Tres claves para relacionarte con tus hijos adolescentes. Diana Al Azem, profesora

Summary

Diana, a high school teacher and founder of 'Positive Adolescence' platform, shares key principles for navigating adolescence positively. She emphasizes the balance between firmness and freedom, achieved through trust, connection, and control. Trust involves believing in adolescents' ability to set goals, while connection is about maintaining a bond despite setting necessary boundaries. Control here means supervising, not dominating, their actions. Diana advises parents to be patient, explain the rationale behind rules, and focus on reinforcing positive behaviors to boost self-esteem and motivate continued effort.

Takeaways

• 📚 Diana, a high school teacher and founder of 'Adolescencia Positiva', shares insights on navigating adolescence positively.
• 💡 The two fundamental principles in educating children are balance and the equilibrium between firmness and freedom.
• 🔑 Achieving balance is possible through 'the three Cs': Confidence, Connection, and Control.
• 👫 Confidence is about trusting that our children can set and achieve their own goals with the tools provided during their childhood.
• 🤝 Connection emphasizes the importance of maintaining a strong bond with our children despite the necessary rules and limits.
• 👀 Control in this context means supervising our children's activities without invading their space, rather than dominating them.
• 🧠 Adolescents may reject basic rules due to neural pruning during their brain development, requiring parents to re-teach and reinforce these norms.
• 🌱 The process of individuation and the desire for freedom are key aspects of adolescence, where teenagers seek to assert control.
• 🌟 Patience is crucial as parents accompany their children through this phase, re-teaching and explaining the importance of rules and communal living.
• 🪄 Adolescents at this age need reasons for rules and limits; responses should be calm and serene, setting an example for future behavior.
• 🤔 Reflecting on our own adolescence can help parents empathize with their children's existential struggles and the need for identity formation.
• 👍 Focusing on the positive aspects of a child's performance, rather than just the negatives, can motivate them and improve their self-esteem.

Q & A

What is the main focus of Diana's platform 'Adolescencia Positiva'?

The main focus of 'Adolescencia Positiva' is to provide guidance for parents and teachers on how to navigate the adolescent phase of children in a positive way.

What are the two fundamental principles of educating children according to Diana?

The two fundamental principles are balance between firmness and freedom, and the importance of trust, connection, and control.

How does Diana define 'trust' in the context of adolescent education?

Trust refers to having faith in adolescents' ability to set their own goals, meet objectives, and use the tools and resources provided during their childhood to navigate adolescence.

What role does 'connection' play in the relationship between parents and adolescents?

Connection is crucial as it ensures that despite the rules and boundaries set by parents, the bond with their adolescents remains strong and supportive.

How does Diana differentiate 'control' from 'controlling' in adolescent supervision?

Diana differentiates 'control' as supervising what adolescents are doing without invading their space, rather than dominating or exerting complete authority over them.

Why might adolescents start rejecting basic rules set by their parents during adolescence?

Adolescents might reject basic rules due to the neural pruning that occurs in their brains during this stage, which can make them forget previously learned behaviors.

What does Diana suggest parents do when adolescents question or reject family norms?

Diana suggests parents should patiently re-teach norms and explain the reasons behind them, emphasizing the importance of community and shared living spaces.

How should parents respond to adolescents' questioning of adult authority?

Parents should respond calmly and serenely, reasoning with their adolescents and providing explanations for rules and limits.

What impact can parents' behaviors and responses have on their children's future?

Parents' behaviors and responses serve as a reflection for their children, influencing how they will behave and respond in their adult lives.

Why is it important for parents to listen to their adolescents' interests and experiences, according to Diana?

Listening to adolescents' interests and experiences is important because it allows them to share their world with their parents, fostering a deeper understanding and connection.

What advice does Diana give to parents regarding acknowledging their children's achievements?

Diana advises parents to focus more on what their children do well and less on what they do not meet parental expectations in, to motivate them and improve their self-esteem.