True gender equality is when both women and men have a voice | Deepika Bharadwaj | TEDxGatewayWomen
Summary
TLDRThe video script addresses the issue of gender inequality in legal systems, focusing on the misuse of laws designed to protect women, such as Section 498A of the Indian Penal Code. It highlights the tragic story of Aadesh Yadav, a man driven to suicide due to false accusations and legal pressures. The speaker emphasizes that while laws protect women, there are no such safeguards for men facing false charges. The documentary 'Martyrs of Marriage' aims to shed light on these cases, advocating for true gender equality where both men and women are heard and protected.
Takeaways
- 😔 Aadesh Yadav, a young man, tragically took his life after facing false dowry allegations and molestation charges against his family.
- 😢 His suicide note expressed sorrow for his family’s suffering and highlighted how biased laws can turn a man into a criminal based solely on a woman's statement.
- 📰 The speaker emphasizes that such cases of men suffering due to false domestic violence and dowry accusations rarely make national headlines.
- 💔 There is a lack of legal recognition for unnatural deaths of husbands, unlike dowry deaths of women, which are acknowledged by law.
- 🚨 False cases, such as the gang rape accusation against Prashant Sablani and Milind Kap, result in severe consequences for innocent men, with no legal recourse against the false accusers.
- 😡 The speaker calls for legal reforms to prevent the misuse of laws intended to protect women, as they are currently being used to extort money or harm men unjustly.
- ⚖️ The speaker urges for equality in laws, highlighting that men lack protections similar to women in cases of domestic violence, mental or physical cruelty, and adultery.
- 📞 Men in distress have limited support systems, as most helplines cater exclusively to women, leaving men without legal or emotional assistance.
- 🎥 The speaker created the documentary 'Martyrs of Marriage' to raise awareness about men fighting false legal cases in marriage, some of whom have succumbed to the pressures.
- 🤝 True gender equality, according to the speaker, means that both men and women should be heard and have legal recourse against injustice, irrespective of gender.
Q & A
What event does the speaker reference at the beginning of the transcript?
-The speaker references the suicide of a young man named Aadesh Yadav, which occurred on February 27, 2015.
What led to Aadesh Yadav’s suicide according to the speaker?
-Aadesh Yadav's suicide was a result of being implicated in a false dowry case by his wife, who also accused his family of molestation. The stress of these accusations, his father's heart attack, and his inability to resolve the situation led to his death.
What is the key issue that the speaker highlights regarding gender laws in India?
-The speaker highlights the issue of gender bias in India's legal system, specifically how men can be falsely accused in cases of dowry, rape, and domestic violence, with little legal recourse or protection for them.
What does the speaker say about the consequences of misuse of Section 498A of the Indian Penal Code?
-The speaker argues that the misuse of Section 498A, which is meant to protect women from dowry harassment, has led to 'legal terrorism,' where men and their families are falsely implicated in dowry cases, leading to their ruin.
What case is mentioned to illustrate the problem of false rape accusations?
-The speaker mentions the case of Prashant Sablani and Milan Kap, who were falsely accused of gang raping a friend in 2012. Despite having no evidence against them, they spent over 14 months in jail before being acquitted.
What legal disparity does the speaker emphasize in terms of domestic violence laws?
-The speaker emphasizes that domestic violence laws in India allow women to file criminal cases against men for mental or physical cruelty, but men do not have the same legal protections to file such cases against women.
What project did the speaker initiate to address the issue of false accusations against men?
-The speaker started a project called 'Martyrs of Marriage,' which is a documentary film that shares the stories of men who have been falsely accused and suffered due to the misuse of marriage-related laws.
What is the speaker’s view on true gender equality?
-The speaker believes that true gender equality means that both men and women should have a voice and be heard. Laws should protect both genders from injustice without bias.
How does the speaker describe the emotional toll on men accused of false cases?
-The speaker describes that men who are falsely accused often experience emotional trauma, loss of self-respect, dignity, and careers. They may even be driven to suicide due to the overwhelming pressure.
What legal reforms does the speaker suggest in the context of false accusations?
-The speaker suggests that laws should include safeguards to prevent their misuse and ensure that both men and women receive justice. There should be deterrents against filing false cases, and the legal system should recognize when men are victims of abuse.
Outlines
💔 Aadesh Yadav's Tragic Suicide Due to False Dowry Accusations
The paragraph describes the tragic suicide of Aadesh Yadav, a young man from India, who took his life after facing false dowry accusations from his wife. Aadesh’s family was subjected to harassment, including a molestation case against his brother and father. His father’s heart attack, followed by Aadesh's suicide, highlights the immense pressure they faced. Aadesh left a suicide note questioning the legal system's bias and asking for justice for his family. The paragraph also reflects on how false dowry cases are driving men to suicide, and how the misuse of Section 498A of the Indian Penal Code is devastating families.
🧑⚖️ False Rape Accusations Ruining Lives of Innocent Men
This paragraph focuses on the case of Prashant and Milind, two men who were falsely accused of gang rape by a woman whose parents disapproved of her lifestyle. Despite their innocence, they were imprisoned and underwent a long criminal trial. The paragraph emphasizes the lack of accountability for false accusers and the damage caused to innocent men's lives. It also questions how society and laws can be so one-sided, prioritizing the protection of women while neglecting the injustices faced by men. The narrator reflects on meeting Milind’s mother, a widow, who spent her life savings fighting the case for her son.
⚖️ The Double Standard in Gender Laws
This paragraph brings attention to the societal and legal double standards that exist in cases of abuse and gender-related violence. It challenges the typical narrative of male perpetrators and female victims, asking readers to consider the perspective of men who are wrongfully accused. The narrator advocates for equal justice, urging the creation of laws that prevent the misuse of legal provisions meant for women's protection. She questions why men implicated in false cases have no recourse or support, despite having their lives and careers destroyed.
📞 Helplines for Men: A Growing Need
The narrator addresses the lack of support for men facing emotional and legal challenges, pointing out the absence of helplines and services for men in distress. Men in need of help are forced to call women's helplines, which are not equipped to handle their issues. The privately run helpline FIF gets thousands of calls from men every month but can only offer emotional support. The narrator explains that this realization prompted her to create a documentary called 'Martyrs of Marriage,' which highlights the struggles of men who face legal battles due to false accusations.
🎥 Trailer for 'Martyrs of Marriage' Documentary
This paragraph introduces the trailer for the documentary 'Martyrs of Marriage,' which tells the stories of men who have been falsely accused and suffered the consequences. The trailer shows clips of people sharing their traumatic experiences with unjust legal battles. It emphasizes how laws such as Section 498A of the IPC are being misused to extort money and gain an upper hand in marriages. The narrator concludes by expressing her belief in true equality, advocating for a system where both men and women are heard and treated justly.
Mindmap
Keywords
💡Suicide
💡Dowry Case
💡False Accusations
💡Section 498A
💡Gender Equality
💡Misuse of Law
💡Legal Terrorism
💡Injustice
💡Martyrs of Marriage
💡National Commission for Women
Highlights
Aadesh Yadav, a young man, committed suicide after being implicated in a false dowry case, and his family's property was demanded in exchange for dropping the case.
Aadesh's suicide note revealed the emotional torment he and his family experienced due to the false accusations, pleading for an investigation into their innocence.
Men in India are increasingly committing suicide due to false domestic violence and dowry accusations, leading to societal and familial pressures.
The misuse of Section 498A of the Indian Penal Code (anti-dowry law) is leading to a new form of 'legal terrorism' according to the Supreme Court of India.
The tragic case of Prashant and Milind, accused of gang rape by their own friend, reflects how false accusations can ruin lives, even when no evidence supports the claim.
Prashant and Milind were acquitted after spending 14 months in jail and enduring a 2.5-year-long trial, despite having proof of innocence.
No action was taken against the false accusers in the cases mentioned, highlighting a severe gap in the Indian legal system.
The speaker reflects on the broader issue of laws being biased, where men have no legal protection against domestic violence, false dowry, or sexual harassment cases.
The speaker emphasizes that justice should be gender-neutral, advocating for laws that serve as deterrents against misuse by either gender.
The documentary 'Martyrs of Marriage' was created to share the stories of men who have suffered, fought, or succumbed to false accusations, particularly in marital disputes.
India lacks official statistics on the unnatural deaths of husbands, which contrasts with the well-documented cases of dowry deaths among women.
Men are expected to 'move on' when a relationship ends, whereas women can file legal cases, including rape on the pretext of broken marriage promises.
In cases of false rape accusations, such allegations skew crime statistics, trivializing the seriousness of rape and inflating the crime graph.
There are no government helplines for men, and distress calls from men seeking support often end up at women's helplines, which cannot offer legal protection.
The speaker's belief in true equality is based on giving everyone—man or woman—a voice and ensuring everyone is heard in the pursuit of justice.
Transcripts
[Music]
on February 27
2015 I woke up to the news of suicide of
a young man in
Chi one among several such news stories
that I've been waking up to in the last
3
years I would usually find these new
stories only in Regional newspapers
because this and whatever I would talk
about today rarely makes a national
headline or a breaking
news so I inquired about this case and
got to know about
aadesh aadesh yadav a young bright
energetic hardworking Bank employee a
middleclass man with big dreams of
marriage spending life with his soulmate
like all of us too
unfortunately marriage became the
biggest mistake of his life and also the
reason for his
death in a three and a half page suicide
note a shares how he and his entire
family were implicated in a false Dy
case his wife demanded that his father's
property be transferred in her name to
settle the matter when they refused she
filed a molestation case on his brother
and
father his father suffered a heart
attack just few days later AES hanged
himself I would share a few lines from
his suide
note to all I request you to save my
family from this unexpected
problem to the National Human Rights
Commission to the National commission
for women please investigate if I or my
family was wrong
ever how can the law be so biased that
it turns a man into criminal merely on
statement of a
woman I thought a lot but found no
option mommy Papa I'm sorry please don't
cry as it would hurt me
more you may not know but aades is one
among several men in India who are
killing themselves
because of domestic violence false cases
of
dowy Demands of huge sums of money to
settle these matters leaving no option
but a suicide note to reclaim their
innocence to put it in perspective he
suffered misuse of section 498 of the
Indian Penal Code commonly known as the
anti- ACT you don't need to ask for doy
to be implicated in a dowy cas
case if this was a woman this death
would have perhaps been called a doy
death by law but unnatural deaths of
husbands are not recognized under the
law and thus we do not have any
statistics on June
2012 news of Amity gang rape case broke
in New
Delhi Prashant sablani Milan Kap
were accused of gang raping their own
friend in March
2015 a delot honorably acquitted both
these boys observing that the parents of
the woman pushed her into implicating
the accused because they did not like
that she got drunk with Prashant on day
of the alleged
crime though there was no what evid
whatsoever to the allegations even the
place of crime being
imaginary Prashant and Millan spent a
Haring 14 months in thar jail and
underwent a criminal trial for 2 and a
half years despite having every proof of
Innocence their bail was constantly
denied perhaps because at that time
India was reeling under the aftermaths
of the horrifying Nira gang and rape
case and in a sense did not matter if
you were a man and an
accused no action has been taken against
the false accusers in this case or in
several cases in India that are
happening
today I meant Milan's
mother she's a
widow she spent her life's saving in
fighting the case for her son though he
was not at fault
she is a
woman whenever a woman is abused we ask
what if she was your sister what if she
was your mother today I want to ask you
all what if aadesh was your
brother and you saw him dying every day
and eventually dead he was not at
mistake what if Prashant or milind were
your son your brother or just a
friend and no matter how much you cried
or of their innocence with evidential
proof you would not be
heard laws have been made for protection
of women should be what about a law that
serves as a deterrent so that these laws
are not
misused Justice should be served to
women but what about Justice to those
who are implicated in false cases their
lives ruined their careers lost their
self-respect dignity status
shattered asking money for doy is wrong
but is asking money after filing a false
case fine all
right
how is abuse of these Provisions that
have been made for a purpose helping the
cause of
women in sushil Kumar versus Union of
India on misuse of 49 AA Supreme Court
said by misuse of these Provisions a new
legal terrorism can be
unleashed the law was made to serve as a
shield and not assassin's
weapon if the Cry of wolf is made too
often as a prank assistance might not be
available when the actual wolf
appears parting away comments in a false
rape case filed by a woman in Delhi
Justice Wenda had said false rape cases
play Havoc with crime statistics shoot
up the crime Gruff and tend to
trivialize the offense of
rape these words in all these quotes are
from esteemed courts in India esteemed
people a lot of people misunderstand my
work as that which is against women it
is not it is against Injustice
I have suffered as a woman when I was a
sister when I was a daughter and I've
seen death very
closely you know in times when we are
talking about gender
equality in times when we are talking
about laws that should be made for
everybody though I am a woman and I
connect with pain of women I also
connect with pain of men
a gender that's not supposed to
cry a gender which is not supposed to
share their sufferings or
orals and I chose to talk about men
because when we are talking about laws
when we are talking about equality when
our constitution says that nobody should
be discriminated upon on basis of cast
Creed religion and
gender we have laws
where a wife can file a criminal case of
mental or physical cruelty but a husband
can't we have law of domestic violence
where a woman can seek protection citing
physical mental emotional Financial
sexual or verbal abuse but a man
can't we have laws of adultery that
immunes a married woman from any
criminal prosecution so a husband cannot
do anything in that situation
all that a married man can do today is
file a case of divorce and grounds of
Cruelty and even when he does that no
matter how much he's tortured or abused
or he's on the verge of committing
suicide when he does file a case of
divorce he can get several criminal
cases on him so he turns from a victim
to a
perpetuator we have laws for rape sexual
harassment at workplace word gesture or
act that insults the Dignity of a woman
but these laws do not consider men as
victims there are several cases that
have come across now where if a man
breaks up from a
relationship a woman can go ahead and
file a case of rape and promise of
marriage whether a promise was made or
not made but if a woman breaks up from a
relationship a man is expected to just
move on
when I became open to and aware to this
Injustice that is happening when I got
to know that while we have several
government helplines for everybody but
not for men so what is happening these
days is men who are in distress end up
calling up women's helpl line and they
do not have any support for
them there are several reports to that
account now that have come in newspapers
some say that 24% of those calls are on
women helpline are for men the only
privately run helpline for
men fif one gets thousands of calls
every month and all that the counselors
can do is provide emotional support
because there aren't any laws and there
isn't any
protection so when I became open to
aware and aware to this Injustice I
thought that I would not be silent and
speak up and that is when I decided to
start a project called martys of
marriage it's a documentary film that
shares stories of those who have fought
who are fighting who have won and some
who have succumbed to the most
unexpected Battle of their life called
marriage here's a small trailer of that
film
[Music]
he's not there he was more than a
brother to me it was 9:15 in the night
when we were arrested I was sent to
jail without even being asked a single
[Music]
question is
[Music]
these provisions of IPC not only being
misused but they are grossly misused
this is a tool which has been used only
to extort money to make a better deal
from the marriage if after many years we
notice that the law is being GR cly
abused whether it is 498a or whether it
is even 376 or
whatever it is incumbent Upon A
responsive government to rise up to the
challenge and to address the problem
[Music]
[Applause]
just like you don't need to be a woman
to fight for wom you don't need to be a
man to fight for
men a lot of men in past and today have
taken a stand against Injustice and
women I have taken a stand against
Injustice and
Men my
belief true equality
equality where everyone has a voice be
it woman or a man and everyone is heard
be it a woman or a man thank you
[Music]
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