intense physical activities like weightlifting and long-distance running to build endurance and resilience. The speaker shares personal experiences, such as rowing crew in college and working long hours at an investment bank, to illustrate the value of pushing oneself to the limit. They argue that these experiences build confidence and a strong work ethic, which are crucial for success in life and relationships. Additionally, the speaker advises moving to a city to be around high achievers, which can elevate one's own performance, and to actively seek out social opportunities to meet potential partners.

05:01

πŸŒ† Embracing Risk and Building Social Connections

In this paragraph, the speaker discusses the necessity of taking uncomfortable risks to achieve great things in life. They encourage sending unsolicited emails, reaching out to admired individuals, and stepping out of one's comfort zone to build connections. The speaker stresses the importance of finding a great partner, which they consider the most significant decision one can make in their 20s and 30s. They recount their own story of meeting their partner and how it changed their life, highlighting the value of putting oneself in situations where meaningful connections can be made. The speaker also addresses the fear of rejection and the importance of being comfortable with it, as it is an inevitable part of life. They conclude by advocating for physical and mental strength, economic responsibility, and being active in social settings to maximize opportunities for success.

Mindmap

Keywords

πŸ’‘Lifting heavy weights

Lifting heavy weights refers to engaging in strength training exercises that involve lifting weights to build muscle and increase physical strength. In the context of the video, it symbolizes pushing oneself to physical limits, which can translate to mental and emotional resilience. The speaker encourages individuals in their 20s and 30s to engage in such activities to build strength and endurance, which can be metaphorically applied to overcoming life's challenges.

πŸ’‘Running long distances

Running long distances is a form of cardiovascular exercise that involves running for extended periods to improve endurance and stamina. The video uses this as a metaphor for personal development, suggesting that pushing oneself physically can build mental toughness and resilience. It's about understanding one's limits and surpassing them, which is applicable to various aspects of life, including career and relationships.

πŸ’‘Grit

Grit is defined as perseverance and passion for long-term goals. In the video, the speaker emphasizes the importance of developing grit in one's 20s and 30s, suggesting that it's a critical trait for success. The speaker's own experience of working long hours at their first job to demonstrate commitment and capability is used as an example of how grit can be developed and displayed.

πŸ’‘City life

City life refers to living and working in urban environments. The video suggests that being in a city can accelerate personal and professional growth due to increased competition and access to opportunities. It's likened to playing tennis with professional players, where one's skills improve by being exposed to higher levels of competition.

πŸ’‘Rejection

Rejection is the act of being turned down or dismissed. The video discusses embracing rejection as a natural part of life, especially in the pursuit of success and relationships. The speaker argues that facing and overcoming rejection builds resilience and is a necessary step towards achieving one's goals, whether in business or personal life.

πŸ’‘Mating and relationships

Mating and relationships refer to the process of finding a partner and forming intimate connections. The video emphasizes the importance of taking risks and being proactive in meeting potential partners, suggesting that the quality of one's relationships can significantly impact life satisfaction. The speaker shares a personal anecdote about meeting their partner, highlighting the importance of seizing opportunities.

πŸ’‘Economic security

Economic security means having a stable and sufficient income to cover basic needs and provide financial stability. In the video, the speaker advises focusing on building a foundation of economic security in one's 20s and 30s, which can serve as a platform for personal and family well-being in the future.

πŸ’‘Risk-taking

Risk-taking involves engaging in actions or decisions that have uncertain outcomes. The video encourages taking calculated risks, such as reaching out to strangers or pursuing challenging career opportunities, to achieve personal growth and success. It's presented as a necessary step for making significant progress in life.

πŸ’‘Social interaction

Social interaction refers to the process of communicating and engaging with others. The video stresses the importance of being around people and actively participating in social activities to build networks, find opportunities, and develop personal relationships. It's portrayed as a fundamental aspect of human nature and a key to success in various life domains.

πŸ’‘Physical strength

Physical strength is the capacity to exert force or power through muscle contractions. The video uses physical strength as a metaphor for overall resilience and capability. The speaker shares personal experiences of pushing physical limits, suggesting that such experiences can build confidence and a sense of capability that extends to other areas of life.

πŸ’‘Self-improvement

Self-improvement involves the process of personal development and striving to better oneself. The video discusses various aspects of self-improvement, such as physical fitness, mental toughness, and social skills, as essential for navigating life successfully. It's presented as an ongoing process that should be prioritized, especially during one's 20s and 30s.

Highlights

The importance of physical and mental strength in one's 20s and 30s, including lifting heavy weights and running long distances.

The value of pushing oneself to the limit in sports, like rowing, to build resilience for future challenges.

The significance of developing grit and strength in one's early career, exemplified by working long hours to demonstrate commitment.

The advice to live in a big city to improve one's skills and opportunities by being around highly skilled people.

The necessity of being proactive in social situations to increase the chances of finding a suitable partner.

The inevitability of rejection and the importance of being comfortable with it for personal and professional growth.

The impact of choosing the right place to live, work, and the industry on one's success and happiness.

The critical decision of selecting a life partner and the importance of having a supportive and compatible spouse.

The story of meeting a partner at a social event and the courage it took to initiate a conversation.

The encouragement to take uncomfortable risks and the potential rewards that come with it.

The recommendation to be around strangers and create opportunities for personal and professional growth.

The suggestion to join social groups or activities to increase the chances of meeting potential partners and building a network.

The importance of being physically strong and confident in one's abilities to handle any situation.

The humorous note on the decline of physical strength with age and the importance of maintaining health.

The final thoughts on the necessity of being strong, taking risks, and being around people for personal development.

Transcripts

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what advice would you give to people

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that are in their 30s are entering their

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30s about how to operate in life

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I think it's really situational I don't

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think there's a user's manual I think

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there's some best practices and I don't

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think it's that much different than in

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your 20s

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um the first is very Primal I think

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every person in their 20s and 30s should

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lift heavy weights and run long

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distances in their brain and in the gym

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push yourself really hard when you're in

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your 20s and 30s you don't even realize

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how old are you 34. okay so like you

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look like a beast in in 20 years you're

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just going to look back on how strong

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you were and just marvel at it and

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you're going to wish as strong as you

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were that you even push yourself harder

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I rode crew it was such a valuable part

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of my life I did at the age of 19. and I

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remember in the midst of a race it's a 2

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000 meter race

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and I remember not being able to feel my

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legs starting to black out and having to

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concentrate on not blacking out from

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exhaustion my and the the oxygen or the

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air going down my esophagus was on fire

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tastes like blood and metal in your

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throat yeah and that was at 800 meters

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and you'd go 2 000. and that ability

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just when you think just when you think

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you can't take any more

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that means you're about a third of the

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way to your limits as as a as a human as

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a species learning that as a young man

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or woman is a blessing because what it

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means is you have the confidence that

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when when things are hard physically

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emotionally mentally you realize oh my

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God I could take so much more and still

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be fine and when I worked my first job

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was a Morton Stanley Investment Bank and

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I was undereducated relative to my peer

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group not because I didn't go to a great

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school I went to UCLA but I spent the

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majority of my five years there making

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bongs out of household items and

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watching Planet of the Apes so I wasn't

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as skilled as my peer group so I decided

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every Tuesday morning I was going to

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come into work

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and I wasn't going to leave till

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Wednesday night

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and I'm like I can do that I'm

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physically really strong I'm mentally

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really strong

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and it sent a signal to the rest of the

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organization that I came to play

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develop that kind of grit and strength

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emotionally physically and

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intellectually in your 20s and 30s

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you're capable of it you're just going

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to look back on that errand like just

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marvel it out out of [Β __Β ] control

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strong you are both mentally and

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physically

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2. get to a city if you can and that

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sounds very practical or wrote but you'd

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rather be good in a big city than great

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in a small City before you collect dogs

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and kids

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you know being in a city is like playing

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tennis with Roger Federer or Nadal when

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you play with people much better than

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you your game gets much better you're

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playing against the best when you're in

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a city

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uh

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find create as many opportunities to

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find a mate now what do I mean by that

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get out as often as possible accept

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invitations force yourself to go out

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force yourself to meet strangers develop

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the skills

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uh start whenever you're waiting in line

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at Starbucks talk to the person in front

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of you talk to the person behind you

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develop the skills to begin opening and

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establishing relationships and it's

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uncomfortable and it means getting used

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to rejection

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and by the way the only thing I can

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guarantee you in life

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is rejection and the only thing I

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guarantee a lot of if you want to be

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successful is a [Β __Β ] ton of rejection

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being an entrepreneur just means you're

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willing to take out a big spoon and eat

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[Β __Β ] all the time talking people into

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working for you talking clients into to

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to to engaging you talking investors

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into investing and having 90 plus

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percent of them saying no and the same

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is true with successful mating the most

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important decision you'll make in your

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20s and 30s is where you live where you

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work what industry you're going to it's

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who you decide to partner with

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specifically who you decide to

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ultimately have kids with and I have

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close friends who are monstrously

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successful by every external metric and

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they don't have great lives because they

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don't have real Partners in their

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spouses and I have other friends who

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struggle economically and it's hard

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but everything's a little easier for

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them because they have a real partner

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and the way you punch above your weight

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class and find a great mate uh you know

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emotionally intellectually from a value

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standpoint sexually is you give yourself

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as many opportunities as possible and my

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story is I met uh my partner who I had

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kids with at the Raleigh Hotel at the

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pool at the Raleigh Hotel in South Beach

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about 17 years ago it was the middle of

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the day and I walked in and I think it's

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important to do this I walked in and I

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saw someone I was really attracted to

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and I said I'm going to talk to this

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person before I leave and I promise

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myself and I went up

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in the full light of midday sun when she

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was sitting with another guy and another

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girl and opened and without the aid of

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alcohol that is not easy that is not

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easy and fast forward my oldest son's

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middle name is Raleigh if you nothing

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wonderful is going to happen to you

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unless you take an uncomfortable risk so

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get good at taking them get good at

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sending blind emails to LinkedIn

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contacts to ask them for coffee to see

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if they'll talk to you about that

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industry

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reach out to people tell them you admire

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them try and become friends with them

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you know you're you're an interesting

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guy I was just thinking to myself I'd

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love to know this guy does he live in

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London he just seems very cool get

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comfortable taking those sorts of risks

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get comfortable with rejection nothing

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wonderful will happen to you unless you

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take an uncomfortable risk the most

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important thing you can find in your

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life in your 20s and 30s is something

play05:38

that you're good at so that you can

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start

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building a base around Economic Security

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but the the real key is to find a great

play05:47

partner and that is going to be a

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function of liquidity how many great

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Partners potential great Partners you

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approach and unfortunately

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the far left of which I'm apart as tree

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as as counseled men that if you start

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talking to a woman at work and you

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express any sort of Interest it means

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you're toxic no it doesn't if you don't

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know the difference between expressing

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interest and having coffee with someone

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and harassing them you've got much

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bigger problems a third of relationships

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begin at work I'm not suggesting anyone

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should ever abuse their power I'm I'm

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not suggesting you shouldn't be very

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careful that you're ever leveraging

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power making anyone uncomfortable but

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for God's sakes go up and talk to

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strangers there's nothing wrong with

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that and if you approach a strange woman

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and and try and express get a

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conversation going and she's not

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interested you're both going to be fine

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you're both gonna be fine and what I see

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as a generation of men who don't take

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care of themselves physically and become

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so isolated that the idea of talking to

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a strange woman is so alien and alien

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and uncomfortable to them they just

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rather stay home and do something else

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and I don't want to stereotype all

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introverts is is leading to bad places

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that's not true at all but the majority

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of men you talk to they want to be

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financially successful and they want to

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have a great partner at some point and

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that is a function of of your

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willingness to put yourself in

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uncomfortable situation so anyways get

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mentally and physically strong take

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economic responsibility for your

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household get out of the house as much

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as possible try and find things where

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you're building something in the agency

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of others I don't care every day you

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should be be around strangers every day

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like if it's work I don't know if it's

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church I don't care if it's non-profit a

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softball league the gym classes whatever

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it is you need to be around a massive

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number of strangers and finding reasons

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to have bump off of them and find

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economic and personal and platonic

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opportunities as often as possible we

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are a social species to get to a city

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get around a lot of people get out there

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every day start making money and become

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really strong you should be able to walk

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into any room in your at your age and

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think if [Β __Β ] got real I can kill and

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eat everybody or outrun them one or the

play08:00

other one or the other now I'm at the

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point where I can do neither I'm not

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strong and my knees are going but

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anyways at your age it should be one or

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both you could pay someone to kill

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everybody or coming there you go that

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would be awesome there you go yeah

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what's happening people if you enjoyed

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that then press here for the full

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unedited episode and don't forget to

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subscribe

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peace

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[Music]

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thank you

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[Music]

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