The Art of Decision-Making Without Stress | Kannan Gopinathan | TEDxIIFTDelhi

Summary

The speaker, a former IAS officer and a 'resignation aspirant,' shares his journey of self-discovery and service. He emphasizes the importance of aligning actions with one's thoughts to avoid hypocrisy and discusses his experiences teaching underprivileged children, which led to a realization about the need for systemic change. He recounts his time in Mizoram, dealing with the aftermath of insurgency and the importance of institutional checks on government power. The speaker also reflects on his role in the bureaucracy, his work during the Kerala floods, and the significance of patience and preparation in achieving one's goals.

Takeaways

• 😀 The speaker expresses gratitude for the invitation and acknowledges the novelty of a one-sided talk format, contrasting it with his usual interactive engagements.
• 🎓 He prefers to identify as a 'resignation aspirant' rather than a former IAS officer, highlighting his ongoing struggle to leave the service after 4 and a half years.
• 🤔 The speaker emphasizes the importance of authenticity, suggesting that aligning one's actions with personal thoughts is crucial to avoid hypocrisy.
• 👴 Reflecting on aging, he humorously notes the physical changes like graying hair, symbolizing the passage of time and life decisions without fearing consequences.
• 🏆 He underscores the significance of courage and the belief in one's country and institutions, viewing it as a privilege to be guarded for future generations.
• 🏫 The narrative includes a personal journey from studying engineering to realizing a deeper calling, leading to community engagement and teaching underprivileged children.
• 💑 His wife's influence and their shared experiences in social work played a pivotal role in his decision to join the civil service to effect systemic change.
• 🏛️ The speaker's tenure in the civil service was marked by a commitment to empower citizens, learning from his interactions, especially in Mizoram, and dealing with the aftermath of insurgency.
• 🌊 He shares his experiences during the Kerala floods, highlighting the importance of individual contributions and the challenges of bureaucratic processes.
• ⚖️ The speaker discusses the implications of the abrogation of Article 370 in Kashmir, expressing concern over the government's actions and the erosion of citizens' rights.
• 🔄 He concludes with a story about patience, emphasizing the importance of persistent preparation without being preoccupied with immediate results.

Q & A

Why did the speaker feel the need to transition from the private sector to the public sector?

The speaker felt the need to transition because they realized that they could not effectively bring about change and address the needs they saw in society from outside the system. They believed that to truly make a difference, one must be part of the system.

What was the turning point for the speaker that led to their decision to join the civil service?

The turning point was when the speaker and their wife started teaching underprivileged children and realized the limitations of their impact outside the system. This, coupled with their wife's decision to join the civil service, motivated the speaker to join a coaching institute, which eventually led to their entry into the IAS.

How did the speaker's experience with teaching children in the NOA sector influence their perspective on education?

The experience highlighted the challenges of providing consistent education to children in underprivileged areas and the need for systemic change. It also underscored the importance of daily engagement in education and the limitations of sporadic teaching efforts.

What was the speaker's reaction to the children's质疑 of their integrity during their teaching initiative?

The speaker felt hurt and questioned their self-worth and the value of their efforts. This led to a deeper introspection about the balance between personal ego and public service, ultimately reinforcing their commitment to serving others over personal pride.

How did the speaker's experience in Mizoram shape their understanding of bureaucracy and governance?

The speaker's experience in Mizoram, particularly dealing with the aftermath of insurgency and the process of compensating affected citizens, reinforced their belief in the importance of upholding citizens' rights and the role of bureaucracy in empowering people.

What was the speaker's stance on the abrogation of Article 370 in Kashmir?

The speaker was critical of the way Article 370 was abrogated and the subsequent restrictions imposed on the people of Kashmir, viewing it as an infringement on the rights of citizens without proper legal or constitutional backing.

Why did the speaker choose to participate in flood relief efforts in Kerala?

The speaker felt a personal need to contribute as an individual, beyond their official duties as a civil servant. They wanted to make a direct impact and help those affected by the floods, which led them to take part in relief operations.

What was the speaker's approach to handling the criticism and challenges they faced in their career?

The speaker chose to prioritize the good of others over their personal ego and self-respect. They believed in maintaining a balance between learning, doing, and sharing, and used introspection to guide their actions and decisions.

What is the significance of the story about boiling water shared by the speaker?

The story emphasizes the importance of patience and perseverance. It suggests that one should focus on the preparatory work and not be overly concerned with immediate results, as long as they are committed to the process.

How does the speaker define success and fulfillment in their life?

The speaker defines success and fulfillment as being in a constant state of learning, doing, or sharing. They believe that as long as they are engaged in one of these phases, they feel a sense of purpose and satisfaction.

Outlines

00:00

🎤 Personal Reflections and Journey

The speaker begins by expressing gratitude for the invitation to speak, noting that they have been away from public speaking for some time. They reflect on their current status as a 'resignation aspirant,' having left the IAS but still awaiting formal acceptance of their resignation. The speaker emphasizes the importance of authenticity and aligning one's actions with their thoughts, highlighting the hypocrisy that can arise from a disconnect between the two. They recount their journey, starting from a typical academic path to realizing a desire to do more, leading to teaching underprivileged children. The narrative includes meeting their spouse during this phase and the decision to join the IAS to effect systemic change. The speaker also shares a personal anecdote about aging and the courage to make decisions without fearing consequences, rooted in trust in one's country and institutions.

05:00

🤔 The Struggle with Ego and Public Service

In this segment, the speaker recounts a challenging experience where they were questioned by children they were teaching about their motives and the distribution of funds. This incident led to a realization about prioritizing public service over personal ego and self-respect. The speaker discusses their understanding of bureaucracy as a means to empower citizens and shares a poignant story from their time in Mizoram, where they had to address historical injustices. They express a deep belief in the Indian constitution and institutions, and their commitment to public service is tested when they witness the government's overreach and the failure of institutions to check such power. The speaker's disillusionment with the system's inability to protect citizens' rights, especially in the context of Kashmir, prompts them to speak out.

10:02

🛠️ Active Citizenship and Learning from Experiences

The speaker shares their involvement in flood relief efforts in Kerala, highlighting the importance of individual contributions beyond their official duties. They reflect on the need to be in a constant state of learning, doing, or sharing, which provides a sense of purpose and fulfillment. The speaker also discusses the controversial issue of Article 370 in Kashmir, expressing concern over the government's actions and the lack of institutional checks. They emphasize the importance of balancing the right to life with the right to liberty, and the government's role in preserving both. The narrative concludes with a story about patience, where a guru teaches a student the value of perseverance and preparation, advising against premature assessments of progress.

15:04

🌟 Conclusion and Final Thoughts

In the concluding part, the speaker reiterates the importance of being in a state of learning, doing, or sharing, and how this approach has guided their life. They end with a story that illustrates the value of patience and the wisdom of focusing on the preparatory process rather than constantly checking for immediate results. The speaker thanks the audience for the invitation and for their attention, leaving them with a message of perseverance and trust in one's journey.

Keywords

💡Resignation aspirant

A 'resignation aspirant' refers to someone who has submitted their resignation but is still awaiting its acceptance. In the context of the video, the speaker identifies as a 'resignation aspirant' from the Indian Administrative Service (IAS), indicating a desire to leave their position, which has not yet been officially accepted, thus reflecting a period of transition and uncertainty.

💡Hypocrisy

Hypocrisy is the act of pretending to have beliefs, virtues, or feelings that one does not actually possess. The speaker emphasizes the importance of aligning one's thoughts with their actions to avoid hypocrisy, suggesting that the worst form of hypocrisy is the discrepancy between one's thoughts and actions. This concept is central to the speaker's personal philosophy and their approach to public service.

💡Call to action

A 'call to action' is a summons to engage in some specific activity or make a decision. The speaker mentions that their previous talks were often calls to action, indicating a desire to inspire and motivate others to take concrete steps towards change or improvement. This reflects the speaker's belief in the power of individual and collective action.

💡Public service

Public service refers to work carried out by individuals for the benefit of the public, often in government roles. The speaker discusses their experiences and motivations in public service, highlighting the importance of serving the public interest over personal ego or gain. This theme underscores the speaker's commitment to the principles of public service and their struggle with the realities of bureaucracy.

💡Empowering citizens

Empowering citizens involves enhancing their rights, freedoms, and capabilities. The speaker believes that if each citizen in India is empowered, the country as a whole will prosper. This concept is integral to the speaker's vision of the role of government and bureaucracy in society.

💡Institutional check

An 'institutional check' refers to the balance of power and the mechanisms by which institutions can limit or control the actions of others, particularly governments. The speaker discusses the importance of institutional checks to prevent the concentration of power and the potential abuse of authority by the government.

💡Constitutional backing

Constitutional backing implies that actions or decisions have a legal foundation in a country's constitution. The speaker criticizes actions taken by the government that lack such backing, suggesting a disregard for the rule of law and the rights of citizens, particularly in the context of the situation in Kashmir.

💡Right to life vs. right to liberty

The 'right to life' and 'right to liberty' are fundamental rights often discussed in the context of civil liberties. The speaker contrasts these rights, suggesting that the government forced a choice between them, which is a violation of the principles of democracy and human rights. This highlights the speaker's concern for the protection of individual freedoms.

💡Learn, do, share

The speaker outlines a personal philosophy of life that revolves around learning, doing, and sharing. This framework is used to guide personal growth and engagement with the world. It reflects the speaker's belief in the importance of continuous learning, active participation, and the dissemination of knowledge.

💡Patience

Patience is the ability to wait without becoming annoyed or anxious. The speaker concludes with a story that illustrates the virtue of patience, emphasizing the importance of perseverance and the long-term view in achieving one's goals. This story serves as a metaphor for the speaker's own journey and the broader message of the talk.

Highlights

The speaker expresses gratitude for the invitation and discusses their current status as a 'resignation aspirant', highlighting the difficulty of leaving their position.

Emphasizes the importance of being true to oneself and one's thoughts, and the hypocrisy that arises from misalignment between thoughts and actions.

Reflects on the aging process and the realization of the consequences of life decisions, especially in the context of believing in one's country and institutions.

Shares the story of teaching underprivileged children and the challenges faced in ensuring their learning progress.

Narrates how the speaker's wife influenced the decision to join the civil service to effect change from within the system.

Describes the experience of teaching and the pivotal moment when children questioned the speaker's integrity, leading to a reevaluation of priorities.

Reveals a personal philosophy where public service should come before personal ego, a principle tested during the speaker's time in civil service.

Explains the concept of bureaucracy as a means to empower citizens and the speaker's commitment to this ideal.

Shares a poignant story from Mizoram about assessing compensation for those affected by anti-insurgency operations, highlighting the human cost of conflict.

Discusses the role of institutions in checking government power and the speaker's disillusionment with the failure of these checks.

Recounts the speaker's involvement in flood relief efforts in Kerala and the personal drive to contribute beyond official duties.

Expresses concern over the situation in Kashmir, particularly the stripping of rights and the lack of legal or constitutional process.

Introduces the concept of living in three phases: learning, doing, and sharing, which the speaker believes helps maintain a meaningful life.

Concludes with a parable about patience, emphasizing the importance of preparation over immediate results.

Ends with a message of gratitude and a wish for the audience's success.

Transcripts

first of all thank you for inviting me I

had not been going out and giving talks

for a while now and uh I'm not very used

to this format uh of being one-sided

coners know talk either it has always

been a call to action to do something or

a conversation uh that is where there is

a two-sided way of

communication to begin with there's an

interesting introduction which it said

is a former IAS

officer but I would

rather describe myself right now as a

resignation

aspirant it has been 4 and a half years

resignation is still not accepted so so

I think it takes around couple of years

to get in but it's been a longer time to

get out uh so that's that's my current

status

and I won't be able to tell you how to

succeed how to be an

achiever how to what to do what not to

do it's very difficult for me because

I'm myself figuring things out all the

while throughout my journey what I have

been conscious about is to be true to

oneself and true to your own

thoughts the hypocrisy between your own

thoughts and your own action is the

worst kind of

hypocrisy your own words and your own

thoughts

your own actions and your own

thoughts I think at least that

part I am trying to be honest to myself

and my thoughts and my

conss mirror mirror actually uh Kanika

was asking that what are you going to

say so I said I also don't know what to

say she said just talk talk about your

journey or what do you see when you see

a mirror of course all that I see aging

hairs you know gray hairs and nothing

more it's slowly increasing

and also a

question that you know you have taken

decisions in your life without worrying

about

consequences and that I think is

Possible only if you

believe in your country in your

institutions of this country and your

own society that courage is not a

courage that is a

privilege and we should be I believe

should be guarding that privilege all

the time not for us but for our future

Generations I started in like in any

normal household study well that's the

only motto right study well get a job

study well get a job studied well did

engineering got a job and then I

realized something was missing uh that's

not the end of what I wanted to be then

we started we saw there are kids who are

uh you know coming to the rack pick

essentially rack Pickers and we started

engaging with them we started teaching

them while we were working in a in a

semiconductor sector in the engineering

sector we started teaching them every

day in fact once in a week and then we

realized after every week we teach

something we are feeling satisfied but

they are not learning anything because

you go back and then you come back there

we are again starting with ABCD so we

are happy of doing something great but

at the same time the result of that was

very minimal so there was this question

can we teach every day without private

work said okay let's do so we started

teaching every day day and that's where

in fact I met my wife now wife of course

then I wanted her to be my wife when we

started that that's in Delhi actually

NOA sector 15 16 that area and then we

moved to ATA Market there we see a lot

of kids come and say that you know so we

started teaching there and when we

started teaching out there that's when

it realized or dawned on her that maybe

we are trying to do too many things by

being outside the system let us get into

the system right if you want to change

things you should get into the system so

she joined a C Service Institute and I

thought like we had just got

married and if she's now going to a

coaching Institute like where do we get

to spend our time together I thought

okay maybe I'll also join coaching

Institute at least dating can continue

inside the coaching

Institute so I said that to her and I

joined and uh the funny thing is I took

study seriously and she took dating

seriously and so I landed up in

I and she said one of us has to be in

the private sector the more wisest

decision ever for our family right one

of us has to be in the outside the

government so she remained outside the

government I end ended up in the is but

one thing I learned during that uh small

teaching period there we we teaching

small

kids and of course we putting from our

side some 500 bucks every month getting

the books everything and going there

once these five five kids were there

they stood up and asked so you must be

getting a lot of money you coming from

this NGO right you must be getting a lot

of money but you are not giving anything

to us you're just coming here and

teaching and going so tell us the truth

where is the money going there small

kids very small kids I got hurt I said

like you are I'm putting my effort I'm

putting money I'm doing everything for

them and then they are asking

questioning my Integrity how can that

happen so I called up himani my

wife and I told her that I stop this I

can't do this anymore this is not

my I I don't want to be like Fel feeling

bad after this then she asked like why

did you go there in the first place so I

said because I think there is a need to

teach there is a need for education to

be imparted there then the second

question was do you think that need has

changed so I said no then why are you

saying you're

stopping and I said maybe because I'm

hurt so at that point I realized I kept

my ego or my

self-respect above the public service

the service aspect of it that as long as

my ego was being satisfied the service

aspect was fine but if the service is

kind of hurting my ego I can't do it and

then I framed a thing because for me my

ego and my self PR is very important but

I said okay my personal benefit comes

here next comes the ego and the self

resect part and then comes the Public

Service part so if there is any time a

question between service for others

right anything that can good can happen

to others and your own ego I told myself

that I should choose this good of the

others not my ego but if it is your own

good if somebody ask okay come and maybe

sit here for 5 minutes and you'll get

good things then I would always choose

my self-respect on my ego so this

Clarity I got during that period then of

course I was there here in Delhi for

some time then in missam and for me it

was

clear bureaucracy or government meant

only one

thing that is to empower or enhance the

freedoms and the rights of the citizens

nothing

else if each person in

India gets his or her due position as a

citizen I'm 100% sure India will get its

position in the world state St if each

citizen gets his or her position in this

country proper equal citizen so that

part was clear that this is what I want

to do if at all anything that I want to

be contribution in part of the system

this is what I would like to be and this

was during the UPS interview also these

are my answers and especially when I

went to muram so I learned a little bit

of Miz there are a lot of stories from

misam but one thing that I don't know

many of you may know or may not know is

that we had a long Insurgency period in

misso

and we have bombed we have had brutal

incidents of anti-insurgency operations

in Missour one of the tasks there as a

collector was that you go and assess uh

what was the area that Army occupied

during that period and you pay

compensation to those uh the people who

are there whose land was to occupied

none of them had papers because most of

the villages were burned and uh

repopulated or re settled on along the

highways right many of us may not know

the story because it is not covered then

at this point of time we are going and

I'm talking to people so there was one

one lady who came up and said you know

like she showed some part of a body and

said is there any compensation that I

can get and that is not a that was not a

rhetorical or a question that is a very

honest question that can we at least get

some money for what happened to me

because she she didn't own any

land so I told out of my navity or out

of my confidence in my own country my

own constittution tion my own uh

institutions that this happened in the

80s or '

70s this will not happen this blatant

violation of

Rights will not happen in the India of

2000s and 2010s and 20s I had that

confidence I believed in it and that is

why you chose to be part of the system

right you will be enable to empower and

enhance and then I realized why the rest

of the country doesn't know about it

because the

institutions did not respond to the

actions of the government governments

generally have have an overarching

tendency now to accumulate more and more

power every government any place any

time how is it checked it's checked

through various other institutions that

are put in

place when those institutions fail then

only one thing remains that greed and

thirst for more and more power from the

government

to control every aspects of the life and

it is very natural tendency it's not a

bad or good tendency it's a very natural

tendency so of course mam we did a lot

of things we could you know n number of

things one of the things that you

mentioned that I went uh to Kerala and

uh did the flood relief part that was

when I was in dadra nagari we were doing

coordinating a lot of relief operations

it was an industrial areas we were able

to put a lot of medicines everything but

then I also felt I need to do something

by myself you know as an indiv indidual

not as a collector but as an individual

can I contribute in some way and since

you come from a background where you

have contributed in many ways as an as

an NGO Etc so I said okay let me go and

do it the funny thing is one of the

enquiry that is going on right now is

that I did not submit the two report for

the flood relief work that I did in 2018

fledge when what happened there are two

people here I think today who had lot of

things to add on to especially when it

comes to Kashmir what happened for me it

was not about 370 what exactly was done

with 370 no for me that what happened

afterwards or how it was

implemented that was an explicit

statement that state or the government

can take away the rights of the people

without any legal or constitutional

backing that a state can be made to put

like you know no communication no

Transportation no uh internet none of

that and and people be asked to choose

between do you have do you want the

right to life or do you want the right

to Liberty you choose between one of

them because it cannot coexist but it

always

coexists right to life is nothing

without right to

Liberty so we kind of said that this

point you have to choose and we chose

for you this is what it is and that's

okay that's governments have always had

the tendency to do it but then there are

institutions who always try to put a

check on it and when I felt

that that institutional check did not

happen one after the other then I felt

something needs to be spoken right so I

have uh tried to put my life in a very

different way that I should either be in

one of the three

phases either it should be in a learn

phase that you're learning something or

a do phase that you're doing something

or share phase you're sharing something

as long as you're in one of these phases

I don't feel bad about myself but when

I'm not in any of this like I'm not

either learning anything I'm not doing

anything and I'm not sharing anything if

I'm not in any of these faes then I feel

very uncomfortable then I feel that

mirror question comes the introspection

question comes okay what am I doing with

my life right and I always try to put it

in the learn do and share phases of my

life and I believe that is help me in

good stad I end my talk with a one small

story it's about patience and nothing

else there is a young graduate you can

say and he studied he passed out a lot

of Dreams tremendous amount of

dreams but nothing is happening for him

nothing is working out right then he

goes to a guru and tells the guru like

guruji I don't know what to do with my

life nothing is going nothing is

happening I have lot of

Dreams so Guru says okay before I answer

the question can you go and boil a glass

of water and give it to me from the

kitchen he goes he goes and sees that

there's a huge tumbler a huge tumbler

and it's full of water and it's a small

Tula very small one and there are no

firewood wood sticks there so he goes to

collect a few comes back starts to burn

but by the time it starts it's almost

the wood firewoods are over he'll have

to go back then he decides to spend four

to 5 hours in just collecting the

firewood from the neighboring Forest

comes

back then he boils the water the whole

tumbler after that he gives a boiled one

glass of boiled water to the guru so he

said Guru said I asked you for one glass

of boiled water how did it take you so

much

time so the student says I had two

options either I throw away the rest of

the water and only keep one glass I

could have given you

immediately or I collect enough firewood

so that I can boil the entire water and

give one glass of it from you I chose

the second

one so then the guru

says you did you get your

answer so he said yes I

did but remember one thing the guru adds

when you are collecting your firewood

don't keep checking the temperature of

the water when you are preparing for

something don't start looking at whether

the results have started coming or not

as long as you are doing the preparation

part as long as you collecting the

firewood don't worry about whether water

is heating or not and I wish you all the

very best uh thank you once again for

inviting me thank you