how to build REAL confidence: self-worth tips, magnetic confidence, beat insecurities and glow up!đ
Summary
TLDRDieses Video prĂ€sentiert sieben praktische Tipps, um das Selbstvertrauen zu stĂ€rken. Von der Ăberwindung von Selbstzweifeln bis zur AuthentizitĂ€t, zeigt die Sprecherin, wie man durch bewusste Entscheidungen und positive SelbstgesprĂ€che ein selbstbewussterer Mensch werden kann. Sie teilt ihre persönliche Transformation mit und ermutigt die Zuschauer, ihre eigenen Ăngste und Unsicherheiten zu ĂŒberwinden, um ein selbstbestimmtes und erfĂŒllteres Leben zu fĂŒhren.
Takeaways
- đ Selbstvertrauen kann durch 'Faking it till you make it' entwickelt werden, aber echtes Selbstvertrauen kommt von innen und ist nachhaltiger.
- đ Ohne die Suche nach Zustimmung anderer entsteht ein echtes Selbstvertrauen, das unabhĂ€ngig von externen Meinungen ist.
- đŁ Affirmationen sind wichtig, um die negative Selbstwahrnehmung und den inneren Kritiker umzukehren und Selbstzweifel zu verringern.
- đïžââïž Durch kontinuierliches Herausfordern der eigenen Grenzen und das Aufbauen eines Beweisportfolios gegen Selbstzweifel, kann man echtes Selbstvertrauen entwickeln.
- đł Verlegenheit ist eine Wahl und kann durch Exposition und Akzeptanz reduziert werden, um die eigene AuthentizitĂ€t zu stĂ€rken.
- đ AuthentizitĂ€t ist entscheidend fĂŒr echtes Selbstvertrauen und bringt viele Segnungen, darunter die Anziehung der richtigen Menschen und Gelegenheiten.
- đ Echtes Selbstvertrauen basiert auf Selbstliebe, die unabhĂ€ngig von externen Erfolgen oder Erreichungen ist und Akzeptanz aller Aspekte des Selbst einschlieĂt.
- đ§ Sich mit dem jĂŒngeren Selbst zu konversieren, hilft, die Fortschritte zu erkennen und das Selbstvertrauen durch Anerkennung frĂŒherer Erfolge zu stĂ€rken.
- đ€ Selbstvertrauen ist ein Prozess der persönlichen Transformation, der durch die Annahme und Liebe zu einem selbst, unabhĂ€ngig von externen Faktoren, gefestigt wird.
- đ Die Bedeutung der Selbstakzeptanz fĂŒr das Selbstvertrauen, einschlieĂlich der Anerkennung und Akzeptanz der eigenen Fehler und SchwĂ€chen als Teil des Wachstums.
- đ± Das Wachstum des Selbstvertrauens erfolgt durch die stĂ€ndige Selbstreflexion und das Festhalten an den Prinzipien der AuthentizitĂ€t und Selbstliebe.
Q & A
Wie hat sich die Sprecherin in Bezug auf ihre Selbstsicherheit im Laufe der Zeit verÀndert?
-Die Sprecherin hat sich von einer sehr zurĂŒckhaltenden, schĂŒchternen Person, die Angst hatte, neue Leute kennenzulernen, zu einer ausgeschweiften, selbstbewussten Person verwandelt, die sich mit Fremden unterhĂ€lt und selbstbewusst durch ihr Auftreten auftritt.
Was bedeutet 'externe Selbstsicherheit' und wie kann man diese entwickeln?
-Externe Selbstsicherheit beinhaltet Verhaltensweisen wie das Aufrechter Halten von Augenkontakt, richtige Haltung und positive Körpersprache, die oft durch das 'vortĂ€uschen bis man es schafft' erreicht werden kann. Die Sprecherin glaubt fest an dieses Konzept und hat es als nĂŒtzlich fĂŒr die Entwicklung ihrer eigenen Selbstsicherheit beschrieben.
Was unterscheidet 'interne Selbstsicherheit' von 'externer Selbstsicherheit'?
-Interne Selbstsicherheit ist wichtiger und nachhaltiger; sie bedeutet, die Zustimmung anderer nicht zu suchen und eigene Meinungen zu vertrauen. Die externe Selbstsicherheit kann andere tÀuschen, die interne Selbstsicherheit ist jedoch dauerhaft und bedeutet, in jeder Situation selbstbewusst zu sein.
Wie können Affirmationen die Selbstsicherheit einer Person stÀrken?
-Affirmationen können dazu beitragen, die negative Selbstwahrnehmung und den inneren Kritiker einer Person umzukehren. Sie sind ein Werkzeug zur SelbstverstÀrkung, das dazu dient, an sich selbst zu glauben und zu wissen, dass die eigenen Ziele erreichbar sind.
Was ist der Unterschied zwischen externer und interner Selbstsicherheit in Bezug auf die Wirkung auf die eigene Wahrnehmung?
-Externe Selbstsicherheit kann andere tÀuschen, aber die interne Selbstsicherheit beeinflusst die eigene Wahrnehmung und das Selbstvertrauen. Die Sprecherin betont, dass es wichtig ist, nicht von der Meinung anderer abhÀngig zu sein und eigene Entscheidungen zu treffen.
Wie kann man seine Selbstzweifel ĂŒberwinden, um echte Selbstsicherheit zu entwickeln?
-Um Selbstzweifel zu ĂŒberwinden, empfiehlt die Sprecherin, kontinuierlich den Komfortzonen zu entkommen und sich in Situationen zu bewegen, die normalerweise Selbstzweifel hervorrufen wĂŒrden. Dies beinhaltet, sich in schwierigen Situationen zu bewĂ€hren und dadurch ein Portfolio von Beweisen fĂŒr die eigene FĂ€higkeit aufzubauen.
Was ist die Bedeutung von AuthentizitĂ€t fĂŒr die Entwicklung von Selbstsicherheit?
-AuthentizitĂ€t bedeutet, keine Angst zu haben, sein wahres Selbst zu sein, und nicht der Meinung anderer oder der Gesellschaft zu folgen. Die Sprecherin betont, dass echte Selbstsicherheit durch das Zerstören der Angst vor AuthentizitĂ€t erreicht werden kann und dass dies dazu fĂŒhrt, dass man von innen heraus selbstbewusst ist.
Wie kann man seine Online-Nutzung Àndern, um seine Selbstsicherheit zu stÀrken?
-Die Sprecherin schlÀgt vor, echte Menschen zu folgen, die einem Àhnlich sind, und Bildungsschöpfer, um die eigene Kultur und die eigenen ethnischen Merkmale zu schÀtzen und zu verteidigen. Dies kann dazu beitragen, die eigene Selbstsicherheit zu stÀrken, indem man nicht mehr stÀndig mit Fremden im Internet verglichen wird.
Was sind die Vorteile von 'Schamlosigkeit' in Bezug auf Selbstsicherheit?
-Die Sprecherin argumentiert, dass Schamlosigkeit eine Wahl ist und dass man sich nicht schĂ€men sollte, wenn man etwas tut, das man fĂŒr richtig hĂ€lt. Indem man sich der Scham nicht hingibt, kann man seine Selbstsicherheit stĂ€rken und sich nicht von der Meinung anderer einschrĂ€nken lassen.
Wie kann man seine jĂŒngere Selbst sehen, um die Selbstsicherheit zu stĂ€rken?
-Indem man sich die jĂŒngere Selbst vorstellt und mit ihr spricht, kann man die Fortschritte, die man gemacht hat, anerkennen und sich selbst fĂŒr die erreichten Erfolge feiern. Dies fördert die Selbstsicherheit, indem man sich daran erinnert, wie weit man gekommen ist und wie stolz man auf sich selbst sein sollte.
Outlines
đ Selbstvertrauen durch Transformation
Der erste Absatz erzĂ€hlt die persönliche Transformation der Sprecherin von einer schĂŒchternen, unsicheren Person zu einer selbstbewussten und sozialen Medien-Influencer. Sie diskutiert die Bedeutung von Selbstvertrauen und teilt, wie sie durch 'Faking it till you make it' und die Entwicklung von innerem Selbstvertrauen eine positive VerĂ€nderung in ihrem Leben bewirkt hat. Sie betont, dass Ă€uĂerliches Selbstvertrauen leichter zu erreichen ist, aber innerem Selbstvertrauen ist wichtiger und nachhaltiger. Zudem wird auf die Rolle von BestĂ€tigungen und die Bedeutung, die eigene Meinung zu vertrauen, hingewiesen.
đ Die Macht der BestĂ€tigungen und Herausforderungen
In diesem Absatz geht es um die Rolle von BestÀtigungen im Prozess der Selbstvertrauensentwicklung. Die Sprecherin erklÀrt, dass BestÀtigungen dazu beitragen können, die eigene negative Selbstwahrnehmung umzukehren und Selbstzweifel zu verringern. Sie teilt ihre persönlichen Erfahrungen mit der Verwendung von BestÀtigungen, wie das Umkehren von Selbsthass und die Anpassung von Online-Konsumgewohnheiten, um eine positivere Selbstbild zu entwickeln. Zudem wird die Bedeutung von SelbstbekÀmpfung und der Erstellung eines Beweisportfolios gegen Selbstzweifel hervorgehoben.
đ Ăberwindung der Scham und AuthentizitĂ€t
Der dritte Absatz konzentriert sich auf die Ăberwindung von SchamgefĂŒhlen als Teil des Selbstvertrauens. Die Sprecherin argumentiert, dass Scham eine soziale Konstruktion ist und dass man sich die Wahl hat, ob man sich schĂ€mt oder nicht. Sie teilt ihre Erfahrungen mit der Expositionstherapie, um sich an die Ăffentlichkeit und die damit verbundenen SchamgefĂŒhle zu gewöhnen. Des Weiteren wird die Bedeutung von AuthentizitĂ€t und wie sie zur Selbstvertrauensentwicklung beitrĂ€gt, erlĂ€utert, einschlieĂlich der Vorteile von echtem Selbstsein und die Ablehnung, der Meinung anderer zu folgen.
đ Selbstliebe als Fundament des Selbstvertrauens
In diesem Absatz wird die Rolle der Selbstliebe im Aufbau von Selbstvertrauen betont. Die Sprecherin erklĂ€rt, dass echtes Selbstvertrauen auf der Liebe zu einem selbst basiert, unabhĂ€ngig von externen Erfolgen oder Leistungen. Sie diskutiert, wie manche Menschen ihre SelbstwertschĂ€tzung an Ă€uĂeren Dingen wie Aussehen, akademischen Erfolgen oder beruflichen Errungenschaften binden, und warum dies nicht die wahre Selbstliebe ist. Stattdessen sollte man sich selbst lieben, auch wenn manche Aspekte des Lebens nicht perfekt sind, und dies ist der SchlĂŒssel zum wahren Selbstvertrauen.
đ€ RĂŒckblick und Dankbarkeit fĂŒr die eigene Entwicklung
Der vierte Absatz spricht ĂŒber die Wichtigkeit, sich der eigenen Entwicklung bewusst zu sein und fĂŒr diese dankbar zu sein. Die Sprecherin empfiehlt, sich mit der jĂŒngeren selbst zu konversieren, um die Fortschritte zu erkennen und zu feiern. Sie betont, dass selbst wenn man noch nicht alles erreicht hat, was man sich vorstellt, es wichtig ist, die kleinen Erfolge und die Wege, die man zurĂŒckgelegt hat, anzuerkennen. Dies fördert eine reiche, positive Einstellung und stĂ€rkt das Selbstvertrauen, indem man sich an die Errungenschaften erinnert und sich selbst fĂŒr das bereits Erreichte bedankt.
đ Schlussfolgerung und persönliche Reflexion
Der letzte Absatz fasst die vorherigen Punkte zusammen und reflektiert persönlich auf die VerÀnderungen, die Selbstvertrauen in dem Leben der Sprecherin bewirkt hat. Sie ermutigt die Zuschauer, ihre eigenen Fortschritte anzuerkennen und auf die positiven Aspekte ihres Lebens zu fokussieren, anstatt auf das Fehlen von Dingen. Die Sprecherin teilt ihre Hoffnung, dass die Tipps hilfreich sein mögen und betont, dass Selbstvertrauen ein Leben lang verÀndern kann, basierend auf ihrer eigenen Erfahrung.
Mindmap
Keywords
đĄSelbstvertrauen
đĄĂuĂeres vs. Inneres Selbstvertrauen
đĄBestĂ€tigung
đĄSelbstbewertung
đĄSelbstaffirmationen
đĄScham
đĄAuthentizitĂ€t
đĄSelbstliebe
đĄKomfortzone
đĄSelbstreflektion
Highlights
Transformation from a shy, insecure individual to a confident social media influencer and extrovert.
Importance of distinguishing between external and internal confidence, with a focus on developing the latter for sustainability.
The concept of 'faking it till you make it' as a strategy for developing external confidence.
Affirmations as a tool for reframing negative self-perception and combating self-doubt.
The role of social media in fostering comparison and insecurity, and ways to counteract these effects.
Building a portfolio of proof against self-doubt through consistently stepping out of one's comfort zone.
The idea that embarrassment is a choice and can be overcome through exposure therapy.
Authenticity as a key to real confidence and its benefits in attracting the right people and opportunities.
The process of becoming authentic by getting to know oneself and embracing one's unique qualities.
Self-love as the foundation of true confidence, independent of external achievements.
The importance of engaging in conversation with one's younger self to appreciate personal growth and progress.
The practice of gratitude and reflection on past achievements as a confidence booster.
The impact of confidence on personal and professional success, and the transformative power of self-belief.
Strategies for overcoming the fear of public speaking and social interactions by facing discomfort head-on.
The significance of not seeking approval from others and trusting one's own opinion as a step towards internal confidence.
The role of self-compassion in developing a healthy self-image and combating negative self-talk.
The final encouragement to apply the discussed confidence tips and the reminder of the potential for personal transformation.
Transcripts
listen I went from being the quietest
shyest girl in the room who could never
make new friends because she was so
terrified of speaking to new people so
being the extroverted Life of the Party
who could walk up to a running stranger
and strike up a conversation with them I
went from being so insecure about myself
that I had to hide my face in every
single photo taken of me to literally
doing modeling shoots and being a social
media influencer I went from chasing
people because I was so desperate for
other people's approval to going out
sitting in restaurants alone and just
being okay with being myself because I'm
so detached and confident in who I am if
I can make that much of a transformation
and up level my life through my
confidence you sure as hell can if you
live that life you will never attain
confidence that not right that is
embarrassing that means that you're
judging yourself anyways I need to just
calm down and take a deep breath I'm
just very passionate about this hello
everyone and welcome back to my channel
today's video is super important because
I'm going to be sharing with you seven
in-depth real confident tips and
strategies that you can start
implementing today to become your new
and improved confident self for the new
year but before you watch this video or
maybe even after I actually have a
previous video that I filmed on my
channel it's the part one to this video
which is called how to be confident is
one of my most popular videos I'm super
proud of it and it's got real strategies
that will help you become confident I'm
not going to be repeating any of those
tips in this video we're going to be
talking about new strategies but I'll
leave it linked in the description and
it's linked up here and remember that I
consistently share confidence tips on my
Tick Tock under my playlist called body
tips and you'll find regular content on
there every single day so let's get into
the confidence tips number one is
external versus internal confidence
external confidence is easier to achieve
because it involves a lot of Faking it
till you make it which I'm a massive
believer in and that really helped me
develop my own confidence I love fake it
to your makeup I definitely recommend
embodying the characteristics of your
dream self until they naturally become a
part of who you are but I covered all of
that advice in my confidence part one
video like I mentioned before so today
we're going to be talking about internal
confidence which is much more important
yes external confidence can be useful
you know people give you tips like
always make eye contact have the right
posture talk to everybody never be on
your phone have positive body language
using those tips will make sure that
you're definitely successful in fooling
other people into thinking you're super
confident even if you're super shy and
introverted on the inside but when you
go home after faking it till you make it
and you then have to face your inner
dialogue again you won't feel confident
on the inside and this is where internal
confidence comes from it's much more
sustainable and it means you'll be
confident all of the time so what does
internal confidence mean it means not
seeking approval from others you know
when you're posting something on
Instagram don't send a picture in your
group chat for them to approve it first
if you like it then that's enough you
should start trusting your own opinion
your opinion is valid it doesn't matter
what anybody else thinks post it you
don't need a second opinion and
reassurance from other people with every
decision you make when you decide to do
that what you're basically saying to
yourself is I don't trust my own opinion
and my own opinion probably isn't
correct so I need other people to tell
me what I should do and that right there
is gradually decreasing your confidence
over time confidence tip number two
affirmations only work in reframing your
negative self-perception and inner
critic everybody asks yeah but do
affirmations actually work you know
saying you're abused feeling confident
in a mirror every day isn't gonna
magically make you so I completely agree
the other tips I'm about to go through
in this video they will help you become
conflict very quickly but affirmations
the purpose of them is to help you work
backwards from your self-hate from
everything bad you say about yourself
from your inner critic and yes it might
not necessarily make you confident
overnight but what it will do is it will
decrease your self-doubt and it will
make sure that the confidence you have
isn't decreasing affirmations is about
self-empowerment it's about believing in
yourself and knowing what you want is
achievable and that you're capable of it
and remember your thoughts reflect your
reality if you constantly think I'm not
worthy of this I'm not attractive I'm
never gonna be able to date that kind of
person you are vote because that's what
you're constantly feeding to yourself
every single day plus affirmations is a
very well known form of manifestation so
if you want to become a confident person
you need to speak that dream confident
self into reality into existence
affirmations are so crucial because it
will force you to make a habit out of
speaking to yourself positively and a
lot of us suffer from self-hate and it's
not even our fault we live in a digital
age with so many unrealistic beauty
standards and being able to see other
people's Lifestyles at the click of a
button and that causes so much
comparison and that then breeds so much
insecurity so not only do I use
affirmations on a daily basis to remind
myself of the dream person I'm working
towards but also I've done a lot of
techniques to reverse that self-hate
that's so embedded in all of us for
example I changed my online consumption
habits I started following real people
people who look like me without surgery
Brown women who showed off and were
proud of their ethnic features it also
made me fall back in love with my
culture and my skin color and my ethnic
features again and that really helped
increase my confidence instead of
following celebrities that started
following educational creators so every
day when I went on social media I wasn't
thinking about oh my God these people
live in a mansion and they're so rich
and I have nothing but I was just
learning new things and I wasn't
constantly comparing myself to strangers
on the internet every day and lastly
with affirmations I think talking to our
younger selves is a great way to
practice affirmation when you're
engaging in this self-hate behavior and
you're criticizing yourself or yourself
that is growing the one thing that
immediately snaps me out of that is
envisioning my younger self any bad
things I'm saying to myself and being
hard on myself I imagine not saying that
to the six or seven year old version and
instantly it forces me to empathize with
myself this is really important to have
self-compassion so yes affirmation
doesn't magically lead to a huge growth
in confidence overnight but it does
prevent you from damaging the confidence
you already have and this leads me to
confidence tip number three instead of
relying on affirmations build a whole
portfolio of proof against yourself
doubt the best truest way to build real
confidence is to overcome your
self-doubt you basically need to prove
to yourself that you are capable and
every single limiting belief you have
about yourself is false because that's
the thing that's holding you back from
developing real confidence in my opinion
the only way to do this and I practice
this all the time is consistently
stepping out of your comfort zone this
is where we start building a portfolio
of proof that we are confident and we
are deserving and we can do anything we
put our minds to which is Ultimate
confidence for example I would say I'm a
pretty confident person but I still get
very nervous meeting new people going on
photo shoots every single time a day
comes where I'm like oh my God I have to
go out and meet a bunch of new people
today I'm so scared and I want to cancel
so bad because it's so uncomfortable I
don't want to do it I want to stay in my
bedroom and be in my little cocoon and
be an introvert in peace do I do that no
I force myself every single time I have
to meet the photographer I have to meet
these new people I have to put myself in
that situation where I'm forced into
being an extrovert even though that's
not natural for me is it uncomfortable
for the first five minutes absolutely
because I don't want to do it once I'm
that and I'm doing it and then I've
completed it I've come home what do I
feel like I feel amazing I feel on top
of the world I'm like wow actually that
wasn't as scary as I thought it would be
and I survived it and everything was
okay so then I do it again and then the
second time I do it it's also not that
scary it's actually way less scary than
it was the first time and then wow now I
can do it the third time without even
wanting to cancel and once you
consistently prove to yourself that I
could put myself in an unfamiliar
situation and get through it your
self-doubt will fade away because it has
nothing to go off of whereas the fastest
way to grow your self-doubt which is the
ultimate confidence killer is by
consistently saying you're gonna do
something and then never doing it if you
live that life you will never attain
confidence confidence tip number four
embarrassment is a choice it's literally
just a concept in fact it's a social
construct you can literally choose not
to be embarrassed every single time you
choose to feel embarrassed you feel
unconfident you're like oh my God I feel
so insecure I can't believe I did that
but why is it that deep why are you
beating yourself up for like making a
mistake or like if you fell over in
public okay so okay and are you gonna
see any of those people again no it's
normal it happens the fastest way to
desensitize yourself to being cringed or
being embarrassing is through exposure
therapy and what this means is
constantly putting yourself out there
once again linking back to the stepping
outside of your comfort zone and doing
things that normally would kind of make
you feel embarrassed or cringe and you
are now intentionally doing those things
so you're signaling to your brain oh
look I'm doing this and it's fine and
it's not embarrassing it's not cringy
for example filming yourself in public
being a YouTuber very hard to do I had
to force myself to do it the first few
times I did it I went to hide my camera
away I don't want to make eye contact
with anyone if a bunch of people working
towards me I'd literally put my vlogging
camera away and I'd stop because I'd
feel so cringy and embarrassing now I do
it in the back of my mind I'm like oh my
God this is so scary what are people
thinking I grabbed my vlogging camera I
hold it high and I'm walking through a
bunch of people in the middle of the
city center vlogging speaking to myself
in front of a camera and I'm from a
small town so people can be very judgy
about this and everyone's staring at me
and in my head I'm like I'm doing it I'm
fine nothing's happening to me this is
safe and I'm gonna get the content I
need and I don't care what any of these
people say because I'm never going to
see them again oh you don't like what I
did or you think that's cringy or you
think like me falling over whatever is
embarrassing okay but your approval
isn't that deep to me so
I'm just gonna carry on with my life
over here and probably never see you
again but literally like next time you
catch yourself feeling embarrassed just
remember what you're saying to yourself
is that that random person like whoever
they are their approval matters more to
you that you are now going to put
yourself through feelings of guilt and
shame because you're so concerned about
what somebody else thinks about you for
like five seconds of their day because
after the first five seconds they're
gonna forget about you
let that sink in like literally my
validation and my approval is the only
thing that matters to me so see ya
embarrassment is literally just fear and
anticipation of the negative opinions
other people might have of you just let
that sink in for a second and realize
how crazy it is at the end of the day
nobody has any grounds to stand on when
it comes to judging me you know why
because everybody's cringe everybody's
cringe some people are just better at
hiding it than others and to those
people I say shame on you shame on you
own your cringe okay why are you out
here hiding it you are not being
authentic because you are so concerned
with what other people think about you
and I'm sorry but that that right there
is embarrassing and you're probably
gonna feel embarrassed when I say that
because you haven't desensitized
yourself to be in cringed and because
now I have a negative opinion of you
you're gonna take that on do you see how
ridiculous that is why do you care what
I think I'm a stranger I'm literally
talking to you through a screen right
now anyways I need to just calm down and
take a deep breath I'm just very
passionate about this like just openly
be cringe and just be authentic because
let me tell you the benefits to being
being authentic are endless and lastly
if you think people are judging you what
other people think you're embarrassing
what that really means and this is a
fact
that means that you're judging yourself
if you think other people are gonna
think what you're doing is embarrassing
that means you think what you're doing
is embarrassing and you need to reverse
that mindset and work back from it
because I judge myself all the time I
was like vlogging in public and taking
pictures of myself by myself with a
tripod at public with people staring at
me and walking past and I felt shame
that I shouldn't be doing that you know
people are going to walk past and
they're going to think who is this girl
and like she thinks she's some sort of
celebrity why why did I feel bad about
that I'm not hurting anybody I'm not
doing anything bad so I had to stop
judging myself and I had to condition
myself into thinking this is okay it's
okay to film yourself in public and take
pictures yes maybe it's not normal but
it's okay and I don't need to be so
harsh on myself about that and once I
was kinder to myself which is once again
like I mentioned before where
affirmations come into play
automatically I'm gonna stop thinking
that everybody around me is judging me
because what is there to judge
confidence tip number five authenticity
real confidence is destroying the fear
of being authentic don't get it twisted
okay 90 of people on this planet are so
terrified of being authentic that they
follow the crowd and they want to be
like everybody else and just fit in
that's an actual like psychological fact
that people just think the way that
they'd rather just fit in with everyone
even if they're not fully being
themselves and that's so messed up don't
let it be you and I'm not judging okay
I'm not judging because I used to be the
same I wanted people to like me and I
want to make friends and just like be
approved of because I had no internal
confidence so I just used to do whatever
I had to do to fit in with everybody
else but you know what yes half the time
that will work people will like you
because you're being just like them but
you know what that will also cause so
much resentment because you're not being
yourself and you you don't you lose
yourself you don't even know who you are
so let's cut that out right now and
let's talk about authenticity instead
because ever since I decided to start
living authentically so many more
blessings have come to me in my life the
benefits include attracting people that
actually meant for you when I'm if I'm
being cringy or passionate like online
and fully being myself instead of like
trying to be what I think people want
from me like yes it might mean a lot of
people don't like me because they think
I'm too loud or cringe or whatever but
the few people that do like me are the
people that are actually meant for me
because I'm attracting people who match
my energy and my vibe if I'm constantly
being fake and trying to fit in how do I
know that the people in my life are
actually meant for me and love and
appreciate me for who I am being
authentic means you're going to attract
the opportunities that are meant for you
if you're putting yourself out there
with like filming in public for example
who knows who might Scout you who knows
who wants to hire you as a credit career
or a model do the things that are real
to you so you can get where you're meant
to be in life you know don't chase jobs
or passions that you think you're meant
to do because you're never going to be
happy that way and lastly of course
being authentic means that you are going
to get a new found sense of confidence
and reach your higher self you are going
to be putting out the best energy and
operating at such a high frequency and
vibration because you're finally being
yourself there's no resentment there's
no constantly worrying about okay but
how am I presenting myself and dressing
and acting you don't have to constantly
check yourself on everything because
you're just living freely and being
yourself and when you get used to living
like your real self then you also fall
in love with yourself and you learn more
about who you are as a person and
develop the confidence that goes with
that so how do I actually become
authentic this is how first and foremost
get to know yourself fully the more you
know about who you are at your core the
more that is to respect and admire and
fall in love with okay maybe Journal
about it really Journey inwards okay
what are my principles what are my
values what do I love what are my
absolute pet peeves what do I stand for
what do I stand against what are my
passions how do I treat people how do I
want to be loved and eventually what
that's going to transfer into is I
really love and appreciate my passions
or my desire to help other people or how
much I care about my siblings or my
parents I love my desire to create art
and Inspire and it goes on and on and on
but if you're constantly trying to fit
into the crowd you could never say those
things about yourself you're just
eventually losing your individuality and
your uniqueness to fit in with the
majority and what is there to live about
yourself if you're not being yourself
next explore your values your weaknesses
your strengths your weaknesses your
Styles your preferences and then act
accordingly embody that every single day
for example I love wearing super bright
colors I love wearing massive jewelry is
that the biggest Trend at the moment no
everybody loves the tiny little gold
hoops which are also cute but I love
these does that mean I fit in or I'm
following the latest fashion crazes and
styles and trends like no but that's
okay because I'm being myself and I feel
a little better about myself because I'm
following that you might really like a
particular aesthetic but you stray away
from that because you want to look good
to the other gender or to your friends
or to society whatever and that's
destroying your confidence because
you're telling yourself it doesn't
matter what I like and it doesn't matter
who I want to be I have to be somebody
else in order to be accepted which is
false and that's just breeding extra
insecurity you know if you have a super
controversial opinion that other people
might not agree with own it say it as
long as it's not hurting anybody and
it's not like really inappropriate own
it because yeah five or six people might
hate you for having that opinion and
they're like you're so wrong but one or
two people that hear it might be like yo
like I have the same opinion and I was
so scared to say it and then you Bond
and then that's like an actual real
friend who likes you for you instead of
all these five or six people that you
don't even align with and finally if
you're authentic and someone tries to
hate on you you own it because when
you're being authentic you're telling
yourself me being real Trump's being
liked by everybody I know not
everybody's gonna like my fully
authentic self and that's okay when
you're trying to fit in with everybody
you're telling yourself that being liked
by everybody is more important than
being myself confidence tip number six
confidence equals real love if you are
not fully and completely in love with
who you are you will never reach full
confidence for example if you only feel
really good about yourself and confident
when your makeup is done and when you've
got the cutest outfit on when you've got
straight A's in your exams when you got
the job the achievement when you went to
the gym every single day for a week and
then you feel good about yourself yeah
that's great but that's not real
confidence the reason that confidence
comes from self-love is self-love is all
about loving yourself no matter what
okay self-love isn't built on attaching
your Worth to external achievements like
hitting the gym or winning an award or
getting your dream job or making a
certain amount of money real self-love
is even if I have I'm going to the gym
all month it's okay I'm still attractive
and I'm so lovable and desirable and
completely whole and worthy as a human
being that's where confidence comes from
because if you are attaching your
confidence and self-love to external
things like grades and opportunities and
success
once those things start to crumble away
or you're having a bad day at work or
you got fired or whatever all of your
confidence and self-love is going to
drift away with that opportunity because
you attached your confidence and
self-love to that thing it needs to be
attached internally to who you are
self-love isn't just acknowledging all
of your favorite qualities it's
acknowledging all of your past mistakes
your flaws your weaknesses all of the
stuff you're super bad at and accepting
them and being like that's okay that's
who I am and I'm gonna own it you
forgive yourself and you understand that
all of those flaws and Imperfections are
necessary factors to get you to where
you need to be or like all of the past
mistakes you've made have been important
factors in getting you to the growth of
your current self so remember if you
failed an exam that doesn't Define my
intelligence or how capable I am in the
future or that I won't be successful in
life if I got rejected by that boy or
girl that doesn't mean that I'm not
desirable and I won't find Love Don't
let failures and external things Define
your character and your worth it should
all come from the inside and from the
love you have for yourself and once you
you master that your confidence will
naturally grow alongside it and the last
confidence tip number seven
your younger self engage in conversation
with your younger self close your eyes
and literally Envision them standing in
front of your current self if you have
to now look at how far you've come no
actually look at how far you've come
because all of us are constantly
programmed to think about how far we
have to go and how much progress we have
to make that we rarely just stop and
pause to reflect on everything we've
achieved thus far and how great we're
actually doing you can still have a long
way to go before you get to your dream
place in life and you can still be
grateful for all of this stuff all of
the obstacles that you've already
overcome even if they're only a few and
you still have majority of the journey
to go that's okay but remember to
reflect and be grateful on everything
you've already done so I don't care if
you failed your exam or you haven't got
your dream job or you haven't found your
soulmate because instead you should be
looking at every single small win you've
achieved in the past things you've got
now that you're taking for granted
because realistically your younger self
could have only dreamed of having what
you currently have even even if you
haven't achieved your wider stream you
still have to things now that your
younger self didn't have and that is
something to celebrate and constantly be
grateful for the new circle of friends
you have the opportunities you have
where you live your new wardrobe that
you own your new skills the wisdom you
have the lessons you've learned over the
last few years see this step is crucial
in building your confidence because it's
constantly reassuring you that you are
succeeding and you are capable of doing
even more when you see how far you've
come it will provide motivation for you
to keep going because if you've got all
of this stuff already from that pasta
then you can get even more in the future
and this ultimately builds confidence in
your intelligence your abilities and
your determination take me for an
example I am not nearly where I want to
be in life I'm only 22 years old I've
got so far so long to go I still live
with my family I just about finished uni
I haven't traveled the world yet I
haven't bought my first designer bag yet
I got a lot of things to take off my
to-do list trust me but I constantly
remember that if my 15 year old self
Could See Me Now she'd be like whoa she
would be so impressed like actually if
my 15 year old self is walking down the
street and my current 22 year old self
is walking past her she would look at me
in awe like she would be so jealous of
me she'd want to be me so bad like so
bad and that's how I know I'm doing like
a live but yeah okay maybe I haven't
moved up and maybe I haven't done all
the big things in the world but I still
made significant progress that my
younger self is proud of me and that is
all I want that is the most important
win and by constantly reminding myself
that by the age of 22 I've already
become someone that my younger self
would be so impressed with that gives me
so much motivation to keep going just to
see how far I can take it because when
you constantly remind yourself of
everything you've done so far and all of
the small wins that just builds
confidence in yourself and your
abilities and you're like I've done this
much I can keep going and getting more
and if you look at this from the big
picture really it's about having an
abundance mindset and reminding yourself
of how much you can do how much you have
done and yes maybe it's not everything
you've ever wanted to do but start
focusing on the good not the lack and
that brings us to the end of this video
I hope you guys enjoyed this video I
absolutely loved it I was definitely
getting way too passionate in some part
of this video just because confidence
truly changed my life if any of you
could see like actually talk to the
version of me like from a few years ago
you would not believe that I was that
shy and that quiet and I've transformed
into a completely different kind of
person which is so possible for each and
every one of you watching this as well
if you're not already following me on
Tick Tock make sure you do because I
always post confidence tips on there and
also check out my Instagram if you're
feeling it and for now if you really
want some more confidence tips then make
sure you check out the first confidence
video ever posted it will be tagged
somewhere on the screen if not in the
description I hope you guys have a
lovely day and I'll see you guys in my
next video bye
[Music]
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