The Shadow: Become Who You're Afraid To Be
Summary
TLDRBertrand, an introverted man with a troubled past, moves to a secluded cottage in the Scottish Lowlands seeking peace. However, he is haunted by a mysterious monster in his basement. After fruitless attempts to fight it with various weapons and an elixir for pain, he follows the advice of a wise shopkeeper to communicate with the creature, leading to an unexpected invitation for dialogue.
Takeaways
- 🏡 Bertrand moves to a secluded cottage in the Scottish Lowlands seeking solitude and an escape from his troubled past.
- 👦 Bertrand's childhood was marked by rambunctious behavior and a strict, abusive upbringing that instilled a deep-seated aversion to people.
- 🏭 As an adult, Bertrand's life in the city was filled with exploitation at work and isolation in his personal life, leading to a growing desire for change.
- 🌌 His new home in the countryside offered the peace and quiet he craved, but it was not without its own mysterious disturbances.
- 👂 Bertrand's first night in the cottage was interrupted by unexplained thudding sounds, sparking fear and curiosity.
- 🔦 Upon investigating, Bertrand discovers a hidden hatch in the basement, which unleashes a monstrous entity and shatters his newfound peace.
- 🛡 In response to the apparition, Bertrand repeatedly attempts to confront and defeat the monster using various weapons, all to no avail.
- 💊 He also resorts to a 'Numbing Elixir' to cope with the pain and fear, which only leads to further dependency and disarray in his life.
- 🤔 The shopkeeper suggests that Bertrand consider the monster's wants and needs, proposing dialogue as a potential solution.
- 🗣️ Bertrand finally decides to communicate with the monster, inviting it upstairs for a conversation, signifying a shift from conflict to understanding.
- 🤝 The story concludes with the possibility of coexistence and mutual respect between Bertrand and the monster, emphasizing the power of empathy and communication.
Q & A
Why did Bertrand move to the countryside cottage?
-Bertrand moved to the countryside cottage because he didn't like people and often felt exhausted by them. He sought seclusion and peace away from the city and its noise.
What was Bertrand's childhood like?
-Bertrand's childhood was marked by rambunctious behavior, curiosity, and a tendency to challenge local boys to fights. He was often in trouble due to his strict and abusive father and a passively complicit mother.
What was Bertrand's experience like at school and church?
-Bertrand's experience at school and church was not much better than his home life. He felt that figures like his father were present everywhere, and people were mostly reminders that he needed to conform to others' expectations.
How did Bertrand's life change after secondary school?
-After secondary school, Bertrand enrolled in a shipbuilding program and later worked for a major ship manufacturer in the city. However, he faced an awful boss and coworkers who took advantage of him.
Why did Bertrand feel trapped in his neighborhood and city?
-Bertrand felt trapped due to the noise and activity of the city, which constantly bothered him. The sounds of the world seemed to bang against his small one-bedroom home, making him feel confined and restless.
What was Bertrand's initial reaction to the mysterious thud he heard in his new home?
-Bertrand initially felt a wave of fear and anxiety, which caused him to frantically search his house for the source of the sound. When he found nothing, he attributed the noise to his imagination.
What did Bertrand discover in the basement that led to the appearance of the monster?
-Bertrand discovered a small wooden hatch on the ground in the basement. When he opened it, a plume of black smoke and fragments of light emerged, followed by the appearance of the monster.
How did Bertrand attempt to deal with the monster initially?
-Bertrand initially attempted to fight the monster using various weapons he purchased from the general store. However, none of his attempts were successful, and the monster seemed unaffected.
What was the effect of the Numbing Elixir on Bertrand?
-The Numbing Elixir made Bertrand feel numb, warm, calm, and blissful, disconnecting him from his body and the terror of the monster. However, it also impaired his balance, focus, and aim, making his attempts to fight the monster even less effective.
What advice did the shopkeeper give Bertrand regarding the monster?
-The shopkeeper suggested that Bertrand try talking to the monster, empathizing with it, and finding common ground. He advised Bertrand to accept the monster's presence and consider compromising with it.
What was the outcome of Bertrand's decision to communicate with the monster?
-When Bertrand decided to communicate with the monster, he invited it upstairs to talk. The monster agreed, indicating a potential shift from conflict to understanding and coexistence.
Outlines
🏡 Bertrand's Escape to Solitude
Bertrand, an introverted individual with a troubled past, moves to a secluded cottage in the Scottish Lowlands to escape the pressures of society. Having grown up in a strict and abusive household, and later enduring an exploitative work environment, Bertrand seeks peace and the freedom to pursue his passion for shipbuilding. His new home is a simple, mid-sized cottage, far from the nearest town and any signs of human presence, offering him the isolation he craves.
👹 Encounter with the Unseen
On his first night in the cottage, Bertrand is startled by a mysterious thud, which he initially dismisses as a figment of his imagination. However, the sound persists, leading him to investigate his home, including the basement. There, he discovers a hidden hatch, and upon opening it, is confronted by a burst of black smoke and light, revealing a monstrous entity. Shocked and terrified, Bertrand flees his home, only to return the next day armed with a weapon, determined to confront the creature.
🗡 Bertrand's Fruitless Fights
Bertrand's attempts to fight the monster prove futile, as it effortlessly evades his attacks with various weapons, including a sword and a flail. Each morning, he is found by a shopkeeper, to whom he returns seeking more powerful weapons. Bertrand's life becomes a cycle of fighting, fleeing, and seeking new means to combat the creature. His home becomes cluttered with weapons and elixirs, and his life is consumed by his obsession with defeating the monster.
💬 The Path to Communication
After numerous failed attempts and a growing sense of defeat, Bertrand consults the shopkeeper, who suggests that he try talking to the monster instead of fighting it. The old man's advice prompts Bertrand to reconsider his approach. He returns home, opens the hatch without any weapons or elixirs, and invites the monster to come upstairs for a conversation. This marks a significant shift in Bertrand's strategy, moving from confrontation to communication.
Mindmap
Keywords
💡Isolation
💡Abuse
💡Self-Reliance
💡Fear
💡Monster
💡Weapon
💡Elixir
💡Communication
💡Empathy
💡Compromise
Highlights
Bertrand's move to the Scottish Lowlands for solitude and a new life in shipbuilding.
Bertrand's childhood characterized by rambunctious behavior and strict parental discipline.
Bertrand's struggle with societal expectations and the desire to be someone else.
Bertrand's challenging experiences at work with an exploitative boss and coworkers.
Bertrand's feelings of isolation and anger in his old neighborhood.
Bertrand's initial encounter with the mysterious thudding sounds in his new cottage.
Discovery of the hidden hatch in the basement and the emergence of the monster.
Bertrand's flight from his home after the monster's appearance.
Bertrand's attempt to find a weapon to confront the monster.
The ineffectiveness of Bertrand's weapons against the monster and his repeated retreats.
Introduction of the Numbing Elixir and its impact on Bertrand's perception of pain.
Bertrand's life consumed by the struggle with the monster and the elixir's influence.
The shopkeeper's wisdom on understanding the monster's wants and needs.
Bertrand's decision to communicate with the monster instead of fighting.
The monster's acceptance of Bertrand's invitation to talk upstairs.
Transcripts
It was Bertrand’s first night in his new cottage in the countryside of the Scottish
Lowlands. He had just moved from Stockbridge, a neighborhood that was once a reasonably small
village but had become absorbed by Scotland’s capital city of Edinburgh as the New Town had
grown and encroached on the neighboring villages. Bertrand didn’t really like people. He often found
himself feeling exhausted by them—at best. He felt this way as long as he could remember. As a child,
he was very rambunctious—at least that’s what people called him. He was insistent,
curious, and active. He often challenged local boys to fights. He refused to sit
still in primary school. He liked finding high places to climb and then throwing rocks off the
edge to see them explode into pieces. Being of a strict, traditional, religious family,
Bertrand frequently found himself in trouble and subject to the discipline of his father.
His father was especially strict and harsh, and his discipline often teetered into the realm
of abuse. He would sometimes hit Bertrand or deprive him of things like food or his
bed. Bertrand’s mother’s disciplinary style was far more passive—but being
passively complicit in abuse is its own form of abuse. Outside of his homelife,
Bertrand’s experience at school and church wasn’t much better. A figure like his father seemed to
be present everywhere. At an early age, for Bertrand, people were mostly just reminders
that he needed to be someone else—someone who others expected and wanted him to be.
As Bertrand got older, he fell more and more in line. He learned how to accept and adhere to the
rules, demands, and structure of his home, his church, his school programs, and society. After
secondary school, he enrolled in a ship building program and then went on to work for a major ship
manufacturer in the city. His boss was awful, often taking advantage of Bertrand, forcing
him to work jobs without pay or fulfill tasks completely unrelated to his responsibilities.
His coworkers sometimes took advantage of him as well, especially the older ones. Outside of work,
he was mostly alone, as he struggled to maintain many friendships and relationships.
Bertrand was often angry—at work and at home. He felt trapped in the neighborhood and city. He was
regularly bothered by the noise and activity. The sounds of the world seemed to constantly
bang against his home—a small one-bedroom stone-faced construction sandwiched between
others just like it. Sounds smacked against his windows, his floorboards, his walls, his head.
At thirty-two years old, Bertrand had some money, some skills, and some autonomy. And now,
he wanted out. When the first opportunity came for him to leave the neighborhood
and surrounding city, he took it. Now, in his new cottage home, deep in
the countryside, he was secluded from everyone. It was a perfect, mid-sized, simple home with plenty
of land where he could now build handcrafted ships directly for individuals on his own.
The cottage was over two miles away from any towns. It was accessible only by one
single road that would rarely see much of any traffic. From every angle of his house,
you couldn’t see anyone—you couldn’t even see any signs of anyone. It was just Bertrand now.
It was late, and Bertrand was tired. He lay in bed, thinking back and forth to himself for a
while. Soon, he closed his eyes and breathed in deeply. The hallucinogenic state of sleep
began to take over his waking mind. Typical to this phase of the night, he experienced weird,
disconnected thoughts—contemplations, visualizations, and desires that Bertrand
didn’t recognize and that he wasn’t quite sure of where they came from. Suddenly, his eyes shot
open. A wave of fear and anxiety crashed over him, knocking him back onto the shores of wakefulness.
He could have sworn he heard what sounded like a loud thud. He frantically looked around the room,
trying to locate it. Not finding anything, he quickly got up out and went over to one of
his bedroom windows. He looked out across the sprawling grass-covered hills scattered with
trees, the landscape dimly lit by only stars and the waxing crescent moon. He looked down
at his front yard, then his front door. Then, he looked to both sides of the cottage, pushing the
sides of his head against the window to get as much perspective he could. There was nothing.
“Hmm,” he said out loud to himself, confused. Must have been in my head, he thought to himself.
Bertrand went back to bed. Again, he closed his eyes and breathed in deeply. This breath was
quite a bit louder and shook a bit as he exhaled. He struggled to fall back asleep. His heart was
beating a tune the opposite of a lullaby. After enough time had passed, however, the crests of
brainwaves began to spread out again, and Bertrand began to fall back into the early stages of sleep.
Thud, thud, thud. His eyes shot open again. Trying to be as quiet as he could, he clumsily rolled out
of his bed and scurried to his closet. He pulled out a long piece of wood that looked like an old
piece of floorboard. Slowly, he slid on his feet over to his bedroom door and opened it. His face
clenched as it creaked. Hesitantly, Bertrand made his way around the house, holding the piece of
wood over his shoulders. Starting on the second floor, he checked every hall and every room. He
checked behind the curtains; he checked in the closets and hidden pockets of rooms; he checked
behind every door. Then, he did the same on the first floor. There was nothing anywhere. Thud,
Bertrand heard again. This time, it was louder. He was sure it was coming from inside. It sounded
like it was coming from beneath him. Thud, thud. Bertrand hadn’t checked the basement yet.
He slowly opened the basement door, his eyes peering timidly around the edge of it. Not
seeing anything, he began down the stairs as light as he could, carrying all his weight
on the fronts of his feet. As he descended, he looked around the cold, dark barren space filled
with miscellaneous items that he was storing down there. Otherwise, there was nothing. Thud, thud,
thud, he heard again. This instance was by far the loudest. As Bertrand attempted to follow the
direction of the sound, his eyes caught something he hadn’t previously noticed. It was a handle on
what appeared to be a small wooden hatch on the ground in one of the corners of the basement.
Almost without thinking, Bertrand approached it. He stared down at it. His heart was beating so
loudly, he couldn’t tell if the thudding sound was coming from him now or beneath him. With a
shaky hand that struggled to follow the direction of his mind, Bertrand reached down and opened the
door. In an instant, a plume of black smoke and fragments of light exploded out of it,
knocking Bertrand back and off his feet and shattering the piece of wood into shards.
When he regained some semblance of awareness and control, Bertrand found in front of him what
could only be described as some sort of monster. Bertrand entered a state of shock. He couldn’t
believe what he was seeing. He didn’t believe it. I must be dreaming, he thought to himself.
But the pain felt undeniably real. The smoke and light were still emanating out of the open hatch,
and Bertrand couldn’t get a clear view. What he could see, though, appeared to be a large,
shadowy creature. It just stood there, staring back at Bertrand through the clouds of smoke and
beams of light. It moved with a sort of unnatural naturalness—a fluidity typically reserved only for
underwater creatures. It looked like it was almost hovering. Before Bertrand could get a good view,
he got up and sprinted out of the basement—he ran up the stairs, out the front door,
and down the road. He ran, and he ran, and he ran. The next morning, a shopkeeper for a general store
in one of the nearest towns found Bertrand sleeping outside the store’s entrance. The
shopkeeper was an older man in his sixties or seventies. His hair was gray and thin,
mostly only left on the sides of his head, filling in more and more down toward his chin,
forming into a full beard. He was short and hunched over a bit, but he walked with
complete confidence and indifference. He gave a Bertrand a friendly but forceful nudge with
his foot as he walked up to the store’s entrance. Bertrand quickly jolted up, dusting himself off,
shaking his head, and scrunching his eyes. “Hi,” Bertrand said, frantic and disoriented.
“Hello,” the old man said. The man continued past Bertrand,
unlocking the front door, and entering the store. Bertrand chased in after him.
“I need a weapon,” Bertrand shouted clumsily. “Okay,” said the man in a calm, unaffected
tone. “Everything we have is over there.” The man pointed at a few shelves and cases
toward the back of the store. Bertrand rushed over to the
shelves and cases and began inspecting them. “Are you from around here?” the old man asked.
“Yeah, I just moved a mile or two up the road,” Bertrand responded.
“Why? Not much out here,” said the old man. “That’s why,” Bertrand answered. “Self-reliance.
Self-actualization.” “Hmm,” said the old man.
Bertrand compared prices of weapons and imagined battles inside his head in which
he killed the monster—in which he regained control over and peace inside his home.
Eventually, he looked over to the man. “I’ll take that one,” he said, pointing at a large sword.
“That’ll be six pounds,” said the old man. Bertrand paid the shopkeeper, left the store,
and made his way back to home. When he arrived home, he spent some time
in his front yard by himself. He practiced using the sword, trying different stances, and swiping
it in front of him. He struck and slashed at nothing. After many hours passed and the sun began
to submit to the night sky, and he felt he was ready, Bertrand went inside and into the basement.
He found the basement empty and quiet. The hatch was closed. He slowly approached it, holding the
sword out in front of him. His breath sped up. His heartbeat echoed throughout his body. With
the sword in his right hand, he opened the hatch with his left and out shot the smoke and light,
nearly blinding him. Soon, the hazy outline of the monster emerged, and Bertrand began to swing
the sword back and forth in its direction. He completely forgot all the motions he had
planned. The monster seemed to almost morph into what looked like a disfigured person. Bertrand
swung harder and harder. The monster appeared completely unaffected. It effortlessly evaded
every swing. Bertrand, soon realizing his underpreparedness, retreated, frantically
running back up the stairs, out his home, and down the road. He ran, and he ran, and he ran.
The next morning, again, the shopkeeper found Bertrand sleeping outside the store’s entrance.
He kicked Bertrand, and Bertrand jumped up. “Hi … I … uhm … I need a different weapon.
That one didn’t work. I need something more powerful. And easier to use.”
“Okay,” the old man responded. “Come on in.” Bertrand followed the man in, going back
over to the shelves and cases of weapons. After much inspection,
he decided on a flail—a weapon with a spiked metal ball attached to a wooden handle by a metal chain.
“I’ll take that one,” Bertrand said, pointing at the flail.
“That’ll be five pounds,” the old man responded. Bertrand paid the man and began his way back home.
Before going inside, he practiced with the flail. Nighttime soon began to take its turn in the sky,
and after he felt ready, Bertrand made his way inside and down into the basement. Again,
he found the basement quiet; the hatch was closed. Trembling, he opened it,
and out shot the smoke, and the light, and the terror. Bertrand moved back and steadied himself,
waiting for a better view of the monster. Then, he began to swing the flail recklessly,
his eyes were closed more than open. The monster effortlessly shoved Bertrand away, sending him
sliding on his back across the basement floor, and slamming him into the wall. In immense pain now,
Bertrand scurried back onto his feet and ran out of the basement, out of his home,
and down the road. He ran, and he ran, and he ran. The next morning, unsurprised at this point,
the shopkeeper found Bertrand waiting outside the store.
He let him in, and Bertrand looked around at all the weapons again.
After a few minutes passed, Bertrand looked over at the shopkeeper and said, “Excuse me.”
The old man looked over. “Yup?” he said. “I need weapons, but I also need … something
else. An edge. Something that might help me in a fight mentally, or physically,
or both. Do you have anything like that?” “Yeah,” the old man said nonchalantly. He
walked to the other side of store, still behind the counter, and then returned with a small,
reddish bottle. “I think this is what you’re looking for,” he said, handing the bottle to
Bertrand. The label on the bottle read, Numbing Elixir: Feel Nothing. “Drink a few drops of that,
and, for several hours, you won’t feel any pain.” “That’s perfect!” Bertrand said with
enthusiasm. “I’ll take it.” “One pound,” the man said.
Bertrand paid the man and returned home. Before going inside, he drank a few drops of the elixir.
He grabbed his flail that he had left outside and swung it around a bit as he waited for the effects
of the elixir to kick in. Soon, he began to feel numb—he felt a warmth, and calmness, and bliss;
a disconnection from his body, and a disconnection from the terror. It made him so numb, however,
that when he went down into the basement and opened the hatch, he could barely
stand up right. His balance was off. His focus and aim were absent. He flailed even more wildly
at the monster than he had the night prior. “Get out of my house!” Bertrand yelled with a
slur in his voice. “You don’t belong here! This is mine! I live here!”
The monster swerved around the basement, evading Bertrand’s haphazard swings. It knocked and shoved
Bertrand around, but Bertrand didn’t feel any of it. Because of the elixir, he didn’t even barely
care that he wasn’t accomplishing anything. He didn’t care that the monster was there,
puppeteering him around his own home. Soon, Bertrand became exhausted and just gave up.
He retreaded back upstairs, and this night, he just slept in his room—he took a few more
drops of the elixir before he went to bed. He figured if the monster was going to kill him,
he would’ve already done so, and since he couldn’t feel any pain, what was the risk?
Over the following many days, Bertrand attempted to fight the monster nearly every night,
drinking increasing quantities of the elixir each time. He returned to the general store many times
to buy more weapons. He bought double-sided axes, stars, a bow and arrow, and so on. He bought more
and more of the elixir as well. By this point, his home was a mess. He hadn’t cleaned it or finished
organizing his stuff, and broken objects were scattered around his home from nights in which
he took too much elixir. He hadn’t gotten much of any work done on the ship he was supposed
to be working on. He couldn’t focus, he couldn’t barely sleep—at least not without the elixir. He
couldn’t live a normal life in his own home. He was angry all the time. His life became consumed
by fighting the monster, doing everything he could to kill it, and, yet nothing worked.
Desperate, Bertrand found himself at the store again.
“I need something else. Something different,” he said to the shopkeeper in a defeated tone
as he stared at the inventory of weapons and elixirs. “Do you have anything else?”
“What exactly are you fighting?” the old man asked. “You’ve never even said.”
Bertrand looked up and over at him. “I’m not sure. It’s some sort of monster. It lives
in the basement of my new home.” “Hmm,” said the old man. “Well,
you’ve tried nearly every weapon I have. Every elixir.” The old man rubbed his beard for a
moment. “What does the monster want?” “I’m not sure,” Bertrand responded,
confused. “It’s a monster. I don’t know if it wants anything.”
“Well, everything wants something. Have you tried talking to it?”
Bertrand paused. “No. Like I said, it’s a monster.”
“Well, maybe you should try. You know some monsters don’t even mean to be monsters. And
they don’t want to be. They’re born or created in a way that causes them to be one. Or the
world treats them like one and that causes them to be one. Either way, they often just need what
you or I or anyone else needs. To be talked to. To be respected. To be given the space
to be themselves. You want my recommendation? Go home. No weapons. No elixirs. Go to the monster.
Ask it who it is and what it wants. Accept that it is there, in your house. Find common ground
with it. Compromise with it. Empathize with it. Some things you can’t ignore or fight.
Some things you have to talk to directly.” Bertrand stood in silence for a moment,
staring back at the man. He nodded and left. When Bertrand returned home, he went into the
basement. He left his weapons outside. He kept himself sober. In the basement, as it always was,
the hatch was closed. He approached it, breathed in deeply, and then reached down
and ripped it open. Smoke and light shot out. The clouds and rays consumed him as he watched
the vague outline of the monster appear. In front of him, it stood. Bertrand did
not approach it, but he did not back away either. He stood his ground, close enough
to see and communicatee with it. The hazy outline morphed more
and more into a defined human-like figure. Bertrand breathed in loudly through his nostrils.
Then, in a shaky but bold voice, he said, “Would you like to come upstairs? We can talk there.”
There was a long pause. “Yes. Thank you,” said the monster.
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