It Took 25+ Years Dating Women to Realize What I’ll Tell You in 10 Mins

Summary

In this insightful video, the speaker explores the concept of 'submitting for approval,' tracing its origins from tribal societies to modern relationships. He emphasizes the significant impact of maternal approval on men's self-worth and how seeking women's validation can lead to unhealthy dynamics in adult relationships. Drawing from personal experiences, he advocates for prioritizing self-approval over external validation, promoting personal growth and confidence. The speaker introduces 'big dick energy' as a metaphor for embracing self-worth, encouraging men to focus on internal validation to foster healthier relationships and a balanced perspective on their value in society.

Takeaways

• 😀 The most important tool for men is the ability to submit for approval, essential for survival and building relationships.
• 😀 Historically, tribes required individuals to prove their worth to gain acceptance, emphasizing the need for social belonging.
• 😀 As toddlers, we learn about good and bad through our parents, establishing a foundation for seeking approval.
• 😀 Maternal approval often holds greater significance for men, influencing their future relationships with women.
• 😀 Throughout life, men prioritize women's approval, shaping their self-worth and interactions.
• 😀 The desire for a woman's approval can lead to unhealthy dynamics in relationships, including a focus on 'happy wife, happy life.'
• 😀 Following a breakup or divorce, men can feel broken but have the opportunity to rebuild and redefine their self-worth.
• 😀 Personal growth involves shifting the focus from seeking a woman's approval to valuing one's own self-approval.
• 😀 The concept of 'big dick energy' represents confidence and self-acceptance, prioritizing personal approval over external validation.
• 😀 Mastering the tool of submission for approval allows men to establish healthier relationships without compromising their self-worth.

Q & A

What is the main tool discussed in the script?

The main tool discussed is the concept of 'submitting for approval,' which is essential for building relationships and has roots in our survival as a species.

How does the concept of approval relate to our early experiences as children?

As toddlers, we begin to learn about good and bad behavior through our parents' approval, which helps us navigate the world and establish our values.

Why is a mother's approval emphasized over a father's?

The speaker suggests that a mother's approval often weighs more heavily due to the emotional bond and the nurturing role mothers typically play in children's lives.

How does the prioritization of women's approval affect men's relationships?

The prioritization of women's approval can lead men to seek validation from women throughout their lives, impacting their self-worth and relationships negatively.

What does the speaker mean by 'big dick energy'?

'Big dick energy' refers to a calm confidence and self-assurance in one's abilities and self-worth, without needing validation from others.

What personal experience does the speaker share regarding approval and relationships?

The speaker shares their experience of seeking their ex-wife's approval, leading to feelings of inadequacy and ultimately a divorce, highlighting the pitfalls of prioritizing external validation.

How can one shift from seeking approval from others to self-approval?

The shift begins by focusing on personal growth, such as improving physical health and building self-confidence, which allows individuals to value their own approval above others'.

What are the potential dangers of overvaluing a woman's approval?

Overvaluing a woman's approval can lead to a loss of self-worth, dependency on external validation, and can negatively affect personal and romantic relationships.

What is the relationship between personal growth and the tool of submission for approval?

Personal growth involves cleaning up the 'tool' of submission for approval by prioritizing self-approval, which enhances one's confidence and ability to build healthy relationships.

What message does the speaker hope to convey to the audience?

The speaker hopes to encourage individuals to value their own approval and self-worth, promoting personal growth and balanced relationships.