How to tell if you’re trans

Summary

In this video, Summer Iy and Bol discuss the introspective journey of self-discovery, particularly focusing on recognizing and accepting one's transgender identity. They touch on the importance of listening to one's inner voice and the personal struggle with acceptance. Summer shares her own experiences, from initial confusion to a swift commitment to her identity, contrasting with Bol's slower, more exploratory path. The video encourages viewers to embrace their authentic selves, highlighting the transformative power of self-acceptance and the community's support in navigating the complexities of gender identity.

Takeaways

• 😀 The video discusses the journey of self-discovery and acceptance for transgender individuals.
• 🤔 It emphasizes that the question isn't 'how do I know I'm trans?' but rather 'can I accept this?'
• 🧐 The speaker suggests that questioning one's identity is a normal part of the process and doesn't necessarily confirm one's transgender status.
• 🌟 The video acknowledges that everyone's journey of self-discovery is unique, with some finding clarity quickly and others taking longer.
• 📚 Research and self-reflection play a significant role in understanding one's gender identity.
• 🕰 The speaker shares personal experiences, including the realization that they were trans after years of not knowing.
• 💔 The struggle with expressing one's true self, especially during lockdown, can lead to negative self-perceptions and emotional pain.
• 💡 A moment of clarity, such as a thought about body dysphoria, can be a pivotal point in accepting one's transgender identity.
• 💪 The video encourages viewers to embrace the process, even if it's scary, and to take steps towards living authentically.
• 🌈 It highlights the joy of normalization, where aspects of one's identity become a natural part of life, allowing focus on other personal goals and relationships.

Q & A

What is the main topic of the video?

The main topic of the video is about self-discovery and acceptance, particularly for individuals questioning their gender identity and considering whether they might be transgender.

Why does the speaker mention 'check nerds' in the video?

The term 'check nerds' is used humorously to refer to people who are introspective or analytical about their identity, possibly overthinking or seeking validation or answers through external means like online communities.

What does the speaker suggest about the process of realizing one's transgender identity?

The speaker suggests that realizing one's transgender identity is a personal journey that varies for everyone. It's not just about knowing but also about accepting oneself, which can be a long and complex process.

Why does the speaker mention that even researching gender identity doesn't necessarily mean one is transgender?

The speaker points out that researching gender identity is a natural part of questioning one's identity, but it doesn't confirm that someone is transgender. It's okay to explore and question without being definitive about one's identity.

What is the significance of the speaker's mention of 'eggs' in the context of the video?

The term 'eggs' refers to individuals who are in a denial phase of their transgender identity,比喻那些尚未准备好接受或公开自己跨性别身份的人。The speaker uses this term to illustrate the different stages and mindsets people go through in their journey of self-discovery.

How does the speaker describe their own journey of discovering their transgender identity?

The speaker describes their journey as a quick realization after years of not understanding their gender identity. They found a sense of relief and recognition in learning about transgender experiences and quickly committed to their identity.

What advice does the speaker give to those who are unsure about starting hormone replacement therapy (HRT)?

The speaker advises that it's okay to be unsure and scared about starting HRT. They suggest considering the potential benefits and the fact that life is a one-time journey, encouraging individuals to embrace the possibility of change.

Why does the speaker mention the importance of normalization in the context of being transgender?

The speaker emphasizes the importance of normalization because it signifies a point where one's transgender identity becomes a natural part of their life, allowing them to focus on other aspects of life and personal growth.

What is the significance of the speaker's mention of an upcoming event at MCM?

The mention of the MCM event is a personal touch where the speaker invites viewers to meet them, indicating a level of openness and community engagement. It also serves as a way to connect with the audience on a more personal level.

How does the speaker address the fear and anxiety associated with the process of self-discovery and acceptance?

The speaker acknowledges the fear and anxiety associated with self-discovery and acceptance by sharing their own experiences and thoughts. They encourage viewers to embrace the process, suggesting that it's a part of life and that it's okay to feel uncertain.

Outlines

00:00

🌈 Exploring Trans Identity and Acceptance

In this paragraph, Summer discusses the process of discovering and accepting one's transgender identity. They mention that people often ask how they know they are trans, and Summer suggests that there's an inner voice that already knows, but the challenge lies in accepting it. They emphasize that it's normal to question one's identity and that everyone's journey is different. Summer shares their own experience of quickly realizing they were trans after years of not understanding what it meant, contrasting it with their partner's slower and more confusing journey. They also touch on the importance of not letting fear hold you back from exploring your identity and the relief that comes from living authentically.

05:02

💉 The Significance of HRT and Embracing Change

Summer continues the conversation by delving into the decision-making process regarding hormone replacement therapy (HRT) and the fear that can accompany such a significant life change. They recount a moment of clarity where they realized the importance of pursuing their true self, even if it meant making a mistake. The paragraph highlights the signs that can indicate one's trans identity and the relief that comes from embracing it. Summer also talks about the process of learning to adapt to a new identity, including voice training and personal style, and the joy of reaching a point where one's identity becomes normalized. They end with an invitation to a meet and greet at MCM, expressing hope that the video helps viewers in their own journeys of self-discovery.

Keywords

💡Transgender

Transgender refers to individuals whose gender identity differs from the sex they were assigned at birth. In the video, the term is central as the speaker discusses their journey of self-discovery and acceptance as a transgender person. The speaker mentions that they spent years without understanding what being trans meant, highlighting the importance of personal exploration and acceptance.

💡Identity

Identity in this context refers to a person's sense of self, including their gender, which can be a complex and evolving aspect of an individual's life. The video emphasizes the importance of questioning and understanding one's identity, as the speaker did, leading to a realization and acceptance of their transgender identity.

💡Acceptance

Acceptance here denotes the process of acknowledging and embracing one's true self, which for the speaker includes their transgender identity. The video discusses the challenges of acceptance, suggesting that it's not just about knowing one's identity but also being willing to live in accordance with it.

💡Cisgender

Cisgender is a term used to describe individuals whose gender identity matches the sex they were assigned at birth. The video script contrasts the experiences of cisgender individuals with those who are transgender, noting that cisgender people typically do not question their gender identity in the same way.

💡Crossdressing

Crossdressing is the act of wearing clothes typically associated with the opposite gender. In the video, the speaker's partner is mentioned to have experimented with crossdressing, which is presented as a step in their journey towards understanding and expressing their gender identity.

💡Denial Phase

The denial phase, as used in the context of the video, refers to a stage where an individual might be in denial about their transgender identity. The speaker uses the term 'egg' from the subreddit r/eggIRL to describe this phase, indicating a time when they were within their 'shell' and not yet ready to fully embrace their identity.

💡HRT (Hormone Replacement Therapy)

HRT is a medical treatment that involves taking hormones to help align one's physical appearance with their gender identity. The video discusses the speaker's contemplation of HRT, reflecting on the significance of the decision and its potential impact on their life.

💡Authentic Self

Authentic self refers to the true, inherent identity of a person, which may not align with societal expectations or the gender assigned at birth. The video encourages viewers to embrace their authentic self, suggesting that living authentically can lead to a more fulfilling and normalized life.

💡Disassociation

Disassociation in this context is a psychological phenomenon where an individual feels disconnected from their body or identity. The speaker mentions experiencing disassociation when looking at themselves in the mirror, which was a clue to their gender identity struggles.

💡Normalize

To normalize, in the context of the video, means to make something a regular and accepted part of one's life. The speaker talks about the joy of reaching a point where aspects of their gender expression, such as clothing and makeup, become normalized and no longer a source of discomfort or confusion.

💡Indoctrination

Indoctrination in this video script is used humorously to refer to the process of educating or persuading someone about a particular belief or idea, in this case, the acceptance and understanding of one's transgender identity. The speaker playfully suggests that they are 'indoctrinating' viewers to consider and accept their own identities.

Highlights

Summer discusses the introspective journey of understanding one's gender identity and the acceptance of being transgender.

The video addresses the common question of how individuals come to realize their transgender identity.

Summer shares that there is often an internal voice that hints at one's transgender identity, but acceptance is the key.

The video emphasizes that questioning one's identity is a normal part of the self-discovery process.

Summer points out that the journey to self-discovery is unique for everyone, with different paces and complexities.

The video mentions that even researching transgender topics can indicate a level of curiosity and self-exploration.

Summer's partner, Finn, is used as an example to illustrate different paces of self-discovery within a relationship.

The concept of 'eggs' in the transgender community is explained, referring to individuals in a phase of denial or early exploration.

Summer's personal experience with crossdressing during lockdown and its impact on her self-realization is shared.

The importance of not letting fear hold you back from exploring your gender identity is highlighted.

Summer talks about the struggle of not being able to express her gender identity while living at home during lockdown.

The video discusses the negative thoughts and self-hatred that can arise from suppressing one's true identity.

Summer shares her thought process leading to the decision to pursue HRT (hormone replacement therapy).

The video encourages viewers to embrace the process of self-discovery, even if it feels uncomfortable or 'cringe'.

Summer provides reassurance that there is a lifetime to figure out one's identity after accepting being transgender.

The video ends with an invitation to a meet and greet event where Summer and Finn will be present.

Summer concludes with a message of hope, emphasizing the normalization and joy that comes with living authentically.

Transcripts

hello hi I'm summer iy you can tell by

my summer haircut me and the homie are

here me and Bol are here to make content

this video is about check nerds how do I

know that I'm trans how do you know that

you are trans how does anybody know it's

easy don't worry your girlfriend will

tell

you people used to ask me a lot online

because you know I've been on I've been

an Instagram person for for a while now

and I do a lot of ask question boxes cuz

I think they're fun and people would

always ask me like how do you know I

think that you already know I think

there is a little voice in the back of

your head that's telling you and you

already know that's why you're doing

this and I think it isn't a question of

how do I know it's more a question of

can I accept this I think even

researching this like I don't know any

CIS people that have done this kind of

research or have asked these kind of

questions about their identity I think

even having the thought bumps you up a

couple of percentage points but it does

not mean that you are because it's

completely okay to question yourself and

your identity the journey is different

for everybody somebody who is very

confident in the knowledge that they are

trans and they discover it very quickly

and they like find themselves and they

do not ever look back does not take away

from somebody who has a very confusing

very long-winded Journey th is that a

word does not take away from somebody

who was a long-winded Journey where they

do not figure anything out and they do

not know themselves very

well Finster genuinely you can take me

and Finn as an example of this I

discovered myself quite quickly I say

quickly I spent about 23 years of my

life not knowing what being trans is or

what a transgender person is or does or

thinks about but once I kind of got the

brainworms about it and did some

research and was like oh this sounds

kind of like my dream life I very

quickly committed I I was a very

committed woman I went the whole way fer

my my partner they they spent like a

billion years streaming crossdressing

and it barely scratched the surface of

what they understand about themselves

which is very very little which is

obviously completely okay you canot be

sure you know you kind of have to figure

stuff

[Music]

out time for iyw

[Music]

I spent a lot of time not understanding

my my gender not understanding myself in

social situations not feeling

comfortable in my body or my life or

anything really and I never questioned

it I thought it was very normal I

thought it was normal to disassociate

when you look at yourself for too long

in a mirror that's not normal I missed a

lot of Clues because they're a lot

easier to look at retroactively I was

dating somebody at the time and they

proposed to me that maybe I'm trans and

I kind of was like well I don't know

what that is I'm going to look into it

and I'd already started I guess

crossdressing like in private during

lockdown I was figuring stuff out and

I'd also already started doing like only

fans so I was advertising on like Reddit

and stuff I stumbled across like egg IRL

which is a subreddit where people who

are eggs which means when your trans

it's it's like a denial phase you are

within your shell you are safe you've

all seen Finster you know what an egg is

it started with like wow these memes are

not relatable but they're a little bit

funny and then it was like oh wait that

that one hits I'm like oh wait this is

my brain you're just writing down words

from my brain in a funny meme format and

I continued to felt personally attacked

I learned kind of what it is to be trans

from there I saw like trans timelines

and like wow that person like looks

incredible in such a short amount of

time that that's crazy that can't be

real so I did a bunch of research I

looked into it different types all this

stuff and I was like okay this is slowly

seeming more like something I'm

experiencing and still I was not

convinced because you can read yourself

to a tea and still not think you're a

part of that group because it's scary

and it's a huge change and all the

social aspects to it are kind of a

little bit terrifying I was in lockdown

during Co

like a lot of us were a lot of trans

people were born during those like hours

in lockdown where you had to really sip

with your thoughts and I had to leave my

student accommodation to go live at home

and then because I was going to live at

home I could not freely express myself I

could not dress up I could not try

makeup and that really hit and it hurt

so bad way more than I thought it ever

would I started to wake up with like

really horrible thoughts about myself

where I like hated my body and I hated

my face I hated how I looked and I hated

my life I caught a thought as it went

through my brain and I I was like okay

yeah that that means that I was very

unsure if I wanted this and I was very

unsure if I should go on HRT and then I

had a quick thought in the mirror it

like you know flew past in my brain and

I I snatched it out of the air and was

like this is more important than I'm

giving it credit I thought what even if

I decide to take the HRT and I am wrong

if I am not a woman and I've taken this

drug at least I'll have a female

[Music]

body if you're thinking at least you

know I'll be recognize this female at

least I'll be closer at least I'll you

know have I'll get to wear female

clothes those are all signs and it works

obviously the other way if I take

testosterone at least I'll have a m body

you know it's a big sign it's not

worth putting your life completely on

hold because you're scared you only get

one you only get one go so you may as

well you know embrace the cringe for a

little bit or pink outfits have to do

the voice training which you know it can

be easy if you just kind of do it the

icky way of just like learning one

technique and then sticking with it for

enough hours in your life that it

becomes permanent and you'll get there

you'll get to the other side you'll

learn how to dress you'll learn makeup

all that stuff just takes time but

here's the good thing if you

decide okay I'm trans you have the rest

of your life to figure all that stuff

out you will be living as you

authentically for the rest of your life

you will have a bunch of moments where

you realize F like this is great and I'm

glad I did it and one of the best Joys

is when all of it is completely

normalized when your clothes are just

clothes when your makeup is just

something you do to look nice when your

boobs are just there you know everything

becomes easy and normalized and that's

where all the best parts of life come

from when you can start focusing on

other things you can get healthier you

can go find that dream job you've been

after you can date and be in an

enriching relationship cuz you became a

person anyway that's my indoctrination

for this week maybe I'll try and

indoctrinate you some more next week but

thank you for watching I hope this

helped you figure something anything out

a little bit maybe go check out the sub

writers that I mentioned and see if they

twig anything in your brain or just

accept that you know if you've watched

this video all the way to

here it's at least

7030 that you are also on Saturday of

this week if you are watching it right

now as it is released I will be at MCM

with Finn the 25th of May Saturday 3:30

till 6 :30 I will be in a meet and greet

zone so we can meet or we can greet or

we can meet and greet and photos and

signing and and I don't know just just

you know ask me to tell you a story of

Yonder please come because it'll be

really embarrassing if nobody turns

up

bye okay I just want to say this is the

goal this there's some artwork here bags

this is the goal but if you have noticed

there is an echo and it sounds bad so

I'm going to move from this room this

this is where we'll end up there

[Music]