What the Church Won’t Tell You about M*sturbation…
Summary
TLDRThis video script addresses the sensitive topic of masturbation from a Christian perspective, emphasizing its conflict with God's design for sexuality within marriage. The speaker discusses the importance of understanding the heart's intent and the potential for guilt and shame associated with the act. Drawing from 'Sexual Detox' by Tim Challis, the script explores the psychological reasons behind the act and its impact on future relationships. It concludes with practical steps for overcoming this struggle through Christ, seeking accountability, and using tools like Covenant Eyes for internet monitoring.
Takeaways
- 🚨 The video discusses sensitive topics like sexuality, physical intimacy, and pornography, and advises viewers to pause if uncomfortable.
- 🌟 The speaker is supported by Patreon, allowing for open discussions without fear of video suppression on platforms like YouTube.
- 📚 A book recommendation is made: 'Sexual Detox' by Tim Challis, for those seeking deeper understanding on the issue of masturbation.
- 💔 Jesus' teachings emphasize the importance of heart intent over physical acts, as lustful thoughts are equated to adultery in spirit.
- 🧐 The script encourages introspection to understand the root causes of the urge to masturbate, such as loneliness, hopelessness, or anxiety.
- 🛑 It argues that masturbation is contrary to God's design for sexuality, which is meant to be shared within the covenant of marriage.
- 🤔 The video highlights the potential for masturbation to create unrealistic expectations for future sexual relationships.
- 🌱 God's design for sexuality is described as fruitful, bonding individuals relationally and leading to pleasure and reproduction.
- 🙏 Overcoming the cycle of masturbation is possible through Christ, with the recognition of forgiveness and righteousness in Jesus.
- 📲 Practical steps are suggested, such as reaching out to a trusted individual for accountability and using tools like Covenant Eyes to monitor internet usage.
- 🔗 The importance of community and support is emphasized for those struggling with the issue, encouraging viewers to seek help and not face it alone.
Q & A
What is the main topic discussed in the video?
-The main topic discussed in the video is the issue of masturbation, its relation to spirituality, and its impact on one's life from a Christian perspective.
What is the purpose of the 'Sexual Detox' book mentioned in the video?
-The 'Sexual Detox' book by Tim Challis is recommended as a resource to delve deeper into the issue of lust and masturbation, offering insights and guidance on overcoming these issues.
How does the video relate Jesus' teachings to the issue of lust and masturbation?
-The video references Jesus' teachings in Matthew 5, where he speaks about the heart's intent and desire, not just the physical act, to highlight that lustful thoughts are considered as sinful as the act itself.
What is the significance of the 'one flesh' concept in the context of the video?
-The 'one flesh' concept signifies God's design for sexual expression to occur within the covenantal bond of marriage, emphasizing the self-giving aspect of sexuality that is contrary to the self-pleasure of masturbation.
Why does the video suggest that masturbation can lead to unrealistic expectations in future relationships?
-The video suggests that masturbation, often accompanied by fantasies, can create unrealistic expectations for future sexual relationships, potentially leading to dissatisfaction and misunderstanding of God's design for sex within marriage.
What are some of the negative emotional effects of masturbation discussed in the video?
-The video discusses feelings of guilt, shame, sadness, and isolation as potential negative emotional effects of masturbation, especially for Christians who feel convicted by the Holy Spirit.
How does the video propose to overcome the cycle of masturbation?
-The video suggests overcoming the cycle of masturbation through Christ, understanding the gospel, seeking forgiveness, and recognizing that one's shame has been washed away through faith in Jesus.
What practical steps does the video recommend for someone struggling with masturbation?
-The video recommends two practical steps: 1) Reach out to a trusted individual for accountability and support, and 2) Sign up for Covenant Eyes, an internet accountability service, to help break free from the cycle of pornography that often fuels masturbation.
What role does the Holy Spirit play in the context of the video's discussion on masturbation?
-The Holy Spirit is portrayed as a convicting force, leading individuals to recognize that masturbation is contrary to God's design and prompting feelings of guilt and the need for repentance.
How does the video address the issue of pornography in relation to masturbation?
-The video acknowledges that masturbation is often fueled by pornography and suggests using Covenant Eyes to create an accountability structure that can help individuals resist the temptation of pornography.
Outlines
🚨 Addressing the Unspoken: Sexuality and Masturbation 🚨
The speaker begins by warning viewers about the sensitive nature of the topic, which includes discussions on sexuality, physical intimacy, and pornography. They express gratitude for the support of their Patreon community, which allows them to tackle such challenging subjects without fear of video suppression on YouTube. The main focus is on the Christian perspective on masturbation, referencing Jesus' teachings from Matthew 5 about lust and the heart's intentions. The speaker recommends 'Sexual Detox' by Tim Challies for further exploration and emphasizes the importance of understanding God's design for sexual expression within marriage, as opposed to the self-pleasure and isolation associated with masturbation.
🌱 God's Design for Sexuality: Fruitfulness and Selflessness 🌱
In the second paragraph, the speaker delves deeper into God's intended design for sexuality, highlighting its purpose to be fruitful relationally, sexually, and physically. They discuss the relational bond and pleasure that comes from sexual intimacy within marriage, as well as the physical aspect of reproduction. The paragraph contrasts this with the act of masturbation, which is described as unfruitful, isolating, and contrary to God's design. The speaker also touches on the feelings of guilt and shame that can accompany masturbation, especially for Christians, and the importance of overcoming these struggles through Christ, not by willpower alone.
🛡 Overcoming the Cycle: Accountability and Spiritual Growth 🛡
The final paragraph offers practical advice for those struggling with masturbation. The speaker encourages viewers to reach out to a trusted individual in their life for accountability and to share their struggles openly. They also recommend signing up for Covenant Eyes, a service that provides internet accountability by sharing browsing history with a designated person. The speaker emphasizes the importance of overcoming the cycle of masturbation through Christ's power and the support of the community, concluding with an invitation to subscribe and follow on other platforms for more content.
Mindmap
Keywords
💡Sin
💡Sexuality
💡Pornography
💡Masturbation
💡Heart Intent
💡Sexual Detox
💡Covenantal Relationship
💡Fruitful
💡Guilt and Shame
💡Gospel
💡Accountability
Highlights
The video addresses the sensitive topic of masturbation from a Christian perspective, emphasizing the importance of discussing it openly.
The speaker acknowledges the support from Patreon, which allows for honest discussions without fear of video suppression on YouTube.
The video references Jesus' teachings in Matthew 5, highlighting the importance of heart intent over physical acts.
Sexual Detox by Tim Challis is recommended for those seeking deeper understanding of the issue.
The absence of direct biblical references to masturbation is compared to the indirect teachings on abortion, suggesting a broader application of biblical principles.
Masturbation is considered contrary to God's design for sexuality within the covenant of marriage.
The video encourages introspection on why individuals may be drawn to masturbation, citing potential reasons such as loneliness, hopelessness, or anxiety.
Guilt and shame associated with masturbation are discussed as a result of the Holy Spirit's conviction.
The damaging effects of masturbation on future relationships and unrealistic expectations are explored.
The video explains how God designed sexuality to be fruitful relationally, sexually, and physically within marriage.
Masturbation is contrasted with the biblical design of sex, highlighting its lack of fruitfulness.
The speaker emphasizes the importance of overcoming masturbation through Christ, not just by willpower or pragmatic beliefs.
The gospel is presented as the key to overcoming sin, including masturbation, by understanding God's forgiveness and the power of Jesus.
Practical steps are suggested, such as finding an accountable person to share struggles with and seeking their support.
Covenant Eyes is recommended as a tool for internet accountability to help break free from the cycle of pornography and masturbation.
The video concludes with a call to action for viewers to take steps towards overcoming masturbation and finding support in their faith community.
Transcripts
this is the sin that nobody wants to
talk about you won't hear about it in
church but it's so important that we
address it just a fair warning in this
video we're going to be talking about
sexuality physical intimacy pornography
if that's going to be a problem for you
put this video on hold and come back to
it later when you're ready one of the
reasons we can have such honest and
Frank conversations on this channel here
one of the reasons that I don't shy away
from these tough topics is because I
have the base of people that support me
on patreon so I don't have to worry too
much about this video getting suppressed
on YouTube we're not getting passed
around as much or monetization being
suppressed because I have you guys on
there that support me if you want to get
behind what I'm doing and create a
sustainable Ministry where I can
continue to make this content head on
over to patreon you can get access to
all sorts of rewards and we do video
streams bi-weekly we also have exclusive
videos on there in our Discord so if
that interests you check it out it will
be a huge blessing now without further
Ado let's dive in so some people say
that masturbation is just Norm normal
and it's natural you'll even hear this
from people that call themselves
Christians as well they say Jesus didn't
really say anything about masturbation
so we're good but I want to hone in on
something that Jesus said in Matthew 5.
when he talks about if you look at a
woman to lust after her you've already
committed adultery with her in your
heart we need to understand there that
Jesus is honing Into the Heart intent
the heart desire and not just the
physical act one of the resources that I
utilized for this video is a book by Tim
Challis called sexual detox I want to
recommend it for you guys because it is
very very beneficial if you want to go
deeper in on this issue one of the
things he points out in the book is just
as abortion specifically isn't mentioned
in the bible we have many verses about
the value of human life of the Dignity
of being knitted together in our
mother's womb and how we are fearfully
and wonderfully made and how that has
direct application to the issue of
abortion today similarly when we look at
this issue of lust and and from our
hearts and this desire the sexual
immorality we can apply this to directly
to masturbation as well something where
we're looking and we're trying to gain
sexual gratification instant
gratification outside of the context of
marriage of that covenantal relationship
and so we can see okay that's not part
of God's design in Genesis we learn
about the first man Adam and how God
said hey it's not good that man should
be alone and he created a help meet for
him in Eve and that the The man shall
leave his father and his mother and
become one flesh with his wife that was
God's design from the beginning that is
the outflowing of aware sexual
expression should take place in that
covenantal Bond and so if we're looking
at masturbation we're seeing okay this
is an isolated act done for
self-pleasure it is a selfish act it is
contrary to kind of the self-giving
sexuality that God calls us to in
marriage I know I can say all this to
you and you're saying okay I get it
Isaac it's not good that I'm doing this
um but I think it's also important that
we understand okay why are we so drawn
to masturbation for you ask yourself
some introspective questions like why is
your heart so drawn to it why do you
want to go to this place again and again
is it loneliness do you feel this deep
sense of lack of connection in your life
maybe it's a sense of hopelessness I'll
never find a partner I'll never get
married and so this is kind of the only
sexual relief that I'll ever get and so
there's there's this lack of Hope there
maybe it's anxiety where you're like I
just my life isn't going well I'm just
anxious about all these different things
I have this kind of sense of I need to
get control but I don't have control
because my life is out of control in a
lot of ways and this is a sense of of
peace and relief that I can find that is
that I can be in control of now when you
masturbate there's going to be a deep
sense of guilt or shame at least as a
Christian because our conscience we're
being convicted by the Holy Spirit
saying hey this isn't what's best for
you this isn't what God wants for you
this is this kind of counter to God's
design it isn't just kind of counter to
God's design it is counter to God's
design and so you're being convicted in
this way but it's important to know that
it's not just about the act itself
that's the sin there's a deeper issue
going on and that's why I want you to be
a little bit introspective here about
what are these kind of core beliefs or
core fears or core anxieties or core
desires that are leading you continually
to to keep on this cycle one of the
really damaging aspects of masturbation
that I hadn't thought about too much
until reading that book by Tim Charlie's
was that it creates kind of a
unrealistic expectations for your future
partner so when you're having these
fantasies in the midst of masturbation
you're having these sexual fantasies
you're creating these expectations of
what you want your future sex life to be
like and and that's just ridiculous
that's just that that can't happen and
you also are training yourself to only
be able to gain sexual satisfaction
based on those fantasies similarly to
pornography when you're fueling yourself
with more and more intense and extreme
scenarios you're putting that
expectation on your future partner in
order for you to feel that sexual
fulfillment which is obviously just
messed up now back to the topic at hand
when God designed sexuality he designed
it to be a fruitful Endeavor when we
talk about fruitful we talk about
fruitful relationally sexually and
physically like in reproduction so
relationally fruitful in that it bonds
two to become one that they are united
that that relationship is bolstered by
that kind of intimacy then when we talk
about sexually fruitful it is
pleasureful that's part of God's design
it's not just kind of mechanical this is
only for having children no the pleasure
aspect is a big part in it and that's
where the self-less component becomes
really prominent because you're not
going into this relationship this
physical Intimacy in order to merely get
but rather to give you're looking to
selflessly fulfill their desires above
your own then physically fruitful your
reproduction you're having children
obviously not every couple is able to
have children but this is kind of a core
element to how God designs sex in
marriage when we talk about masturbation
then is that fruitful relationally no
not at all it's an isolated it act done
with your own fantasies or maybe you're
watching pornography you're bonding to
your screen you're bonding to your
fantasies you're bonding to yourself and
your own desires is it fruitful sexually
well some might see it that way it's
instant gratification you can get off
when you want to but truly if it's not
the way that God designed it it's just
such a small taste of what God had
actually invited us into in proper
context like if sex is inside of
marriage how beautiful and how
life-giving that is as opposed to the
shame and the guilt that comes after
after masturbating it feels good for a
moment but ultimately leads you to guilt
into shame and it definitely doesn't
lead to being fruitful physically if
anything it actually inhibits your
motivation as a man specifically to
pursue the calling that God has on your
life to take responsibility to
ultimately find a woman and to marry her
and to have kids and provide for them
like you're being pacified by
masturbation to this low level of
achievement and and into thinking that
that's okay and that's good so it's not
fruitful at all in that context and you
stay isolated now I want to be honest
with you here if you've been caught in a
cycle of masturbation and you've
experienced guilt or shame or sadness or
isolation I want you to know that this
isn't something that you can't overcome
through Christ notice I put the through
Christ there because if you're doing
this on your own if you're just trying
to overcome this by willpower or just
pragmatic beliefs that my life will
become just better if I stop doing this
so I should just stop it won't work it
won't be enough ultimately what we need
to do is understand the gospel what is
the gospel the gospel is the fact and
the the reality that God through Jesus
has overcome sin that the power of sin
in our life that we have been forgiven
when we put our faith in Jesus that we
have been our shame has been washed away
that we are no longer guilty before him
and that rather now as Christians as
those who have repented for our sin we
can turn to Christ boldly asking for
forgiveness confessing our sins but
recognizing that we are clothed in Jesus
righteousness and that nothing could
separate us from the love of God as his
children the evil one wants to use
masturbation in your life for you to
question your salvation to get you off
of the battlefield this was the game
changer for me realizing that God's
power and presence is with me all the
time as his child I have his power and
his presence with me so that means even
in those moments of isolation God is
present he is not distant and he wants
to meet us even in the midst of our pain
or anxiety or our loneliness he wants to
meet us there and also after you sin he
wants to meet us in the midst of our
shame and our guilt to provide
forgiveness and and lift us off of the
ground to point us ultimately to the
Forgiveness that he has enabled and also
just walking with him in the spirit that
we would not gratify the desires of the
flesh two practical steps before we go
today and I want you to follow through
on these the first one is go through
your phone contact tax who is it in your
life that you trust that you can share
this with I want you to send them a text
now to say hey I've been struggling with
this maybe even a phone call but I know
that can be a lot for somebody so even
just begin with a text say hey I've been
struggling with this it's a problem in
my life I need to be honest and open
about this to get it out of just my
isolated State and can you keep me
accountable on this can you ask me about
this is it okay if I phone you or text
you when I'm tempted is that all right
and maybe they say no but most likely if
it's somebody you trust in your life
there's been some sort of a spiritual
Mentor or just an encouragement in your
life they're going to be more than
willing to say hey yeah of course thank
you for being honest and open and
vulnerable enough with me to share this
and just do it today do not delay on
this it is going to be the most
important step to getting you to helping
you break free from this the second
thing is that masturbation is often
fueled by pornography and so we want to
put up some accountability in order to
make that step a lot lot more
challenging what I want you to do is
click the link in my description and
sign up for Covenant eyes it will send a
report of your internet history to
somebody in your life that can keep you
accountable I've heard it's been a
tremendous help to many men and women
that have helped them break free from
pornography so click the link in my
description and sign up for that as well
thanks so much for watching this video
guys if you enjoyed it subscribe because
I'm putting out new videos every single
week you can follow me on other
platforms as well like Instagram and
Tick Tock at it's Isaac David until next
time I will see you later God bless
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