Not Confident❌? IMPROVE Communication Skills⬆️| English Speaking|Increase Confidence| 2024

The Formal Edit

21 Jan 202416:38

Summary

TLDRThe video script is a dialogue focused on overcoming communication barriers and building confidence in English language use. It discusses the psychological impact of self-perception in social settings and offers practical advice such as using music to reduce nervousness, recording oneself to improve speech, and mirroring body language to establish rapport. The speaker also emphasizes the importance of eye contact, avoiding filler words, and leveraging technology like ChatGPT for language practice. The conversation touches on the significance of non-verbal cues, personal questions to sustain dialogue, and the transformative power of facing and overcoming fear in communication.

Takeaways

😀 The speaker emphasizes the importance of body language, suggesting that copying someone's gestures can help establish a connection.
🎧 Recommends using instrumental music to help reduce nervousness when speaking, as it can distract from the internal critic.
🗣️ Encourages recording oneself while speaking to provide constructive feedback and improve communication skills.
🤔 Discusses the psychological aspect of feeling inferior or nervous in certain social settings and how it affects communication.
👂 Suggests that not hearing oneself while speaking can be beneficial, as it prevents self-criticism and allows for a more natural flow.
👀 Highlights the significance of making eye contact and being mindful of where one's gaze goes during a conversation.
🤝 Talks about the importance of a firm handshake as a form of non-verbal communication that conveys confidence.
🔍 Advises on how to handle personal questions and the value of asking personal questions to others to build rapport.
💬 Stresses the need to practice speaking English regularly and provides tips on how to use technology like ChatGPT to improve language skills.
🚶‍♀️ Mentions the idea of practicing body language and eye contact in front of a mirror to improve communication skills.

Q & A

What is the main issue the speaker is addressing in the script?
-The speaker is addressing the issue of nervousness and lack of confidence, particularly when communicating in English or in high-pressure social situations.
What is the speaker's advice for overcoming nervousness when speaking English?
-The speaker suggests playing instrumental music in the background to help reduce the focus on one's own voice and to improve fluency. They also recommend recording oneself speaking to provide feedback and identify areas of improvement.
How does the speaker recommend practicing body language to improve communication skills?
-The speaker advises copying the body language of others subconsciously, also known as mirroring, to transmit positive signals and appear more approachable and confident.
What is the significance of the '60% eye contact rule' mentioned in the script?
-The '60% eye contact rule' refers to maintaining eye contact at around 60% of the time during a conversation. This is suggested as a way to balance engagement without appearing too intense or aggressive.
Why does the speaker mention the importance of not being 'throttless' in a conversation?
-Being 'throttless' refers to not having control over one's speech or actions, which can lead to nervousness and a lack of confidence. The speaker emphasizes the importance of controlling one's speech and actions to appear more confident and in control.
What is the speaker's view on using technology to improve communication skills?
-While the speaker is not a big fan of technology for improving communication skills, they acknowledge that tools like ChatGPT can be helpful for practicing English speaking and developing conversation skills.
How does the speaker suggest utilizing the time spent on travel to improve communication skills?
-The speaker recommends allocating a specific amount of travel time, such as 20 minutes, to practice communication skills using tools like ChatGPT, focusing on developing conversation topics and improving language proficiency.
What is the speaker's advice on handling personal questions during a conversation?
-The speaker advises being prepared to answer personal questions and to reciprocate by asking the other person about themselves. This can make the conversation more interesting and engaging for both parties.
Why does the speaker emphasize the importance of a firm handshake?
-A firm handshake is important as it conveys confidence and can set the tone for the initial impression in a conversation. The speaker suggests practicing a firm handshake without being too aggressive.
What does the speaker mean by 'crutch words' and how to avoid using them?
-Crutch words are filler words that people use when they are unsure of what to say next, such as 'um,' 'like,' or 'so.' The speaker advises practicing to avoid using these words by being mindful of speech and replacing them with more meaningful language.
How does the speaker suggest practicing to improve eye contact and facial expressions?
-The speaker suggests practicing eye contact and facial expressions by talking to a mirror, focusing on maintaining a natural gaze and using expressions that reflect genuine emotions to appear more engaging and confident.

Outlines

00:00

🗣️ Overcoming Communication Barriers

The speaker begins by addressing the audience in Hindi, expressing the difficulty of understanding body language and non-verbal cues. They discuss the challenges of communicating in English, especially when feeling inferior or nervous around influential or high-class individuals. The speaker emphasizes the importance of not allowing self-doubt to hinder performance and suggests that high expectations and standards can be inherited from childhood. To overcome nervousness, especially when starting a conversation, the speaker recommends playing music in the ears to avoid self-judgment and improve fluency. They also suggest recording oneself speaking English to identify areas of improvement and to practice speaking without self-consciousness.

05:00

🤝 The Art of the Handshake

The speaker focuses on the importance of the handshake as a form of non-verbal communication, particularly when meeting someone for the first time. They discuss the confidence that a firm handshake can convey and how a weak or incomplete handshake can undermine it. The speaker provides examples of body language during a handshake, such as avoiding crossing arms or holding on for too long, which can make the interaction feel awkward. They also touch upon the concept of mirroring body language to establish rapport and the significance of maintaining good posture to project confidence. The speaker concludes by encouraging practice and the use of technology, like language learning apps, to improve communication skills.

10:01

🚶‍♂️ Utilizing Travel Time for Skill Development

The speaker suggests making the most of travel time, such as a daily commute, by engaging in activities that can improve communication skills. They recommend setting aside 20 minutes to practice English or work on communication skills using tools like language learning apps. The speaker also discusses the importance of body language, advising against excessive hand movements or placing hands in pockets, as these can convey nervousness. They introduce the concept of 'mirroring' as a technique to build rapport and trust through subconscious body language synchronization. The speaker also addresses the challenges of maintaining a straight posture and the impact of slouching on body language. They conclude by encouraging the use of technology and the internet to access free resources and practice materials for improving English and communication skills.

15:03

💬 Embracing Challenges in Communication

In this segment, the speaker emphasizes the importance of facing communication challenges head-on, using a quote by Mark Twain to illustrate the idea that one should confront their fears. They discuss the power of names in communication, suggesting that using someone's name can create a positive connection and make the conversation more engaging. The speaker also talks about the value of asking personal questions to build rapport and make the conversation more interesting, while cautioning against overstepping boundaries. They conclude by highlighting the importance of learning from each conversation and the small talk, which can lead to meaningful connections and personal growth.

Mindmap

Keywords

💡Communication

Communication refers to the process of exchanging information, ideas, or feelings. In the video's context, it is about expressing oneself effectively and understanding others. The script mentions various tips to improve communication skills, such as using body language and avoiding fillers like 'um' and 'uh'.

💡Confidence

Confidence is the belief in one's own abilities. The video emphasizes the importance of being confident in communication, suggesting that if one feels nervous, they can use techniques like playing instrumental music to help them relax and speak more fluently.

💡Body Language

Body language consists of gestures, postures, and other movements that communicate nonverbally. The script discusses how copying another person's body language can make them feel more comfortable and how maintaining good eye contact is crucial for effective communication.

💡Fillers

Fillers are words or sounds that are used to fill gaps in speech, like 'um' and 'uh'. The video suggests that using fewer fillers can make one's speech sound more polished and professional, and it offers strategies to reduce reliance on them.

💡Eye Contact

Eye contact is the act of looking at someone in the eyes while communicating. The script explains that maintaining eye contact is important for showing confidence and interest in the conversation.

💡Handshake

A handshake is a form of nonverbal communication where two people grasp each other's hand as a greeting or to signify agreement. The video provides insights on how a proper handshake can convey confidence and respect.

💡Practice

Practice is the action of repeatedly performing an activity or exercise to improve at it. The script encourages practicing communication skills regularly, such as talking to oneself in the mirror or recording oneself to identify areas for improvement.

💡Instrumental Music

Instrumental music is music without lyrics. The video suggests playing instrumental music as a technique to help reduce nervousness and improve the flow of speech during presentations or conversations.

💡Mirroring

Mirroring, in the context of communication, is the act of subconsciously copying another person's body language, tone, or mannerisms. The script uses mirroring as an example of a technique to build rapport and make others feel more at ease.

💡Personal Questions

Personal questions are inquiries about someone's private life or personal experiences. The video mentions asking personal questions as a way to create a more engaging and interesting conversation.

💡Nonverbal Cues

Nonverbal cues are signals or indicators that are communicated without the use of words. The script highlights how nonverbal cues, such as posture and facial expressions, can convey messages and emotions even when someone is not speaking.

Highlights

The importance of non-verbal cues and body language in communication.

How to overcome nervousness and perform better in social settings.

The psychological impact of high expectations on performance.

Techniques to improve English speaking skills, such as mimicking and recording oneself.

The role of music in reducing anxiety and enhancing self-perception.

Strategies for maintaining eye contact and active listening during conversations.

The significance of a firm handshake and its reflection of confidence.

How to use technology, like chat apps, to practice and improve communication skills.

The benefits of practicing English speaking with friends and the role of feedback.

Tips for reducing the use of filler words and improving speech clarity.

The concept of 'mirroring' in body language to build rapport and trust.

Advice on how to handle personal questions and maintain conversational boundaries.

The influence of body posture and movement on the perception of confidence.

Ways to practice and improve eye contact and facial expressions.

The power of positive affirmations and self-talk in enhancing public speaking abilities.

How to use personal stories and experiences to engage in meaningful conversations.

The importance of active listening and showing genuine interest in what others are saying.

Techniques to handle nervousness and anxiety when starting a conversation.

The role of body language in reflecting confidence and approachability.